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Trivial things that annoy you Part 43

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Comments

  • #4022
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    I've honestly never seen the likes -

    I'm sitting outside a coffee shop, two Gardaí interviewing a couple of yahoos across the road,when some ould one stops in the middle of the road, gets out of her car, and walks up to one of the Gardaí and has a word with her.

    The Garda walks her back to her car, jumps in the driver seat, and parallel parks the car for the ould one, leaving the other Garda on her own with the three lads!

    I'm still in fcuking shock :pac:


  • #4023
    Barely There
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,481 ✭✭✭Barely There


    When you write a sarcastic reply to someone's post and they thank you because they think you agree with them.


  • #4024
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 15,092 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    Maximus Alexander wrote: »
    I was crossing the road this morning and I straight up walked into the back of a car that was stopped in traffic. The length of time it takes me to wake up in the morning is annoying.


    I once walked around my own car to go up to my sister's to collect it, having entirely forgotten that A) I hadn't actually left it there and B) I had to physically skirt it to get across the road to walk up to her house in the first place.


  • #4025
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    I don't even like when the oh has stubble. If I came home and he had a mass amount of pubes sprouting from his face he wouldn't be getting anywhere near me, and that's for sure.

    Although I only see this trend in Portlaoise, and the women are hardly beautiful there either. Probably just as hairy too


  • #4026
    Barely There
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,481 ✭✭✭Barely There


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    I don't even like when the oh has stubble. If I came home and he had a mass amount of pubes sprouting from his face he wouldn't be getting anywhere near me, and that's for sure.

    My OH won't let me near her with even the merest hint of stubble.

    We have reached a compromise whereby I will have a close shave while she slips into something a little less comfortable before we get down to some bedroom naughtiness.


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  • #4027
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    I don't even like when the oh has stubble.

    It's not nice to wrap your lips around something hairy :pac:


  • #4028
    SpaceCowb0y
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,094 ✭✭✭SpaceCowb0y


    smash wrote: »
    It's not nice to wrap your lips around something hairy :pac:

    Tell that to the lad who sits beside me in work, he likes to eat Kiwis with the skin on!


  • #4029
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    SpaceCowb0y wrote: »
    Tell that to the lad who sits beside me in work, he likes to eat Kiwis with the skin on!

    I used to do that when I was a teenager. They remind me of scrotums now though!!! (It's always fun to rearrange fruit bowls so that you have a banana between 2 kiwis. I'm not far off 40 and I still giggle at that.)


  • #4030
    Banjo String
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    When you're driving behind people who slow down to like 3kmh just because they've approached a speed bump.

    It's not gonna make your bloody car blow up. :mad:

    Yes, they're designed to slow you down, but not to a literal halt FFS.


  • #4031
    eisenberg1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,387 ✭✭✭eisenberg1


    Aglomerado wrote: »
    I used to do that when I was a teenager. They remind me of scrotums now though!!! (It's always fun to rearrange fruit bowls so that you have a banana between 2 kiwis. I'm not far off 40 and I still giggle at that.)

    I am giggling too, blue balls I have heard of, but never a green scrotom:D


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  • #4032
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    I am giggling too, blue balls I have heard of, but never a green scrotom:D

    What about the yellow willie?


  • #4033
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Banjo String wrote: »
    When you're driving behind people who slow down to like 3kmh just because they've approached a speed bump.

    It's not gonna make your bloody car blow up. :mad:

    Yes, they're designed to slow you down, but not to a literal halt FFS.
    There's a cop car about a mile ahead... better slow down to 50kmh below the speed limit!


  • #4034
    eisenberg1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,387 ✭✭✭eisenberg1


    On the subject of green scrotums...

    Whats worse than being bonked by The Hulk?


  • #4035
    Reggie.
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,634 ✭✭✭✭Reggie.


    Aglomerado wrote: »
    I used to do that when I was a teenager. They remind me of scrotums now though!!! (It's always fun to rearrange fruit bowls so that you have a banana between 2 kiwis. I'm not far off 40 and I still giggle at that.)

    :D


  • #4036
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    On the subject of green scrotums...

    Whats worse than being bonked by The Hulk?

    ? Not being bonked by the Hulk? (Phowarrr!) :D
    Dunno?! :pac:


  • #4037
    Dial Hard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 15,092 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    smash wrote: »
    There's a cop car about a mile ahead... better slow down to 50kmh below the speed limit!

    Bonus idiot points to people who do this when it's a cash escort.


  • #4038
    eisenberg1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,387 ✭✭✭eisenberg1


    Aglomerado wrote: »
    ? Not being bonked by the Hulk? (Phowarrr!) :D
    Dunno?! :pac:

    Being fingered by ET:D


  • #4039
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    Being fingered by ET:D

    :eek:


  • #4040
    gramar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,045 ✭✭✭✭gramar


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    Being fingered by ET:D

    I thought it was going to be getting jizzed on by spiderman.


  • #4041
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    Being fingered by ET:D

    What's green and smells of bacon?




















    Kermit's fingers!


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  • #4042
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    I am giggling too, blue balls I have heard of, but never a green scrotom:D
    Aglomerado wrote: »
    What about the yellow willie?

    I have some penicillin knocking around here if ye's want...


  • #4043
    gugleguy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,959 ✭✭✭gugleguy


    Don't forget ALF.


  • #4044
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    What do you have if you have a big green ball in each hand?































    Complete control of the Incredible Hulk!


  • #4045
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    eisenberg1 wrote: »
    Being fingered by ET:D


    When will I ever learn not to be reading Boards in public! :pac:

    Also, you're supposed to peel kiwis? Who knew! I only found out about two years ago I'd been opening bananas wrong all these years!

    (the other end, not the snag end!)


  • #4046
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    There's definitely a Pinochio nose extending/wooden/growing sex joke here but I can't seem to give it expression :(


  • #4047
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Czarcasm wrote: »
    When will I ever learn not to be reading Boards in public! :pac:

    Also, you're supposed to peel kiwis? Who knew! I only found out about two years ago I'd been opening bananas wrong all these years!

    (the other end, not the snag end!)


    Eh? Are we meant to peel them upside down? That makes no sense :confused:


  • #4048
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,792 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    There's definitely a Pinochio nose extending/wooden/growing sex joke here but I can't seem to give it expression :(

    I know the one.
    Why was Snow White kicked out of Disneyland?
    She was caught sitting on Pinocchio's face shouting "Lie you Bastard!"


  • #4049
    gramar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,045 ✭✭✭✭gramar


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    There's definitely a Pinochio nose extending/wooden/growing sex joke here but I can't seem to give it expression :(

    What did his girlfriend say when Pinnochio was going down on her?
    Lie to me, Pinocchio, lie to me!


  • #4050
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    I googled Pinocchio jokes (the shame) and found this:

    Pinnochio had been getting complaints from his girlfriend. "Every time we make love," she said, "I get splinters." So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gipetto the carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter. "That's what you need." So Pinocchio took some sheets of sandpaper and went home. A few weeks later the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again. "How are you getting on with the girls now?" he asked. "Who needs girls?" said Pinocchio

    I dont get it.....


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  • #4051
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,808 ✭✭✭✭smash


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    I dont get it.....

    Clue... he was ****


This discussion has been closed.
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