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When life screwed you?

  • 07-02-2015 01:39AM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭


    Ever a time when life just royally screwed you over? Could be an interesting thread so I'll start.

    Cancer! Through no fault of my own I believe (so the doctors tell me)!

    Anyone else feel hard done by life?


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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,730 ✭✭✭Sheep Lover


    When my straw doesn't go into Capri Sun first time


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    When my straw doesn't go into Capri Sun first time

    Or when it goes through the other side :( hate that's shît man!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    When my usb stick wont fit in.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    CJ Haughey wrote: »
    When my usb stick wont fit in.

    That's actually a superpower I possess! Get it right every time!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31 big.bird84


    You're making a fry and when you're cracking the egg into the pan the yolk breaks so ya can't have a proper runny egg. FML!!


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Luke92 wrote: »
    That's actually a superpower I possess! Get it right every time!

    A micro usb fits the port either way, I have a big one.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,011 ✭✭✭Tugboats


    Every morning when I wake up and see my pig of a girlfriend lying beside me.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Every morning when I wake up and see my pig of a girlfriend lying beside me.

    Says Romeo himself :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Every morning when I wake up and see my pig of a girlfriend lying beside me.

    Thankfully I hit above my weight in the girlfriend department so I'm lucky :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    CJ Haughey wrote: »
    A micro usb fits the port either way, I have a big one.

    Micro USB as in for smart phones? They're two sided are they not?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 52 ✭✭Oyva bigwan


    When my poo doesn't drop straight down and hits the side of the bowl


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    When my poo doesn't drop straight down and hits the side of the bowl

    That is a symptom of constipation.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,166 ✭✭✭Tasden


    When you pour a cup of tea and then realise the milk is gone sour.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 52 ✭✭Oyva bigwan


    CJ Haughey wrote: »
    That is a symptom of constipation.

    Nothing wrong with my BM's I go 2-3 times a day


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    When my poo doesn't drop straight down and hits the side of the bowl

    I aim to wipe it off when pîssing! And what you're saying is often called "painting the toilet bowl".


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Nothing wrong with my BM's I go 2-3 times a day

    2-3 times a day is excessive unless you live in macdonalds?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 583 ✭✭✭HardenendMan


    When my poo doesn't drop straight down and hits the side of the bowl

    Or when you're done, and go for the first ass wipe, and there is actually excessive excrement on the tissue, requiring a further 20 wipes and an unplanned shower.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    Or when you're done, and go for the first ass wipe, and there is actually excessive excrement on the tissue, requiring a further 20 wipes and an unplanned shower.

    Just fold the paper 20 times over


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Luke92 wrote: »
    Micro USB as in for smart phones? They're two sided are they not?

    Meant to say a micro usb fits a big usb either way.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,740 ✭✭✭the evasion_kid


    Luke92 wrote: »
    Just fold the paper 20 times over

    Would be like wiping your ass with an LSD tab by the end of it


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 723 ✭✭✭Luke92


    CJ Haughey wrote: »
    Meant to say a micro usb fits a big usb either way.

    Yeah but then its useless.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 583 ✭✭✭HardenendMan


    Luke92 wrote: »
    Just fold the paper 20 times over

    Oh I am a folder all right, paper is expensive! But you can get caught out, one fold too many and you actually get poop on your hand. I verbally abuse life when that happens.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Luke92 wrote: »
    Yeah but then its useless.

    U feel screwed then.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,011 ✭✭✭Tugboats


    Does anyone smell the toilet paper after a wipe or is it just me?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,563 ✭✭✭dd972


    Been trying for the last 23 years to get into a certain line of work, one that's autonomous and very well remunerated, and constantly receive knockbacks, failing the tests and interviews by the skin of my teeth, passed some of the tests last year only to be told that the company's pass mark was higher but the results were an industry pass. Another company acknowledged the test results but told me after their interview I'd marginally hadn't got through. Still trying though.

    Especially galling though is that a couple of lads I knew only decided to try this line of work because I'd told them about it, they went straight in and have been on about €60K a year for the last 20 odd years, no begrudgery to them individually but this issue isn't so much a monkey on my back more like the global primate populace. :mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 387 ✭✭berger89


    Luke92 wrote: »
    Ever a time when life just royally screwed you over? Could be an interesting thread so I'll start.

    Cancer! Through no fault of my own I believe (so the doctors tell me)!

    Anyone else feel hard done by life?

    ^^don't mean this insensitively but hope you're doing well :) you definitely got fcuked over :/


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,471 ✭✭✭Anesthetize


    Tasden wrote: »
    When you pour a cup of tea and then realise the milk is gone sour.
    Or when you pour a cup of tea and realise there's no cup :(


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 449 ✭✭CJ Haughey


    Luke92 wrote: »
    I aim to wipe it off when pîssing! And what you're saying is often called "painting the toilet bowl".

    Having a semi helps to power wash it off.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 583 ✭✭✭HardenendMan


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Does anyone smell the toilet paper after a wipe or is it just me?

    Eh...no.

    But I do have a Dutch oven after a dirty curry fart!!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,037 ✭✭✭Plazaman


    On a busy street I was kissing a gorgeous girl when an ex of mine decided to wander up and tell drunken tales (92.67% of them were lies).


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