How often do you take a dump ?

Ally Dick · 30-01-2016 10:17PM #1

I know that there is another poo-centric thread on here, but this is a bit different. I got talking to my buddies last night, and one of them told me that he goes to the jacks for a sit down once a week. I was shocked. I go every morning before my shower....but rarely twice....unless I have been drinking and eating rubbish. Is once a week more normal than once a day ?

Man11 · 30-01-2016 10:19PM

Something wrong there if its once , every morning before my shower too.
Tell him to get checked . Defo not normal

30-01-2016 10:20PM

The acceptable range is once every 9 days, or 9 times a day. Outside that, get help.

Wait, no, that's masturbation.

antodeco · 30-01-2016 10:20PM

2 - 3 times a day depending how my intestines are feeling

The Moldy Gowl · 30-01-2016 10:22PM

My company makes a dollar while I make a dime, that's why I poop on company time.

Stoned Since 2011 · 30-01-2016 10:23PM

I scour 9 times a day.

Fleawuss · 30-01-2016 10:23PM

Why are my bowel movements of interest to the net? Slow night for the NSA?

thunderdog · 30-01-2016 10:23PM

2 is the magic number

a fat guy · 30-01-2016 10:24PM

Once a day, unless I've had very little to eat (I just don't get hungry if I stay inside all day, meaning no poop) or if I've had a coffee (laxative!).

Sounds like your friends is up **** creek OP.

con___manx1 · 30-01-2016 10:26PM

I gave up the fags on the 1st of January and now taking more regular dumps than I used too.usually once a day where before it could be every two or 3 days.

Ally Dick · 30-01-2016 10:30PM

Ever since I've had haemorroids, my dumps are considerably smaller in size

ardinn · 30-01-2016 10:33PM

I can go a week - I told the doc and he says "sure if thats what ye do thats what ye do" - But normally 3/5 days!!

blade1 · 30-01-2016 10:39PM

Fleawuss wrote: »

Why are my bowel movements of interest to the net? Slow night for the NSA?

Whats the NSA?
National Shîtters association?

My name is URL · 30-01-2016 10:46PM

ardinn wrote: »

I can go a week - I told the doc and he says "sure if thats what ye do thats what ye do" - But normally 3/5 days!!

Eat some vegetables ffs!

RobertKK · 30-01-2016 10:46PM

Once a week????

Fibre people, fibre, what the hell are these people eating?
Also drink enough water.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 30-01-2016 10:49PM

There used to be a man on here years ago who was very well versed on this particular subject. His insight is sorely missed on threads like this.

beertons · 30-01-2016 10:51PM

Twice a day, like clockwork. After brekkie, after dinner. Ever day. Just like my dad. I try to get to the jacks before him, otherwise it's a bit stinky.

fleet_admiral · 30-01-2016 10:55PM

Whenever my Camilla Parkers come calling, Im like clockwork in the morning when I get up though

fleet_admiral · 30-01-2016 10:56PM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

There used to be a man on here years ago who was very well versed on this particular subject. His insight is sorely missed on threads like this.

Good ole Flut

Hammer89 · 30-01-2016 11:04PM

Ally Dick wrote: »

I know that there is another poo-centric thread on here, but this is a bit different. I got talking to my buddies last night, and one of them told me that he goes to the jacks for a sit down once a week. I was shocked. I go every morning before my shower....but rarely twice....unless I have been drinking and eating rubbish. Is once a week more normal than once a day ?

He's full of sh*t either way.

JackieBauer · 30-01-2016 11:15PM

BOOM BOOM POO

ToddyDoody · 30-01-2016 11:18PM

Does your poo go grey when you get old?

Utdfan20titles · 30-01-2016 11:21PM

Depends how much **** I eat

Gael23 · 30-01-2016 11:22PM

Always once a day, sometimes twice. But rarely at the same time each day.

I got a serious bout of constipation 2 years ago which nearly landed me in hospital so if I don't have movement daily ever since, I take something to make sure I do

Fleawuss · 30-01-2016 11:24PM

blade1 wrote: »

Whats the NSA?
National Shîtters association?

Yes.

Ally Dick · 30-01-2016 11:24PM

Your sh1t goes white if you eat bone marrow, and it goes black if you are taking iron

The_Valeyard · 30-01-2016 11:29PM

Wow, two sh*t threads in AH today :P

micar · 30-01-2016 11:33PM

Ally Dick wrote: »

Your sh1t goes white if you eat bone marrow, and it goes black if you are taking iron

That's why you sometimes come across white dog poo. But, it was more common years ago.

Ally Dick · 30-01-2016 11:36PM

The_Valeyard wrote: »

Wow, two sh*t threads in AH today :P

Yeah. Sh1t happens. And I am watching poo inspections on Big Brother too, taped from last night

Ally Dick · 30-01-2016 11:59PM

Stoned Since 2011 wrote: »

Just managed a shwank there.

What in god's name is that ?

Stoned Since 2011 · 31-01-2016 12:00AM

Ally Dick wrote: »

What in god's name is that ?

Its only for grown ups.

How often do you take a dump ?

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