Beggars with elaborate back stories

cloud493 · 19-03-2014 12:51PM #1

Fair play to them like. Their ability to weave several plot holes into a story that lasts 15 seconds is quite remarkable. They're like Christopher Nolan, but on smack. The ones who are like, 'Have you got a euro to drive my sister to a hospital in Belfast' or 'I need busfare cos I fell asleep at the bus stop and my son was coming to pick me up but he got lost and ran out of petrol. Give them props for trying.

Son Of A Vidic · 19-03-2014 01:00PM

Misleading thread title, I thought this thread was about the banks we bailed out.

Birneybau · 19-03-2014 01:17PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Misleading thread title, I thought this thread was about the banks we bailed out.

Zzzzz

Putin · 19-03-2014 01:18PM

Birneybau wrote: »

Zzzzz

Let me guess, you're probably a sheep?

Ruu · 19-03-2014 01:23PM

Have ya got 50p for a taxi, just out of prison. Driver wont even stop for 50p!

YFlyer · 19-03-2014 01:24PM

Putin wrote: »

Let me guess, you're probably a sheep?

Its steep

jester77 · 19-03-2014 01:25PM

There is one guy I see that goes to a lot of effort. He says he is from an eastern EU country, can't remember which one think it was Hungary, and he is just after arriving here to meet his mate. His mate has not shown up and he needs some money for a train ticket to travel to his mates but he only has his local currency. The lad is all dressed up in hiking gear with a backpack and all. He shows up once a year for a few days, but it is always the same story. One of the lads one year said he would exchange money with him at the going rate as he was going to his country the following week. He didn't seem too happy handing over the currency, probably killed his scam

efb · 19-03-2014 01:26PM

Bus to Carlow

Wtf would you want to go to Carlow???

But he was cute so I gave him €10 for a quick hand job

Donkey Oaty · 19-03-2014 01:26PM

I like it when beggars put a big of time and effort into their presentation. Can't find a link to the RTE 1970s health and safety ad, so here's this instead.

Putin · 19-03-2014 01:26PM

YFlyer wrote: »

Its steep

Its? I think you meant - It's steep.

The Backwards Man · 19-03-2014 01:29PM

I love walking round dodgy areas, rspecially in the northeast of England, you get the young scrotes in a gang on the pavement up ahead, one shouts something like 'can you lend me 5 pence for the train?' (yeah right) I reply in my rough Nordy accent 'Jesus I've no change on me hi' and you say their whole aggressive demeanour fade away.

OldNotWIse · 19-03-2014 01:29PM

Outside a pub having a cigarette one evening. Some breed of something approaches asking for the usual coins, cigarettes, shirt off our backs etc. He pulls up his sleeve to show us a tattoo and says, "See? I'm genu-whine like" - tf? Go away you complete waste of space drain on society. You get enough mickey money to buy your own fuucking fags.

Vandango · 19-03-2014 01:54PM

Birneybau wrote: »

Zzzzz

Pathetic.

kjl · 19-03-2014 02:43PM

have you got 20c for a pint?? I gave him 40 and said have 2.

Birneybau · 19-03-2014 02:52PM

Putin wrote: »

Let me guess, you're probably a sheep?

Baa

Vandango wrote: »

Pathetic.

Oh god, the freemen are on to me.

Ficheall · 19-03-2014 03:06PM

My first evening in Birmingham, walking into town, I was approached by a guy who had what appeared to be blood streaming down his face, who said he'd just been mugged and asked for two quid for the bus home.
I was sceptical, but impressed with the act anyway, so didn't mind giving him the money.

topper75 · 19-03-2014 03:19PM

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

I like it when beggars put a big of time and effort into their presentation. Can't find a link to the RTE 1970s health and safety ad, so here's this instead.

Those ads would be youtube gold nowadays.

"John, did you put the cat out?"

Banjo String · 19-03-2014 03:41PM

Knock knock.

Vandango · 19-03-2014 03:44PM

Birneybau wrote: »

Oh god, the freemen are on to me.

Freemen? Oh no not those idiots, they're nearly as bad as childish muppets who find it all so Zzzzzz with any mention of the shafting this country took.

iDave · 19-03-2014 03:44PM

Wish they put in a bit more effort with me, usually 'spare change pleeez'. If I'm lucky I get told its for a hostel.

The Backwards Man · 19-03-2014 03:44PM

Banjo String wrote: »

Knock knock.

Come in if your good-looking.

Banjo String · 19-03-2014 03:46PM

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Come in if your good-looking.

I'm a gorgeous Bastard.

Banjo String · 19-03-2014 03:47PM

The Backwards Man wrote: »

edit; now you deleted your post and made me look like an ididot.:( As if I need any help like. :P

No its still there.

Try again so.

Knock knock.

The Backwards Man · 19-03-2014 03:47PM

Banjo String wrote: »

No its still there.

Try again so.

Knock knock.

Come in if your good-looking.

Birneybau · 19-03-2014 03:54PM

Vandango wrote: »

Freemen? Oh no not those idiots, they're nearly as bad as childish muppets who find it all so Zzzzzz with any mention of the shafting this country took.

Of which I have paid a lot of tax, usc etc.

Are you ever going to let it go?

Somebody starts a thread "My house got burgled", always guaranteed there'll be some lazy wag, "Was it Fianna Fail". Fcuking pub bores.

elefant · 19-03-2014 03:59PM

Ruubot2 wrote: »

Have ya got 50p for a taxi, just out of prison. Driver wont even stop for 50p!

Poor fecker must have been in prison for aaaages.

Sh1tbag OToole · 19-03-2014 04:02PM

iDave wrote: »

Wish they put in a bit more effort with me, usually 'spare change pleeez'. If I'm lucky I get told its for a hostel.

I'll try that next time on holidays. More to spend on drink if I dont have to pay for the hostel myself

WilyCoyote · 19-03-2014 04:04PM

Banjo String wrote: »

No its still there.

Try again so.

Knock knock.

WTF is there?

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy · 19-03-2014 04:05PM

Outside Goodison Park in Liverpool. Dude approaches holding a broken car key. Says he's locked his young daughter in the car, and he's looking for £10 to get a taxi home and pick up the spare set.

"Will the police not help you?" We asked.

"No, they can't help"

"There's a young girl locked in a car on a hot day like today, and not any of the policemen on matchday duty, standing all round us, will help you out?!!!!"

"No, that's why I'm asking yous for help"

"Yeah alright. Show us the car and we'll smash a window for ya"

The beggar walked off in a huff

WilyCoyote · 19-03-2014 04:06PM

Ficheall wrote: »

My first evening in Birmingham, walking into town, I was approached by a guy who had what appeared to be blood streaming down his face, who said he'd just been mugged and asked for two quid for the bus home.
I was sceptical, but impressed with the act anyway, so didn't mind giving him the money.

Probably a sachet of Tomato Ketchup from the local drop-in centre, you daft bar steward

gramar · 19-03-2014 04:10PM

There was a woman in Madrid airport about 3 years ago who came over to tell me and a friend that she'd missed her plane to Argentina and needed money to buy another ticket. I told her to get lost but we were amazed to see two different people within 30 seconds give her notes!

A few months later she tried again with me and I told that she needs to get her act together and start getting to the airport on time.

The last time was last month. This time she was sitting near one of those mechanical walkways in the T2 building counting loads of notes!

Who keeps getting taken in by this and why haven't airport police booted her out?

Beggars with elaborate back stories

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