Stupidest thing you've overheard?

Senior Spielbergo

Can be in public, at home, wherever.

I was in Waterford over the weekend and was walking behind two girls, one of which were just after using the ATM(Bank of Ireland)
When her friend says: "You're so lucky your bank machine is so close to town. I have to go searching everywhere for an AIB one"
Luckily her friend was as astounded as I was and was trying to tell her you can actually use your card in every machine!
She wasnt having any of it though!

Stupidest thing you've overheard?

Triangla

After the Euro changeover I heard a couple discuss how expensive things got.

The guy said he used to spend 50 Pounds on a night out but last night spent 70 Euro.

Akrasia

I was sitting in Supermacs in Gort one day and was in stitches as I listened to one dimwitted teenager tried to explain to his even stupider friend how time travel is actually possible.

Totally serious conversation

corner of hells

Senior Spielbergo wrote: »

Can be in public, at home, wherever.

I was in Waterford over the weekend and was walking behind two girls, one of which were just after using the ATM(Bank of Ireland)
When her friend says: "You're so lucky your bank machine is so close to town. I have to go searching everywhere for an AIB one"
Luckily her friend was as astounded as I was and was trying to tell her you can actually use your card in every machine!
She wasnt having any of it though!

Stupidest thing you've overheard?

How close behind these two girls were you ? And did you get their pin numbers ?

Dodge

Senior Spielbergo wrote: »

Luckily her friend was as astounded as I was and was trying to tell her you can actually use your card in every machine!
She wasnt having any of it though!

Up until a couple of years ago a friend of mine was with a particlar building society and his cards could only work with AIB and his own crowd. Can't think of name

corner of hells

Dodge wrote: »

Up until a couple of years ago a friend of mine was with a particlar building society and his cards could only work with AIB and his own crowd. Can't think of name

Em , I still have a card that only works in B of I too.

Senior Spielbergo

corner of hells wrote: »

How close behind these two girls were you ? And did you get their pin numbers ?

I was a few lengths behind them. Chung wans on nights out dont usually talk very quietly!

Duggy747

Sat on a bus in front of someone who was talking about satanic messages hidden in Disney music to corrupt children and how a promotional video for the hadron collidor featured ritualistic dancing that was evidence to show that they were planning on bringing the Anti-Christ to Earth.

Thought it was an oddly specific thing to say until I saw someone post the same thing Facebook a few days later.

DanielODonnell

It was on the wireless but that still counts as overhearing.
A woman rang into the Nolan show this year and said that Irish is a foreign language in Northern Ireland, despite most of the place names deriving from the language and it having being spoken in Ulster since before Christ.

The woman sounded like a middle class sort too, not some scally.

JustShon

In PC world one day, heard a woman loudly telling some poor staff member that her new computer has to have "Four RAMs of Gig." and then when corrected, insisted that it was definitely "Four RAMs of Gig."

I had to walk out before I started laughing.

Birneybau

"What's the whiffy code?"

Skylinehead

Birneybau wrote: »

"What's the whiffy code?"

We had a Spanish lad on our team say that, proper tech guy as well. Still laughed :pac:

BrianBoru00

DanielODonnell wrote: »

It was on the wireless but that still counts as overhearing.
A woman rang into the Nolan show this year and said that Irish is a foreign language in Northern Ireland, despite most of the place names deriving from the language and it having being spoken in Ulster since before Christ.

The woman sounded like a middle class sort too, not some scally.

In that case, I'd opt for the lady in the audience of the Late Late show attacking Gerry Adams claiming he had a "hidden agenda of a 32 county socialist republic"

Either himself or Gay Byrne brushed it off saying well if it was a hidden agenda, then we haven't done a very good job of it..

Raggaroo

I was in a shop that sells satellite dishes and free to air gear etc. A woman walks up to the counter and said she had phoned the shop as she was having trouble setting up her Satellite system and that she was told to bring the box to the shop and they would do the tuning there for her. She then handed the guy behind the counter the empty cardboard box that the tuner came in. When the guy asked her where the tuner was she said WELL YOU TOLD ME TO BRING IN THE BOX !

Whitewinged

Two women in the pub hovering over a phone and one telling the other to "turn on Google Chromosome".

PTH2009

Someone asking a friend is the movie 'straight out of Compton' scary

wilhelm roentgen

In Supervalu, Mallow.

The girl on one of the checkouts had an item that wouldn't scan, she calls to a colleague.

'Is this a 6 pack or a 24 pack of Stella'

Paramite Pie

I once overheard someone say (in the context of evolution) "that humans have disposable thumbs" (which sets them apart from chimps)...:pac:

How this conversation came up I don't know but the rest of her friends were still taking the piss after she left.

Huntergonzo

I was in my local welfare office about 6 years ago waiting at one of the windows and I heard a man at the windows beside me being asked 'when did you leave work?', '6 months ago' he said, so the woman asked him 'well what have you been doing ever since, why are you only signing on now?'......'well I've just been doing a few nixers you know yourself'......D'OH!!!

