The worst thing you got clobbered with

looking_around · 20-12-2013 05:27PM

I had my nose whacked with a "lollipop stick"(you know those wardens use for crossing)

Back in School, they organised the 6th class kids to take part in "wardens". 3 on either end. All standing there, Person in the middle swinging the stick like some toy, when next thing I know I'm hit with this sharp pain and my knees buckle.
Still surprised my nose wasn't broken.

hefferboi · 20-12-2013 05:30PM

One of my friends got an empty keg across the head on a night out. Some lad just picked it up and fcuked it at him.

old hippy · 20-12-2013 05:31PM

Well, it was the 70s and me and my mate were playing lightsabres, except his was a genuine toy but mine was improvised - a heavy wooden shoe horn. And I managed to whack myself in the mouth. Blood everywhere!

joe stodge · 20-12-2013 05:34PM

Got a smack of a bud bottle repeatedly around the head, by a couple of local scrotes for the hell of it.
I was walking home from a 24hr garage and they pulled up in a car behind me and clobbered me in the back of the head with it, I went down and the kept hitting me. A taxi man pulled in and chased them off.
I was lucky the bottle didn't smash at all.

20-12-2013 05:43PM

I one almost got hit in the balls by a pool ball while someone was attempting a trick shot. It missed by a few centimetres and hit me in the thigh.

When I was in secondary school, some guy got hit across the head with a Buckfast bottle. For the next week or so, he had a huge indentation of the letter 'B' on his forehead.

RichT · 20-12-2013 05:44PM

'Smithy Robinson' would win this thread ...............

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=naGOZoHxA-I

BMMachine · 20-12-2013 05:45PM

a crazy golf putter

Gran Hermano · 20-12-2013 05:48PM

Tax bill.

Lock Knife · 20-12-2013 06:44PM

old hippy wrote: »

Well, it was the 70s and me and my mate were playing lightsabres, except his was a genuine toy but mine was improvised - a heavy wooden shoe horn. And I managed to whack myself in the mouth. Blood everywhere!

Illusion of you being an old head ruined

What the hell age are you or did that happen on some wild acid trip - the Star Wars 1977 limited edition blotted paper :pac:

Ms. Pingui · 20-12-2013 06:55PM

My sister walloped me over the head with a massive encyclopaedia when we were kids. Hurt like hell!

Auldloon · 23-12-2013 10:39AM

superelliptic wrote: »

Whaa? Do not get...

He hit you with it?

Yup clatter on the head with the barrels! There was quiet a shock factor!

anncoates · 23-12-2013 11:09AM

My mother whacked me on the arse with a shoe a few times as a kid.

My sister knocked me unconscious with a saucepan before during a fight.

Got hit with a big rock, baseball bat and hurley before in various scraps as a kid.

zcorpian88 · 23-12-2013 12:21PM

Wooden spoon, that yoke stung!

smurgen · 23-12-2013 12:46PM

A mars bar ice cream that was in the bottom of freezer for about six months.sister picked it up and lashed it off me temple in the middle of a fight.I would have throttled her soon afterwards but I could barely see after it.

Hande hoche! · 23-12-2013 12:46PM

nollag007 wrote: »

Worse thing I got clobbered by was a hammer... During soccer training.

I'm intrigued, how did that happen?

osarusan · 23-12-2013 01:02PM

Boxing glove with a fist inside it. The fist was moving very fast.

YellowFeather · 23-12-2013 03:53PM

Football in the groin!!

There was even a film made about it.

knarkypants · 23-12-2013 04:52PM

A see-saw, right in the face. Required stitches and can still see the scar.

bnt · 23-12-2013 04:56PM

My own bike, back in 1991. I hit a chain stretched across a normally-open gap, the bike stopped and I hit it. The gear shifters went through my front teeth.

agriman27 · 23-12-2013 05:15PM

I got clobbered by a crazy 350kg bull calf in a cattle mart. Was very lucky didn't smash my knee, but I did have to dig a massive pebble out of it however it got through my jeans

Daveysil15 · 23-12-2013 05:21PM

I got hit with a black cat when I was younger. The banger that is, not an actual cat.

agriman27 · 23-12-2013 05:28PM

Daveysil15 wrote: »

I got hit with a black cat when I was younger. The banger that is, not an actual cat.

Was that painful often wondered were they really that dangerous, used to have great crack with fireworks years ago

Gavin "shels" · 23-12-2013 05:29PM

Corner of an old VHS box, with a VHS inside! Probably the sorest thing ever!

ra0044 · 23-12-2013 05:30PM

Worst ever was gettng hit full force over my back wih a riding whip by my mates sister when i was 12. She wanted t know if it hurt her horse when she whipped it and decided to try it on me. Crazy girl she was.

Another incident happened whilst caddying for my dad on our local golf course when i stepped out from behind a large bush after having a piss. Got hit square in the chest by a golf ball hit by a fat lad with a 3 wood off the floor. Went down like i was shot. Remember looking up to see a face with a long white beard looking down on me with a hand out stretched and for a panicky moment thinking it was god and i had died before realising it was dads mate Bob helping me up.

Also got headbutted by a skinny little bast??rd in a pub for supposedly looking at his girlfriend. The pain was shocking but remained on my feet long enough to see him fall over unconcious and knock his ugly missus off her stool before i had to sit down and try not to throw up.

Daveysil15 · 23-12-2013 05:51PM

agriman27 wrote: »

Was that painful often wondered were they really that dangerous, used to have great crack with fireworks years ago

It was, it hit me with a lot of force in the jaw, but thankfully it didn't go off. My mates were always big into the bangers but I secretly used to hate them. People throwing bangers at each other and setting off rockets under cars - wasn't my thing. It's a lot different now though. There's not nearly as many fireworks at Halloween now, or at least not in my area anyway.

myshirt · 07-01-2014 10:23PM

Got hit with a shovel, a proper shovel, cracked my skull, staples in my head;
got hit over the head with a cement block; stabbed with a fork; knuckle duster right on the kisser by a heavy lad; head got stuck in a spike

All hurt.

Nearly got hit with an axe into the knee

Worst one is a friend of mine who got done with a slash hook, chest down to his waistline, he was f*cked for a good 6 weeks at least

ablelocks · 07-01-2014 10:59PM

horse kick to the hip. don't know how it wasn't broken.

worst near miss was a hammer thrown across the metal work room by the teacher. lucky for me his eyesight wasn't so good.

Claw Hammer · 08-01-2014 09:11PM

A pickaxe handle.

Sir Arthur Daley · 08-01-2014 09:43PM

Temptamperu wrote: »

Got a slap of mayonnaise at a party I passed out in.

Are you sure it was mayonnaise? :rolleyes:

harry Bailey esq · 08-01-2014 10:20PM

i spent a couple of years moonlighting as a doorman in Dublin city centre,in that time i was attacked with a claw hammer,countless bottles,i was Maced by some skanky woman who was being attacked by her even skankier boyfriend and both turned on me when i intervened but the one that stands out the most though is getting 2or 3 belts off a guy with a knuckleduster,still have the scars from that one.

The worst thing you got clobbered with

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