do you talk/bitch about people behind their backs?

Robsweezie · 13-07-2015 09:55PM #1

how often would have a good bitch about people when they're not around, if at all? or do you think its better to say nothing at all if you've **** all nice to say? that would my approach, I honestly feel like less of a person if I catch myself tearing into someone who isn't there to defend themselves, so in general I don't. I just listen to it and try to stay neutral unless this person has completely pissed me off.

should this just be accepted as human nature, that people will talk regardless of what you do? have you ever caught someone running you down to others?

it puts me off people to see that side of them even though you're not the subject of the gossip. if they talk about others to you, they'll snipe about you to others.

0byme75341jo28 · 13-07-2015 09:58PM

A bitching session is mad craic in fairness.

fryup · 13-07-2015 10:00PM

of course i do, i'm irish

Arsemageddon · 13-07-2015 10:00PM

Ya I know, Robsweezie is such a total gobshi..............

Oh, Hi Rob, How are you? Haven't seen you in ages, we must go for a pint or something.

thee glitz · 13-07-2015 10:01PM

It's much easier to see fault in others than yourself and having a good old bitch helps get over any guilt you may have over personal failings. That said, I don't often do it since I realised this.

humberklog · 13-07-2015 10:07PM

u ok hun?

Robsweezie · 13-07-2015 10:11PM

humberklog wrote: »

u ok hun?

ah ye just some ****in dopes runnin der mouths thinkin der all smartt! all talk is all

snakes

(( anyway sure im gettin me wash cut an blow job tomrro so looking forward te dat, a lady has too treate herself

))) you goin wrights hun????

Ruu · 13-07-2015 10:12PM

you look fab! xxx

thee glitz · 13-07-2015 10:13PM

I'm grand up here

The Dogs Bollix · 13-07-2015 10:13PM

Robsweezie wrote: »

how often would have a good bitch about people when they're not around, if at all? or do you think its better to say nothing at all if you've **** all nice to say? that would my approach, I honestly feel like less of a person if I catch myself tearing into someone who isn't there to defend themselves, so in general I don't. I just listen to it and try to stay neutral unless this person has completely pissed me off.

should this just be accepted as human nature, that people will talk regardless of what you do? have you ever caught someone running you down to others?

it puts me off people to see that side of them even though you're not the subject of the gossip. if they talk about others to you, they'll snipe about you to others.

I've the same attitude. Whatever about bitching to your face. It's worse when you walk in on people bitching about you. Or overhear them bitching about you.

Sir Osis of Liver. · 13-07-2015 10:15PM

Much more fun to call them cnuts to their faces.

retro:electro · 13-07-2015 10:23PM

No because I have no friends to bitch to or about

Dr. Zaius Dr. Zaius! · 13-07-2015 10:33PM

Its natural to want to rant and let off a bit of steam if somebody is annoying you. Not necessarily to their face though.

You go away, have a rant and come back and get on with things. I dont think the world would be a better place if everyone said what they thought of eachother to the other persons face.

cloud493 · 13-07-2015 10:40PM

Nope. Never ever. This is a small country and I live in a small village in a relatively small city, you bitch to one person and suddenly everyone knows. **** that ****.

KomradeBishop · 13-07-2015 10:41PM

Generally I dislike it, and feel uncomfortable talking about someone when they aren't there to defend themselves.

People who do it are usually quite two-faced, though the worst are the ones who do it in deliberate hearing distance, to take a passive-aggressive dig at someone they have an issue with.

These people will rarely speak directly about the problem, and will often deny having an issue if you call them out on this - so you can't even directly call them out on this yourself - making it particularly cúntish behaviour.
There's no excuse for taking passive-aggressive digs at someone, while refusing to be direct about addressing the problem you have with them (yes, I'm talking about you! :pac:).

ben.schlomo · 13-07-2015 10:41PM

Yes, yes i do, but not you OP.

Greenmachine · 13-07-2015 10:46PM

Depends if someone would being a prize dick, or acting the maggot or whatever, and carried on even after they were told it was inappropriate etc: I might vent to someone who would likely deal with the same type of behavior from said person. Would complain to someone else without raising it with the perpetrator. If they take on board what is said, it will likely go no further.

