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is porn really that bad for us?

13567

Comments

  • #62
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    Russ T Banger wrote: »
    I disagree, people dont watch porn for the bodies, just for the acts


    Some people watch porn for the acts, some people watch porn for the bodies, BBW porn being just one example, and quite a popular one at that.

    The fact of the matter is that like most things, the generation before always thinks the next generation is over-exposed to influences that will corrupt them. Elvis was thought to be the devil incarnate when young girls would wet themselves when he swivelled his hips. But porn in various mediums has been pushing the boundaries of socially acceptable behavior since the dawn of man.

    The problem isn't porn, the problem is the people who are viewing porn. Back when I was young, a jpeg of Cindy Crawford on a floppy disc in a swimsuit was as close to porn as I got, and when I got access to the internet on dial-up, sure that was the beginning of the end too... except it wasn't really.

    Anal sex among heterosexual people has long been seen as a method of avoiding pregnancy, so hardly anything new about it. It was as mainstream back then as it is now, only difference being that now it' just more readily available, like anything else you can think of in Western World "Convenience Culture".

    Personally speaking, I don't know what to believe any more - one special interest group is telling us we're all getting fatter, another special interest group is lamenting the fact that we're all having too much sex...

    I would've thought encouraging people to have more sex would be a great way to entice fat people to burn off the calories!


  • #63
    catallus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,106 ✭✭✭catallus


    There's just so much of it! Giggitygiggity!


  • #64
    Legs.Eleven
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,987 ✭✭✭Legs.Eleven


    I watch it now and then but a lot of it is ridiculously farcical and makes me laugh instead of horny. I prefer my own imagination tbh.


  • #65
    Aidric
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,597 ✭✭✭✭Aidric


    Nowt wrong with it, bit of escapism.

    That Lisa Ann mot doesn't half distort the milf searches though.


  • #66
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    Legs.Eleven wrote: »
    I watch it now and then but a lot of it is ridiculously farcical and makes me laugh instead of horny. I prefer my own imagination tbh.

    I only watch it for the ridiculous plot holes and continuity errors.


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  • #67
    orangesoda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,223 ✭✭✭orangesoda


    I think it is bad, I was looking at page 3 today in the daily star, a lovely 21 year old geordie topless, i was sad how it didn't effect me at all, not even a semi, it takes a video compilation of HD latina booty and facials to excite me a small bit nowadays


  • #68
    carzony
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,852 ✭✭✭carzony


    orangesoda wrote: »
    I think it is bad, I was looking at page 3 today in the sun, i was sad how it didn't effect me at all, not even a semi, it takes a video compilation of HD latina booty and facials to excite me a small bit nowadays

    Have to say, I was i college the other day and it frightened me how picky I was when looking at the women.. I think it's the perfect asses and tits in them porn vids :(:(:( i'm expecting to much..


  • #69
    orangesoda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,223 ✭✭✭orangesoda


    carzony wrote: »
    Have to say, I was i college the other day and it frightened me how picky I was when looking at the women.. I think it's the perfect asses and tits in them porn vids :(:(:( i'm expecting to much..

    it has changed my interests a lot, i was always a titty man, then a pussy man but over the last few years i've become a mega arse man, i think it is the change of fashion, with tight leggings or something


  • #70
    The Th!ng
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 464 ✭✭The Th!ng


    During the mid 70's in the UK Mary Whitehouse's anti porn crusade prompted David Sullivan to publish a new porno mag called Whitehouse.


  • #71
    Davarus Walrus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,280 ✭✭✭Davarus Walrus


    I'm of a slightly older generation, but from reading reports in newspapers, there seems to be a lot of men in their 20's who are addicted to watching gonzo movies while trying to pull the skeleton out of themselves. Completely unrealistic perspective on sex. Some really vile stuff out there, even on the front pages of those tube sites. Must really start to mangle the minds of men who spend most evenings playing with themselves while watching it.

    Then they go out and haven't a clue on how to have a meet a woman for some real life 'the beast with two backs'.

    It's worrying.


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  • #72
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 25,909 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    My friend's brother is 16 and he and his friends are all a bit more "worldly" than we would've been and are online constantly and don't seem to be having any issues with having female friends and finding dates and the like. But it's not scary to mention that.


  • #73
    bogwalrus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,456 ✭✭✭bogwalrus


    If it wasn't for porn I wouldn't be able to last the whole three minutes.


  • #74
    The Wild Bunch
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,855 ✭✭✭The Wild Bunch


    EVA ANGELINA


  • #75
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    Davarus Walrus wrote: »
    I'm of a slightly older generation, but from reading reports in newspapers, there seems to be a lot of men in their 20's who are addicted to watching gonzo movies while trying to pull the skeleton out of themselves. Completely unrealistic perspective on sex. Some really vile stuff out there, even on the front pages of those tube sites. Must really start to mangle the minds of men who spend most evenings playing with themselves while watching it.

