Smoking in the House

chops018 · 03-10-2015 03:09AM

pillphil wrote: »

Speaking as an ex smoker, none of that is true. Except the smell bit.

OP what do you mean by trainee? No wages at all?

Trainee Solicitor. And yes, no salary at all until next April, and even then it will be minimum wage so as I said I am stuck here for a while.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 03-10-2015 03:12AM

I'm a smoker and will always step outside to light up. It's ingrained in me as I took up the habit after the public ban was in place.

I actually can't stand the lingering smell tobacco leaves in a room for hours, anything I have a get together on my premises I insist that people smoke outside. I actually would become quite angry if somebody disobeyed that request.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 03:19AM

Tony EH wrote: »

To their credit, they were pretty sensible about it. plus, we had a place in our house where they could go and have a fag.

While it made living there a better situation, it didn't help them in the long run.

I'd much rather they just gave up and were still around.

Sorry i missed the end of your post where you said one of them died because of it, apologies

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 03:23AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I'm a smoker and will always step outside to light up. It's ingrained in me as I took up the habit after the public ban was in place.

I actually can't stand the lingering smell tobacco leaves in a room for hours, anything I have a get together r on my premises I insist that people smoke outside. I actually would become quite angry if somebody disobeyed that request.

And that's a very reasonable request and you would be fully entitled to get angry but that's your abode and your rules..... But not really pertinent to the current discussion...... While i agree wholeheartedly with the op about it being disgusting and ruins the smell in the house and all the clothes etc.... It is the ops parents house. They make the rules and regardless he should respect that. He doesn't HAVE to live there rather, he would like the home owners to change their lives to suit his. I think op needs to grow up a little.

Honestly op get a few vaping kits and a small selection of e liquids and ask them that they try it for one week for you. And promise them that if they give it a good go and are serious about it but choose after the week to go back to smoking you will no longer make an issue out of it. One of them will stick with it as it's surprisingly easy.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 03:46AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

No.... It's their house.
He is entitled to worry about them in terms of their health etc but not hassle them about their habits in their home regardless of if he likes or doesn't like it.

and his own health..damage from passive smoking is not a myth

kneemos · 03-10-2015 03:51AM

Don't get it's their house attitude in fairness. Sounds like the OP is a lodger.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 03:58AM

kneemos wrote: »

Don't get it's their house attitude in fairness. Sounds like the OP is a lodger.

yeah i dont like how people make assumptions that he is home freeloading his parents, even if that is the case, he is within his rights to make a stand about smoking in the house. His parents seem extremely selfish about the issue whatever way you look at it. Im becoming more of the opinion that smokers are inherently selfish people by nature who couldnt give a damn about their own health or anyone elses. i saw one of the most disgusting scenes recently in a car park when i saw a woman puffing a fag in the car with 4 young children in the car and none of the windows even rolled down. I felt like getting out of the car and smacking her

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:03AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

and his own health..damage from passive smoking is not a myth

I never said nor implied it was a myth..... If he is worried about the dangers of passive smoking he can move out.

Billy86 · 03-10-2015 04:05AM

Every smoker should be legally obliged to read Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking book.

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:07AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

yeah i dont like how people make assumptions that he is home freeloading his parents, even if that is the case, he is within his rights to make a stand about smoking in the house. His parents seem extremely selfish about the issue whatever way you look at it. Im becoming more of the opinion that smokers are I hi nherently selfish people by nature who couldnt give a damn about their own health or anyone elses. i saw one of the most disgusting scenes recently in a car park when i saw a woman puffing a fag in the car with 4 young children in the car and none of the windows even rolled down. I felt like getting out of the car and smacking her

Who made assumptions op was a freeloader? I don't think even a lodger has a say.... I know a licensee certainly hasn't.
I agree re smoking with kids in the car. Should be a criminal offence imo we all know the dangers so to inflict that on a helpless child is stupidity of the highest form.

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:08AM

Billy86 wrote: »

Every smoker should be legally obliged to read Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking book.

Why? Read it and it did nothing to me.... Like nothing perhaps made me smoke more.....

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 04:11AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

I never said nor implied it was a myth..... If he is worried about the dangers of passive smoking he can move out.

I wasnt attacking you or your post, i was just pointing out the fact as it sometimes gets ignored/forgotten re importance in these situations

Billy86 · 03-10-2015 04:14AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

Why? Read it and it did nothing to me.... Like nothing perhaps made me smoke more.....

The way it speaks to a smoker is completely different than almost anything else, and far more effective. It got me off the smokes (with the odd lapse here and there) and has got almost everyone I have shown it to quit, or at least lower their amount.

