Poo in unisex work-place toilets?

The Purveyor of Truth · 11-09-2014 06:03PM

Lighthouse cinema has one and I always feel like I shouldn't be in there when I hear women coming in and chatting at the mirror and I'm sitting in a cubicle waiting for them to fcuk off so I can let go of Red Logtober.

Hate the damn things.

Custardpi · 11-09-2014 06:04PM

Celly Smunt wrote: »

Why can't people just crap at home?

So if you really need to go at 2 o'clock you should just hold it in for several hours? Not going to work for most people.

Celly Smunt · 11-09-2014 06:06PM

Custardpi wrote: »

So if you really need to go at 2 o'clock you should just hold it in for several hours? Not going to work for most people.

Go before work?...

mfceiling · 11-09-2014 06:07PM

Threads like this make me miss flutterin bantam...

Custardpi · 11-09-2014 06:08PM

Celly Smunt wrote: »

Go before work?...

You need to go when you need to go. Unless you're a robot most people can't precisely time when their bodily functions kick in.

Pawwed Rig · 11-09-2014 06:10PM

The Purveyor of Truth wrote: »

Lighthouse cinema has one and I always feel like I shouldn't be in there when I hear women coming in and chatting at the mirror and I'm sitting in a cubicle waiting for them to fcuk off so I can let go of Red Logtober.

Hate the damn things.

They leave quicker if you just go for it

The_Valeyard · 11-09-2014 06:10PM

Women I know freak out when it comes to unisex toilets, for some reason they do not like me inside the same cubical they use at the same time, ugh some people....

MonkieSocks · 11-09-2014 06:11PM

Banjaxed82 wrote: »

What does it say about someone's character when they can have a stinky poo in a unisex work-place toilet?

These toilets might I add are so close, you pretty much know who was in last.

Mkay

...you need to contact The Hardly Boys to solve this Mystery

CarrickMcJoe · 11-09-2014 06:18PM

Wait till January when everyone gets their first water bills, then there'll be a queue for the crapper.....

Then the thread will read........Don't you just hate it when someone only leaves one square of bogroll!

ollaetta · 11-09-2014 06:19PM

mauzo! wrote: »

I actually enjoy pooping in a public toilet. I hate doing it at home I only do it twice a week but when I do, I make sure I do when my husband is at work, I'd be mortified if he went in after me.

Have you considered contacting the Guinness Book of Records? If I only went twice a week I'd explode!

Yer Aul One · 11-09-2014 06:24PM

ollaetta wrote: »

Have you considered contacting the Guinness Book of Records? If I only went twice a week I'd explode!

3-4 times daily man.

The worst is if you are lucky to go home to a girl's house after a night out (stranger). The next morning, your gut is overflowing with a thick guinnessy slurry. You are lying there in bed with a silo of gas in your anal passage. You squeeze to keep it in. Shooting pains arise.

Can you use her en-suite then??

Not G.R · 11-09-2014 06:29PM

Custardpi wrote: »

Assuming the person hasn't done a H-Block on jacks.

The whole thread was worth it for this phrase alone.

Custardpi · 11-09-2014 06:30PM

Yer Aul One wrote: »

3-4 times daily man.

The worst is if you are lucky to go home to a girl's house after a night out (stranger). The next morning, your gut is overflowing with a thick guinnessy slurry. You are lying there in bed with a silo of gas in your anal passage. You squeeze to keep it in. Shooting pains arise.

Can you use her en-suite then??

Previously (assuming another toilet wasn't in reasonable distance) the best bet for those who felt awkward in that situation would be to use it but run the taps to mask the sound of the bay doors opening. Unfortunately come October that's no longer an option

Yer Aul One · 11-09-2014 06:34PM

Custardpi wrote: »

Previously (assuming another toilet wasn't in reasonable distance) the best bet for those who felt awkward in that situation would be to use it but run the taps to mask the sound of the bay doors opening. Unfortunately come October that's no longer an option

I am talking about a $hite after a rake of guinness, battlefield noises wouldn't mask this!

Custardpi · 11-09-2014 06:40PM

Yer Aul One wrote: »

I am talking about a $hite after a rake of guinness, battlefield noises wouldn't mask this!

In that case I guess you'd have to decide whether you wanted to see the girl or not. If you didn't, then let rip as you don't need to impress her anymore. On the other hand if you wanted to get into a relationship with her, the ability to put up with your Guinness noises would be a good indicator of how strong her feelings for you were.

fedor.2. · 11-09-2014 06:42PM

Duggy747 wrote: »

What kind of poo are we talking about here; Thick meaty cigar-logs or scuttery human butter?

scuttery human butter!!!!! Oh god:(

threeball · 11-09-2014 06:42PM

Potatoeman wrote: »

Someone in work every Monday pebbledashes the toilet. They get the whole inside of the bowl. I dont know how they do it they must have an elastic colon. I'd be disgusted if I wasnt so impressed.

Thats nothing. Was on a building site once where some lad managed to **** 4ft up the wall and all over the rim of the bowl

Roquentin · 11-09-2014 06:48PM

anyone fancy a poo cocktail supremé

Ihatecuddles · 11-09-2014 06:49PM

ollaetta wrote: »

Have you considered contacting the Guinness Book of Records? If I only went twice a week I'd explode!

My husband thinks I'm nuts too, he's a 3 times a day man.

I think that's crazy!!

super_furry · 11-09-2014 06:52PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7O59sTVtqPI

ToddyDoody · 11-09-2014 06:52PM

Go in and make your own fart noises

gugleguy · 11-09-2014 06:57PM

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Go in and make your own fart noises

Yeh OP, Go in and present your own orchestral symphony.:pac:.

Teyla Emmagan · 11-09-2014 06:59PM

On our floor in work, outside the lifts, there's a gents and a ladies and a disabled loo. The disabled one is the only one that doesn't have a self-closing door - one of those arm things at the top. I have never seen a woman coming out of that toilet. Just guys, and more often or not leaving the door swinging open behind them, so that you emerge from the lift into a smell of sh(te so bad it nearly knocks you back into it.

They're a bunch of beasts.

stimpson · 11-09-2014 07:01PM

The OP is not getting much sympathy here. It must take all the fun out of sniffing toilet seats when there is a brown trout staring at you.

Banjaxed82 · 11-09-2014 07:03PM

Banjaxed82 wrote: »

What does it say about someone's character when they can have a stinky poo in a unisex work-place toilet?

These toilets might I add are so close, you pretty much know who was in last.

I should have mentioned. There are 2 toilets downstairs (about 40 seconds walk away) where no body works.