What is your impression of Aspergers syndrome?

Wibbs · 05-11-2018 11:14pm

Aye B, for years it was seen as the "Male" condition. I've even heard it described as the "male brain in extremis". Good to see the focus has looked to some women who have it. It's pretty clear the male only focus was a bit daft and hid many girls and women who could have been helped. Maybe they "hide" it better because from very early on girls are pushed more into social interactions, so learn to cope, whereas boys who are more on the loner scale are more accepted and don't learn to cope? Looking back I reckon I've known three women who were classically Aspie. Two were highly qualified and highly regarded medical doctors. One a relative.

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 11:24pm

One eyed Jack wrote: »

The institutionalising of children is where I thought you were going because that’s what generally happens with children with disabilities and developmental disorders when the State steps in in the interests of the children’s welfare when the parents are deemed to be incapable of providing for the child’s needs. They’re institutionalised until they either age out of the system, or are transferred to an adult rehabilitative facility. They don’t go on to have any opportunities in life and the whole process has a detrimental effect on their mental health.

When I say I know where you’re coming from, I really do, as I worked with children and adults with autism and other developmental disorders and intellectual disabilities for a number of years. That’s why the whole ‘aspies’ stuff really ticks me off, because it’s like trying to put a cutsie positive spin on what is a developmental disorder, and also why the whole ‘spectrum’ stuff is, from my point of view at least, a load of bollocks. There’s no risk for example of an adult diagnosed with aspergers putting your head through the window of a transit van because you naively insist on offering him an apple he doesn’t want :pac:

It was definitely a learning experience, from the non-verbal guy who liked to click his fingers in time with the vibrations of the van as we were driving, to the guy who never stopped talking and had a thing for men in uniform I met plenty of parents (many of them elderly themselves) who couldn’t cope with their adult children’s disabilities, but then I also met plenty of parents who could and didn’t want their children labelled. It wasn’t because of any stigma, but simply because they didn’t regard their children in terms of what other people would see as a disability.

I just don’t agree with the current trend to pathologise children with an A to Z of clinical diagnoses which the criteria are being broadened all the time to include more children in this ‘spectrum’ of disorders from mental health disorders to developmental disorders, and there is a growing tendency among some parents to want to have their children diagnosed with something for which the parents can say ‘everything makes sense now’, and while it’s not so prevalent here in this country, in larger populations like the US and the UK it’s rife among certain demographics who have a propensity to want the medical and psychiatric professionals to agree with their diagnosis of their children’s behaviours because being ‘aspie’ or having ‘aspie’ children is trendy among that particular social demographic nowadays, quite the opposite of any perceived stigma about developmental disorders, it’s like it’s regarded as a badge of honour.

The last thing any parent wants is to have their child institutionalized which is why you need parents who fight for their kids to make sure they aren't put into one but also engages with the right services to ensure it never gets that far. I am not sure what its like for folk who are on the Asperger spectrum but the best way to stop it from happening with children with ASD is to get them the right intervention early.

If they don't learn how to communicate properly early on and fall into a routine of violence they will basically face a life where they will be pacified with drugs which is not what you want.

All i have to go on is my little girl who is non-verbal but she can communicate, she is big into picture based communication and when not lazy she will use it all the time. She also has a big problem at the moment with stimming and sensory overload which we are working with an occupational therapist to get a hang of. If we don't work on getting her more verbal she would essentially be to reliant on us hence which is not good for her long term.

As someone who lives with a person on the spectrum i wish it was a fad or something trendy. I just don't think the numbers on this side of the water add up to it being a trend. Not to say you don't get people who will try and get some sort of diagnosis for political reasons but they are few and far between and far removed from people on the ground.

I have mixed feelings on using the term Aspie, if its something that empowers the folks affected by it then why not? Getting positive vibes out their about it is really required to change the lives of vulnerable children. As advised earlier i know a few bluechip companies have setup working teams with folk on the spectrum ect. Its all these things that help folk on the spectrum adapt to modern life.

Saying all that though the world is a harsh place and i know if my girl is to be ok after im gone i have to make sure she can adapt the best she can no matter what is thrown at her.

The Crazy Cat Lady · 06-11-2018 12:33am

I have it as well

Sleeper12 · 06-11-2018 12:36am

Wibbs wrote:

Aye B, for years it was seen as the "Male" condition. I've even heard it described as the "male brain in extremis". Good to see the focus has looked to some women who have it. It's pretty clear the male only focus was a bit daft and hid many girls and women who could have been helped. Maybe they "hide" it better because from very early on girls are pushed more into social interactions, so learn to cope, whereas boys who are more on the loner scale are more accepted and don't learn to cope? Looking back I reckon I've known three women who were classically Aspie. Two were highly qualified and highly regarded medical doctors. One a relative.

