The Game By Neil strauss

Czarcasm wrote: »

Vitallorange I can assure you I'm not trying to flirt with you or test you by challenging your assertions about the success of PUA methodology for you. I'm merely asking that you should be able to quantify the results of the method you use.

The whole language of PUA, and this is nothing against you personally Vitallorange, but it's very "American", very cheesy, pseudoscientific. Americans do love their positivity and brotherhood and all the rest of it, so it's quite easy for ideologies and sub-cultures like PUA to gather momentum and have an audience, and a big enough target (Jerry Springer and Judge Judy participants come to mind tbh), but over here in Ireland - we really don't buy into that sort of "in touch with ourselves" philosophy so much, which is why PUA is completely alien to us, because it's more of a cultural concept than it is a psychologically provable and quantifiable method.

Saying "it works" is no proof that it actually does work. You need to prove it works, or at least present some evidence that the theory has merit, because from what I can see, all PUA does is cover over the cracks and give dull people what they think is a jedi cloak of invincibility.

There are different schools of PUA, some would match your description, but thats more and more a thing of the past.

Modern PUA tends to focus more on briniging out your genuine personality and removing any anxiety that you have.

If you had written the above in 2002 I would wholeheartedly agree with you.

Google "The attraction code" by Vin Di Carlo. You can probably download it for free.

Its a fantastic book for any guy struggling with women, or for any guy actually. You'll find it is nothing like your perception of PUA.

This is everything I know about picking up women.

1. YOUR BEST SELF

(a) HAIR

Go to a hair stylist and ask one of the guys (they are usually gay but so what?) who works there ask what hairstyle would suit you best. Once you get a hair makeover make sure that next time you go to your barber shop ask for that same cut.

(b) CLOTHES

Stop wearing tracksuits or baggy clothes or dressing in clothes that look like your mother bought them for you.
Go to a quality gents cloths shop and buy yourself a sports jacket, shirts, t-shirts, well fitting jeans or slacks and a good pair of brown and black leather shoes.
Choose clothes that fit you properly - the seams of your sleeves of your shirts and t-shirts should fit right on your shoulders while the seat of your pants should fit snug on your backside.
Get yourself an item of clothing that makes your stand out - a necklace or bracelet or a hat with a feather in it if you like - whatever looks cool and makes you stand out from other guys.

(c) POSTURE

When you stand or walk about imagine you have a hook on the top of your head attached to a rope and the rest of your body is dangling lose with all the weight in your body going right down into your feet.
Relax your shoulders and let your arms hang by your sides and stand with your legs spread and your toes pointing apart when you are in a stationary position.
When you sit do not slouch but sit up straight with your back in contact with the back of the chair.
Cross your legs when your sit or place your ankle across your knee when you are resting your legs.
Do not fidget or scratch your face or pick your nose.
Keep your hands on your lap and don't move them or pick up anything to play with it.
When you look around use your eyes and turn your head slowly.
Try to make all your movements as graceful as possible.

(d) ATTITUDE

Write down all the bad things about yourself on a sheet of paper.
Make a big long list.
Tear it up and throw it in the bin.
Next write down all the good things about yourself and tape it on the wall above your bed or wherever handy. Memorise them and repeat them over and over again in your head.
Put on some cool music and tell yourself that everytime you hum that cool music you are going to remember the list of good things you wrote down and memorised.

(e) Stop drinking too much, stop eating fast food, learn how to cook, eat more fresh fruit and vegetables and start jogging or go to the gym.
If you can’t afford to go to the gym get an exercise book and learn how to do press ups and stomach crunches in your bedroom.
Shower every day and look clean and presentable.

2. HOW TO BEGIN

1. Get your phone and ring five random numbers and ask the person who answers if Mary can come to the phone.
The person might ask you "Who the f*ck is Mary?" You apologise for calling the wrong number. Ask the person that you are going to the movies and ask what movie would they recommend. The person will either hang up or they will have a conversation with you. When you have got a good movie recommendation, say thanks and hang up.

2. Start a conversation with 10 different people on the bus, in the shopping centre, at school or college or work or anywhere you else you like.

The conversation can be about any subject you want and instead of doing most of the talking yourself concentrate on listening to what the person says and try to find out as much as you possible can about who the person is, what job they do, what they like etc etc. Get used to being friendly, being a good listener and having fun talking to all kinds of people every single day.