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:17AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

I wasnt attacking you or your post, i was just pointing out the fact as it sometimes gets ignored/forgotten re importance in these situations

But in this situation it isn't important.... Trying to guilt your parents over the dangers of passive smoking will only lead to one thing..... The op looking for somewhere new to live! Unless you were a smoker in the past you will never know the hold on you fags can have on a person. Its unreal. And don't for one second believe the ops parents don't know the dangers..... The y do and they feel it's worth it. Otherwise they would give up.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 04:17AM

Billy86 wrote: »

The way it speaks to a smoker is completely different than almost anything else, and far more effective. It got me off the smokes (with the odd lapse here and there) and has got almost everyone I have shown it to quit, or at least lower their amount.

its a clever book, very common sense. In many ways it tells smokers what they already know but dont want to admit. however many smokers will always find ways to convince themselves to smoke again

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:20AM

Billy86 wrote: »

The way it speaks to a smoker is completely different than almost anything else, and far more effective. It got me off the smokes (with the odd lapse here and there) and has got almost everyone I have shown it to quit, or at least lower their amount.

I understood what the author was trying to do. Repetition used constantly (looking back I do remember the taste of fags being rotten after I read it) but just didn't work for me. That's not to say it doesn't work. I too have lots of mates that it worked for (that's how I ended up on it)

It's online freely available to read on a laptop or phone that's how I read it.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 04:21AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

But in this situation it isn't important.... Trying to guilt your parents over the dangers of passive smoking will only lead to one thing..... The op looking for somewhere new to live! Unless you were a smoker in the past you will never know the hold on you fags can have on a person. Its unreal. And don't for one second believe the ops parents don't know the dangers..... The y do and they feel it's worth it. Otherwise they would give up.

yes i am an ex smoker, and i do know how tough it is to give up. But if was still smoking or if i ever did start smoking again the least i would do is to try not inflict my habit on other people, and definitley not those begging me not to smoke in their living space. thats just common decency

Billy86 · 03-10-2015 04:26AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

its a clever book, very common sense. In many ways it tells smokers what they already know but dont want to admit. however many smokers will always find ways to convince themselves to smoke again

Oh yeah it's far from bullet proof, but the whole "you WANT a smoke, you don't NEED one" as well as "you are a drug addict, just like a crack head or heroine junkie... or that guy in the office who insists he NEEDS his morning coffee" bits in particular, and how those points are made, are almost impossible to not stick with you if you have ever been a smoker.

He makes greats points on the awfulness of "cigarettes are killing you" ads as well, and how they make smokers feel bad. Because guess what smokers do when they feel bad or down... yep, light on up!

It's just a fascinating book imo, should be part of school curriculums in health-related classes if you ask me.

The Dogs Bollix · 03-10-2015 04:27AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

No.... It's their house.
He is entitled to worry about them in terms of their health etc but not hassle them about their habits in their home regardless of if he likes or doesn't like it.

So a grown aduld "child" has no right to an opinion in their home. Continue being treated like a child. They had a long enough child hood of taking rules, abuse and their parents opinions including their smoking. It's about time all people are treated like adults in the house.

Good luck with it OP. From someone who once got someone to smoke outside, they came back in the winter because it was too cold. It doesn't work.

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:32AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

yes i am an ex smoker, and i do know how tough it is to give up. But if was still smoking or if i ever did start smoking again the least i would do is to try not inflict my habit on other people, and definitley not those begging me not to smoke in their living space. thats just common decency

And I would be the same, NOW
As I know my clothes smell clean now (I can actually smell them hahaha) and I know that it's horrible to be around. But it's their home. Theirs. Why should they change the way they live to suit their son or even a lodger. (unless they rely on any money from rent then it IS a different story) it's their life, their house and their rules. They have raised a very intelligent kid (perhaps more than one) and have (I assume) smoked for years.

It is extremely unfair of the op to hassle them about it. You don't have to agree with their decision to smoke you don't have to support it (ie buy them smokes when in the shops etc) but you do have to respect that especially when living under their roof (paying or not). Otherwise op runs the risk of getting kicked out or even falling out with his family.

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 04:34AM

Billy86 wrote: »

Oh yeah it's far from bullet proof, but the whole "you WANT a smoke, you don't NEED one" as well as "you are a drug addict, just like a crack head or heroine junkie... or that guy in the office who insists he NEEDS his morning coffee" bits in particular, and how those points are made, are almost impossible to not stick with you if you have ever been a smoker.

He makes greats points on the awfulness of "cigarettes are killing you" ads as well, and how they make smokers feel bad. Because guess what smokers do when they feel bad or down... yep, light on up!

