Is 200 enough of a wedding present from a couple?

Deleted User wrote: »

In our house a wedding invite is as welcome as a summons. It really is like a summons if its assumed I'll be handing over 200 quid also.

My go to wedding present is a silver photo frame with the date of the wedding for the bride.

If they don't like it, then don't invite me to wedding #2 if there is one.

I'd prefer a photo frame without any engraving or reference to the wedding at all tbh. On our wedding, we got lots of picture frames but they all said 'Love' or 'Him and Her' or stuff like that. We're not the kinds of people who have our house covered in photographs of ourselves in our wedding gear, but we like to have pictures of our family and children etc on the walls.

I think if you're going to a wedding, presumably you actually like the people who are getting married, so you should get them a gift that they can use or would like. If you don't like the couple, don't go. You're not doing them any favours by turning up and looking grumpy and miserable for the whole time.

I got married recently, €200 was a fairly common present from couples, some gave more, some less.

robinph wrote: »

Invited literally only a handful of people to ours, we paid their way and put them up in the same posh hotel, they just had to get themselves there. Nothing as crass as money changing hands needed to occur to fund OUR event. Was far cheaper to pay for the people we actually wanted to celebrate with and spend the money on a more expensive location than it would ever be to invite hundreds of people you barely know to a big event where you get crappy food, don't actually spend time talking to people and then half of them get too drunk and make a tit of themselves.

Got a couple of trinkets as gifts from those that we invited. Was our party we were asking them to attend, would have been offended if they felt the need to pay us for it.

And the key message is to each their own .One likes it one way and another likes it another way .

I think e200 is a bit OTT when you consider the expense of going to a wedding in a hotel -the travel costs usually 2 tanks of petrol, price of the room,day off work and varioud other costs not to mention the round of drinks for the table. Personally I like to buy off a wedding list as I know then its something to the couples taste that they want and will suit their house. I give max 100 if I was giving cash or a voucher. I had a wedding a few years ago and nothing on the wedding list (BT'S).was less.that e300 which I found really offensive - even things that were cheaper were bundled into purchasing units that added up to about e300.which was just offensive and tacky. (Mans branded shirt, designer chopping board & pepper mill -Jesus wept). (Set of 5 towels of various sizes adding to e300) And a 2 day even in.the absolute.middle.of.nowhere in an overinflated but big brand hotel chain wedding not to mwntion the BBQ and more expected drinking the afternoon after.
Some people lose the run of themselves and forget their manners when they get married.
E100 is plenty.

Last wedding I went to was 4 years ago and I gave €50 in a card to a cousin I was close enough with, I went to the wedding alone. I never knew there was a (unwritten rule) minimum value but thankfully I don’t get invited to any weddings these days as I live abroad. I might sound like a Scrooge but the sheer cost of these events is too much and I am trying to save up for a property over here.

We give €200 if its one of us on our own and €300 if we both go. Got married ourselves last year and that was about the go of it. Happy to give it as we were to receive it! Next year we’ve 7 weddings (2 abroad) to go to. That’ll be a balls, cos I’ll be at 4 stags as well so I can safely say it’ll be close to €10k on wedding related activities in 2019.

I give 100 if invited to the full day and 50 if asked to the evening bit.

Have 2 coming up this year that's enough expense for me, some people were telling me that they have 7 or 8 weddings in the year.

Couchpotato82 wrote: »

We give €200 if its one of us on our own and €300 if we both go. Got married ourselves last year and that was about the go of it. Happy to give it as we were to receive it! Next year we’ve 7 weddings (2 abroad) to go to. That’ll be a balls, cos I’ll be at 4 stags as well so I can safely say it’ll be close to €10k on wedding related activities in 2019.

Are you loaded, mad, or both?

I'm completely shocked that couples give €200.
We got married 4 years ago and have been to a dozen weddings since then. We got €200 from very close family and the groomsmen, but close friends gave €100 as a couple. Single people gave €20 or €50...some people gave nothing at all. Didn't bother me in the slightest, but we give €100 as a couple and that's the norm if not generous in our group of friends!!!

1800_Ladladlad wrote: »

Most weddings seem to be abroad now. If i was getting married abroad, I wouldnt be expecting anything from people I invited, but them following through and attending is all I would expect. But at home, my nanny use to always tell us to do something without the thought of a reward. If I invited someone, my expectations would be on them turning up and not on the money given, anything after that would be a plus. set your expectations and standards correctly, but it seems these days its all materialistic

Most Irish people who get married get married in Ireland. I’d say the small minority are abroad. Less than 1% or even 0.5. Do you really believe it’s most.

Also, (at this is completely separate from your post) but I am sick of the amount of time people post here about wedding presents and money. No one cares. Give what you want and that’s it. Life is too short to be spending thinking about it. At the end of the day 1 hundred, 2 hundred, 3 hundred will make absolutely no difference to someone’s life. Go to their wedding. Make it memorable by being there and being you. Give what you want.

Deleted User wrote: »

I think you're overstating it a bit.. Most threads this big have a core group posting a lot. It's just a topic that lots of people have experienced.

Sorry I should have said over in the weddings forum. A lot of threads are about how much to give for gifts causing anxiety.

nthclare wrote: »

Seriously I wouldn't expect people to bring money to my wedding if I was getting married

They work hard enough and they took time off work to share the day with my family and I.

Years ago people didn't expect much from people, now there's a set rate of what people should bring, Fck that ****..

I suppose whoever gave the least would be frowned upon...

I thought a wedding was about the Bride and Groom saving up for the big day and giving everyone a great time...

Totally agree, but judging by the responses here, we didn't get the memo. I would be a fairly generous person by nature, but group funding a showy wedding is just tacky.

Omackeral wrote: »

Its almost as if people are trying to recoup the money they’ve spent on ridiculously lavish weddings!

They are!