3. Go to a shopping centre, walk the streets, take a stroll in the park, go to church, walk into a bar or a club etc and start the same conversations with women. Do not think about getting a phone number or trying to get laid. Instead be friendly and inquisitive. After you have spoken to her for a few minutes excuse yourself and say goodbye. Get used to talking to women in normal social situations.

4. Take up hobbies like sports or do something creative like art, start reading the newspapers, watch women's shows on TV, join a book club at your local library, take up salsa classes etc etc. These are great ways to improve your mind, fill in the time and get to make friends and meet people.

3. SARGING

Sarging is making the approach which can be (a) Direct or (b) Indirect.

(a) DIRECT

This involves walking directly up to a beautiful woman and telling her directly that you are attracted to her.
This is high risk because she might reject you right away and make you feel and look like a fool if you are awkward or uncomfortable. However if you DO NOT make the approach you are 100% guaranteed that she will not get together with you.

(b) INDIRECT

An indirect approach is simply the same friendly approach you have been making to all the strangers who you have already got used to talking every day before you started talking to beautiful girls you were attracted to.
Stand at right angles to her with the toes of your shoes pointing away.
If she is seated, pull out a chair and sit down next to her immediately.
There is no pressure on you or her because it is not obvious that you are interested in her sexually.
You are just a normal guy having a normal conversation with a girl.
You don't have to think about what you are going to say.
It just comes naturally because you saw the girl and you approached within 3 secs (do not hesitate about approaching or else she will think you are a weirdo who wants something sexual right away).
Do not use a chat up line or some sort of canned material you read about on the internet as an approach (canned material you might used later on).
You can start to talk about the weather, the traffic, the latest news about your favourite celebrities or movies etc. Try being original.
It really doesn't matter what sort of conversation you start as long as you start one.

4. CREATING COMFORT

This process begins as soon as the first opening conversation you started begins to flag.
Start asking the girl about herself and keep the conversation focused on her situation.
Don't be afraid to use a little humour and mock her a little.
Example:
You: So what brings you down her to the shopping centre? Your father needs a box of nails from the hardware section but you got all distracted by all the advertisements for new shoes am I right? Daddy is going to be waiting a while isn't he?
Her: (Laughs) No I'm just hanging out with my friends, we might try on some clothes, get something to eat and then see a movie.
Now what do you do?
Simple. You have just learned she has friends, she likes clothes, she likes food and she likes movies.
These are called "hooks." And everytime a girl talks she is giving out these hooks that give you a chance to keep the conversation going.
You can now ask her about her friends - how they all met, who is her best friend, have her friends ever done something loyal or mean to her etc etc
You can get her to talk about her taste in clothes - does she likes jeans or dresses, does she like make up, who is her favourite designer, what does she like to wear when she goes out etc etc.
You can ask her about her favourite food, does she like to cook, did she every burn down the kitchen or did she ever get food poisoning etc etc
You can ask her about her favourite movies, does she like action movies or romances or comedies, does she like Brad Pitt or Matt Damon etc etc.
Basically you can start a conversation and keep it going by getting the girl to talk about herself and then shut up and listen to her.
If you are not interested at least act like you are interested.
The girl will want to talk to you and get you to listen to her, to like her and will look for your approval.
Eventually after a few minutes of her talking and you listening she will realise she doesn't even know your name or anything about you.
At that point she will ask you questions about yourself.
If you are talking to a woman do not talk about the following subjects:

Religion
Violence
Politics
Racism
Sexism

Avoid anything controversial, talk as little as possible about yourself, do not tell her anything rude or embarrasing.
Do not tell her you are a failure with women or you have no friends if that is true.
Try to make her believe she is talking to a guy who likes himself, who is having a fun time and is worth hanging out with.
Tell her what plans you have that evening, that you are meeting friends and tell her funny stories about yourself that will make her laugh but leave a lot of mystery.