It's just a fascinating book imo, should be part of school curriculums in health-related classes if you ask me.

theres a lot of hidden meanings and pyschology throughout the book. he speaks in a very personal manner in the book to you so you are more likely to accept what he says and for it to resonate rather than some random guy lecturing you about how bad smoking is. but yeah its a useful to alot of people so he did a good deed in his life. I believe he died of lung cancer ironically enough

jamesbondings · 03-10-2015 04:40AM

The Dogs Bollix wrote: »

So a grown aduld "child" has no right to an opinion in their home. Continue being treated like a child. They had a long enough child hood of taking rules, abuse and their parents opinions including their smoking. It's about time all people are treated like adults in the house.

Good luck with it OP. From someone who once got someone to smoke outside, they came back in the winter because it was too cold. It doesn't work.

Exactly.... If he doesn't like it he can leave....

Stacksofwacks · 03-10-2015 04:42AM

jamesbondings wrote: »

And I would be the same, NOW
As I know my clothes smell clean now (I can actually smell them hahaha) and I know that it's horrible to be around. But it's their home. Theirs. Why should they change the way they live to suit their son or even a lodger. (unless they rely on any money from rent then it IS a different story) it's their life, their house and their rules. They have raised a very intelligent kid (perhaps more than one) and have (I assume) smoked for years.

It is extremely unfair of the op to hassle them about it. You don't have to agree with their decision to smoke you don't have to support it (ie buy them smokes when in the shops etc) but you do have to respect that especially when living under their roof (paying or not). Otherwise op runs the risk of getting kicked out or even falling out with his family.

he's not some random lodger, he's their son and they should show him more respect. Typical Irish parents taking their kids for granted. they probably would go outside for a smoke if a stranger was living in the house but they choose to poison their own kid on a daily basis and assume they have done so for years. he should move out if he's living with such self centered people

03-10-2015 04:55AM

Stacksofwacks wrote: »

he's not some random lodger, he's their son and they should show him more respect. Typical Irish parents taking their kids for granted. they probably would go outside for a smoke if a stranger was living in the house but they choose to poison their own kid on a daily basis and assume they have done so for years. he should move out if he's living with such self centered people

They're not some junkie strangers, he's their son, he's in their house, and he should show them more respect. Typical Irish son taking their parents for granted. They are doing something that's perfectly legitimate and allowed and he repays their hospitality by moaning about them on an anonymous forum and tolerating it as others cut his parents to pieces, calling them selfish, irresponsible etc. This entire thread says something ugly about someone in that house, it's not either of the parents.

evolving_doors · 03-10-2015 08:47AM

Dunno Connor74, who's gonna be picking up the pieces when either of them are hooked up to a respirator with emphysema.. or lung/throat cancer?
So theyre the ones who are going to be taking him for granted.

Although op, just remember nicotine is as addictive as heroin so you may as well be trying to talk a random junkie out of injecting.

You could try spiking their cigarettes with stuff! (in keeping with AH revenge protocol).

03-10-2015 09:26AM

chops018 wrote: »

So my parents smoke in the house. Like troopers.

yada yada yada
(sorry, just to remove the unimportant bits)

Any tips to resolve this?

Two choices OP

a) Pony up for your own crib, at which point you can hang all the "no smoking" signs you damn well please all over the place,

or

b) Walk around nude every time one of your folks sparks up a fag. Get some sympathetic friends to join you to make this option more effective.

03-10-2015 09:36AM

Gebgbegb wrote: »

Dunno Connor74, who's gonna be picking up the pieces when either of them are hooked up to a respirator with emphysema.. or lung/throat cancer?

Oh true. Or they could get a heart attack brought on by what they eat and drink, or be hit by a bus, or even a stroke from the stress of years of raising a child who then invites anonymous people to make critical judgements of them on the internet.

Of course smoking influences health and makes certain outcomes more likely. But the OP spends far more time referring to the effect on his clothes, I see only one reference to the health issues, buried in the last line of the first post. I hope they're not banking on him!

MarkAnthony · 03-10-2015 09:36AM

+1 on trying to get them vaping.

My mother has been smoking for 50+ years. She smoked when she was pregnant (late 70s early 80s), she smoked when we were kids. Nothing, but nothing would get her to stop but to her credit she started going outside when I would visit (maybe twice a year).

She started vaping for some reason best known to herself and within a week the cigs were gone. I know vaping may have it's own risks but to me the change is a positive one and everything (tax wise etc) should be done to encourage it as an alternative.

Mesrine65 · 03-10-2015 11:05AM

2 against 1, you lose OP

Dr.Internet · 03-10-2015 11:12AM

Their house, their rules. If you want your own rules get your own house. They are providing you with accomadation and you sound very ungrateful trying to bully them out of their own home so you can be more comfortable.

Talk about entitlement.

Smoking in the House

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