Putting people in their place.

--Kaiser-- · 12-08-2013 9:43am

Cringy thread

Ficheall · 12-08-2013 10:05am

Mugatuu wrote: »

In the shop I work in, a large group of students came in the other day, three guys came up to the counter, they were all fairly tall, seemed older and I didn't think they were part of the students, one of them was a good 6ft and I asked did he get any petrol or diesel and he laughed in my face and handed me a bottle of sprite.

I looked and him and repeated the question and he goes "erm no I'm 18 for god sake?!" I replied "I assume you didn't get fuel then". and he responds with "clearly not... I got a bottle of sprite" proceeds to point to it on the counter and goes "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!"

Seen as he was rude to me for no reason and clearly acting up in front of his friends I decided to put him in his place and told him no I clearly didn't want to see his little age card and asked him if he wanted a medal? he started to go all red and I handed him a "share a coke" key-ring, he asked what the key-ring was for and I told him it was for his bruised ego and his friends burst out laughing at him and he went even more red!

In fairness he deserved to be put in his place for showing of to his friends by being rude to me.. idiot !:pac:

LisaLee wrote: »

I was working in a deli and we had a hot food unit with a door that customers could open on their side of the counter and take out the food (burgers, chicken wings etc). It had a sign above it called 'Grab and Go'.

One day a group of lads came in and one of them stands in front of it, has a look and knocks on the glass of the unit.
Guy: "Hey! Here, you!"
Me: "Yes?"
Guy: "Gimme a burger and some chicken wings"
*His friends are watching and smirking*
Me: "Sure, just open the door on your side and take them out."
Guy: "What? How does this thing work?"
Me: *Pointing to the sign* It's a grab and go unit. You just open the door and grab the food you want, then go to the till and pay for it.

He went bright red and his friends fell about the place laughing at him. Not the first time he had tried showing off in the shop in front of his mates, but it was the last time!

I don't really get these two either.
I blame the OP for getting things off to a bad start.

Pudders · 12-08-2013 10:21am

I get it. It is one of those thinly veiled look at how successful my other half is because he can afford a smart phone AND insurance threads.

Good luck with ever claiming on the insurance by the way!

Dixie Chick · 12-08-2013 10:22am

No idea what the OP is talking about.

Mine is a silly one but only happened yesterday. Was coming in from the car with my shopping (i live in town) and I had a big pack of kitchen roll and this little skanger with his skanger friends were watching me struggle will all the stuff and one said "are you going in for a fine **** with all your toilet roll" and I replied "you wipe your ass with kitchen roll do ya" and his friends were all going ooooooooo ooooooooo and he called me an ugly bitch then. And I cried.

shleedance · 12-08-2013 10:26am

I think the OP's comeback was to pretend they were stupid by saying "two of them". Otherwise, I have no clue. This coming from a guy who can never think of a good comeback.

Leftist · 12-08-2013 10:35am

Dixie Chick wrote: »

No idea what the OP is talking about.

Mine is a silly one but only happened yesterday. Was coming in from the car with my shopping (i live in town) and I had a big pack of kitchen roll and this little skanger with his skanger friends were watching me struggle will all the stuff and one said "are you going in for a fine **** with all your toilet roll" and I replied "you wipe your ass with kitchen roll do ya" and his friends were all going ooooooooo ooooooooo and he called me an ugly bitch then. And I cried.

both very good comments tbh. The ugly bitch bit means you win.

Lando Griffin · 12-08-2013 8:42pm

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

Chucken · 12-08-2013 8:48pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

While you're here, would you mind explaining the joke to us?

Itwasntme. · 12-08-2013 8:57pm

I get it :cool:.

wil · 12-08-2013 9:02pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

Thank you. Yes there is an opening for a current affairs type person in AH.
You do have a typewriter dont you?

Chucken · 12-08-2013 9:15pm

Itwasntme. wrote: »

I get it :cool:.

Tell us?

