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‘People think I’m the devil for having an abortion, but it’s the only option that&

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Comments

  • #122
    Zippie84
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,648 ✭✭✭Zippie84


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    In terms of the decision being baffling, even if you know that the decision is 100% the right thing for you, I'd imagine that it would be hard as a human being not to still think about it and wonder what if.


  • #123
    Tasden
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,166 ✭✭✭Tasden


    darced wrote: »
    She said in the article there hasn't been a day since that she hasn't thought about it, wondering "what if ?"

    That is really sad and makes the decision all the more baffling,she goes on to say that she knows it was the right decision for her but you have to feel that she will struggle to live with it.

    And I can guarantee that there are plenty of parents who had a crisis pregnancy and kept the baby that think and wonder "what if".


  • #124
    Zippie84
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,648 ✭✭✭Zippie84


    I can't help wondering quite how black and white some people see abortion if they find someone's decision to have an abortion baffling cos they think about it every day and wonder what if.


  • #125
    marienbad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,463 ✭✭✭marienbad


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    People have 'what if ' conversations with themselves every day , was that job the right one after all , or that partner, a myriad speculations . The road not taken and all that - so what .

    The women I know that have had abortions have regretted that a decision had to be taken but never ,not one , have regretted the decision .


  • #126
    gormdubhgorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,987 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Cause carrying a child, giving birth and then giving it up for adoption is so easy :rolleyes:

    An an abortion is far easier both physically and emotionally?

    No second chances with an abortion its finite.

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



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  • #127
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 18,749 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    sup_dude wrote: »
    However, abortion is very expensive and heavily frowned upon.

    Its a lot cheaper than raising a child.
    Frowned upon? By you obviously, I don't judge women for having terminations.


  • #128
    gormdubhgorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,987 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    Zippie84 wrote: »
    Yep, all just 'for the sake of nine months'. a minor inconvenience, nothing more to it, right?

    9 months is a minor inconvenience when the alternative is considered I think. It's a very selfish move unless there are serious health implications then I can understand it.

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



  • #129
    gormdubhgorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,987 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    Tasden wrote: »
    And I can guarantee that there are plenty of parents who had a crisis pregnancy and kept the baby that think and wonder "what if".

    You mean like when the now grown teenage child was caught knacker drinking and was grounded and says I hate you mam! :D

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



  • #130
    darced
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,056 ✭✭✭darced


    This post has been deleted.


  • #131
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    gormdubhgorm wrote: »
    An an abortion is far easier both physically and emotionally?

    No second chances with an abortion its finite.

    http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1049386709001595
    http://www.apa.org/pi/women/programs/abortion/mental-health.pdf


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  • #132
    padd b1975
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,852 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Women have abortions for all sorts of reasons. You have no right to judge.

    Yep.
    In this case, being pregnant interfered with her travel plans.


  • #133
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    bubblypop wrote: »
    Its a lot cheaper than raising a child.
    Frowned upon? By you obviously, I don't judge women for having terminations.

    Huh? Where did you get that I frown upon women for having an abortion or that I accused you of doing so?


  • #134
    Tasden
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,166 ✭✭✭Tasden


    gormdubhgorm wrote: »
    You mean like when the now grown teenage child was caught knacker drinking and was grounded and says I hate you mam! :D

    Well I was more thinking about when they can't financially/emotionally/mentally support a child they didn't plan for.

    But sure we can go with your example too!


  • #135
    Tasden
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,166 ✭✭✭Tasden


    darced wrote: »
    I have never met a parent that regretted having a child but different to what is being said here I know a few women that have had abortions and really struggled to get over it.

    Maybe she will be fine with it and think "what if" every now and then and continue on and enjoy her life and I really hope she does.

    Struggling to get over it is not the same as regretting it. I occasionally (read regularly :pac:) struggle with parenting, doesn't mean I regret it.


  • #136
    darced
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,056 ✭✭✭darced


    This post has been deleted.


  • #137
    princesstrixie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13 ✭princesstrixie


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.


    They are parents that regret having a child but they will never tell you. There are parents leaving their young families and never look back.


  • #138
    SparkySpitfire
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,331 ✭✭✭SparkySpitfire


    The same people who want all of these unwanted pregnancies carried to term, are the same ones who give out about "welfare scroungers" when the baby is sent into the system or the mother relies on social welfare and services because she wasn't financially or mentally ready for a child.


  • #139
    princesstrixie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13 ✭princesstrixie


    why is everyone only mentioning the mother? Because she carries the fetus? She is in a long term relationship and has made the decision together with her partner.
    And why should a woman carry out a pregnancy and have a baby she clearly does not want for whatever reason? Being born without someone really wanting you does not promise a nice future.


  • #140
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 18,749 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    sup_dude wrote: »
    No, I'm not saying that.

    I'm saying that I'm also a child of a single mother and if that's "too much" then good god, I'd hate to see the recommended amount. Obviously making something of their lives first would be ideal, I'd say if you spoke to any young parent they'd agree. However, abortion is very expensive and heavily frowned upon.

    This is where you said it is frowned upon


  • #141
    Ave Sodalis
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,555 ✭✭✭Ave Sodalis


    bubblypop wrote: »
    This is where you said it is frowned upon

    It is frowned upon. Heavily. Have a quick look through the thread to see that it is. I'm asking where I said that you or I frowned upon it?


