Small mistakes you've made in the past that make you cringe.

BetterThanThou · 05-02-2015 12:58PM #1

Pretty much, just small mistakes you've made in the past that make you cringe and think of how idiotic they were now.
One that I occasionally think of is my first time using a cigarette machine in a bar, this was after the tokens came in, I had always assumed you paid for the token and the cigarettes at the bar, I went up and handed the barwoman a 20 and asked for a token for the cigarette machine, she handed me back a fiver and some change, I had already had quite a few, so I wasn't concerned with counting or even looking at the change, I figured it was only a fiver, and I had paid a tenner for the token and threw it in my pocket. So I went up to the cigarette machine, put the token in, made my selection, nothing came out. So I went back up to the barwoman and said this, and she informs me that I have to put the token as well as money, I count the change and realize she had just given me change of my 20. Seems pretty obvious, considering the fact that various cigarettes are different prices, and have the prices right in front of you in LED lights. Always makes me cringe when I think back to that.

Tilly · 05-02-2015 01:00PM

The past? There's a video of me dancing at a wedding a few weeks ago on my own like a loon for an entire song, i was even making up dance moves. My life is cringe!!!

AgileMyth · 05-02-2015 01:01PM

I work in a pub in Belgium and the locals are constantly perplexed by the fag machine. Every day you have to show someone how it works.

That said, Belgians are pretty thick at the best of times. So don't be feeling better about yourself!!

They've also yet to figure out the smoking ban. People light up in the pub on a daily basis. Its not like its a new thing here..

gerrybbadd · 05-02-2015 01:03PM

Fell for a Nigerian scam. Sent off an iPad I was trying to sell, having received emails from "PayPal", confirming that payment was pending.

What a fool I was!

whiskeyman · 05-02-2015 01:04PM

Voted for FF in my early youth...

In fairness, it was Tiger time, and nearly everyone was!

The Backwards Man · 05-02-2015 01:05PM

At a motorway service station years ago, Hilton Park or Keele maybe;

Server; Would you like peas or beans?
Me; Aye.

Morto to this day.

Wacker The Attacker · 05-02-2015 01:06PM

Looking back at some of the munters I've banged over the years is amazingly cringeworthy

Wacker The Attacker · 05-02-2015 01:07PM

whiskeyman wrote: »

Voted for FF in my early youth...

In fairness, it was Tiger time, and nearly everyone was!

Is that your excuse?

Really?

DoYouEvenLift · 05-02-2015 01:14PM

Cashier: "enjoy your food"
Me: "Thanks, you too!"

thegreatgonzo · 05-02-2015 01:47PM

I make so many I don't cringe anymore. My particular favourite though is the day I mistook a lamb's penis for his naval and gave it a thorough exploratory probing before my friend told me it was not indeed a naval. In my defence I was not a veterinary nurse at the time and had never been that close to a sheep before. Still though...

RWCNT · 05-02-2015 01:52PM

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

Looking back at some of the munters I've banged over the years is amazingly cringeworthy

Never mind, if you could've done any better I'm sure you would have.

Stone Deaf 4evr · 05-02-2015 01:52PM

was at work and took a phone call from my wife, another call came in on the second line from one of our electricians. Put the mrs on hold and switched lines

got some slagging later when I told him I loved him at the end of the call.

smash · 05-02-2015 01:54PM

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Cashier: "enjoy your food"
Me: "Thanks, you too!"

I do this all the time with fast food delivery guys.

Crumpets · 05-02-2015 01:54PM

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Cashier: "enjoy your food"
Me: "Thanks, you too!"

"Happy Birthday!"
"Thanks, you too!"

RossFixxxed · 05-02-2015 02:07PM

I walked out of the barber's wondering if my hair had been butchered, so I stopped and checked my reflection in a car window.

Then I noticed the coffin inside the car, and the 50 odd people in black clothes, some in tears.... CRINGE.

