Weirdest thing your housemate has done?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 26-08-2015 02:23PM

scrimshanker wrote: »

Why didn't you try to find the dog's rightful owner?

Jesus there's always one of these on these threads. Why would you assume I didn't? I'm hardly still looking after the fecking thing

Generic Dreadhead · 26-08-2015 02:27PM

I sat down on a toilet that had the seat left up by a careless male; Me. In 34 years on this planet (for nearly 17 of which I have habitually used a toilet) I have never done this.

I don't want this guy speaking on behalf of us males tbh.

Man was an adult before he was out of nappies

Lingua Franca wrote: »

Then there's the fact that especially once you've had a kid or two you don't get much warning at all that you need the loo combined with our urethras being much shorter than those of men, which adds up to sometimes running in with barely enough time to get our trousers and knickers down before spinning super fast to sit down. If the seat is up we're going to end up in the bowl risking a urinary tract infection whilst trying not to piss ourselves.

You are literally the Anti-Craic :pac:

Lingua Franca · 26-08-2015 03:03PM

Cormac... wrote: »

I don't want this guy speaking on behalf of us males tbh.

Man was an adult before he was out of nappies

You don't know his circumstances, he could have taken a decade off in his 20's.

You are literally the Anti-Craic :pac:

I know. But I'm very pro-crack, especially my own.

uch · 26-08-2015 03:32PM

Caught a fella in London sniffing another Housemate's girlfriends knickers one day when I was home a bit early, thing was this lad was actually great craic and seemed sound, so not sure if he staged it for my benefit.

the_monkey · 26-08-2015 04:41PM

Plastik wrote: »

Also had a guy that was a bit of a toilet seat and floor dribbler. Would never ever clean it up. He would also hang in the bathroom what seemed to be the only towel he owned. So I proceeded to wipe up his wazz with his own towel any time I came across it and he proceeded to keep drying himself with his own wazz encrusted towel after each shower.

The towel was never washed or anything. I had to eventually stop using it as became too afraid to touch it.

Just as scummy a thing to do tbh..

Summer wind · 26-08-2015 06:18PM

One house I shared with 3 other girls. The first thing one of them said to me was "don't worry if you hear me screaming, I'm just going upstairs to wax my thighs"

Nodin · 26-08-2015 06:30PM

Lingua Franca wrote: »

You don't know his circumstances, he could have taken a decade off in his 20's.

I know. But I'm very pro-crack, especially my own.

If something something something, Jesus wouldn't have made cranberry juice.

RaRaRasputin · 26-08-2015 07:08PM

Not sure where to even start..

Didn't happen to me but a friend used to lived with a housemate for years, and he used to be ok until he decided that it was a great idea to try out drugs, mainly because he can't/ couldn't do anything in moderation. I think the sh1t really hit the fan when my friend found speed in the fridge in the shared vegetable drawer because he had decided that it needed to be chilled. Unfortunately the same food was used for the lunches in work so the discovery caused some dissatisfaction. He also started to be much more open about his wide array of sex toys (and I think he had more than many a sex shop I have seen), so he decided to introduce a "bathing session" in which all of his anal plugs had to be soaked in soapy water in the communal bathroom sink.

There was another big fight about smoking fish in the living room ...ah I will stop now, everybody hates long posts.

sunnysoutheast · 26-08-2015 07:56PM

I shared a (dump of a) house briefly in Haringey in the early 90s.

A new housemate - a Kiwi motorbike courier - moved in to the box room one weekend. About 3AM on the Sunday morning we were all awoken by crashing, banging and swearing. He was trying to wheel his motorbike up the stairs to his room. He didn't stay long.

26-08-2015 08:09PM

RaRaRasputin wrote: »

I think the sh1t really hit the fan when my friend found speed in the fridge in the shared vegetable drawer because he had decided that it needed to be chilled.

I ink he was confusing his speed with chill out drugs...

Ineedaname · 26-08-2015 09:28PM

I shared a house with a fella who had just moved out of his parents house. One day he told me we needed to get bigger bins. When I queried this he informed me our current bins were full. When I explained that they needed to be emptied I was met with confusion and sheer bewilderment that had to be seen to be believed.

fuzzypickle · 26-08-2015 10:02PM

A guy I know nipped out one evening to get some milk and a few bits and bobs at a shop nearby and came back to find his housemate bollock-naked shagging the sofa.
Cue lots of girlish screaming and "Jesus Christ!" and not knowing where to look.