I briefly scanned an article earlier suggesting that the rate for girls may be artificially low. They are now thinking that girls are better at covering it up & then the possibility that a lot of the tell tail traits are more masculine traits and are more noticeable in boys.

It'll be interesting to see the results of their research

CinemaGuy45 · 06-11-2018 12:37am

aspiewriter wrote: »

I have it as well

Never would have guessed.;)

Don't mind me:D it is nice to know just how many of us there are quite a few have come out in this thread.

god's toy · 06-11-2018 8:18am

I have said before on here, on how being able to act the part helps cover up your 'aspie-ness' day to day and helps you blend into the background and some people even forget for a time. However it can take just one trivial event (in the eyes of an NT) to undo all the training and coping mechanisms built up over the years.

I had to do a one day course for work, *My mind almost going into panic mode... thinking AHH a course! NOO!!! All those people and talking, small talk!!! AHHHH.. Hold on, Wait, slow breaths. In and out....'You have done this one many times before', I said to myself.. but who will be there?... WAIT, slow down.. you know everyone, it's in your work place, it will be fine, just talk about the weather if someone wants to chat.* Ok Lets do this!

All was fine until I found out they were sending me to an unknown place on my own and no amount of prep could get me fully ready for the day ahead. I was a wreck the whole day but did it! Took a few days of not speaking and having alone time to fully get the event out of my system but it's done now.. for another 4 years anyway.

eviltwin · 06-11-2018 12:30pm

Sleeper12 wrote: »

I briefly scanned an article earlier suggesting that the rate for girls may be artificially low. They are now thinking that girls are better at covering it up & then the possibility that a lot of the tell tail traits are more masculine traits and are more noticeable in boys.

It'll be interesting to see the results of their research

People still think of it as a male condition. My daughter and son both are AS and both have the same struggles but I think it's easier for him, he gets more allowances than she does even with people who know her condition. My daughter is, to be frank, weird. When we explain it's because of her AS I will regularly here "but that only affects boys" or "she cant be AS, she's in college"

There is still a lot of education needed.

wexie · 06-11-2018 1:00pm

Wibbs wrote: »

EG. the Cocktail party effect, where you're at a gathering with the background drone of conversation that you dismiss on an instinctive level, but if someone calls or mentions your name you immediately pick that out. Would you folks with Aspergers be able to do that or would it be just too much stimulation going on?

I can really only speak for myself (and I don't have an AS or ASD diagnosis,just lots of questions) but yeah it's pretty annoying (I'm using a polite word).

Imagine being at that cocktail party and not being able to stop to not just try to listen to everything happening in the room but interpreting it as well, not just all the conversations, ice cubes tinkling in glasses, change in pockets, mobile phone alerts, people moving around, unidentified noises (they're the worst for me) outside or in a different room.

I can usually manage to completely tune out however that kinda defeats the point of going to a party in the first place and on top of that it's not the healthiest coping strategy. Or perhaps defense mechanism is a better word.

There's some good videos on Youtube that simulate sensory overload if you want to have a look.

fattymuatty · 06-11-2018 1:11pm

I haven't read the whole thread but my husband has Aspergers. It only clicked once some younger relatives were diagnosed and he recognised himself in the diagnosis and then went through the process himself.

We were young when we first met and I suppose it is only over time when I have 'grown up' and he hasn't to the same degree that the cracks started to show. Also as he has gotten older certain traits have become more obvious for want of a better word. I love him very much and don't want to slag him(I'm sure he has a fair few complaints about me too!) but for sure his aspergers makes life more difficult for both of us. It has had a tremendous impact on my mental health over the years and I know from speaking to other women who are married to men with Aspergers that I am not alone on that. The very fact that women like me seek out support groups says a lot I suppose. It's hard to describe to someone who isn't married to someone on the spectrum how it can effect you and it isn't something I really talk about to people who don't have direct experience of this and I know everyone else I talk to feels the same.

For now we are happy enough, I have adapted to suit him, I seek emotional support outside of our relationship through friendships as it isn't something my husband is able to give me. He is happy out and completely oblivious to most of the struggles I feel within our relationship(even though we have spoken about them), unless we are actually in the middle of a row our relationship to him is great. He works, he has a good relationship with our children for the most part and even though curiosity made him seek a diagnosis it isn't something he dwells on or has told anyone in real life about.

I don't have one particular image of what someone with ASD is like, I don't think many people who meet my husband would guess he has ASD and I think there are a lot of adults out there who have it and who don't know about it.

Zorya · 06-11-2018 1:14pm

wexie wrote: »

I can really only speak for myself (and I don't have an AS or ASD diagnosis,just lots of questions) but yeah it's pretty annoying (I'm using a polite word).

