How long between your first date and your wedding vows?

elaney · 29-11-2013 06:24PM

Myself and oh had been friends for a good few years before going out .Got together the night of 9/11 2001. Married May 2008.

Queen-Mise · 29-11-2013 06:35PM

Met Oct/Nov 1998* - Got married 4th July 2003. Still together, 10 years this year , so we renewed our vows in the inflatable church at Electric Picnic.

*Does anyone remember a movie about a band that year, it was English I think. And it was about their one last gig or a tour and the manager. It was also a comedy.

That was our first date - so if I knew what movie was, I might work out how long we are actually together.

Lisha · 29-11-2013 06:38PM

Met at 16yrs, bought house at 23. Married at 28. First child at 29, second child at 32.
Will be together 20years next June.

OneArt · 29-11-2013 06:43PM

I thought I got married once but it turned out to be indigestion.

natty_asha · 29-11-2013 06:49PM

First date was 31st Aug 2006
Began going out 11th Sept 2006
Married 4 years (Sept 2010) later to the day with a baby inbetween!
Happy Days!!

Czarcasm · 29-11-2013 06:52PM

Queen-Mise wrote: »

Met Oct/Nov 1998* - Got married 4th July 2003. Still together, 10 years this year , so we renewed our vows in the inflatable church at Electric Picnic.

*Does anyone remember a movie about a band that year, it was English I think. And it was about their one last gig or a tour and the manager. It was also a comedy.

That was our first date - so if I knew what movie was, I might work out how long we are actually together.

Still Crazy

Don't ask me how I remember this stuff, random shìte just pops into my head :pac:

tatli_lokma · 29-11-2013 07:01PM

Jeebus Irish lads seem to drag their heels and lot judging by the majority of 5+ years from dating to marriage.

For us, met June 06, married May 09. So just under 3 years, but we were engaged and living together from May 07 and would have married sooner except his dad got sick and that kinda put stuff on hold for a year.

IMO if you don't know within a year if this person is right for you, then they aren't the right person and you are just killing time. Which is grand in your 20's but not such a good idea in your 30's. But personally even in my 20's if someone wasn't the 'one' I wouldn't have a serious relationship with them - date and keep it casual yes, but be overly couple-y and go on holidays etc together? no, I wouldn't be bothered.

29-11-2013 07:02PM

tatli_lokma wrote: »

Jeebus Irish lads seem to drag their heels and lot judging by the majority of 5+ years from dating to marriage. .

Some of them may not view marriage as some kind of inevitable goal...

Penny Dreadful · 29-11-2013 07:02PM

July 2010 first date, moved in together 8 months later. Got engaged in November 2011 and married in June 2012. Just under two years from first date to wedding vows.
It's been thoroughly bloody fabulous.

Went out with a total waster for ages( 10 years) and what a waste of a decade that was. First 6 years were fine last 2-4 totally on life support. Dumped his sorry ass and was so bloody happy to.

PizzamanIRL · 29-11-2013 07:05PM

N/A

Wacker The Attacker · 29-11-2013 07:06PM

SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »

engaged 14 years:D

Were you underage when you got engaged?

Wacker The Attacker · 29-11-2013 07:07PM

OneArt wrote: »

I thought I got married once but it turned out to be indigestion.

There is a joke in there somewhere isn't there?

tatli_lokma · 29-11-2013 07:15PM

bluewolf wrote: »

Some of them may not view marriage as some kind of inevitable goal...

Which is fair enough, and lots of people don't have the inclination to get married but still know they want to make a long term commitment to someone. Others still don't want any sort of commitment at all. But those people are not going to get engaged and married anyway so it doesn't apply to them.

My comment is directed at all the people who did ultimately get married, so must have some inclination towards marriage and yet took 5+ years to decide if they wanted to marry the person they were with. I can't imagine being with someone 5 years and not knowing if they were someone I want to spend my life with or not???

LadyBetty · 29-11-2013 07:16PM

5.5 years from first date to wedding vows.

