the most ridiculous complaint you have heard.

RichardoKhan · 08-09-2014 10:18AM

Was on a conf call with a Major US (West Coast) Customer & she was getting frantic & complaining as to why a shipment of Print material couldnt be got to Scotland in half a day. She said surely you just load in on to the truck & drive it to the site. Its not that far in distance......at which point I interjected & said their was only one problem to which she exhaustedly asked what?
I said " Its a little thing called the Irish sea"......
Everyone on our side of the call wet ourselves........
Her end went quiet for a few minutes

Shenshen · 08-09-2014 10:21AM

Husband : I can't wash the dishes in this bowl in this sink, it's too low down, it makes my back hurt!

Me : *takes bowl full of dish water out of sink, puts smaller upturned bowl into sink, places bowl with dish water on top of the upturned bowl, giving it an extra 10 or 15 cm height*

Husband : But ... but... you can't do that, what will I complain about now???

sullivlo · 08-09-2014 10:23AM

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

Worked in shipping in dublin port. One day, came in to find that the overnight boat hadn't sailed due to a force 10 gale, which wasn't a surprise, as it was still blowing.

First call, irate customer, demand to know why his cars aren't in Liverpool yet. I explained the situation, to which his response was, "May I remind you that you're nearest competitor is only 100 yards down the road!"

Where he can only have assumed the weather was beautiful....

Ha. I worked in shipping in the port too and some of the complaints were like yours. The complaints about the weather were the best.

Going Strong · 08-09-2014 10:30AM

Years go now, I was doing some contract work in an office. One of the women in accounts won three million in the lottery. Instead of being happy for their colleague, I had to listen to umpteen moaners going on and on how it was "Unfair. Sure doesn't herself and her husband already have a nice house and two cars and come from well-off families." etc. I tried explaining the term 'lottery' but gave up as it was futile in the face of such idiocy.

AdolfHipster · 08-09-2014 10:39AM

SureYWouldntYa wrote: »

People ordering gazpacho, then wondering why their soup is cold

GO BACK TO RUSSIA!

se conman · 08-09-2014 10:40AM

Wife was thick as feck with me one morning, and for the life of me I couldn't understand why (normally I have a decent idea what I have done wrong) She eventually started to complain viciously to me about something I had done in a dream she had.
Men just can't win.

suicide_circus · 08-09-2014 10:41AM

se conman wrote: »

Wife was thick as feck with me one morning, and for the life of me I couldn't understand why (normally I have a decent idea what I have done wrong) She eventually started to complain viciously to me about something I had done in a dream she had.
Men just can't win.

Be glad she can't see what you get up to in YOUR dreams!

preston johnny · 08-09-2014 10:52AM

Stayed at the Davy Crockett ranch (situated in a forest) at Euro Disney with the family a few years ago, some Chavs were complaining at reception that they had seen a squirrel near their log cabin

'Eating some facking nuts'

kylith · 08-09-2014 10:52AM

I used to work booking kids into swimming classes. The amount of people who don't bother booking in time and then get pissy because the class is full and I somehow should have known that they wanted a place in it is unreal. I had one woman once demand that I move one of the booked, paid up people out of the class so she could have their space. How about, no.

Toots · 08-09-2014 11:09AM

I worked in a shop in my youth, it was before the days of 24 hour stores - it opened at 9am and closed at 7pm, except Thursday, when it opened til 9, although we always used to say opening til 9 was pointless because it was extremely rare to have a customer in after about 8pm.

One friday morning a customer come in and complain that he couldn't get in to the shop the previous night, because it was closed. I asked him what time he had come at (thinking the guys working the previous night had decided to shut up a bit early since there was nobody in) and he replied "oh, it was about 11 or so". I asked him did he not see the opening hours which are in large writing on the doors, "sure who looks at those?" he says.

md23040 · 08-09-2014 11:12AM

Overheard two Americans females in a small village shop in Donegal and were looking to buy Ireland football jerseys to bring back home to the nippers.

Hi I notice these are made in China, have you any ones made in Ireland, as I’d prefer one that’s made in Ireland.

Sorry no that’s the only ones we have and they’re €4.99 each.