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  • #142
    BlaasForRafa
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,020 ✭✭✭BlaasForRafa


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    Yep.
    In this case, being pregnant interfered with her travel plans.

    Yes, you're quite right. Women should be forced to have the child whenever they get pregnant even if it's against their will. Chain them up if they don't like it, right?


  • #143
    SparkySpitfire
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,331 ✭✭✭SparkySpitfire


    Furthermore, every stupid argument I read that's vilifying women and couples for exercising bodily autonomy and acting in THEIR best interests over a cluster of cells just reaffirms my faith in the pro-choice movement and gives me a reason to fight for what should be my right as an Irish woman.

    I would much rather have a pregnancy terminated sooner rather than later, which sadly is not possible for a lot of Irish women who have to gather funds and get organized for a trip across the sea.


  • #144
    Zippie84
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,648 ✭✭✭Zippie84


    darced wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    It's about your whole life. It's changing the whole path of your life and making a decision that will affect your whole future.

    Of course you'd wonder what if, and I wouldn't necessarily expect every woman to think about it every day for the rest of their lives... but to not expect a woman to think about it every day in the short / medium term afterwards, and wonder what if, when it is such a massive decision is, in my opinion, very naive.

    Reminds me of back thinking that it's just a case of 'nah, feck it, want a holiday / new apartment, I'll have an an abortion so...' no thought put into it at all.

    I would also imagine that having an abortion is almost never black and white, regardless of what other people see externally.

    And there's also the question of why people continually (not just in relation to abortion) judge people based on external things, when we can have no clue what it feels like in their head, but yeah, a whole other question in itself there.


  • #145
    Zippie84
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,648 ✭✭✭Zippie84


    sup_dude wrote: »
    It is frowned upon. Heavily. Have a quick look through the thread to see that it is. I'm asking where I said that you or I frowned upon it?

    Hey sup_dude for what it's worth, I originally read your comment the opposite way from what it was meant, and replied as such, but then saw some of your other comments, and realised I was picking it up wrong, and deleted whatever the response was :)


  • #146
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 18,749 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    sup_dude wrote: »
    It is frowned upon. Heavily. Have a quick look through the thread to see that it is. I'm asking where I said that you or I frowned upon it?

    I think I may have taken your comment up wrong. We are probably on the same page.
    I don't believe that its frowned upon though, it is by the bible thumping loud people, but, in general, I don't believe it is anymore.
    Its just that the minority in this case seems louder than the majority.
    Maybe its catholic guilt!


  • #147
    Pretzill
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,756 ✭✭✭Pretzill


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    Yep.
    In this case, being pregnant interfered with her travel plans.

    Who cares why this lady terminated her pregnancy? She has a right to do so. Unfortunately that right isn't yet available in this country. She like thousands of women before her was forced to utilise a private health clinic in another country. Our country passed the buck...and that is because we still have a large group of small minded, parochial half wits with too large a say in our affairs.

    It is shameful that women are castigated by their uneducated, illinformed, ignorant peers just because they make a personal choice.

    I hope many more women start speaking out like the lady in the OP and abortion is legalised in this country.


  • #148
    Lyaiera
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭Lyaiera


    I fully support and respect this woman's decision.


  • #149
    gormdubhgorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,987 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    SparkySpitfire wrote: »
    Furthermore, every stupid argument I read that's vilifying women and couples for exercising bodily autonomy and acting in THEIR best interests over a cluster of cells just reaffirms my faith in the pro-choice movement and gives me a reason to fight for what should be my right as an Irish woman.

    I would much rather have a pregnancy terminated sooner rather than later, which sadly is not possible for a lot of Irish women who have to gather funds and get organized for a trip across the sea.

    No matter what way you look at it is a waste of a cluster of cells those cluster of cells could be given to someone else a) in the form of a child or b) stem cells

    A terrible waste of raw material which is more valuable then water which will soon be charged for.:eek:

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



  • #150
    Frito
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 769 ✭✭✭Frito


    gormdubhgorm wrote: »
    No matter what way you look at it is a waste of a cluster of cells those cluster of cells could be given to someone else a) in the form of a child or b) stem cells

    A terrible waste of raw material which is more valuable then water which will soon be charged for.:eek:

    If you're arguing resources then why don't these prospective parents adopt or foster kids in the care system? Why do they need ones that haven't even been born yet? All these foeti, taking up the homes of already-born kids.


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  • #151
    Smidge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,541 ✭✭✭Smidge


    boatbuilder wrote: »
    And while I'm here... actually was talking to the friend of a 20 year old Irish woman today who traveled to the UK for an abortion within the last few weeks (she was 23 weeks pregnant).

    Apparently the woman said she wanted to do away with the baby because she felt she couldn't cope with another baby (single mother).
    She told her friend that she felt that so bad that she would kill herself.

    So - off she went, got an abortion... and hey presto two weeks later... she feels more suicidal than ever and will probably be haunted by her actions for the rest of her life. Many abortions are done as a cure for mental health problems that probably existed long before the pregnancy and are not remotely related to the pregnancy itself. Supporting mentally unwell people to have abortions is surely not a great idea.

    Ah yes, here we go again.....
    Women..
    Damned if you do, damned if ya don't.

    Have the baby? Single mother scrounging from the state and ergo us the decent god fearing tax payers.

    Have an abortion because you cant cope and are already overwhelmed?
    Selfish slutty b1tch of a baby killer.


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