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Present for wedding afters?

  • 09-03-2016 12:07AM
    #1
    shamrock2004
    Closed Accounts Posts: 603 ✭✭✭


    I've been invited to the afters of a wedding boardsies. I've been wondering about the whole wedding present idea. I know some people would eschew investing in a wedding present because you were not invited to the wedding itself, while others have no issues. I'm undecided. I'm interested in knowing what others think?


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Comments

  • #2
    nullzero
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,166 ✭✭✭✭nullzero
    °°°°°


    I wouldn't bother. Maybe €20 in a card at a push.


  • #3
    me_irl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,400 ✭✭✭me_irl


    Card and a couple of scratchers be grand.


  • #4
    Your Face
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,275 ✭✭✭Your Face


    Card and a get a drink for the bride and groom.


  • #5
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 26,219 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    My parents recently got a wedding invitation with 'Your presence on our special day is the only gift we want' written on it.

    A world away from the increasingly common trend of basically charging admission.


  • #6
    chillin117
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 731 ✭✭✭chillin117


    They will be half cut when you arrive so just arrive, Presents for an afters invite is OTT. Was a present mentioned on the invite ?


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  • #7
    PARlance
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,635 ✭✭✭✭PARlance


    Candie wrote: »
    My parents recently got a wedding invitation with 'Your presence on our special day is the only gift we want' written on it.

    A world away from the increasingly common trend of basically charging admission.

    Probably a typo.
    Your presents on our.....


  • #8
    shamrock2004
    Closed Accounts Posts: 603 ✭✭✭shamrock2004


    chillin117 wrote: »
    They will be half cut when you arrive so just arrive, Presents for an afters invite is OTT. Was a present mentioned on the invite ?

    Dont think so


  • #9
    L'prof
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,106 ✭✭✭✭L'prof


    Haven't gotten too many afters invites. I generally throw half of what I usually do into a card. Same if I'm invited to full wedding but can't attend.


  • #10
    scdublin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 643 ✭✭✭scdublin


    Card and a few bob. You're going to be there for the band/dj, probably have some cake and maybe sandwiches or other food that they'll serve later on so no harm in contributing/wishing them well at the same time.


  • #11
    razorblunt
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,300 ✭✭✭✭razorblunt


    50 quid voucher is my go to for any afters.


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  • #12
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 24,773 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    50 euro or 100 as a couple I'd say would be about right for an afters invite. No way would I go empty handed.


  • #13
    DareGod
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,298 ✭✭✭DareGod


    There's

    (A) the marriage ceremony,
    (B) the wedding reception, where the meal takes place.
    (C) the "afters"

    So you were only invited to (C) the afters?

    No, no gift needed. But maybe something small if you want.


  • #14
    hynesie08
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,947 ✭✭✭✭hynesie08


    A white Argos value toaster.


  • #15
    thattequilagirl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,158 ✭✭✭thattequilagirl


    DareGod wrote: »
    There's

    (A) the marriage ceremony,
    (B) the wedding reception, where the meal takes place.
    (C) the "afters"

    So you were only invited to (C) the afters?

    No, no gift needed. But maybe something small if you want.

    I think it's rude to turn up with nothing.

    If I cared enough to go (probably wouldn't bother if I wasn't invited to the wedding) I'd get a small, thoughtful gift.

    It shouldn't be purely about what they spent vs what you spent.


  • #16
    Boom_Bap
    Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,740 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    A sunbed


  • #17
    DareGod
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,298 ✭✭✭DareGod


    thattequilagirl wrote: »
    I think it's rude to turn up with nothing.

    If I cared enough to go (probably wouldn't bother if I wasn't invited to the wedding) I'd get a small, thoughtful gift.

    It shouldn't be purely about what they spent vs what you spent.

    True, but if you can't afford to buy a small gift then don't worry about it.


