Meeting the parents, any horror/hilarious stories?

Arcto · 28-07-2014 10:37PM

Good story but I read it a few years ago online.

Duracell Bunny wrote: »

After a date I walked my then gf home from the pub. We both still lived at home with the folks, and neither of us drove so opportunities for the ol' slap an' tickle were few and far between.

Anyway after we'd walked up her long driveway I was leaning against her porch and we had a goodnight kiss. I was hankering for a bit more so I said "any chance of a blow job?"

She looked a little nervous, and replied

"The neighbours might see"

I reassured her that no-one would be up at this time, and I wouldn't make much noise. Again she voiced her reluctance. Next thing this voice boomed out of nowhere.

"Emma-Jane, either give that man his blow job, or hand job or whatever the bloody hell he wants, or I'll come down and do it myself but either way tell him to stop leaning on the bloody intercom button I've got work in the morning!"

Gillo · 28-07-2014 10:43PM

Arcto wrote: »

Good story but I read it a few years ago online.

It's an urban legend.
But this being the internet it really did happen the person who posted it.

cloud493 · 28-07-2014 10:44PM

Bout a year ago, I dropped something round to my friends, and his girlfriend was there with him with the rest of the family, he asked me to stay for a little while. I didn't know what was going on, but I said alright, so there was myself, him, his bird, and his family ( 5 sisters and a mum and dad) all in the same room, his dad for some reason was making some snide remark about his girlfriend, and he (my friend, the boyfriend) shouts 'SHES ****ING PREGNANT ALRIGHT. WE'RE GONNA MOVE OUT AND RAISE THIS KID AND LOVE EACH SO **** YOU' The girlfriend stands up and says 'I'm sick of you lot looking down at me he's right we're gonna be together forever with our baby'

The dad then went for him, and I had to get in-between them to stop them kicking each others heads in. Good craic.

Frosty McSnowballs · 28-07-2014 10:46PM

I was in the middle of a "girlfriend changeover" and brought my current girlfriend to meet my parents one night.

It was awkward as fcuk as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home. Had to put my incoming girlfriend in the sitting room. They had been best friends up until that point. I had to take turns going room to room and trying to be as casual as possible.

All worked well up until my dad let the cat out of the bag. He kept winking at me with approval and then asked the outgoing girlfriend if she knew the incoming one and he just strolled off into the shed laughing.

Bastard.

LynnGrace · 28-07-2014 10:47PM

Jawgap wrote: »

Foolishly I thought if I managed to do what none of the other boyfriends had done (beat him to the top of the hill) then he might view me more favourably!

I love this

.

raze_them_all_ · 28-07-2014 10:55PM

Arcto wrote: »

Good story but I read it a few years ago online.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZR1O-eio8Y

discus · 28-07-2014 11:16PM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

I was in the middle of a "girlfriend changeover" and brought my current girlfriend to meet my parents one night.

It was awkward as fcuk as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home. Had to put my incoming girlfriend in the sitting room. They had been best friends up until that point. I had to take turns going room to room and trying to be as casual as possible.

All worked well up until my dad let the cat out of the bag. He kept winking at me with approval and then asked the outgoing girlfriend if she knew the incoming one and he just strolled off into the shed laughing.

Bastard.

We need the backstory to that!!

Mickey H · 28-07-2014 11:18PM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

I was in the middle of a "girlfriend changeover" and brought my current girlfriend to meet my parents one night.

It was awkward as fcuk as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home. Had to put my incoming girlfriend in the sitting room. They had been best friends up until that point. I had to take turns going room to room and trying to be as casual as possible.

All worked well up until my dad let the cat out of the bag. He kept winking at me with approval and then asked the outgoing girlfriend if she knew the incoming one and he just strolled off into the shed laughing.

Bastard.

Legend!

corner of hells · 28-07-2014 11:21PM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

I was in the middle of a "girlfriend changeover" and brought my current girlfriend to meet my parents one night.

It was awkward as fcuk as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home. Had to put my incoming girlfriend in the sitting room. They had been best friends up until that point. I had to take turns going room to room and trying to be as casual as possible.

All worked well up until my dad let the cat out of the bag. He kept winking at me with approval and then asked the outgoing girlfriend if she knew the incoming one and he just strolled off into the shed laughing.

Bastard.

Was the outgoing one still alive ? And was your father heading to the shed for a shovel to bury her with ?

beertons · 28-07-2014 11:30PM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

I was in the middle of a "girlfriend changeover" and brought my current girlfriend to meet my parents one night.