(My hair looked crap and my ear was bleeding as it turns out)

Talking to my GF in Marks and Spencers, get to the bakery and exclaim "ooo cookies, these are better than sex, no offence love" and I put my hand on her shoulder... but she's 2 aisles over now, and can't even see me. The poor girl who my hand is on shouts in a really scared voice "MUUUUUMMMMM". I never got my cookies.

A week later in the same shop I dropped a strawberry trifle on the floor, and being such a wit said in a drawled "dumb" voice "duhhh strawberry trifle". A man nearby gives me a kind look and says "yes, you're right well done." Cue me having to act like that the whole way out the door of the shop!

I now realise I shouldn't go out in public.

anncoates · 05-02-2015 02:13PM

Stone Deaf 4evr wrote: »

was at work and took a phone call from my wife, another call came in on the second line from one of our electricians. Put the mrs on hold and switched lines

got some slagging later when I told him I loved him at the end of the call.

Your wife sounds like a male tradesman?

The Strawman Argument · 05-02-2015 02:19PM

Passively agreed to go to a competitive debating thingy at the behest of a friend cos I had nothing better to do. For a pretty shy person I've done an absolute ton of pretty silly stuff in front of crowds and most of them I remember somewhat fondly, but that whole experience still makes me cringe like hell; the people just pretend they're 100% on one side of the argument regardless of their personal beliefs, I repeatedly wound up arguing for everyone (including my partner) to be more moderate.

osarusan · 05-02-2015 02:27PM

Went up to a girl (at a table full of girls) in a club looking for a light for my cigarette. She picked up the light, but made some circular/whirling gesture towards my face. I thought she was drunk/mad/whatever, so just nodded and smiled politely, while waiting for the light. The other girls started to watch.

She did the same thing again, I smiled again. She pointed at my face and did the same thing again....I smiled again, and made the 'using a lighter' gesture with my hand. The other girls were all watching now.

She shrugged and lit my cigarette. I started retching immediately, and they all burst out laughing at me.

Turns out the cigarette was the wrong way round in my mouth, so I was inhaling the burning filter.

Going Strong · 05-02-2015 02:34PM

Years ago now, I stupidly went for some after work refreshments with my colleagues before heading for Heuston to get the train to Cork. As we made our way southwards, a mate phoned me and we got chatting. Being a bit tiddly, I was mouthing off all sorts of "Wolf of Wall Street" "I'M ON THE PHONE!" w@nkery to the derision and disgust of my fellow passengers. I still cringe as I recall me regaling all and sundry with shouted comments about everything under the sun with lots of expletives added. If they'd have thrown me out the door into the path of an oncoming train, I'd have deserved every bit of it.

893bet · 05-02-2015 02:39PM

Three words..........those who know will know

"thanks for coming"

Canard · 05-02-2015 02:53PM

RossFixxxed wrote: »

Talking to my GF in Marks and Spencers, get to the bakery and exclaim "ooo cookies, these are better than sex, no offence love" and I put my hand on her shoulder... but she's 2 aisles over now, and can't even see me. The poor girl who my hand is on shouts in a really scared voice "MUUUUUMMMMM". I never got my cookies.

A week later in the same shop I dropped a strawberry trifle on the floor, and being such a wit said in a drawled "dumb" voice "duhhh strawberry trifle". A man nearby gives me a kind look and says "yes, you're right well done." Cue me having to act like that the whole way out the door of the shop!

I now realise I shouldn't go out in public.

Hahahaha

Similar enough story but with the cringe reserved for my friend (I'm male, she's female): we were in marks and spencers buying the cookies that are better than sex, but of course they have to be really soft, so I was checking how soft they were.

I was right beside her but she was kind of at an angle to the shelf, so the people in the aisle could see her but not me. Then I felt the cookies and they were, as I said, "harder than my nipples on a frosty December night". The woman gave my friend a look of disgust.

:pac:

_Brian · 05-02-2015 03:00PM

Years ago went to nightclub with some friends, drove the car and plan was to leave it there, local lad said that would be fine..
Came out of nightclub and he said for sure the car would be stolen or vandalised, that it happens all the time..