    Then they go out and haven't a clue on how to have a meet a woman for some real life 'the beast with two backs'.

    It's worrying.

    I think that is it, it's not 'Porn' that is the problem, as much as the 'content' of many porn movies that give an unrealistic and often unobtainable view of what sex is about. Sex should be about mutual pleasure and compromise. It's more about absorbing yourself in the senses and enjoying the moment, than acting it out and 'performing'.

    Of course with every aspect of life there are compromises to be made, but again porn doesn't seem to show this. Everyone seems to be up for everything and water off a ducks back. Unfortunately in real life we don't get 20 takes, men that can last for hours and a bum made of sponge!


  • #76
    Daveysil15
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    I'm surprised Eramen hasn't made a contribution yet.


  • #77
    Blisterman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 7,530 ✭✭✭Blisterman


    Whenever the topic of porn comes up, there's always comments along the lines of "it gives people an unrealistic expectation of sex and/or women's bodies, as if this is a major problem.

    But surely, even if people are left with these expectations, they're not going to persist very long once someone actually has sex. They'll either have to accept reality or stop having sex. I've a pretty good idea which one out of those two they'll end up doing.


  • #78
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    Blisterman wrote: »
    Whenever the topic of porn comes up, there's always comments along the lines of "it gives people an unrealistic expectation of sex and/or women's bodies, as if this is a major problem.

    But surely, even if people are left with these expectations, they're not going to persist very long once someone actually has sex. They'll either have to accept reality or stop having sex. I've a pretty good idea which one out of those two they'll end up doing.

    You're assuming everyone has access to sex. I know of one person who is in his 50's and hasn't had sex since he was a teenager and relies on porn for his relief. He is not in a position that without the visual stimulation he can't complete the task and he isn't satisfied if things are not played out the way he is used to.

    With regards to young people, it has been documented that men have certain expectations of women that are unrealistic and attempt to push them beyond their boundaries and a lot of young ladies feeling that pushing those boundaries is now the 'norm' cross their own comfort zone, believing if they don't, they won't be able to keep their boyfriend.

    I'm also talking as unrealistic with regards to things like 'deep throat', which may be fine for the experienced lady, but for a young girl who is just embarking on a sexual life? Yet guys watching porn will and do want it and don't realise pushing on a woman is bloody dangerous and could set her back years if done too aggressively. Or she may choose to abstain full stop in fear of being hurt again.

    Not all sexual encounters are done between people that 'care' for each other and respect each others sexual boundaries and impressionable people are led by what they see and hear.

    I'm glad that I grew up before porn became what it is today. It's not just too easy to find, but the genres are too explicit and due to competition often stretch the boundaries sexually in an attempt to become the most viewed.

    I'm sure a lot of discovery and experimentation goes along with porn, but you need to be ready for it, in order to view it for what it is and not be taken in by a lot of the stuff that just wouldn't or couldn't happen in real life.


  • #79
    Kuhlschrank
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2 ✭Kuhlschrank


    CK73 wrote: »
    You're assuming everyone has access to sex. I know of one person who is in his 50's and hasn't had sex since he was a teenager and relies on porn for his relief. He is not in a position that without the visual stimulation he can't complete the task and he isn't satisfied if things are not played out the way he is used to.

    With regards to young people, it has been documented that men have certain expectations of women that are unrealistic and attempt to push them beyond their boundaries and a lot of young ladies feeling that pushing those boundaries is now the 'norm' cross their own comfort zone, believing if they don't, they won't be able to keep their boyfriend.

    I'm also talking as unrealistic with regards to things like 'deep throat', which may be fine for the experienced lady, but for a young girl who is just embarking on a sexual life? Yet guys watching porn will and do want it and don't realise pushing on a woman is bloody dangerous and could set her back years if done too aggressively. Or she may choose to abstain full stop in fear of being hurt again.

    Not all sexual encounters are done between people that 'care' for each other and respect each others sexual boundaries and impressionable people are led by what they see and hear.

    I'm glad that I grew up before porn became what it is today. It's not just too easy to find, but the genres are too explicit and due to competition often stretch the boundaries sexually in an attempt to become the most viewed.

    I'm sure a lot of discovery and experimentation goes along with porn, but you need to be ready for it, in order to view it for what it is and not be taken in by a lot of the stuff that just wouldn't or couldn't happen in real life.

    If an individual wants to try something they saw in porn then I don't see the problem so long as all participants are consenting.

    Why does no one say we shouldn't watch soccer because it's "unrealistic"? Most people could never play soccer to the level of those seen on television.


