Stupidest thing you've overheard?

toptom · 06-11-2015 08:39PM

Down at the Rock of Cashel queuing for a choc ice and two Americans ahead of me and overheard one ask the other " why doesn't the castle have a roof on it" found it fair funny

SEPT 23 1989 · 06-11-2015 08:41PM

The twin towers was attacked by a Tallaght man instead of the taliban

Kev W · 06-11-2015 08:43PM

I would add every lyric to every Doors song to the list.

Also when the Scorpion King spinoff from the Mummy movies came out I overheard a guy who had somehow convinced himself that the movies had always been "Scorpion King" movies and could not get his head around why they had named the series "" The Scorpion King", "The Scorpion King Returns" and then "The Scorpion King" again.

jamesbere · 06-11-2015 08:44PM

SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »

The twin towers was attacked by a Tallaght man instead of the taliban

Haha love it

Medusa22 · 06-11-2015 08:57PM

Last year I was on a hen night with my friend and we started talking about the famine (can't remember why) and one of my friends asked if the famine was still going on or if it had ended in the 80s. I actually just looked at her gobsmacked and I couldn't reply, another friend of mine swooped in and said it was the 1840s but it was easy to get confused

Another friend of mine when we were teenagers in McDonalds - ''How much is a two euro meal?'' - she's a solicitor now :pac:

ziedth · 06-11-2015 09:03PM

Went to the cinema with a girl I was chancing my arm with and her friend. Anyway the film was Terminator 3 and when it comes to the ending when Skynet basically nuke the world keep in mind this is the end of the film where two cyborgs beat the **** out of each other having travelled back in time anyway during the scene mentioned I hear her lean over to her friend and ask "did this really happen?" Hand on heart it was one of those moments it took about 5 seconds to register what she had said. I let out a little giggle but I was shaking with trying to hold in a big laugh.

Flint Fredstone · 06-11-2015 09:15PM

Medusa22 wrote: »

Another friend of mine when we were teenagers in McDonalds - ''How much is a two euro meal?'' - she's a solicitor now :pac:

Reminds me of a friend when we were kids buying sweets. "How much are the 4p mice?"

Another lad "Did you ever see your man Shane McGowan, big fúcking no teeth"

TheNobleKipper · 06-11-2015 09:22PM

Whilst in school when everybody was very much focused on getting their driving license sorted as soon as possible and people would discuss the theory test material:

"This sign means that blind people can park here"
"It means that it's a disabled space....so you would have answered that question wrong"
"No....it's just a space for blind people"
"If you're blind you can't drive"
"Blind people CAN drive! If someone misses one of their senses their other senses are super developed and they can drive by hearing"

Satts · 07-11-2015 01:34AM

Francie says to Tommy "Tommy, can you give me a loan of €10 ?"
"Sorry Francie, I only have €5 on me."
"Tommy, give me the €5 and you can owe me the other €5."

tigerboon · 07-11-2015 01:51AM

Kev W wrote: »

Also when the Scorpion King spinoff from the Mummy movies came out I overheard a guy who had somehow convinced himself that the movies had always been "Scorpion King" movies and could not get his head around why they had named the series "" The Scorpion King", "The Scorpion King Returns" and then "The Scorpion King" again.

You've lost me there.....after the "Also when.." bit

Mountainsandh · 07-11-2015 02:15AM

tayto lover wrote: »

Two girls taking aloud in the bus depot in Dundalk.

1." I see you got your new boots."
2. "Yeah, I tried 4 shops looking for them."
1. "Where did you get them?"
2. "In the last one."

I got up and rushed out before bursting into a mad bout of laughing.

I don't get this. Is this funny/stupid because she doesn't mention the name of the shop ? (she might have right after your eavesdropping btw)

As regards the plane seats, who's to say the girls just didn't like the row they were in and preferred the few rows up instead (while still having the convenience of an empty seat) ?

A lot of comments can be made fun of when taken out of context.

MilesMorales1 · 07-11-2015 02:23AM

“Just outside my carriage were two young Australians who spent the passage from Lausanne to Geneva discussing great brawls they had taken part in over the years. I couldn’t quite see them, but I could hear every breathless word. They would say things like, ‘D’ya remember the time Muscles Malloy beat the crap out of the Savage triplets with a claw hammer? There was blood and guts all over the place, man.’
‘I was picking pieces of brain out of my beer!’
‘Yeah, it was fan-tas-tic! D’ya remember that time Muscles rammed that snooker cue up Jason Brewster’s nose and it came out the top of his head?’
‘That Muscles was an animal, wasn’t he?’
‘Not half!’
‘Did you ever see him eat a live cat?’
‘No, but I saw him pull the tongue out of a horse once.’
It went on like this all the way to Geneva. These guys were serious psychopaths, in urgent need of a clinic. I kept expecting one of them to look in at me and say, ‘I’m bored. Let’s hang this asshole upside-down out the window and see how many times we can hit his head on the sleepers.
“ Eventually, I peeked out. They were both about four feet two inches tall and couldn’t have beaten up a midget in a blindfold. I followed them off the train at Geneva and out of the station, chattering excitedly as they went about people having their heads stuck in a waffle iron or their tongues nailed to the carpet.”