Annasopra · 12-08-2013 9:18pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

and?

wesf · 12-08-2013 9:20pm

There is nothing to get, worst comeback ever. Unfollowing this, stopped being funny 10 pages ago

Cale · 12-08-2013 9:37pm

I feel sorry for the OP. I can only imagine what it's like when you realise Alan Partridge is cooler than you.

keelanj69 · 12-08-2013 9:51pm

This thread was a delight. Which makes the awful joke just about worth it.

Best At Doing Wheelies · 12-08-2013 10:21pm

Mugatuu wrote: »

In the shop I work in, a large group of students came in the other day, three guys came up to the counter, they were all fairly tall, seemed older and I didn't think they were part of the students, one of them was a good 6ft and I asked did he get any petrol or diesel and he laughed in my face and handed me a bottle of sprite.

I looked and him and repeated the question and he goes "erm no I'm 18 for god sake?!" I replied "I assume you didn't get fuel then". and he responds with "clearly not... I got a bottle of sprite" proceeds to point to it on the counter and goes "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!"

Seen as he was rude to me for no reason and clearly acting up in front of his friends I decided to put him in his place and told him no I clearly didn't want to see his little age card and asked him if he wanted a medal? he started to go all red and I handed him a "share a coke" key-ring, he asked what the key-ring was for and I told him it was for his bruised ego and his friends burst out laughing at him and he went even more red!

In fairness he deserved to be put in his place for showing of to his friends by being rude to me.. idiot !:pac:

If anything the young lad put you in your place with his reply asking "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!" ...Brilliant! Pure wit! Your reaction giving him a cocacola keyring (??) was just milking the filthy redner on your face. Laughed at! Nothing funnier than someone getting ruined by a bunch of kids.

wil · 12-08-2013 10:54pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion
.

Who was confused

Mugatuu · 12-08-2013 11:58pm

Best At Doing Wheelies wrote: »

If anything the young lad put you in your place with his reply asking "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!" ...Brilliant! Pure wit! Your reaction giving him a cocacola keyring (??) was just milking the filthy redner on your face. Laughed at! Nothing funnier than someone getting ruined by a bunch of kids.

Would ya gway he did not put me in my place!:pac: I wouldn't call him asking if I wanted to see his age card wit, more him being an arrogant little sh*t showing off in front of his friends. I didn't have a filthy redner on my face at all, dealing with all sorts of people like him coming into the shop I'm usually pretty immune to stupid carry on. The kids didn't ruin me, the other two he was with came across quite nice

The keyring was for his bruised ego for getting put in place in front of his friends for being rude.. :rolleyes:

Mr Keek · 13-08-2013 1:01am

If your are gonna say "we have two of them" you need to do it Hans Gruber style. That really puts them in their place

Best At Doing Wheelies · 13-08-2013 1:19am

Mugatuu wrote: »

Would ya gway he did not put me in my place!:pac: I wouldn't call him asking if I wanted to see his age card wit, more him being an arrogant little sh*t showing off in front of his friends. I didn't have a filthy redner on my face at all, dealing with all sorts of people like him coming into the shop I'm usually pretty immune to stupid carry on. The kids didn't ruin me, the other two he was with came across quite nice The keyring was for his bruised ego for getting put in place in front of his friends for being rude.. :rolleyes:

Having to recite the story and brag about it in this forum not once, but twice... you still seem a bit upset over it. The kids retort for funnier is what I'm trying to say, you key ring for his bruised ego is lame...cringe.. I'm out

Mugatuu · 13-08-2013 8:56am

Best At Doing Wheelies wrote: »

Having to recite the story and brag about it in this forum not once, but twice... you still seem a bit upset over it. The kids retort for funnier is what I'm trying to say, you key ring for his bruised ego is lame...cringe.. I'm out

Well to be clear I wasn't bragging I posted it as I thought it was relevant to the thread

Im not upset about it I tried to explain my post to you was all .. my bad it seems

keithclancy · 13-08-2013 9:11am

Around 12 years ago I was in the Q bar on O'Connells bridge, had just moved up from Cork to Dublin

There was a group of girls at the bar and this guy walked over and said 'excuse me'

Girls completely blanked him, so again he said, 'hi, sorry excuse me' think he was from somewhere around Tipperary.

