Best way to discipline a hamster?

A Greedy Algorithm · 12-11-2014 02:39AM #1

I have hamster that needs to he disciplined for a wrong doing.

I do not want to harm it or do anything bad as it is usually well behaved.

What is the best way to apply some discipline?

Kevin McCloud · 12-11-2014 02:40AM

Set the hounds on him.

Macavity. · 12-11-2014 02:40AM

You can't discipline a hamster.

biko · 12-11-2014 02:43AM

Take away his little wheel, that'll learn him.

A Greedy Algorithm · 12-11-2014 02:46AM

Macavity. wrote: »

You can't discipline a hamster.

What about every time it misbehaves I pick it up and give him a slight squeeze?

Not hard as I do not want to hurt it. Would this work?

endacl · 12-11-2014 02:46AM

This works. You'll need a buddy, and a handball alley though.

Slicemeister · 12-11-2014 02:48AM

Try tickling him until his cheeks go red.

kowloon · 12-11-2014 02:48AM

Hamsters deal in cold, hard logic. Debate the issue.

csallmighty · 12-11-2014 02:48AM

Cut off its allowance

endacl · 12-11-2014 02:48AM

Slicemeister wrote: »

Try tickling him until his cheeks go red.

Face cheeks, or....?

wardy2 · 12-11-2014 02:49AM

Have you try sending it to a
hamster school

biko · 12-11-2014 02:51AM

You have to use Operant conditioning to teach animals stuff. It suppresses undesirable behaviour and reward desired behaviour.

KeithM89 · 12-11-2014 02:51AM

10 seconds in the microwave on a low heat.

Cantremember · 12-11-2014 02:53AM

With a rabbit.

The Backwards Man · 12-11-2014 02:55AM

The hamster is probably deliberating on how to discipline you. Smart bastards, hamsters are.

brummytom · 12-11-2014 02:55AM

Hamsters are vicious little cúnts. Have you got a cat? Or anything that would eat a rodent?

Macavity. · 12-11-2014 02:56AM

A Greedy Algorithm wrote: »

What about every time it misbehaves I pick it up and give him a slight squeeze?

Not hard as I do not want to hurt it. Would this work?

Just kill the bastard. Feed him to a cow and video it. Post it in cool vids & pics & links.

Kevin McCloud · 12-11-2014 02:59AM

Kill him with a left footed slean.

Lapin · 12-11-2014 02:59AM

18 posts in and no one has suggested introducing the hamster to Freddy Starr.

Slicemeister · 12-11-2014 03:00AM

endacl wrote: »

Face cheeks, or....?

Unless you want to be covered in hamster excrement, whatever floats your boat.....

Adamantium · 12-11-2014 03:00AM

KeithM89 wrote: »

10 seconds in the microwave on a low heat.

Truly a Jack Bauer moment.

ardle1 · 12-11-2014 03:33AM

Poor hamster is probably gay, and thought by being a nidgey hamster he would impress you....
those relationships never last funk him up big shytle and do a frano on him... Eh with a tooth-pick, in ratio to his size and all that, be gentle..:eek:

Son Of A Vidic · 12-11-2014 03:38AM

Wheel clamp works all the time.

Chunners · 12-11-2014 03:38AM

Beat the living ****e out of yourself in front of him, studies show that hamsters running on their wheel really get the point when humans get self inflicted black eyes in front of them especially if the human in question deserves it

AngryHippie · 12-11-2014 03:46AM

Blast the hamster with piss !

(Surprised it wasn't mentioned earlier)

Chunners · 12-11-2014 04:04AM

Show him who's boss from the start

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jybGyuRYwug

Angry_Mammarys · 12-11-2014 04:34AM

Give the little sh!t a kick up the arse

Duggy747 · 12-11-2014 04:52AM

Make love to him.

Uncle Ruckus · 12-11-2014 05:25AM

Flick his nuts.

Ed Winchester · 12-11-2014 06:14AM

What was the wrong doing? Just so we know what kind of hamster this is.

Miss Lizzie Jones · 12-11-2014 06:17AM

A Greedy Algorithm wrote: »

What about every time it misbehaves I pick it up and give him a slight squeeze?

Not hard as I do not want to hurt it. Would this work?

If you want to get bitten go ahead but I really hope you're joking.

Best way to discipline a hamster?

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