Would you take your girlfriend back if she cheated on you?

Irishguy16 · 06-01-2015 03:34PM #1

Just curious about what everyone thinks about this one?

I wouldn't, I feel that the trust would be damaged as a result.

Have you seen relationships survive after a partner had cheated?

harrymagina · 06-01-2015 03:35PM

Depends on much hotter she is than me. Don't think I could go back riding whales again.

BeerWolf · 06-01-2015 03:35PM

Depends if it's a one time thing or a string of it I suppose, and the extent of it.

DellyBelly · 06-01-2015 03:36PM

If my girlfriend looked like Caroline Morahan or Glenda Gilson then yes in a heartbeat but if they weren't so easy on the eye I probably wouldn't

Strong Life in Dublin · 06-01-2015 03:36PM

Eh no way

Tombi! · 06-01-2015 03:37PM

Depends on what counts as cheating.
Blind drunk and taken advantage of doesn't count as cheating but I know people who would count it

spoofilyj · 06-01-2015 03:38PM

Definitely not, once a cheater always a cheater!

Penny Tration · 06-01-2015 03:38PM

I tried to stay with a guy after he cheated on me, but it was never the same and I couldn't trust him tbh.

It really depends. Drunk kiss with a random girl,, I could probably forgive. Kiss with a girl he's friends with, or sex, not a hope

iDave · 06-01-2015 03:39PM

If it were with another chick I'd encourage her to do it again....and film it.

K4t · 06-01-2015 03:40PM

A girlfriend? Depends.

A wife? That's why I'm never getting married.

valoren · 06-01-2015 03:43PM

If it was a case of drunkenly allowing some lad to lob his gob and it was confessed to me, all apologies then perhaps. We all make mistakes. Yellow card. Get off with a caution.

If she was riding someone in clear conscience? Red Card. Early bath. Never want to see you ever again.

_Whimsical_ · 06-01-2015 03:50PM

harrymagina wrote: »

Depends on much hotter she is than me. Don't think I could go back riding whales again.

First I looked at this comment and thought how immature and disrespectful to women... then I realised you're actually saying that you would degrade yourself and be with someone who thought feck all of you as a human being just for sex with a pretty face and I felt kind of better about it.

Dog of Tears · 06-01-2015 03:51PM

Yes, but I would use it as leverage to demand a threesome with another hot chick as a condition of my forgiveness.

Tokyo · 06-01-2015 03:52PM

Depends on the situation and what led up to it. Having said that, I did take a girl back once after she cheated, and it turned out to be the biggest mistake I'd made in a long time, causing much more hurt than if I'd just packed my bags and left there and then. So yeah, probably not.

GalwayGuitar · 06-01-2015 03:52PM

Only the most beta of beta males would take a cheating whore back.

RDM_83 again · 06-01-2015 03:55PM

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

Depends on what counts as cheating.
Blind drunk and taken advantage of doesn't count as cheating but I know people who would count it

Not excusing actual sexual assaults here but I don't think anybody ever gets drunk and does something that at least part of them doesn't want to do.
I'm also not sure about the "taken advantage" of angle, again provided its all consensual isn't it much more worrying that they can be manipulated in this way by other people if they are genuinely committed.
Its easy to say no, its two letters, I know this may sound harsh and in the past I've messed up in a similar way years ago (didn't technically cheat but still not a nice thing to have done), it may be slightly more excusable but its still not good and if its going to be excused by being manipulated/taken advantage of thats possibly pointing to a denial of responsibility and agency.

_Whimsical_ · 06-01-2015 03:58PM

I'm female and I wouldn't take a guy back if he cheated on me. The horrible thing about these sort of decisions though is they're rarely made in your sane senses. Very often they're made when the person who has been cheated on has been kicked so hard in the guts that they feel they are just crap themselves and don't believe they deserve a whole lot better so they'll hang on to what they've got. I know a girl it happened to recently who is a professional, clever, beautiful girl who'd never have thought she'd stand for such behaviour. Instead the experience dented her confidence so much that she had come around to believing that her bf cheating was partially her fault saying things like "well as he said, if I hadn't argued about Christmas that night he'd never have gone and slept with his friend, everything would've been fine so we both have to take responsibility".

It's such a crappy thing to do to someone, to rob them of that trust in someone they're close too. If it's in a good and close relationship it leaves a scar that lasts a long time.

jimgoose · 06-01-2015 04:01PM

Once the jive bee-yatch keep bringin' de Dead Presidents I ain't givin' a shít.

_Whimsical_ · 06-01-2015 04:02PM

Sculptedlats wrote: »

He's allowed to make his own decisions, you're so offended by someone having the temerity to value physical beaty that you are salivating at the mouth for any reason to ridicule them.

I'm not ridiculing him, I'm reflecting back to him what he said.

You on the other hand are ridiculing me. Hypocritical much?
Also the dramatic licence with the "salavating at the mouth bit", you really over played your card there but it was kind of funny

I'd say that is just an observation but you may take it as me ridiculing you if you like.

RDM_83 again · 06-01-2015 04:09PM

Sculptedlats wrote: »

You made a ridiculous comment about him disrespecting women. That deserves ridicule.

I presume thats the riding wales part! The rest of it is just him disrespecting himself

Tombi! · 06-01-2015 04:10PM

RDM_83 again wrote: »

Not excusing actual sexual assaults here but I don't think anybody ever gets drunk and does something that at least part of them doesn't want to do.
I'm also not sure about the "taken advantage" of angle, again provided its all consensual isn't it much more worrying that they can be manipulated in this way by other people if they are genuinely committed.
Its easy to say no, its two letters, I know this may sound harsh and in the past I've messed up in a similar way years ago (didn't technically cheat but still not a nice thing to have done), it may be slightly more excusable but its still not good and if its going to be excused by being manipulated/taken advantage of thats possibly pointing to a denial of responsibility and agency.

