Bull**** stories you heard as a kid

cloud493 · 08-07-2014 07:22PM #1

This thread is dedicated to the innumerable, utter bull****, stories we were all told as children, either by adults or by other kids.

Lies, fibs, tall tales and urban myths: what was the stupidest thing you were ever told?

A lad in my school swore blind you weren't allowed to re-fill a mineral water bottle with tap water. He said you'd get arrested. He was utterly convinced.
Or the one where someone said that the reason a McDonalds burger has the weird gherkin on it, is cos if it wasn't it had so much sugar it'd have to be considered a pudding.

DrumSteve · 08-07-2014 07:22PM

Something about a chap named Jesus.

Lucifer MorningStar · 08-07-2014 07:23PM

Catholicism

wazky · 08-07-2014 07:24PM

Islam

joeguevara · 08-07-2014 07:25PM

Chewing gum is made out of rats tails. Oh and you'd get a girl pregnant if you put your thing in cider. Budweiser was grand though!

Hande hoche! · 08-07-2014 07:25PM

Badgers' penchant for breaking bones.

King George VI · 08-07-2014 07:26PM

If you don't behave the man will come and take you away.

Rough Sleeper · 08-07-2014 07:28PM

You shouldn't get anything from the ice-cream van because the driver didn't wash his hands.

You shouldn't pick up collectible cards/stickers from the ground because dealers laced them with "drugs" to get unwary children hooked.

Humans have venom in their teeth.

Gravity is caused by the earth spinning.

All of these from adults as well.

anewme · 08-07-2014 07:31PM

Another batch here of dont to this or that or THE MAN.......will get you - he must get around!

Another one which terrified us:
A woman in (it was always the neighbouring Estate) had an Alsatian

dog (which by the way we called an Allastation) and she washed it in the bath and then later on she had a bath herself and then nine months later she had pups!

We believed it too.

08-07-2014 07:32PM

anewme wrote: »

A woman in (it was always the neighbouring Estate) had an Alsation dog and she washed it in the bath and then later on she had a bath herself and then nine months later she had pups!

We believed it too.

Was she from Limerick?
I think she died

dodderangler · 08-07-2014 07:33PM

Santa Claus . At least the Easter bunny was real tho

Renegade Mechanic · 08-07-2014 07:33PM

If the wind blows your face will stay that way!!!

joeguevara · 08-07-2014 07:33PM

Rough Sleeper wrote: »

You shouldn't get anything from the ice-cream van because the driver didn't wash his hands.

You shouldn't pick up collectible cards/stickers from the ground because dealers laced them with "drugs" to get unwary children hooked.

Humans have venom in their teeth.

Gravity is caused by the earth spinning.

All of these from adults as well.

The first one was definitely true in the 80s.

The_Valeyard · 08-07-2014 07:36PM

DrumSteve wrote: »

Something about a chap named Jesus.

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

Catholicism

wazky wrote: »

Islam

Well that didn't take long for the usual knives to come out.

The black spot on the tongue if you told a lie.

Or

Staring at the tv turns your eyes square.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy · 08-07-2014 07:36PM

If the cream van was playing music it means he's run out of ice cream.

Shiraz 4.99 · 08-07-2014 07:46PM

Cross your eyes & they could stay like that

Eating apple seeds makes baby trees grow in your tummy

Jonty · 08-07-2014 07:47PM

Jim'll fix it.

Well he certainly did.

cloud493 · 08-07-2014 07:52PM

Swallowing chewing gum makes itself wrap around your heart and could maybe kill you.

murray.eoghan · 08-07-2014 08:16PM

my mother said that if i was noisy on a plane the pilot would strap me to the wing of the plane

DEFTLEFTHAND · 08-07-2014 08:21PM

murray.eoghan wrote: »

my mother said that if i was noisy on a plane the pilot would strap me to the wing of the plane

:D

Cantremember · 08-07-2014 08:26PM

A country and western singer sold 400, 000 tickets for 5 nights in Croker.

Nemeses · 08-07-2014 08:27PM

Cantremember wrote: »

A country and western singer sold 400, 000 tickets for 5 nights in Croker.

Too soon man...

Fox_In_Socks · 08-07-2014 08:29PM

The priest hides behind the altar and will come out from behind it and take you away if you don't quieten down.

This was said to me to quieten me down while my mother was having a good ole pray but I thought it was hilarious as a 3 year old and started laughing and shouting even more.

PizzamanIRL · 08-07-2014 08:29PM

If your tongue is black it means you're telling lies.

Fox_In_Socks · 08-07-2014 08:34PM

The fellow from primary school who was allowed drive his father's tractor and trailer on the road (as a 9 year old).

Little Lion Woman · 08-07-2014 10:49PM

Eating crusts of bread makes your hair go curly.

B.A._Baracus · 08-07-2014 11:01PM

DrumSteve wrote: »

Something about a chap named Jesus.

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

Catholicism

Seriously?
Whats with boards.ie or should say After Hours?

Like the thread was made at 7:22pm and that same minute the first reply was taking a popshot at religion? Did you even read the op Drumsteve or couldnt you reply quick enough from reading the thread title?

There are so many pops against religion on here. We get it. Alot of people here are athiest. Who cares

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy · 08-07-2014 11:06PM

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Seriously?
Whats with boards.ie or should say After Hours?

Like the thread was made at 7:22pm and that same minute the first reply was taking a popshot at religion? Did you even read the op Drumsteve or couldnt you reply quick enough from reading the thread title?

There are so many pops against religion on here. We get it. Alot of people here are athiest. Who cares

I call them the God Squad.

Sir Osis of Liver. · 08-07-2014 11:06PM

**** makes you go blind.

SpoonJar JarSpoon · 08-07-2014 11:06PM

wazky wrote: »

Islam

thumbs up to this guy tho' ^

LETHAL LADY · 08-07-2014 11:09PM

On Halloween night if you sit in a darkened room with a lit candle, while combing your hair and looking into a mirror, your future husband will appear behind you.
If it was true I'd have married a man who looked like my mother dressed as a farmer.

Bull**** stories you heard as a kid

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