Unhappy relationships - do you stay or do you go?

Muise... · 22-05-2014 05:59PM

AudreyHepburn wrote: »

I wonder though would people be so quick to judge if she was the one that ended it?

You mean you don't have an actual example of people not judging a woman in his position to support the engagement-ending judgey gender imbalance theory you're peddling?

pow wow · 22-05-2014 06:19PM

Pretty sure he would have had an inkling before the invites were sent out! It's his timing that's lousy, not the fact that he doesn't want to get married (either to her or at all).

shopaholic01 · 22-05-2014 07:21PM

I'd imagine that sending out the wedding invites focuses the mind and it suddenly becomes very real. He's only 25, better to back out at the last minute than stand at the altar with doubts or regrets.

Celly Smunt · 22-05-2014 07:28PM

I dont know if its been mentioned, but generally it is the mans job to propose (generally). A man should never lead a woman all the way upto marriage if there os any doubt at all. I think thats where the cowardly impression comes from.

Shakespeare's Sister · 23-05-2014 12:41AM

AudreyHepburn wrote: »

So he should be selfless and marry her even though it's bound to go wrong down the line?

Crikey. Just *where* did you read that in what they said...?

I find the interest in this "story" bizarre (yes I know I'm talking about it now though

) I thought this stuff was only limited to celebs and soap stars and that, not a reasonably known golfer and his lesser known tennis-player ex.

I even heard it being talked about in quite in-depth detail on Matt Cooper the other evening. Two 20-somethings break off their engagement - er... stop the press!

I didn't hear anything in the snippet I heard, about animosity towards Rory - just sympathy towards both people. I agree with others about the sympathy being towards the person who gets dumped, and can't understand the confidence that people have that a woman dumping him would be celebrated. I'd have thought a man being dumped would also get sympathy?
Serious obsession with pitting the genders against one another on this site.

And nobody, man or woman, "should" stay in a relationship they're unhappy in. It's not always easy to get out of it though, but the ideal would be for them to end things.

ratmouse · 23-05-2014 12:52AM

pow wow wrote: »

Pretty sure he would have had an inkling before the invites were sent out! It's his timing that's lousy, not the fact that he doesn't want to get married (either to her or at all).

Not necessarily. It's possible that his feelings changed out of nowhere. It can actually happen that way, almost like a light bulb moment where you realize that you don't love the person anymore.

Witchie · 23-05-2014 03:54AM

Maybe she had been pushing for the engagement and he went with it rather than lose her and when the invites went out it just all felt so real that he couldn't go on coz he knew he just wasn't ready for that level of commitment.

I feel sorry for them both as it is never nice to break up with some you care for and even if he wasn't enough in love with her to marry her I do think he must have cared about her or they wouldn't have made it to engagement stage at all.

Its rougher for them too by being in the public eye but am sure they will both get through it like the rest of us mere mortals do and in a few years down the line will be married to someone else and all will be forgotten about.

Adamantium · 23-05-2014 05:37AM

Thread needs this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3BY72RF8vc

WilyCoyote · 24-05-2014 01:19AM

As far as I remember, she posted a pic of him sleeping. I think that was a bit mean. Like showing off the kudos to her friends (and ultimately the world). Sleeping in your own home is a private thing. It's not like someone snapped him as he snoozed in a plane, airport or some other public place.
Am sure the Freudians on boards.ie can give a reasonable explanation for her action.

Unhappy relationships - do you stay or do you go?

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