I'm on about clear sexual assault here. If you get drunk and do stuff I consider it cheating

_Whimsical_ · 06-01-2015 04:14PM

Sculptedlats wrote: »

You made a ridiculous comment about him disrespecting women. That deserves ridicule.

Actually calling women whales and deciding that their value in a relationship is solely based on their appearance IS disrespectful to women...in the context of the comment by the poster however the greater inherent disrespect was to himself.

Your slightly hysterical response and this embarrassingly hypocritical "you deserve to be ridiculed" stuff has amused me though so lets not go to war on it. Well you can if you want, I won't be responding again.:)

Vomit · 06-01-2015 04:15PM

GalwayGuitar wrote: »

Only the most beta of beta males would take a cheating whore back.

Surely you mean Omega male.. beta males are the second in command, waiting in the wings for the alpha to fall. No self respecting man would take back a cheating girlfriend

RDM_83 again · 06-01-2015 04:21PM

Vomit wrote: »

Surely you mean Omega male.. beta males are the second in command, waiting in the wings for the alpha to fall. No self respecting man would take back a cheating girlfriend

Your saying the Omega man isn't a total boss :eek:

Its the Epsilon-Minus guys are just fcuked

(sometimes I wonder if the bodybuilding/PUA types for all their hidden nerdyness have ever actually read/watched any Sci-FI )

GalwayGuitar · 06-01-2015 04:25PM

Vomit wrote: »

Surely you mean Omega male.. beta males are the second in command, waiting in the wings for the alpha to fall. No self respecting man would take back a cheating girlfriend

Aren't omegas the ones who don't care about women and just do their own thing? In a sense they're the opposite side of the same coin. Whereas betas mumble and stutter and fight among themselves for the alpha's leftovers?

Egginacup · 06-01-2015 04:25PM

Took back a girlfriend who cheated on me once and we stayed together for a few years but it was a huge mistake. We were incompatible in the first place and I should have taken her infidelity as my cue to drop her and get out there carousing with the many infinitely more suitable flowers that were available at the time. Eventually broke up with her after I had been sleeping around on her. It was such a waste of 5 years to have stayed together and it ended in classic bad style.

JoeA3 · 06-01-2015 04:26PM

From rather painful personal experience, I would say NO.

I tried to "forgive and forget" many years ago and while initially things seemed good (we both promised to make more effort with each other, blah blah), the hurt and mis-trust really took hold of me in the months afterwards. On reflection, it would have been better to end it sooner. I think if a partner cheats it's a huge red flag for the relationship itself - clearly one or even both partners are unhappy if one resorts to it and alcohol is a poor excuse too.

Having said that, it is easy to dismissively say "No way" on here, but if you find yourself in this horrible position, it can be really difficult to cut your losses and let her go.

shrewd · 06-01-2015 04:31PM

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

I'm female and I wouldn't take a guy back if he cheated on me. The horrible thing about these sort of decisions though is they're rarely made in your sane senses. Very often they're made when the person who has been cheated on has been kicked so hard in the guts that they feel they are just crap themselves and don't believe they deserve a whole lot better so they'll hang on to what they've got. I know a girl it happened to recently who is a professional, clever, beautiful girl who'd never have thought she'd stand for such behaviour. Instead the experience dented her confidence so much that she had come around to believing that her bf cheating was partially her fault saying things like "well as he said, if I hadn't argued about Christmas that night he'd never have gone and slept with his friend, everything would've been fine so we both have to take responsibility".

It's such a crappy thing to do to someone, to rob them of that trust in someone they're close too. If it's in a good and close relationship it leaves a scar that lasts a long time.

interesting, would you consider sleeping with an hooker cheating?
.
.
.
.
Actually, i would and i think most people here would

Dog of Tears · 06-01-2015 04:37PM

When I was much younger I found out that a GF had cheated on me with an ex of hers.

I confronted her, she begged forgiveness, swore it would never happen again and I took her back.
But I couldn't let it go, it gnawed at me for months afterwards.

I eventually began cheating on her with other girls - I suppose I was trying to 'even things up'. We eventually broke up a year or so later in a very messy way.

In retrospect I wish I'd taken the high road and just left after finding out, but she was super-hot, great in bed and I was scared I wouldn't find someone else as good.

It's a tough situation and there's no right or wrong answer. I know couples who have survived cheating and gone on to thrive - it really depends,

endacl · 06-01-2015 04:40PM

DellyBelly wrote: »

If my girlfriend looked like Caroline Morahan then yes in a heartbeat

Seriously?!?

:pac:

Egginacup · 06-01-2015 04:42PM

Dog of Tears wrote: »

When I was much younger I found out that a GF had cheated on me with an ex of hers.

I confronted her, she begged forgiveness, swore it would never happen again and I took her back.
But I couldn't let it go, it gnawed at me for months afterwards.

I eventually began cheating on her with other girls - I suppose I was trying to 'even things up'. We eventually broke up a year or so later in a very messy way.

In retrospect I wish I'd taken the high road and just left after finding out, but she was super-hot, great in bed and I was scared I wouldn't find someone else as good.

It's a tough situation and there's no right or wrong answer. I know couples who have survived cheating and gone on to thrive - it really depends,

Absolute CARBON COPY of my experience!

Would you take your girlfriend back if she cheated on you?

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