Imagine being at that cocktail party and not being able to stop to not just try to listen to everything happening in the room but interpreting it as well, not just all the conversations, ice cubes tinkling in glasses, change in pockets, mobile phone alerts, people moving around, unidentified noises (they're the worst for me) outside or in a different room.

I can usually manage to completely tune out however that kinda defeats the point of going to a party in the first place and on top of that it's not the healthiest coping strategy. Or perhaps defense mechanism is a better word.

There's some good videos on Youtube that simulate sensory overload if you want to have a look.

Sensory overload or Wibb's earlier non-pruned neurons (to sum it up perhaps poorly) is a good theory. It could be about learning to view it positively. For all the bad feelings, there are as many if not more potentially magnified good feelings.
I do not have aspergers and yet when people describe aspergers experiences I often feel I can relate and find that the symptoms do not sound dysfunctional - instead they simply sound like eminently sensible reactions to the often crazy way things are. What's wrong with not liking loud parties, busy places, rushing people, loads of electrical stimulation, etc etc?

wexie · 06-11-2018 1:27pm

Zorya wrote: »

I do not have aspergers and yet when people describe aspergers experiences I often feel I can relate and find that the symptoms do not sound dysfunctional - instead they simply sound like eminently sensible reactions to the often crazy way things are. What's wrong with not liking loud parties, busy places, rushing people, loads of electrical stimulation, etc etc?

Nothing really, but it's not just cocktail parties (which I'd happily go without), what about kids, birthday parties, family gatherings, amusement parks, airports, public transport, work gatherings etc. etc. etc.

Chaos and noise is a part of modern life, there's only so much you can do to avoid it before it starts interfering with your ability to actually live it.

Zorya · 06-11-2018 1:39pm

wexie wrote: »

Nothing really, but it's not just cocktail parties (which I'd happily go without), what about kids, birthday parties, family gatherings, amusement parks, airports, public transport, work gatherings etc. etc. etc.

Chaos and noise is a part of modern life, there's only so much you can do to avoid it before it starts interfering with your ability to actually live it.

Yeah, I know, it's hard to avoid especially when the children are smaller and stuff has to be done. But really you are talking about the introvert's many dilemmas. I just keep my focus fairly narrow in noisy places, like at airports listening to music on my headphones, likewise public transport, amusement parks, Jesus, I wouldn't be caught dead in one, kids parties I used to keep busy cooking and minding small children because children make me feel peaceful, family gatherings pretty much the same - in fact being the cook is a great get out clause, you can look like you are part of everything but concentrate on making food! I work alone, self-employed, so no work gatherings thanks be to goodness.
Later on when the children grow up one can much more easily become a happy hermit and people just affectionately shrug you off as weird and you can be perfectly content to only poke your nose out of your hut whenever you actually feel like it. Which happens, unbelievably

mvl · 06-11-2018 9:06pm

Sleeper12 wrote: »

I briefly scanned an article earlier suggesting that the rate for girls may be artificially low. They are now thinking that girls are better at covering it up & then the possibility that a lot of the tell tail traits are more masculine traits and are more noticeable in boys.

It'll be interesting to see the results of their research

Can you plse include a link instead of quoting ? Maybe "they" didn't use the correct diagnosis methods for girls

- also interested in what are the deltas between male/female Asperger's.
Earlier I've also included in one of my posts a link to Tania Marshals blog - focus on female aspie traits.

Now adding another link describing how it is different :
https://www.kennethrobersonphd.com/women-aspergers-different-matter/

An important consequence of these characteristics is that women are at greater risk of having undetected Asperger’s than are men. By internalizing their problems and appearing sad, lonely or withdrawn rather than disruptive or troublesome, they fall below the radar of family, friends, and professionals. Because of their social motivation and better non-verbal communication, they are often diagnosed with mood or stress-related disorders, rather than Asperger’s. This is compounded by a frequent bias among professionals that women can’t have Asperger’s. As a result, women require more severe symptoms and a greater number of symptoms to meet the criteria for an Asperger’s diagnosis.

Sleeper12 · 06-11-2018 9:20pm

mvl wrote: »

Can you plse include a link instead of quoting ? Maybe "they" didn't use the correct diagnosis methods for girls

I posted that last night after getting home from the U2 gig. Here are some links

https://www.abc.net.au/7.30/autism-more-common-in-girls-than-previously-thought/9694098

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/sep/14/thousands-of-autistic-girls-and-women-going-undiagnosed-due-to-gender-bias

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/autism-it-s-different-in-girls/

https://www.wired.co.uk/article/underdiagnosis-autism-women-and-girls

https://nbatests.com/do-girls-and-women-camoflauge-autism/

https://www.autismparentingmagazine.com/signs-of-autism-in-girls/

mvl · 06-11-2018 9:59pm

thanks, no worries.

having opened a couple of links, they're similar to what I included above.
but actually was asking about the one with "artificially low"

PS: 23:36 is what I would call an early evening - was it good ?