Excerpt From: Bryson, Bill. “Neither Here Nor There.”

Made me laugh

StupidLikeAFox · 07-11-2015 02:41AM

Satts wrote: »

Francie says to Tommy "Tommy, can you give me a loan of €10 ?"
"Sorry Francie, I only have €5 on me."
"Tommy, give me the €5 and you can owe me the other €5."

But sure in that case Tommy would owe Francie €5 and Francie would owe Tommy €5 so they may as well call it quits

bodhrandude · 07-11-2015 02:58AM

This American musician came to stay in Galway for a while, a brilliant guitarist and singer, one night he fancied a smoke of some hash, so myself and another mate procured some hash and we went up to the mates gaff where the American was also staying in a housing estate. Anyway after quite a few spliffs we were heading off somewhere else, the American guy called out from the first floor window to us in the street, "Hey man, thanks for getting me that hash."

Ol' Donie · 07-11-2015 03:03AM

In Chartbusters on the Navan Road a few years back now.

Woman goes to the counter with an Austin Powers DVD, rated 15.

"Excuse me, have yis got this in 12s?"

Really happened.

gerrybbadd · 07-11-2015 03:19AM

Friend of mine exclaimed one day that he could eat anything he wanted, and so long as he had a bottle of water with it, it wouldn't count nutritionally (like a burger for example, it'd do no harm as long as ya had water)

Rock77 · 07-11-2015 03:26AM

Mountainsandh wrote:

As regards the plane seats, who's to say the girls just didn't like the row they were in and preferred the few rows up instead (while still having the convenience of an empty seat) ?

Mountainsandh wrote:

A lot of comments can be made fun of when taken out of context.

Mountainsandh wrote:

I don't get this. Is this funny/stupid because she doesn't mention the name of the shop ? (she might have right after your eavesdropping btw)

Wow! Just wow.
Why would you even look at a thread like this if you are going to over analyse and take everything so seriously?
In my opinion most people had a giggle at both of those stories.

dd972 · 07-11-2015 03:31AM

The DUP's Gregory Campbell lauding a Tyrone All Ireland Final win as an 'international' football achievement.

This though actually happened, a Black chap I knew from college visited the U.S.A to visit his brother, and a woman overheard him speak and said (seriously!), ''you're Black... and your're English?!.....have you always been black?''

Padster90s · 07-11-2015 03:34AM

At a Luas stop. Junkie to a woman smoking: "Do you have a spare fag?" Woman: "No, the box only came with 20".

monkeynuz · 07-11-2015 03:35AM

Some years ago in a restaurant overhearing some very loud Americans wondering incredulously why there were pictures of Oscar Wilde in Ireland when he was "a famous American"

I didn't bother to say anything.

Mountainsandh · 07-11-2015 03:38AM

Rock77 wrote: »

Wow! Just wow.
Why would you even look at a thread like this if you are going to over analyse and take everything so seriously?
In my opinion most people had a giggle at both of those stories.

I giggle at some alright, just don't think these are very convincing. Not much entertainment otherwise for me. Not very fond of sniggering at nothing.

07-11-2015 10:53AM

Padster90s wrote: »

At a Luas stop. Junkie to a woman smoking: "Do you have a spare fag?" Woman: "No, the box only came with 20".

I'd call that one clever!

Saipanne · 07-11-2015 10:58AM

corner of hells wrote: »

Em , I still have a card that only works in B of I too.

What's the card number, 00000001?

fleet_admiral · 07-11-2015 11:01AM

Working in pubs is great for this

Once I heard a customer on the phone to a mate explain how another friend got done for drunk driving - 'They got him on the wine gums he had on the seat beside him'

sonny.knowles · 07-11-2015 11:05AM

Padster90s wrote: »

At a Luas stop. Junkie to a woman smoking: "Do you have a spare fag?" Woman: "No, the box only came with 20".

Anything that confuses a junkie is fine by me.

as_mo_bhosca · 07-11-2015 11:29AM

Padster90s wrote: »

At a Luas stop. Junkie to a woman smoking: "Do you have a spare fag?" Woman: "No, the box only came with 20".

That should surely be in a "The Best Things I've Overheard" thread. Great response.

The Sun King · 07-11-2015 11:43AM

Does sonny.knowles reaction earlier in this thread qualify?

Edit: boooo never mind.

LDN_Irish · 07-11-2015 12:00PM

Medusa22 wrote: »

Another friend of mine when we were teenagers in McDonalds - ''How much is a two euro meal?'' - she's a solicitor now :pac:

I'm from London originally and went to stay with family in Waterford for the first time about 20 years ago. Much amusement with everything I said for being not only a "townie" (it's actually a city, culchies) but English too. I'd never heard of a penny jelly and asked for twenty of them and then predictably asked "how much is that?" Rumour has it they're still talking about it now.

Samsgirl · 07-11-2015 12:08PM

Over heard in Tipperary -
And why are they taking tigers and what are they doing with them? Would they not get bitten by them.

In relation to the spate of tiger kidnappings in 2011

mightyreds · 07-11-2015 12:15PM

I'd a friend in a restaurant a few months ago, the waitress asked how he would like his steak and he said with chips. Not really stupid but funny all the same, he said he'd no idea what she was talking about.

Stupidest thing you've overheard?

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