Yer one turned around and said in a weird fake english accent

WHO THE FOK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE
DO YOU who I am like
I DO NOT WAYSTE TIME ON THE LIKES OF YOU
YOU ARE NOT EVEN AT A LEVEL TO SPEAK TO ME LIKE
OH MY GOD GET OUT OF MY FACE AND CRAWL BACK INTO YOUR BOGGER HOLE.

Guy just said

"You dropped your phone walking out of the toilet"

Just shook his head slightly with disapproval/confusion handed her the phone and walked off.

Everyone around that saw/heard the incident started breaking their asses laughing and yer one stormed off out of the bar.

IK09 · 13-08-2013 9:41am

You see what actually happened here was, the OP went into a store, make a complete fúcking idiot out of himself and now he is here to tell us all about it.

bear1 · 13-08-2013 10:00am

Thread of the year? Purely on the basis that it makes absolutely no fúcking sense at all

CarMe · 13-08-2013 3:19pm

I reeeally wish OP would come back!!

Birneybau · 13-08-2013 3:25pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

CarMe wrote: »

I reeeally wish OP would come back!!

CarMe, meet the OP.

7ofBrian · 13-08-2013 3:26pm

confused

pundy · 13-08-2013 3:30pm

can you put someone in their place days after an incident has happened? or would that be called revenge??

jimgoose · 13-08-2013 3:35pm

pundy wrote: »

can you put someone in their place days after an incident has happened? or would that be called revenge??

A form of L'esprit de l'escalier, methinks.

u_c_thesecond · 13-08-2013 4:25pm

Few years ago when i was much bigger and trying to shed weight i went walking along the bypass with my sister. Man walked passed us and said " nice day for it ladies" and my sis said "yep has to be done sure". 2 traveller teenagers nearby yelled out "oh yea fatties it deffo has to be done" so i yelled back "Well at least my sister isint my mother"

How we didnt get chased and beaten is beyond me:D

December2012 · 13-08-2013 4:26pm

u_c_thesecond wrote: »

Few years ago when i was much bigger and trying to shed weight i went walking along the bypass with my sister. Man walked passed us and said " nice day for it ladies" and my sis said "yep has to be done sure". 2 traveller teenagers nearby yelled out "oh yea fatties it deffo has to be done" so i yelled back "Well at least my sister isint my mother"

How we didnt get chased and beaten is beyond me:D

That is a good one!

Itwasntme. · 14-08-2013 4:25pm

I declare everyone who didn't get it a humour free zone. The OP put that lady in her place. Wifi? I have three.

Birneybau · 14-08-2013 4:31pm

Itwasntme. wrote: »

I declare everyone who didn't get it a humour free zone. The OP put that lady in her place. Wifi? I have three.

Yeah, but, it's his reaction, as if he crossed his arms and smirked at her is the issue.

If he had said, "I laughingly said we had 2", well maybe he would have gotten the benefit of the doubt.

ScumLord · 14-08-2013 4:36pm

Well this is one thread that certainly lived up to it's title.

Chucken · 14-08-2013 4:41pm

Itwasntme. wrote: »

I declare everyone who didn't get it a humour free zone. The OP put that lady in her place. Wifi? I have three.

I still don't get it

Burky126 · 14-08-2013 4:49pm

I smirked.Thread gets a smirk from me.

realdanbreen · 14-08-2013 4:50pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

So today my OH was buying a smart phone and the assistant was loving showing off how tech savy she was when she asked " You have wifi dont you" in a patronising way.
My OH looked at me quizingly to which I replied " yea, we have two of them"
This shut her right up and we bought the phone and insurance and left.
Have you ever put some wise crack in their place?