It was awkward as fcuk as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home. Had to put my incoming girlfriend in the sitting room. They had been best friends up until that point. I had to take turns going room to room and trying to be as casual as possible.

All worked well up until my dad let the cat out of the bag. He kept winking at me with approval and then asked the outgoing girlfriend if she knew the incoming one and he just strolled off into the shed laughing.

Bastard.

The sh1t stirring git. Brilliant.

Diemos · 28-07-2014 11:31PM

I was visiting an ex girlfriend's house, first time meeting most of her family, so over dinner, my ex asks me "You know those viruses that changes the number of your ISP to a high toll one that leaves you with a massive phone bill, how do you get them?" Odd dinner table talk but I was studying IT at the time so I ran with it. "Probably just downloading dodgy porn." at which point she turns to her older brother and starts giving out to him for looking at porn on the family PC. I didn't know were to look, I'm just thinking, I'm in his bad books already!
A few hours later her mother has drank a fair bit and she comes over and sits beside me and says "My daughter likes you a lot.....if you hurt her I have the money and know the people that can make things happen to you." I wasn't really sure how to react, I'd just been threatened but had also just been told that the girl was into me, which I was chuffed about, so I just sat there with my mouth open until my ex grabbed her mother and marched her out of the room.

The strangest thing is outside of those two incidents the family could not have been nicer to me, lovely family.
But I was never nervous about meeting another girls family after that.

HalloweenJack · 28-07-2014 11:37PM

Jawgap wrote: »

Yeah....... she was always going on about her sisters' boyfriends and telling the stories of the run up the hill. It was something of a family legend. Foolishly (again) I thought I would add to the legend, ingratiate myself with the family while impressing her.

I was never too sure if he just didn't like being beaten.......or if he didn't like being beaten by a Dub.......or if he didn't like being beaten by a rugby player

The da sounds like an absolute eejit, to be fair. Sounds like he always got a kick out of humiliating the younger lads but didn't like the taste of his own medicine. Also, glad to hear you steered clear of her after as it sounds like she picked up this way of thinking from him.

Hotfail.com · 28-07-2014 11:43PM

cloud493 wrote: »

Bout a year ago, I dropped something round to my friends, and his girlfriend was there with him with the rest of the family, he asked me to stay for a little while. I didn't know what was going on, but I said alright, so there was myself, him, his bird, and his family ( 5 sisters and a mum and dad) all in the same room, his dad for some reason was making some snide remark about his girlfriend, and he (my friend, the boyfriend) shouts 'SHES ****ING PREGNANT ALRIGHT. WE'RE GONNA MOVE OUT AND RAISE THIS KID AND LOVE EACH SO **** YOU' The girlfriend stands up and says 'I'm sick of you lot looking down at me he's right we're gonna be together forever with our baby'

The dad then went for him, and I had to get in-between them to stop them kicking each others heads in. Good craic.

What the f*ck is wrong with that family? :pac:

The Cool · 28-07-2014 11:47PM

Not quite a meeting the parents story. Luckily my OH's parents are lovely but they are one of those really catholic families and I, being the dirty protestant that I am, wasn't quite used to all the Jesus paraphernalia around the house. The first time I went to their house, unlike at my gaff I was allowed to sleep in his bed with him; into the bed I hopped, dying for some cuddles (etc

) as I hadn't seen him in a month. Looked up and hanging above the bed was a painting of Jesus set against a scenic landscape surrounded by 7 angel baby heads. Turned out it had been his granny's bedroom until she died, and she had gotten this painting to mark her 7 miscarriages. There was no hanky panky that night!

cloud493 · 29-07-2014 12:30AM

Hotfail.com wrote: »

What the f*ck is wrong with that family? :pac:

Lotta bad feelings, never really talking to each other, etc.

lynski · 29-07-2014 12:34AM

An ex of mine went to the pub to meet my sister before I got off the train one weekend. He had his clothes stolen off the line that day and he didn't even say hello to her just launched into a rant about ****ing nackers (genetic not specific) stealing his gear and the seven kinds of **** he was going to kick out if them. He downed a pint and a short and gave a good colourful rant. My sis had not gotten a word in until he looked at her and the older man sitting next to her with open mouths. The person he thought was some randomer he suddenly realised was actually my dad.

Gandalph · 29-07-2014 01:02PM

I'm sure loads of us have been in the awkward position of meeting your partners parents for dinner...who don't speak English. You try to smile and laugh with the rest of the group, but you have no idea at what.