  • #18
    Buona Fortuna
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭Buona Fortuna


    Boom_Bap wrote: »
    A sunbed

    Shure we get enough sun here.


  • #19
    Keane2baMused
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,576 ✭✭✭Keane2baMused


    DareGod wrote: »
    There's

    (A) the marriage ceremony,
    (B) the wedding reception, where the meal takes place.
    (C) the "afters"

    So you were only invited to (C) the afters?

    No, no gift needed. But maybe something small if you want.

    Maybe...If the person isn't going to listen to the (presumably) expensive band and dj and eat the evening food and cake.

    No harm to throw a few quid into a card.


  • #20
    boobar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,226 ✭✭✭boobar


    Personally I wouldn't bother with a present as I very much doubt the couple getting married would expect one.

    Just go have a few pints and eat your own bodyweight in cocktail sausages.


  • #21
    harry Bailey esq
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,814 ✭✭✭harry Bailey esq


    Unless it's immediate family,cash is king.


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  • #22
    cowboyBuilder
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,419 ✭✭✭cowboyBuilder


    I'd turn up billigerantly drunk and looking for explanations on why I wasn't invited to the main event.

    No gift needed, and maybe I'd start rugby tacking randomers later on when everyone is really nice and sozzled - but that's just me.


  • #23
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,236 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Personally I would give a small gift

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #24
    harry Bailey esq
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,814 ✭✭✭harry Bailey esq


    Joeytheparrot wrote: »
    Personally I would give a small gift

    A card and cash, people notice these things. Turn up empty handed and it won't go unnoticed,you'll be forever branded a miserable c*nt amongst your peers.


  • #25
    Electric Sheep
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,114 ✭✭✭Electric Sheep


    Keane2baMused wrote: »
    Maybe...If the person isn't going to listen to the (presumably) expensive band and dj and eat the evening food and cake.

    No harm to throw a few quid into a card.

    And bump up the bar's intake, so a couple who say they are inviting such a number to the afters will get a discount based on the extra bar profit. The evening food and cake usually come free as a result.


  • #26
    MadDog76
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,162 ✭✭✭MadDog76


    For a full Wedding, I'd give €100 minimum (€200 minimum when going as a couple) but €0 for the Afters ......... in fact, I wouldn't even bother going to an Afters at all to be honest.


  • #27
    MadDog76
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,162 ✭✭✭MadDog76


    harry Bailey esq wrote: »
    A card and cash, people notice these things. Turn up empty handed and it won't go unnoticed,you'll be forever branded a miserable c*nt amongst your peers.

    I'd hope it is noticed ......... because I'd notice that the miserable c*nts didn't invite me to their full Wedding! :mad:


  • #28
    Harriet123
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6 ✭Harriet123


    A card and maybe I will give a voucher if I liked the couple.


  • #29
    Cupcake_Crisis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,448 ✭✭✭✭Cupcake_Crisis


    Generally I'll give the afters a miss. If I'm not good enough for the full thing, I'm not good enough for the afters.

    If I HAVE to go, €50 in a card max!


  • #30
    PaulKK
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,263 ✭✭✭PaulKK


    Harriet123 wrote: »
    A card and maybe I will give a voucher if I liked the couple.

    Tbh you are better off just giving cash.

    Even those one 4 all vouchers are a PITA.

    50 quid in a card for an afters for a couple is how I'd usually do it.


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  • #31
    Keane2baMused
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,576 ✭✭✭Keane2baMused


    Electric Sheep wrote: »
    And bump up the bar's intake, so a couple who say they are inviting such a number to the afters will get a discount based on the extra bar profit. The evening food and cake usually come free as a result.

    Cake comes for free? What hotel did you get married in?

    Evening food is anything from 5-15 euro per head also.

    I've also never known a venue to give a discount based on evening numbers because of a bar spend. Those invited to the afters are not definite attends so why would a hotel offer a large discount?

    There's very little free in life, especially in weddings.


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