5. SEDUCTION

After a girl has been talking to you for more than 10 to 20 minutes it is time to start seducing her.
As you talk to her you should touch her.
When you are talking to people (not just with women) have your arms bent at the elbow and make gestures with your hands as you talk.
That way you can hold their attention.
As you talk to people do not be afraid to touch them lightly on the arm when you both agree on something, when you both find you have shared experience or when you make them laugh etc
Maintain eye contact at all times with a girl and when you touch her lightly on the arm do not look at the position of your hand but maintain eye contact.
Because you are making gestures with your hands, she will barely notice that you touched her.
As you and the girl continue to talk escalate gradually - start off by touching her a few times on the arm, then escalate to touching her on the shoulder.
If she has a ring, ask her about it, which gives you the excuse to hold her hand and give it a gentle squeeze. If she squeezes back or seems to ignore the fact that you are still holding her hand, it means that she is attracted to you.
If she plays with her hair, scratches her neck, flushes, laughs too hard at your jokes and has a kind of dreamy look in her eyes when she looks at you and she touches you back when you touch her, then she is attracted to you.
When she crosses her legs, you should cross your legs, when she takes a sip from her cup, you take a sip from your cup.
You can stimulate arousal by using "weasel phrases" - these are hidden phrases in your speech that turn her on.

EXAMPLE 1:

You: "You know, I saw the most interesting show on the Discovery Channel last night. They were interviewing people who make their living designing attractions for amusement parks like Magic Mountain and Disneyland and Universal Studios. Wouldn't that be a cool way to make a living?"

Her: "Yeah! That sounds so interesting."

You: "Well, anyway, they were talking about the elements that make up the ideal attraction.They said there are 3 parts to the ideal attraction. First, when you EXPERIENCE the ideal attraction, you FEEL A STATE OF HIGH AROUSAL. The ideal attraction makes your heart beat faster, and your breathing gets faster and you just FEEL THAT AMAZING RUSH all over."

Her: "Yeah!"

You: "And then they said that another part to an ideal attraction is - it's fascinating. You just FEEL SO ENTHRALLED that you want to TAKE THIS RIDE (point to your d*ck!) multiple times; as soon as you GET OFF you want to GET BACK ON again."

Her: "Yeah!"

You: "And they said, finally, the most important element, is a sense of overall safety. That even though the attraction make look a little dangerous, you're CERTAIN YOU'RE SAFE... you FEEL SAFE because you realise nothing bad can really happen, so that allows you to FEEL TOTALLY FREE to LET GO AND ENJOY THAT GREAT AROUSAL again and again and again. Can you (squeeze her hand) feel _that_... is pretty close to the way it is?"

Her: "Oooh...yeah!!"

Ok, this pattern has been reported to make women cum, out of the blue, just by reciting it to them Usually though, after you're done with your description, the girl says with a sly smile "Sounded more like having sex" Don't be shocked, don't stiffen up - for she loved it regardless Or rather... exactly because of that And if nothing else comes to mind, you can answer with a confused look at first and then a "Well... now that you mention it".

You: "When you imagine how much fun it is to ride a roller coaster or any other kind of amusement park ride .. Its like as that ride is climbing up and up, you can feel your heart pounding with excitement, you feel you're breathing faster and faster, sometimes you're even gasping and panting you feel the blood rushing through every part of your body and as that excitement and tension is building and building, you reach the top of the ride and then as it crests, you just release it in a flood of excitement, and sometimes you're screaming you're so turned on.

And you know, afterwards I thought to myself, isn't that the totally accurate description of your ideal attraction to another person. You know that kind of wonderful click right there (right in the center of who you are) that just makes you feel totally drawn to this person and on one hand you feel totally safe and totally comfortable like you were meant to know them and as if you've known them forever."

EXAMPLE 2:

This pattern is best when you want to avoid the LJBF (Let's just be friends) technique that girls use all the time to blow guys out.
"I don't know if you'd find me really attractive or that I might be somebody that you can feel really close to... because it doesn't happen with just anyone... you know what I mean don't you? That feeling of closeness that allows you to let go and really be with someone... I'm not sure we could have that... But we might have fun finding out and the very least we might be friends... But it is nice isn't it? I mean when that does happen and you find yourself having all those feelings... inside. You know how that feels don't you? I mean when was the last time you felt that way? Really intense... inside... and down below… and as you think about it have you noticed you can get some of those feelings back now! But you know I find you really attractive but I don't want you to sleep with me... I'm not even going to ask you... because its your decision... and any way I'm not sure you can make me want you... but its nice to think about it isn't it? And I'm sure you'll find what you really want... eventually but until then we can have some kind of closeness… because I don't want to sleep with anyone who doesn't really want to sleep with me... 100%. But we can be friends can't we?"
This stuff sounds stupid because guys don't talk like this to other guys.
Remember however that girls talk about their feelings and emotions a whole lot more.
You see guys love porn and they get turned on by the sight of naked women.
Girls are not so much interested in good looking guys as guys who turn them on emotionally.
This is why these patterns and are extremely powerful and will get a woman wet right there and then.