Medusa22 · 14-07-2015 08:44AM

I'm not the best with confrontation and I am often unsure if I have a right to be annoyed or if I'm being oversensitive. I also can't stand it if someone is annoyed with me. So, I deal with this by bitching and venting my frustration about the person with someone else and it helps me to let it go. Otherwise I let things fester and become very resentful and then I explode. Well, I also have to admit that bitching about someone else makes me feel better about my own shortcomings.

anncoates · 14-07-2015 08:58AM

Anybody that says they don't occasionally vent or complain about some people behind their backs is lying. As in complaining about something that's bothering or annoying you, not making snide remarks for the sake of it.

It's only an issue if you're continually trashing somebody to the extent that it becomes hypocritical not to tell them personally or just to dump them.

Menas · 14-07-2015 09:07AM

Sure who does not like a good old bitching session. Keeps the world around.
I would be disappointed to discover that no one bitched about me behind my back.

katana1 · 14-07-2015 09:11AM

When I was younger..yes I would...As I got older I saw that people being nice to each other and then stabbing them in the back when not around.
Logically they were probably doing the same to me.
If I have an issue with someone I say it to them.
I have worked from offices to site work and it's everywhere.
I have people that stopped talking to me because I don't talk about anyone in a negative way.I, as I said say it to them.
Some people respect me for this others don't but honestly I feel better in myself knowing that I can never have anyone thinking that I back bite.
I am thick skinned and if I am told that anyone is talking about me ..I don't care..as the saying goes..they are leaving someone else alone.
Apologies for the drawn out post.

Sam Kade · 14-07-2015 09:14AM

I visited some of my in laws during the week and they always bitch about everyone else, you could stay until the early hours listening to them. Unfortunately on last weeks visit they bitched about no one and the night was dead boring, so boring that we left early :mad:

zeffabelli · 14-07-2015 09:14AM

KomradeBishop wrote: »

Generally I dislike it, and feel uncomfortable talking about someone when they aren't there to defend themselves.

People who do it are usually quite two-faced, though the worst are the ones who do it in deliberate hearing distance, to take a passive-aggressive dig at someone they have an issue with.

These people will rarely speak directly about the problem, and will often deny having an issue if you call them out on this - so you can't even directly call them out on this yourself - making it particularly cúntish behaviour.
There's no excuse for taking passive-aggressive digs at someone, while refusing to be direct about addressing the problem you have with them (yes, I'm talking about you! :pac:).

Yeah I generally agree with this, but also I think people need to release the emotional discharge to someone else to get it out of their system so they can talk to the original irritant more rationally.

But I have also sat in kitchens and listened to the most irresponsible passing of gossip and backstabbing and all it indictes to me is not to trust that person with any information outside of the weather forecast.

14-07-2015 09:45AM

We all do to some extent.

If I know something to be true, I might comment. Say if a friend of mine was involved in a fight in a pub, I might later say that was silly.

I don't engage in idle speculation or rumour. If someone starts with a "they heard such and such" about a friend, I will usually point out that most stories of that nature are completely made up.

OiL RiG · 14-07-2015 10:56AM

Menas wrote: »

Sure who does not like a good old bitching session. Keeps the world around.
I would be disappointed to discover that no one bitched about me behind my back.

"The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about."

Personally, I never bitch or whine about people behind their back. It's cowardly and seems like a shallow attempt to recoup your self-respect at the expense of someone else. I don't like hearing others do it and especially don't like it being done about myself.

Then again, maybe I'm just using this thread to have a go at these people behind their backs.

bnt · 14-07-2015 11:08AM

I try not to, but I work in an office with a small number of people of genuinely low intelligence, and the rest of us can't resist the occasional incredulous whinge about them.

Wacker The Attacker · 14-07-2015 11:14AM

Yes but I prefer to kick them in the face

DEFTLEFTHAND · 14-07-2015 11:14AM

Everyday.

eamonnq · 14-07-2015 11:16AM

Sam Kade wrote: »

I visited some of my in laws during the week and they always bitch about everyone else, you could stay until the early hours listening to them. Unfortunately on last weeks visit they bitched about no one and the night was dead boring, so boring that we left early :mad:

There were great stories about you as soon as you left though!!

Sam Kade · 14-07-2015 01:16PM

eamonnq wrote: »

There were great stories about you as soon as you left though!!

I knew that I'd get that reply.

Mesrine65 · 14-07-2015 01:21PM

Don't do passive/aggressive...I'd rather call someone a cúnt to their face or tell them to go fúck themselves.

At least both parties know where they stand with each other.

Failing that, 'nothing good to say, say nothing' works for me.

do you talk/bitch about people behind their backs?

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