What a thing to say to someone in a welfare office, they called him into the back for an 'interview' after that, not sure what ever became of the poor aul divil, must have been kicking himself for saying the word nixers.

Kev W

I was working in a cinema when the second Blair Witch movie came out and a group were arguing with each other about whether the original was real or fake. One of them actually pointed to the poster for the new one and said "See, it's real! They made another one!"

Senior Spielbergo

Huntergonzo wrote: »

I was in my local welfare office about 6 years ago waiting at one of the windows and I heard a man at the windows beside me being asked 'when did you leave work?', '6 months ago' he said, so the woman asked him 'well what have you been doing ever since, why are you only signing on now?'......'well I've just been doing a few nixers you know yourself'......D'OH!!!

What a thing to say to someone in a welfare office, they called him into the back for an 'interview' after that, not sure what ever became of the poor aul divil, must have been kicking himself for saying the word nixers.

Oh dear! If that were my local welfare office he'd have been crucified!

Not over heard but back a few years ago when that 'Moves Like Jagger' song by Maroon 5 was all over the place, I was on a work night out and this song comes on.
One of the girls asked me:
'Whats a Jagger??' :O
Me: 'Mick Jagger'
She looks bewildered
Me: 'Rolling Stones?'
She shrugs and goes off for a dance.

She wouldnt be the type to be into that kind of music so I let her away with it!

namloc1980

DanielODonnell wrote: »

It was on the wireless but that still counts as overhearing.
A woman rang into the Nolan show this year and said that Irish is a foreign language in Northern Ireland, despite most of the place names deriving from the language and it having being spoken in Ulster since before Christ.

The woman sounded like a middle class sort too, not some scally.

How far did she get before Nolan started shouting over her?

shawnxxiong

Akrasia wrote: »

I was sitting in Supermacs in Gort one day and was in stitches as I listened to one dimwitted teenager tried to explain to his even stupider friend how time travel is actually possible.

Totally serious conversation

well in theory that is possible, maybe they are not stupid after all.

valoren

Younger brother (about 21 at the time) to my mother.

He had a credit union loan for a car and was getting looking to get a new loan.

"Mam, you know how I have a loan with the credit union? If I get another loan do I have to pay that one off?"

gramar

I was in the back row on a flight last week. Opposite were two girls and one empty seat. A couple of rows ahead there were 3 empty seats together.
One suggested moving there as there were 3 free seats. The other agreed and up they both got and moved.

ShowMeTheCash

Guy I work with once said "I think this is the oldest I've ever been."

I didn't really know how to respond as he sat there thinking about it.

Tzetze

A twitch streamer I like to watch for his gaming skills (not his science skills);
"So, me and my friend, we like to talk quantum physics for hours. Ok, so you know how time doesn't exist once you leave the Earth. Like time stops once you go out into space..." (If this is the premise, what follows can only induce rage)

/me switches off the stream

To Elland Back

Insurance colleague of mine had a client sit down in front of her and declare "I was told you could insure me if I brought in my licence, no claim bonus and registration number for the car"

He put 2 documents and the reg plate up on the desk

Canis Lupus

Skylinehead wrote: »

We had a Spanish lad on our team say that, proper tech guy as well. Still laughed :pac:

It's how they pronounce it in Spain and France. Asking for a 'y fi' code leaves them with blank faces.

Magico Gonzalez

Me, to a friend "would you light that (cigarette) or put it out"

BettePorter

In my local mace a few years ago and overheard the manager and cashier who had just arrived in for her shift ..... 'ah ' shes says 'when you said last night I was on ten to two today I thought you meant ten to two '!!! ( it was 2:50)

sonny.knowles

gramar wrote: »

I was in the back row on a flight last week. Opposite were two girls and one empty seat. A couple of rows ahead there were 3 empty seats together.
One suggested moving there as there were 3 free seats. The other agreed and up they both got and moved.

So they moved from seats that presumably didn't recline to seats that did recline, but still had the extra free seat to stretch their legs out or not be squashed by a fat person.

I can understand why you felt stupid.

Gwynplaine

In school, 6th class. Teacher asks. "What language do Eskimos speak?"
Fella puts up his hand. "Sure Eskimos can't talk"
Whole class fell around the place the laughing.

corner of hells

I worked as an electrician for about twenty years , sent an apprentice of to get me a piece of cable 10metres long .

As he walked off he shouted back to me " 10metres , corner ? "

Yeah , says I .

He arrived back with ten pieces of cable , a metre in length.

asherbassad

Senior Spielbergo wrote: »

Can be in public, at home, wherever.

I was in Waterford over the weekend and was walking behind two girls, one of which were just after using the ATM(Bank of Ireland)
When her friend says: "You're so lucky your bank machine is so close to town. I have to go searching everywhere for an AIB one"
Luckily her friend was as astounded as I was and was trying to tell her you can actually use your card in every machine!
She wasnt having any of it though!