Had a Russian girl over for dinner recently and didn't know my grandparents would be there. Lets just say they don't thread lightly on current affairs!

jester77 · 29-07-2014 01:05PM

One of the first trips meeting the MIL involved spending a day at an outdoor sauna. Was kind of awkward spending the day naked together.

I Heart Internet · 29-07-2014 01:15PM

Jawgap wrote: »

A previous girlfriend in college took me to see her folks and I trained to meet them.......:)

.......there was a big hill behind their house and she had told me how her Dad (ex inter-county hurler and still fit as f%&k!) liked to invite her and her sister's (there were four girls in the family, no brothers) boyfriends to go for a run with him and then he'd head up the hill and leave them for dead.

So, I was pretty fit but I put in some hillwork before I went to the ol' homestead - he invited me to go for a run (as I expected) and off up the hill we went. I just about beat him to the top and thought this would be a nice bonding moment.......not a bit of it - the ol' git went off in a huff before telling me which way to run back to the house.

The rest of the weekend he barely said a word to me and didn't even bother to see us off - then the girlfriend gets stroppy in the car asking why couldn't I have just let him win and that I wasn't fair to her Dad.......and how I'd upset him.

Suffice to say the relationship didn't survive the drive back to Dublin.

Still glad I won, though!!!:D

He sounds like a right geebag.

Happy to compete as long as he wins. What a loser.

Well done Jawgap!

takamichinoku · 29-07-2014 01:21PM

Oh yeah! My uncle-in-law a few years ago turned up at his daughter's boyfriend's house all shouting and making a scene and threatening to kill him when he heard she was seeing a boy from town (i.e. a boy with no land to his name). Banned her from the home place immediately and the rest of the family from contacting her, with the exception of the mother's wake she hasn't been in the door since.

minotour · 29-07-2014 01:24PM

takamichinoku wrote: »

Oh yeah! My uncle-in-law a few years ago turned up at his daughter's boyfriend's house all shouting and making a scene and threatening to kill him when he heard she was seeing a boy from town (i.e. a boy with no land to his name). Banned her from the home place immediately and the rest of the family from contacting her, with the exception of the mother's wake she hasn't been in the door since.

What in fooks name did that achieve??? He would rather have no daughter than a son-in-law with no land?

I'd say there could be more to that one!

takamichinoku · 29-07-2014 01:34PM

minotour wrote: »

What in fooks name did that achieve??? He would rather have no daughter than a son-in-law with no land?

I'd say there could be more to that one!

Yep, he definitely would. Loads more to it, but it basically boils down to him being a complete nutjob who thinks he's from big people and the son-in-law being from a working class background.

He shipped the rest of the family off to a hotel in Donegal for the duration of the wedding day and would call the hotel every few hours to make sure they were still there.

kfallon · 29-07-2014 02:07PM

Was going out with a girl a few months and we finally decided it was time for me to meet her parents. So she arranged that we'd meet in the pub about 8pm that night. Her brother (who I had met a few times on nights out) comes along too for a while.

The parents arrive along about 8.30pm, brief introduction to the Ma & Da and my ex says to them, "How come ye are so late?" and her brother immediately pipes up and says, "Kfallon said ye were prob down in the house ridin'!!!".....well my jaw dropped, face went bright red and as I was about to protest my innocence when everyone just burst out laughing!

The parents turned out to be two legends, had great time for them and all her family. Her brother was some WUM tho but always made me laugh! But for that 2-3 seconds where I thought they'd think I said that I really wanted the ground to open up and swallow me

UBERTILT · 29-07-2014 02:32PM

Was 15 and going out with this really nice girl.
Asked to come for dinner to her parents house.
Her Dad is a well known Irish sports journalist. Unknowns to me there was a well known Irish radio DJ and a also an infamous Irish soccer pundit in attendance. After dinner the soccer pundit turned to me and said "So, what are your intentions with young Kate?". Rabbit in headlights look of terror from me...

Irish Halo · 29-07-2014 03:38PM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

as my outgoing girlfriend was in the kitchen when I got home.

discus wrote: »

We need the backstory to that!!

Yeah why was your ex (or was she not an ex yet?) in the kitchen?

wp_rathead · 29-07-2014 03:50PM

Nothing too bad or embarrassing as alot of these - just first time I visited an ex's house and met her parents was some family function on- loads of people there- music going and some match on TV that the Dad and uncles were watching. I'd just arrived off the bus and met them, went grand, but I went for shower got out and pulled a cord that I thought was for the electric shower. Ended up blowing fuse box. No Electricity in the house- music off. TV off. Just hear commotion down stairs and I'm there "Ah ****"

Meeting the parents, any horror/hilarious stories?

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