So, after maybe 10-12 pints I took the car out up the road, dropped a few lads home. Got to the driveway at home and was so drunk I couldn't get the car into a 12ft gateway, just left it outside..

To this day I'm mortally embarrassed that I didn't have better judgement.. I was 19-20 years of age with a full licence and needed my car for work..

Chip Whitley · 05-02-2015 03:03PM

Many years ago, in secondary school the big 'joke' at the time was to say 'your mother' after anything someone said... anyway, I never really got into it myself, until one French class when one of the lads was struggling to describe a day at the beach in french, he started to describe a pretty lady he met when I jumped in with 'YOUR MOTHER, WAS IT?!'

Waited for the laughs... they never came... the poor lads mother had died years before and seemingly I was the only one in the school who did' know. Mortified. He threatened to kill me me of course until he realised it was a genuine mistake and I profusely apologised after school, which he graciously accepted.

I still cringe thinking about it. The one ****ing time I got involved with a stupid joke.

Ihatecuddles · 05-02-2015 03:05PM

Started working in a beauty salon as a receptionist. One of the beauticians asked me to.put the wax machine on the heater.the heater is what heats the wax, it's plugged into the wall and the.handheld thing just clicks in. She went looking for it just as a client showed.up for her wax, I had left it on the radiator. That's what I thought when she.said heater.

Same salon, first day. The beauticians were all busy.doing massages and other treatments, the phone kept ringing. Every time I answered it there was nobody there. This went on for about 15 minutes, phone constantly ringing and nobody said anything when I answered it. Eventually a beautician came out and let.someone in, it was the.buzzer for the door.and.I left a client outside all that.time.

Another time my husband introduced me to an old friend of his
I put out my hand and said Emma, nice to meet you. He said nice to meet you Emmett.
I said Emma. He said Emmett?
I kept saying Em-ma and he kept saying Emm-ett.
He walked away and I turned to my husband and asked was the guy an idiot or something, he kept calling me Emmett.
My husband was cracking up,turns out he was telling me his name was Emmett.

Tell me how · 05-02-2015 03:05PM

Took my card out of cash machine once and walked away without the cash. Guy next in line knocked on window of car to give it to me. All €300 euro of it! Often shiver when I think about that and how difficult it is to get money and yet to be so flippant as to leave it behind me.

razorblunt · 05-02-2015 03:14PM

Standard ... called the teacher Mam.

He was not impressed.

5rtytry56 · 05-02-2015 04:10PM

Went to the trouble of buying one. I'm more of a Raspberry Pi fan. Actually, I have no use whatever for the Galileo, and it has never been powered on.

Want a spare galileo in a tatty box, seriously.

crazygeryy · 05-02-2015 04:16PM

5rtytry56 wrote: »

Went to the trouble of buying one. I'm more of a Raspberry Pi fan. Actually, I have no use whatever for the Galileo, and it has never been powered on.

Want a spare galileo in a tatty box, seriously.

I think i speak for everyone when i say WTF?

Macavity. · 05-02-2015 04:18PM

When I was about 10 or 11, I bought a toy from a stall in a sort of fair day type thing. I didn't want it but I had expressed interest in it briefly. The woman in charge of the stall was a bit pushy, although not overly so, and I really can't use that as an excuse. I was very quiet and timid back then and I ended up buying the item because I didn't speak up. I'm a lot more assertive now, so I guess it was a life lesson.

crazygeryy · 05-02-2015 04:20PM

I said congratulations when are you due to a woman i just met...............she wasn't due and she wasn't impressed to say the least.

4zn76tysfajdxp · 05-02-2015 04:31PM

5rtytry56 wrote: »

Went to the trouble of buying one. I'm more of a Raspberry Pi fan. Actually, I have no use whatever for the Galileo, and it has never been powered on.

Want a spare galileo in a tatty box, seriously.

Sure.

Small mistakes you've made in the past that make you cringe.

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