Stupidest thing you've overheard?

I have a BOI savings account. It only works in Bank of Ireland Machines.
Some shops like random Spars have a BOI 365 machine but most don't.

It's possible that AIB also have an account that only dispenses from AIB machines. Nobody is that thick that they wouldn't try the card in another machine. NOBODY.

asherbassad

gramar wrote: »

I was in the back row on a flight last week. Opposite were two girls and one empty seat. A couple of rows ahead there were 3 empty seats together.
One suggested moving there as there were 3 free seats. The other agreed and up they both got and moved.

Oh no....they didn't, did they?

I wonder if the penny dropped when they sat down.

gramar

sonny.knowles wrote: »

So they moved from seats that presumably didn't recline to seats that did recline, but still had the extra free seat to stretch their legs out or not be squashed by a fat person.

I can understand why you felt stupid.

No Sonny, let me explain, they were in a row of 3 Ryanair seats (the non reclining ones) , two of which were occupied by them...the other was unoccupied and the doors were closed at this stage. They moved to another row of 3 Ryanair seats (also the non reclining ones) all unoccupied until they were sitting in them leaving behind a row of 3 empty seats.

gramar

asherbassad wrote: »

Oh no....they didn't, did they?

I wonder if the penny dropped when they sat down.

I don't know but it hasn't dropped for Sonny Knowles yet.

TrustedApple

In the old job on the menu we used to give you 3 options for what kind of pasta to have with your sauce.

Can i have the Spaghetti, Tagliatelle, Penne carbonara ?.

Sorry sir what pasta would you like with your carbonara ?.

The Spaghetti, Tagliatelle, Penne.

Sorry sir thats 3 different kinds of pasta what one would you like with your carbonara ?.

Whats the difference there all the same pasta.

Facepam.

Froggy123

In a costume shop around Halloween a guy was asking the shop assistant could he get some red contact lenses.

'No problem' says the shop assistant and hands him some.

The guy trying to buy them looked confused for a second and asked 'do you have any contacts that have a red centre with a white background?'

Shop assistant (looking visibly astonished) was like the white part is your actual eye.

sonny.knowles

gramar wrote: »

No Sonny, let me explain, they were in a row of 3 Ryanair seats (the non reclining ones) , two of which were occupied by them...the other was unoccupied and the doors were closed at this stage. They moved to another row of 3 Ryanair seats (also the non reclining ones) all unoccupied until they were sitting in them leaving behind a row of 3 empty seats.

Makes a bit more sense now, thanks gramar - not mentioning that both sets of seats are non reclining is a fairly major oversight, since you didn't mention the airline either, who were we to know that none of them reclined? Not sure how relevant the doors being closed is, but I would recommend proof reading theses sort of posts before posting.

I have sat at the last row on a flight only once, near the toilet, seat didn't recline etc, I would have moved had I had the opportunity.

sonny.knowles

Froggy123 wrote: »

In a costume shop around Halloween a guy was asking the shop assistant could he get some red contact lenses.

'No problem' says the shop assistant and hands him some.

The guy trying to buy them looked confused for a second and asked 'do you have any contacts that have a red centre with a white background?'

Shop assistant (looking visibly astonished) was like the white part is your actual eye.

Maybe he had pink or brown eye that eh wanted to hide.

sonny.knowles

gramar wrote: »

I don't know but it hasn't dropped for Sonny Knowles yet.

Funny guy - if you could tell a proper story it might help.

booooring!

Met a friend in the dole office when I was on the dole signing and said to him quite loudly "Are you working in the local tonight?" I knew he was getting cash in hand and nearly threw up when I said it. Ended up nothing been said about it thank christ!

gramar

sonny.knowles wrote: »

Funny guy - if you could tell a proper story it might help.

It was only you that needed the ladybird version. Log on to Boards Jr next time.

sonny.knowles

gramar wrote: »

It was only you that needed the ladybird version. Log on to Boards Jr next time.

Jesus, don't take it so badly, you told (or possibly made up) a poor story, no biggie. I'm sure you have other talents. Keep looking, you'll eventually discover them.

CageWager

American guy on a tram in San Diego ranting about the "goddam Indians coming over from Pakistan"

gramar

sonny.knowles wrote: »

Jesus, don't take it so badly, you told (or possibly made up) a poor story, no biggie. I'm sure you have other talents. Keep looking, you'll eventually discover them.

Troll on.

sonny.knowles

gramar wrote: »

Troll on.

Sorry, dude, I just called it like I saw it. Didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

Kev W

It's getting very "Mean Girls" in here altogether.

sonny.knowles

Kev W wrote: »

It's getting very "Mean Girls" in here altogether.

Yeah, commenting on someone else's stupidity while leaving yourself open to the same claim was never going to end well for our friend. Live and learn I suppose.