  • #80
    Pinch Flat
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,779 ✭✭✭Pinch Flat


    When you pull out early and shoot a load on the missus's face, you're probably watching too much


  • #81
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    Kuhlschrank wrote: »
    If an individual wants to try something they saw in porn then I don't see the problem so long as all participants are consenting.

    Why does no one say we shouldn't watch soccer because it's "unrealistic"? Most people could never play soccer to the level of those seen on television.

    You're not really understanding what I'm getting at. I am more addressing the fact that the desire for something unobtainable can destroy an otherwise good and healthy expectation, to the point where 'regular' sex will never hit the mark and the person never feels sexually fulfilled, because their expectations have been warped.

    Christ, there are many couples that don't even manage the basics, due to indoctrination through religion and then they have expectations of anal, bdsm and various other things thrown into the mix.

    Of course there is nothing wrong with 2 consenting adults experimenting, but often this is one sided, as generally women tend not to watch porn as much as men do and when they do, they tend to go for softer material, that has more of a story line to it.

    I can't speak for anyone else, but the kind of porn where a gang of guys roll up in a van, pick up a woman off the street, have sex with her in various ways with no real consideration for her and no respect at all and throw her back onto the street when they're finished, is the most popular kind of porn for girls.

    Okay, so it's fantasy, but geeze, why does it always have to involve anal? Anal really isn't something that should be taken lightly (or it should if you think about it!), but seriously, more std's due to the skin being so thin there, more tears, for the same reason, it can be very painful and there is nothing to prepare people for that.

    Plus you have stuff like golden showers and hard sports all there to be seen by anyone of any age and it's being normalised. These are niche market things, but open to anyone and it can warp your sense of expectation.

    Of course anyone can do what they want in private, but the point is, this is not private and people ARE impressionable, especially at a certain age.


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  • #82
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    Pinch Flat wrote: »
    When you pull out early and shoot a load on the missus's face, you're probably watching too much

    That made me laugh! lol


  • #83
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    CK73 wrote: »
    With regards to young people, it has been documented that men have certain expectations of women that are unrealistic and attempt to push them beyond their boundaries and a lot of young ladies feeling that pushing those boundaries is now the 'norm' cross their own comfort zone, believing if they don't, they won't be able to keep their boyfriend.


    But haven't young people been pushing boundaries since time began? Even when it comes to sex?

    Both genders have unrealistic expectations, but through maturity as they reach adulthood and experience with the opposite or even the same sex, they learn that their expectations were predicated on fantasy. Only a very small proportion will hold on to their unrealistic expectations into adulthood, and that would show a lack of maturity in the person rather than blaming the existence of the thing which enables their immature and unrealistic expectations.

    Acts depicted in porn are inspired by people who are not actors, not the other way around, and what people see on film, it could well have been inspired by your next door neighbour who pushed the boundaries.

    If the whole argument that "young people are becoming exposed to unrealistic acts which gives them a false sense of perspective", is to have any merit, then you must also accept that young people are also becoming exposed to unrealistic acts which inspire them to experiment and make those fantasies a reality.

    Man travelling to the moon for instance, I'll bet Galileo didn't see that coming!


  • #84
    Kuhlschrank
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2 ✭Kuhlschrank


    CK73 wrote: »
    You're not really understanding what I'm getting at. I am more addressing the fact that the desire for something unobtainable can destroy an otherwise good and healthy expectation, to the point where 'regular' sex will never hit the mark and the person never feels sexually fulfilled, because their expectations have been warped.

    Christ, there are many couples that don't even manage the basics, due to indoctrination through religion and then they have expectations of anal, bdsm and various other things thrown into the mix.

    Of course there is nothing wrong with 2 consenting adults experimenting, but often this is one sided, as generally women tend not to watch porn as much as men do and when they do, they tend to go for softer material, that has more of a story line to it.

    I can't speak for anyone else, but the kind of porn where a gang of guys roll up in a van, pick up a woman off the street, have sex with her in various ways with no real consideration for her and no respect at all and throw her back onto the street when they're finished, is the most popular kind of porn for girls.

    Okay, so it's fantasy, but geeze, why does it always have to involve anal? Anal really isn't something that should be taken lightly (or it should if you think about it!), but seriously, more std's due to the skin being so thin there, more tears, for the same reason, it can be very painful and there is nothing to prepare people for that.

    Plus you have stuff like golden showers and hard sports all there to be seen by anyone of any age and it's being normalised. These are niche market things, but open to anyone and it can warp your sense of expectation.

    Of course anyone can do what they want in private, but the point is, this is not private and people ARE impressionable, especially at a certain age.

    Is there any evidence that watching such extreme porn actually makes the viewer want to try it.