6. GOING FOR THE KILL

This is the part that can screw up all the hard work you have been doing.
At some point you are going to have to get the girl's number. If you have met her in the day time she will probably be going to work or meeting friends or some other stuff so after you made a friendly interruption to her day she must be going.
You must give her a reason to see you again and that is where the situation based conversation comes in which oils the number request nicely.
If you have found out she likes movies, fashion, animals, stamp collecting etc etc you can mention that cinema where the movie is showing, the zoo where you saw the Siberian Tiger or the World Stamp Collecting Convention that you and her could both go and see.
You arrange to go out and you get her number.
Do not ask "Can I have your number?"
Instead say "You should give me your number" which her unconscious mind will interpret as a command.
Do not ask "Can I buy you a drink?"
Instead say "Buy me a drink and I'll see about buying you one if you prove to me that you are a nice girl."
Do not ask "Do you want to go see a movie?" or "Do you want to go to a fancy restaurant?"
Instead say "We should get together and see a movie" or "There's this fancy restaurant I know where we should go tonight."
By telling her what you are doing you come across as a man with a plan.
If you ask you come across as a wuss.
If you have got her number and you have arranged to go out it is time to get a kiss.
If she does not show she is ready yet you should talk some more and continue the touching I already described.
If you touch her earring rings or she lets you put your hands in her hair, you can kiss her.
What you do is:
(a) run the outside of your finger down and across her cheek to her chin while maintaining eye contact and just kiss her.
(b) When you notice she is giving you a dreamy look, tell her "You are thinking about kissing me."
This has three possible outcomes:
(1) If she says "No." Tell her "Well you looked like you were" and then move in for the kiss.
(2) If she says "Yes" just kiss her right away.
(3) If she says "Maybe" say "Let's find out" and kiss her.
If you use (b) you are almost 100% garanteed to get a kiss.

7. SEX

After you kiss a girl some girls will want to have sex with you right away.
Most will need to meet you for a date.
If you have followed each step correctly without jumping ahead it is very likely you will get a date and she will not stand you up.
If she turns up it means she is attracted to you.
Make sure the date is at night which suggests romance.
If you watch a movie or take her to dinner repeat the same techniques of conversation and touching that I already explained in the previous sections when you talk together.
On average it takes about 7 hours (divided over a few days and dates) from the first approach to having sex with a girl.
When you have left the movie theatre or restaurant or bar talk to her as you lead to her to the cab or the bus or up the street.
Do not reason with her or she will change her mind about sex.
Use euphemisms "Let's listen to some music" or "Stay just a little while for a drink or a coffee" or "You gotta see my cat doing backflips in my backyard."
When you arrive in the house, let her use the toilet while you put some music on and pour some wine.
Let her sit on the bed and keep your distance before starting the conversation again and touching her followed by some kissing.
When she lets you kiss her, become more passionate and lay her down on the bed.
Start by kissing her face and neck, then kissing her neck, then touch her boobs and run her hands over her belly and ass.
Unhook her bra underneath her top before you take off her top. As soon as you get her top off starting sucking her breasts.
Touch her between the legs from behind through her clothing before taking them off.
Stick your tongue in her belly button as you take off her panties and give her oral sex straight away.
After that it has gone beyond the point of return and she will completely surrender to sex even if she is the most obedient preacher's daughter.
If at any time she tells you to stop, simply go back one step or two and start all over again taking it gently and slowly.
That's it.
That's how it is done.

thegreatgonzo wrote: »

Exactly. This all seems to based on the mannerisms of SOME young women.

We'll have to agree to disagree, I've seen women from all backgrounds and ages do this. Its kind of like a way to "put a man in his place" or "keep him in his box" so to speak. If a man acts in a way which she believes is higher status than her when she believes he is or might be below status to her they very often test you with a cheeky comment of sorts to see of it phases you and knocks your confidence.

Of course people who like to believe social hierarchy doesn't exist will be disgusted by this. Although if they really believed it didn't exist you'd wonder why it would bother them so much.