Sleeper12 · 06-11-2018 10:11pm

mvl wrote:

PS: 23:36 is what I would call an early evening - was it good ?

I'm on a 10 minute drive from the Three arena at that time hour of the night

Great show.

AndrewJRenko · 07-11-2018 11:26pm

Zorya wrote: »

What's wrong with not liking loud parties, busy places, rushing people, loads of electrical stimulation, etc etc?

I heard that when Supervalu in Clonakilty introduced a 'quiet night' on Tuesday evenings for people with autism, with no background music and no paging, it turned into a very popular night for lots of people who just preferred the quiet.

skooterblue2 · 07-11-2018 11:54pm

Jack Moore wrote: »

balderdash

Wozniack, Gates, Boole, Hawkins, Turing...... want to rethink that? Those are just for starters

skooterblue2 · 08-11-2018 7:32pm

mikemac2 wrote: »

If someone has a diagnosis for Aspergers and acts like that in the workplace do they get a free pass? Can’t discipline me, it’s my condition

It doesnt work like that either, you get hired with the understanding that there will be certain social faux pauxs made and you choose your role in industry very carefully as not to burn out, create stress and work within the limitations of the system. Once you start to exceed those limitations, you dont get your contract renewed, returned to the agency, fired, or whatever.

god's toy · 08-11-2018 9:42pm

skooterblue2 wrote: »

It doesnt work like that either, you get hired with the understanding that there will be certain social faux pauxs made and you choose your role in industry very carefully as not to burn out, create stress and work within the limitations of the system. Once you start to exceed those limitations, you dont get your contract renewed, returned to the agency, fired, or whatever.

Indeed, I make it a point to always go back and apologize if (in the heat of the moment/moment of my stress) my internal filters go off-line and I end up speaking my mind for everyone to hear. I have found it's so easy to stand up to the colleague, Super or even CEO in anger when I believe I'm right but so hard to return and apologize later after I had time to think about it... If I didn't I'm sure I would have been sacked years ago.

CinemaGuy45 · 08-11-2018 10:41pm

mikemac2 wrote: »

If someone has a diagnosis for Aspergers and acts like that in the workplace do they get a free pass? Can’t discipline me, it’s my condition

People with Aspergers are not good at being manipulative so this just does not happen.
The most one can hope for is if the person on the spectrum is really good at their job they are worth having around.

As for social mistakes, the strategy is to apologise and kiss ass.

No special treatment if a person becomes more of a liability than an asset they are gone and people with Aspergers far from having a free pass are in-fact much more vulnerable to getting the chop.

Grayson · 09-11-2018 1:00am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

A number of posters on this very board have it and they are a mixed bag.

A relatives son has it a friends grandson has it I work with a couple of people with it.
I notice some of those with the condition are prone to online trolling for the sake of attention seeking as they seem unable to interact with people in a normal way.

My impression of these people is that they are very annoying and emotionally immature.
They may seem intelligent but they seem to panic when they have to do anything outside their narrow comfort zone.

They seem to mess up all relationships and friendships that is if they can even form them in the first place.
They also come across as selfish and weird and they can ask the same question over and over again as if looking for reassurance.

Despite the PC version of the syndrome these people seem prone to mood swings and bursts of anger if they are pushed too far outside their comfort zone.

What are your impressions of people with Aspergers am I being unfair or am I being truthful?

Are these people weirdos creepy and anlying?

You do realise that those two things describe humans in general?

I'd suggest you go out there are meet some people who are ASD. Actually, maybe it's best to start with some youtube videos and articles. And remember if you know one person who has ASD all you know about ASD is that you know one person with it.

Unless you are just trying to troll people who are ASD.

CinemaGuy45 · 09-11-2018 1:04am

Grayson wrote: »

You do realise that those two things describe humans in general?

I'd suggest you go out there are meet some people who are ASD. Actually, maybe it's best to start with some youtube videos and articles. And remember if you know one person who has ASD all you know about ASD is that you know one person with it.

Unless you are just trying to troll people who are ASD.

Did you read any of the thread?

I have ASD I just wanted to see how many people would agree with that post and I am glad to say not many.

fryup · 09-11-2018 7:47pm

here's Ricky's take on it....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzGIFkin5v0

CinemaGuy45 · 10-11-2018 12:14am

fryup wrote: »

here's Ricky's take on it....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzGIFkin5v0

Right, forget Aspergers I am autistic and I have to admit I got a laugh from that.

One thing I did notice Ricky uses his arms and hands a lot when he is talking

Are you surprised some of us have a sense of humour?

I love the TV series he did Derek.

CinemaGuy45 · 10-11-2018 12:21am

What is your impression of Aspergers syndrome?

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