Just curious OP, but why did your OH look at you 'quizingly' ?:cool:

princess-lala · 14-08-2013 8:16pm

Some auld boot said I looked like a boy the other day - I quickly turned around and said " At least I don't look like you"

I'm usually the one who thinks of these things to say the following day :rolleyes:

keelanj69 · 14-08-2013 8:26pm

princess-lala wrote: »

Some auld boot said I looked like a boy the other day - I quickly turned around and said " At least I don't look like you"

I'm usually the one who thinks of these things to say the following day :rolleyes:

That reminds me of one. I was driving between Thurles and Kilkenny and stopped into a shop on the way. Some old man was in there and asked 'Are you a boy?' (I had long hair at the time)
'are you a boy or a girl? Do you have a little willy?'

I was like the fúck? He was bursting his hole laughing so I told him to 'go fúck yourself you old cúnt' and gave him the finger as i drove away.

Fúcking wierdo.

Lawrence1895 · 14-08-2013 8:28pm

I always put people in their place, I'm a steward in one of the LoI grounds

midlandsmissus · 14-08-2013 9:09pm

Is Lando a man?

PhlegmyMoses · 14-08-2013 9:23pm

Was on a bus a while ago and a few scrotes, around 14/15, were giving some hipster looking lad a load of abuse. The chief abuser was as fat as shít and trying to show off to his mates. Anyway, he started calling the bloke a paedo - the beard and glasses probably gave him the idea. He started saying "I bet you want to ride me, don't you, you paedo?", to which the previously silent bloke replied "Sorry, you have the wrong person, I don't **** baby whales....." From the laughs of his mates, you knew he'd be hearing that for a while afterwards.

whirlpool · 14-08-2013 9:30pm

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I forgot about this thread. Seems to have caused alot of confusion

I am working on better threads that stem away from personal experiences and more current affairs type stuff.

For crying out loud. Would you not just explain your post for everyone please? Doesn't seem like a lot to ask, considering nobody understood it.

Sir Osis of Liver. · 14-08-2013 9:45pm

Elbaston wrote: »

While telling the OP that he has sand in his vagina, we're putting him in his place, thus having sand in our own collective vagina.

Wtf?

Sand in our collective vaginas.
Pull yourself together man.

wil · 15-08-2013 12:24pm

whirlpool wrote: »

For crying out loud. Would you not just explain your post for everyone please? Doesn't seem like a lot to ask, considering nobody understood it.

Nobody? I dont understand.

What is it that is not understood?
Are you understanding the misunderstanding but not understanding the misunderstanding about the misunderstanding,
or do you not understand the misunderstanding, so understanding the misunderstanding, but not understanding the misunderstanding about the misunderstanding?

I'm not sure I understand...
..about the misunderstanding...
...about the misunderstanding....
....not about the misunderstanding about the misunderstanding.

Kur4mA · 15-08-2013 12:36pm

shleedance wrote: »

I can never think of one to save my life.

The closest I got was when a knackerish kid said to me as I went down the road "nice bike" in a very sarcastic tone. I replied "nice hat" in an equally sarcastic tone.

Correct response:

"You should see me other bike. It's YORE MA!" :pac:

*LOLLERCHORTLE*

steddyeddy · 15-08-2013 1:11pm

When ever anyone tries to go one up on me I reply "my dad could beat your dad"!

wil · 15-08-2013 1:18pm

steddyeddy wrote: »

When ever anyone tries to go one up on me I reply "my dad could beat your dad"!

My dad's dead. Why would you even say that?

Wetbench4 · 15-08-2013 1:39pm

I have two wifi networks in my home, one has changed dns settings so i can get american netflix and the other has unchanged dns settings. All you need is another router.

Joe10000 · 15-08-2013 10:39pm

I once told a girl that the only thing she deserved from life was cancer.

At the time it seemed like the put down of the century but since that day and for the 15 years since it haunts me day and night.

Putting people in their place.

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