Twenty questions later from everything from how would you wash it, to fabric content, to assuring it won’t shrink etc, dye wouldn’t run, she was satisfied enough and decided to buy two of them, and sales persons rang sale up

Before she handed over the tenner she said

Look if we change our minds, we’re heading to Germany tomorrow, have you got a store there we can do an exchange or refund if we change our minds

No we don’t

Oh in that case I’ll look elsewhere and they walked straight out without another word

CPSW · 08-09-2014 11:16AM

About 10 years ago, I was queuing up in McDonalds, when the customer in front of me asked the girl behind the counter for a coke (with extra ice) with her meal.

She gets served and goes away. Two seconds later when I am about to be served, she storms in front of me, she screeches with the top of her voice and demands the girl give her a fresh coke, as the one she has is "too cold".

What an idiot!!!

suicide_circus · 08-09-2014 11:23AM

md23040 wrote: »

Overheard two Americans females in a small village shop in Donegal and were looking to buy Ireland football jerseys to bring back home to the nippers.

Hi I notice these are made in China, have you any ones made in Ireland, as I’d prefer one that’s made in Ireland.

Sorry no that’s the only ones we have and they’re €4.99 each.

Twenty questions later from everything from how would you wash it, to fabric content, to assuring it won’t shrink etc, dye wouldn’t run, she was satisfied enough and decided to buy two of them, and sales persons rang sale up

Before she handed over the tenner she said

Look if we change our minds, we’re heading to Germany tomorrow, have you got a store there we can do an exchange or refund if we change our minds

No we don’t

Oh in that case I’ll look elsewhere and they walked straight out without another word

A swift "FCUK THE FCUK OFF!" was in order there.

foggy_lad · 08-09-2014 11:33AM

Years ago on a ferry from dover-calais the ferry was delayed docking at Calais because of the weather and heard two British people whinging about the bloody French and how they couldn't run anything properly and how next time they would pay a little extra for the hovercraft.

I pointed out to them the hovercraft that had flew past us on the way to Calais returning to Dover having been unable to land at Calais due to the high winds. We were only delayed by about 20minutes.

Gannicus · 08-09-2014 11:33AM

This is the worst complaint I've ever heard -->

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I occasionally will treat myself and the significant other to a meal in a Michelin starred restaurant.

Every so often you'll see a people there who don't quite fit in. The ill-fitting jacket, the wide-eyed looking at the prices on the wine menu and the overall lack of table etiquette.

Then they'll complain about the portion sizes, or try and ask for the dish 'without onions' or I geniunely heard one man ask in a well-known Dublin Michelin star if he could get a portion of chips as he was still starving

UCDVet wrote: »

Is it bad to ask for no onions? Never been to a fancy restaurant - so I'm actually curious.

Yeah UCDVet if you go somewhere ask for more chips or for something without onions it means you're the lowest of the low. I mean the nerve of you to not be full sitting beside such elitists

:D

Drakares · 08-09-2014 11:36AM

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I occasionally will treat myself and the significant other to a meal in a Michelin starred restaurant.

Every so often you'll see a people there who don't quite fit in. The ill-fitting jacket, the wide-eyed looking at the prices on the wine menu and the overall lack of table etiquette.

Then they'll complain about the portion sizes, or try and ask for the dish 'without onions' or I geniunely heard one man ask in a well-known Dublin Michelin star if he could get a portion of chips as he was still starving

How dare they. I can only imagine your face as your dining space is infiltraded by the peasants.

Ush1 · 08-09-2014 11:40AM

I remember I was out with a guy from work on lunch in a local gastro pub that did nice food.

The fella from work is French and I mean very French. He ordered some pasta dish thing and then called over the waitress.

He starts going on about the dish not being creamy and having no life or pop, waving his arms an all. She took it away and I have no idea what they did but she came back with the same dish, he tasted it and said he's still not happy but will eat it anyway.

I honestly wanted to sink into the chair and die.

ireland.man · 08-09-2014 11:53AM

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I occasionally will treat myself and the significant other to a meal in a Michelin starred restaurant.

Every so often you'll see a people there who don't quite fit in. The ill-fitting jacket, the wide-eyed looking at the prices on the wine menu and the overall lack of table etiquette.