The guy thought he'd gone out for the night and wouldn't be back for a few hours. Have to wonder if this was going on every time he was alone in the house. Ugh!

jamesbere · 26-08-2015 10:53PM

fuzzypickle wrote: »

A guy I know nipped out one evening to get some milk and a few bits and bobs at a shop nearby and came back to find his housemate bollock-naked shagging the sofa.
Cue lots of girlish screaming and "Jesus Christ!" and not knowing where to look.

The guy thought he'd gone out for the night and wouldn't be back for a few hours. Have to wonder if this was going on every time he was alone in the house. Ugh!

Hope he wore protection

sinead88 · 26-08-2015 11:59PM

I live in a 6 bed flat, so I've lived with more than my fair share of weirdos, as well as lovely people of course. One of my ex flatmates used to collect all of the rent and bills from us, before paying it on to the various places it had to go. It turned out that he was collecting council tax (I live in Scotland) from all of us for years but had never paid it on. We all started getting letters from the council saying that we owed them about 9000 pounds, and all of our names were on the bill so we were accountable. He was just intercepting them all and hiding them from us for ages. In the end, I opened a letter from a debt collection agency saying that they were about to suspend all of our bank accounts and take the payments. He never even admitted to guilt. He said that he was just saving all of our money to pay it off in one lump sum and came up with these bizarre excuses. We ended up having to contact his mother to pay the debts. It turned out that he was a serious gambling addict and lost all of our rent money at the casino on a couple of occasions too. He was really violent with his girlfriend in our flat too.
Another ex flatmate had serious mental health issues aswell. She used to wake us all up in the middle of the night by screaming and slamming doors and stuff. Her ex boyfriend lived across the road from us and she used to go absolutely mental and throw jars of pasta sauce, as well as heavy glass photo frames across the street at him and stuff. She ended up losing her job cos she was stoned all the time, and became an escort/ internet porn sensation. She was friends with these 2 massive, terrifying drug dealers who were feuding with each other too. We were genuinely worried there would be some sort of stand off in the flat. I've had other weirdos, but those are the most extreme. Sorry for the essay by the way!

aidoh · 27-08-2015 12:06AM

RaRaRasputin wrote: »

Not sure where to even start..

Didn't happen to me but a friend used to lived with a housemate for years, and he used to be ok until he decided that it was a great idea to try out drugs, mainly because he can't/ couldn't do anything in moderation. I think the sh1t really hit the fan when my friend found speed in the fridge in the shared vegetable drawer because he had decided that it needed to be chilled. Unfortunately the same food was used for the lunches in work so the discovery caused some dissatisfaction. He also started to be much more open about his wide array of sex toys (and I think he had more than many a sex shop I have seen), so he decided to introduce a "bathing session" in which all of his anal plugs had to be soaked in soapy water in the communal bathroom sink.

There was another big fight about smoking fish in the living room ...ah I will stop now, everybody hates long posts.

At the risk of sounding like a square: what's fish?

sammyjo90 · 27-08-2015 12:06AM

lived with a nightmare of a guy about 2 years ago in galway. very noisy, no regard for anyone who was asleep at all.

Came home at 2 in the morning during the week and made a sh!t tonne of noise dragging the kitchen table across the floor and then something across the drive.
So I go down to find him with a gigantic shelving unit. I ask him wtf did he think he was doing and I get back "What? I thought you would like it! I bought it from mayo!"
an onslaught of abuse from him happened after that because I reacted inappropriately so I moved out not long after!

The Randy Riverbeast · 27-08-2015 01:20AM

aidoh wrote: »

At the risk of sounding like a square: what's fish?

I thought the guy was preparing fish as in the animal. Never thought it could be a drug!

Xenji · 27-08-2015 01:29AM

One had a habit of sleepwalking naked and then sleeping in the bathtub, the first night we realized it my other housemate went to the jacks and did not turn on the light, he was sitting on the bowl when the sleepwalking roommate sprung up from the bath, took the shower curtain with him, draped it over his shoulders and proclaimed he was Batman, luckily the other roommate was still on the bowl as he was scared ****less.

TerrorFirmer · 27-08-2015 03:44AM

I think I'm the ****ty housemate, tried to open a bottle of my housemates wine the other night with a corkscrew, it kept getting stuck, and the cork just seemed to be made of the most delicate substance ever that the screw kept coming loose, eventually had to take a knife to it and carve it open.

Following morning turned out to be a screw cap.

philstar · 28-08-2015 10:15AM

KatW4 wrote: »

At night , he would hang out in the bathroom for over an hour without the light on. We couldn't hear him use the shower or anything so god knows what he was at.

at a guess...pulling his wire?

Birneybau · 28-08-2015 10:19AM

aidoh wrote: »

At the risk of sounding like a square: what's fish?