    Personally speaking I much prefer amateur porn.


  • #85
    GarIT
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,641 ✭✭✭GarIT


    I could never understand the problem people have with porn. 95% of it is realistic and the other 5% involves tentacles and animals.

    I often wonder how people can say its unrealistic but still manage to hold down a relationship, how boring must their life be?


  • #86
    Maphisto
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,014 ✭✭✭Maphisto


    Kuhlschrank wrote: »
    Is there any evidence that watching such extreme porn actually makes the viewer want to try it.

    Personally speaking I much prefer amateur porn.

    I agree is there any evidence about violent films or video games?

    There is probably no agreed definition of what porn is. The old definition of a capability to corrupt has largely fallen away. There are some art films that show a lot of flesh but are they porn?
    In their day some of the Carry On films were described as soft porn but now it is difficult to understand how.


  • #87
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    GarIT wrote: »
    I could never understand the problem people have with porn. 95% of it is realistic and the other 5% involves tentacles and animals.

    I often wonder how people can say its unrealistic but still manage to hold down a relationship, how boring must their life be?

    Mine isn't boring lol, neither is my sex life, but I know a lot of guys would like to try things they won't get in their relationships and it is directly inspired by having watched porn. There are also some that can not enjoy sex, unless there is porn playing in the background and I'm sorry, but for me that is a big turn off!


  • #88
    Penny Tration
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,687 ✭✭✭✭Penny Tration


    While I agree that porn can give young people a really unrealistic view of sex, most people cop on to themselves by adulthood.

    Tmi bit here: I didn't receive sex ed in school, because parents voted against it and the nuns just told us about periods instead.

    So, when I first looked at porn (at a very young age tbh), i thought that's what sex was like, full of anal, facials, bit of bondage, etc.

    Thing is, because I thought that that was how it was supposed to be, I tried that stuff. My previous partners thankfully were adult enough to realise porn is unrealistic, so, aside from a bit of bbadgering to try anal, they were happy with 'normal' sex.

    But, because I wanted to try all of the things I'd seen in porn, I found out that actually, I love doing a lot of the stuff I've watched. Anal is a no no, but things like facials, deep throating, bondage, small amounts of pain (hair pulling and the like), objectification, I like it. I wouldn't have realised I'd like that stuff had it not been for watching porn and deciding to try it, because most of my previous partners were pretty vanilla in bed.

    So, while it gives teens unrealistic expectations, it can be a learning tool, giving ideas for things to try, things some people may really enjoy.


  • #89
    Czarcasm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,076 ✭✭✭✭Czarcasm


    GarIT wrote: »
    I could never understand the problem people have with porn. 95% of it is realistic and the other 5% involves tentacles and animals.

    I often wonder how people can say its unrealistic but still manage to hold down a relationship, how boring must their life be?

    I would've thought the more mature perspective is recognising that 100% of porn is complete fantasy and escapism? I mean, isn't that the point being made by the "porn=bad for young people" camp that young people see porn as some sort of instruction manual? Most young people are all too aware that porn is indeed fantasy, and that Mary down the road really isn't going to be up for double anal when she has a girlfriend already (just one plausible scenario before anyone gets their tits in a twist).

    The whole point of recognising that porn is fantasy is what enables our escapism and experimentation, which is quite the opposite of the boring life and also how they manage to hold down relationships as opposed to those people who are immature enough to believe that porn in any way reflects reality.


  • #90
    EoghanIRL
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭EoghanIRL


    But you can earn " up to 5 thousand dollars a day"...


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  • #91
    CK73
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 410 ✭✭CK73


    Kuhlschrank wrote: »
    Is there any evidence that watching such extreme porn actually makes the viewer want to try it.

    Personally speaking I much prefer amateur porn.

    I'm sure the majority are able to watch it and not take it any further, but there will always be those that do and unfortunately unlike aspiring to be the man on the moon, you are directly dealing with another person, who may not be so enthusiastic and may not be enjoying it, even if initially having given consent. You often hear of girls agreeing to have sex due to peer pressure, but it's not just sex any more, it's anal, water sports, facials etc, etc and it really does need to be both parties wanting to do these things equally.

    Generally before this kind of stuff became so open and easy to obtain, people that were motivated by these things, found each other through like minded groups and there was no confusion with the fact all present were interested, but it's been watered down now and with it, people who are not so interested or even knowledgeable find themselves being compromised by it. This is my point.

    I don't think sex should be hidden away and made out to be a bad thing, as I think it's great! However, I do think that the more hardcore the porn, the harder it should be for people to get hold of. You should really want it and be able to prove your age before being able to see it and not just stumble across it when putting a word like 'sport' into a search engine.


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