Then they'll complain about the portion sizes, or try and ask for the dish 'without onions' or I geniunely heard one man ask in a well-known Dublin Michelin star if he could get a portion of chips as he was still starving

This is obviously a joke reply, right? Right??

ash23 · 08-09-2014 11:54AM

Customer: "you didn't pay my claim. Rant rant rant....useless...incompetent.....gangsters...ripping me off"

Me:"You no longer have a policy with us. You cancelled at renewal. Did you renew elsewhere?"

Customer: "How am I supposed to know?"

Me: "Check your policy document. What does it say?"

Customer: "*insert other insurance company name here*"

Me: "ok, well you need to claim from the people you're insured with now as the incident was within that policy year. I'll post you back your receipts"

Customer: "What!!! Are you telling me I have to send in another claim? This is taking ages, you're just delaying things now...gansters...rip off....useless.....rabble rabble..." and hangs up.

Durrrrrr.

osarusan · 08-09-2014 11:54AM

Leave him alone. He works on the cutting edge of German finance.

Chancer3001 · 08-09-2014 12:22PM

It's the most obvious troll account I've seen

Mr Freeze · 08-09-2014 12:26PM

"This salmon tastes too....................fishy!"

Was actually said on The Restaurant tv show on RTE.

osarusan · 08-09-2014 12:31PM

Mr Freeze wrote: »

Was actually said on The Restaurant tv show on RTE.

I remember that on one of those episodes, there was a table who ordered some dish (Italian?) of thin slices of raw fish (which had been marinated in some sauce) and they were complaining because it was raw.

The celebrity chef (whoever he was) was so annoyed with them in a 'it's supposed to be raw you idiot' said-through-clenched-teeth kind of way.

bear1 · 08-09-2014 12:32PM

About a year ago my wife and brother were walking through a shopping center when they heard two Americans complain about why no one is speaking English...............

.......... They were in Warsaw :rolleyes:

keano_afc · 08-09-2014 12:46PM

I work in IT so I have some humdingers.

Know when you minimize a window and drag it around a screen, sometimes there's a little trail of the window behind it as you drag? User complained about that.

We're IT. We've had calls from users about faulty air conditioning units and one guy once called us to say his crisps were stuck in the vending machine.

Cantona's Collars · 08-09-2014 12:58PM

"The kids next door can see into my garden when they bounce on their trampoline".I didn't know if I was meant to laugh or hit the guy.

kylith · 08-09-2014 01:07PM

Ush1 wrote: »

I remember I was out with a guy from work on lunch in a local gastro pub that did nice food.

The fella from work is French and I mean very French. He ordered some pasta dish thing and then called over the waitress.

He starts going on about the dish not being creamy and having no life or pop, waving his arms an all. She took it away and I have no idea what they did but she came back with the same dish, he tasted it and said he's still not happy but will eat it anyway.

I honestly wanted to sink into the chair and die.

I worked with a guy who sent his steak back to the kitchen 5 times for being overcooked. I shudder to think what they did to the last one that was sent out.

He was a complete wankstain though, so he deserved it.

emeldc · 08-09-2014 01:22PM

I was once out the front of my house playing 'fetch' with my dog. After about 10 or 15 mins an irate neighbour came out and asked me to stop as her dog was barking at my dog (he was in her bedroom) and she was trying to get some sleep

Gannicus · 08-09-2014 01:29PM

kylith wrote: »

I worked with a guy who sent his steak back to the kitchen 5 times for being overcooked. I shudder to think what they did to the last one that was sent out.

He was a complete wankstain though, so he deserved it.

To be fair I would be the same. I hate when I get a steak that's anything more than a blue steak, especially considering I emphasis how I want a blue steak. Considering the price of a decent fillet of steak I think if its not cooked to the standard you ordered it then you should definitely send it back.

NormalBob Ubiquitypants · 08-09-2014 01:41PM

Gannicus wrote: »

To be fair I would be the same. I hate when I get a steak that's anything more than a blue steak, especially considering I emphasis how I want a blue steak. Considering the price of a decent fillet of steak I think if its not cooked to the standard you ordered it then you should definitely send it back.

Oh god I am the complete opposite. I don't want a single piece of red in it. I usually ask for any sort of meat to be cremated.

the most ridiculous complaint you have heard.

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