The mad shagger was probably smoking cod. It's very addictive. : D

endacl · 28-08-2015 10:26AM

jamesbere wrote: »

Couldnt he not climb out the window

Yes.

conor8989 · 28-08-2015 10:33AM

ash777 wrote: »

We got a new housemate a few weeks ago. Suffice to say, given the title of the thread, he's fairly weird. I can't type out all the sh*te he's pulled over the past few weeks, because I don't know if he goes on Boards.

But, I've just come from the bathroom to find the bathroom seat up (annoying, but not that annoying), and, when I put it down, there were drops of liquid (either water or pee) all over the seat. That didn't get there from peeing with the seat up, and hitting the seat - they were far too central on the seat. I don't know if that's understandable. But, probably took some effort? It wouldn't surprise me at all at this stage if he urinated on the seat, then put the seat up, just to leave a disgusting, urine 'surprise' for the next person to go to use the loo.

Ugh.

He's the most disgusting creature.

You have to nip this in the bud tell him casually or try to make a joke about it in passing but if hes like this just after moving in god only knows what he will be like when he gets settled id keep an eye on his room aswell i dont think it will be kept tidy

KatW4 · 28-08-2015 10:47AM

philstar wrote:

at a guess...pulling his wire?

Probably but he seemed like the type of guy who wouldn't bother...

Conall Cernach · 28-08-2015 11:25AM

I once shared a house with four others 2 of which were a couple. Eventually the girl got pregnant, fair enough says you. However, yer man still went out on the town with the rest of us while she was at home in bed. One night I headed off home early and left him in a club. The next morning I got up to find him on the settee with another girl. His own 6/7 month pregnant girlfriend was in the bathroom upstairs. Another housemate had to run intercept to keep the girlfriend talking upstairs while I encouraged yer man to see this girl out the door. She turned up the next day looking him again but luckily the girlfriend wasn't there.

Bummer1234 · 28-08-2015 11:43AM

A new lad moved into our apartment in replace of a student who was going to another city to work, He was grand at the start but 2 or 3 weeks in he started to stay with himself more,He would stay in his room all day and night..Which was ok to us,
But then I noticed after i went to bed he would then get up and watch the tv until 4 or 5 in the morning, Then after awhile he started texting me saying the house was turning into a mess...It was the very same as it was the day he moved in. Had us very puzzled, Then he started putting up a cleaning sheet on the wall to keep the place clean, We said ok to this as the house didn't really require that much cleaning,

Then the day came when he said he was moving out...That involved a drink on its own so myself and the other housemate hit the town and came home late, We came in at 4-4.30am that night,Then we could here the tv been turned off/muted and him sprinting to his room(wooded flooring).

Then it came to getting a replacement, He wanted us the be happy about who he wanted to replace him but what he did was awkward as f**k, He brought the two potential tenants around at about the same time...We didn't mind as long as they weren't crazy and able to pay rent. We choose one and she was lovely, Glad to have gotten rid of the other idiot.

Old Jakey · 28-08-2015 12:34PM

A manic depressive who was convinced we were stealing off him. Had to get the landlord to kick him out.

Mesrine65 · 28-08-2015 01:20PM

sunnysoutheast wrote: »

I shared a (dump of a) house briefly in Haringey in the early 90s.

A new housemate - a Kiwi motorbike courier - moved in to the box room one weekend. About 3AM on the Sunday morning we were all awoken by crashing, banging and swearing. He was trying to wheel his motorbike up the stairs to his room. He didn't stay long.

Living in a squat in London in the early 80's, me & a Scottish biker called Filthy Frank McGoo claimed the basement in this fantastic Georgian period house.

We decided to build a trike (3 wheeled motorcycle), pharmaceuticals were involved, took us 3-4 months, great job :cool:

Wasn't until it was completed that we realised, 'how the fúck are we going to get it out of the room?'

:pac: :pac: :pac:

ash777 · 29-08-2015 12:35AM

conor8989 wrote: »

You have to nip this in the bud tell him casually or try to make a joke about it in passing but if hes like this just after moving in god only knows what he will be like when he gets settled id keep an eye on his room aswell i dont think it will be kept tidy

Thanks. I've had to have stern words with him already, I'm not going to talk to him personally about dodgy drips of God knows what on the toilet seat, but, I'm not the only one appalled by his behaviour! :mad:

ash777 · 29-08-2015 12:37AM

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

I think I'm the ****ty housemate, tried to open a bottle of my housemates wine the other night with a corkscrew, it kept getting stuck, and the cork just seemed to be made of the most delicate substance ever that the screw kept coming loose, eventually had to take a knife to it and carve it open.

Following morning turned out to be a screw cap.

:P How many bottles had you already had?!

Weirdest thing your housemate has done?

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