I would have happily moved things along a year prior at least, we are both mid-30s - but hubby was having too much fun being the hero of the lads, dodging the marriage bullet (they're all married). Of course, he doesn't see it like that :rolleyes:

29-11-2013 07:17PM

Maybe they did know but there wasn't a rush. Maybe they wanted to save up and have a big wedding. Maybe they were in the middle of other big things in their lives so it wasn't a priority. Seriously, you don't need to jump into it the second you decide either

Different strokes and all that

ollaetta · 29-11-2013 07:18PM

Seven years and 3 weeks. Remember thinking the day after the first date that we had f-all in common and it wouldn't last. How wrong I was!

Lucyfur · 29-11-2013 07:23PM

4 days short of 4 years.

jiminho · 29-11-2013 07:24PM

First date: 2 Dec, 2006 and Wedding date: 2 Aug, 2012 so almost 6 years.

We were 23 when we got married so in hindsight 6 years isn't too long.

Have to put it out there tho, all these people who are going out for years (5+) and then end up breaking up :eek: What a waste of time imho. I knew a couple who were were dating for 8 years (22-30) before she finally gave him the ultimatum and asked for a ring and baby soon after. He said "I don't think I'm ready" and they broke up. Pretty dickish of him but incredibly foolish on her part. Surely all couples have that talk quite quickly after they begin dating? I'm probably just naive but if you don't know within the first 2 years (1st year being the honeymoon period) then I think they should part ways. That doesn't mean he needs to get down on one knee, just that there should be frank and general consensus that they will some day get married.

I think women are to blame more so then men (sorry). Let's be honest, most of us aren't exactly forward thinkers

tatli_lokma · 29-11-2013 07:24PM

bluewolf wrote: »

Maybe they did know but there wasn't a rush. Maybe they wanted to save up and have a big wedding. Maybe they were in the middle of other big things in their lives so it wasn't a priority. Seriously, you don't need to jump into it the second you decide either
Different strokes and all that

Never said you had to rush, but neither do you need to drag your heels. We had things crop up which took priority so instead of being engaged for a year we ended up engaged for two. So its not like I am condemning people for taking their time. But in my experience Irish couples generally (and I appreciate I am generalising here) take a lot longer than other nationalities in my experience. If my husband was Irish we probably wouldn't even be engaged yet! :eek:

But anyway this is all getting a bit too in depth. It was only a throwaway tongue in cheek comment based upon the average times given in this thread (and also somewhat based upon my own observations of mates and their temeline from meeting to engaged to married - not one Irish/Irish couple I know progressed through that temeline in less than 5 years).

29-11-2013 07:27PM

A fella I work with first met his wife 2 months (!!!!) before he married her. 2 months!

They are happily married 4 years later, and both lovely people.

BUT 2 MONTHS

tatli_lokma · 29-11-2013 07:33PM

Golovkin wrote:

In my case we got married ten years after meeting. I had no intention of getting married bit she really wanted to so we got married

But did you know you wanted to be with her long term? It hardly took you 10 years to decide she was the one and only for you? Sometimes couples compromise because one half wants the marriage cert. For the other partner its a case of 'well I'm going to spend the rest of my life with her/him anyway. If it means that much to them I can do that'. But even though you didn't initiate the marriage doesn't mean you weren't already planning on spending your life with them regardless??

FreshKnickers · 29-11-2013 07:37PM

Almost 12 years. Engaged after just under 5 years.

snickerpuss · 29-11-2013 07:42PM

Started going out Nov 09, engaged Aug 13, will be married April 15. So we'll be 5.5 years on wedding day. I'll only be 28 getting married so that suits me lovely!

murphydublin · 29-11-2013 07:50PM

Met July 2000 married Oct 2013 with our 11, 10 And 4 year old children by our sides

jester77 · 29-11-2013 07:52PM

Sometime in 2003 we started dating, 10+ years later and still dating.

The_Chap · 29-11-2013 07:54PM

Met March 2010, engaged Sep 2010, married March 2012, daughter born June 2013 :-)

Gongoozler · 29-11-2013 08:03PM

jiminho wrote: »

Have to put it out there tho, all these people who are going out for years (5+) and then end up breaking up :eek: What a waste of time imho. I knew a couple who were were dating for 8 years (22-30) before she finally gave him the ultimatum and asked for a ring and baby soon after. He said "I don't think I'm ready" and they broke up. Pretty dickish of him but incredibly foolish on her part. Surely all couples have that talk quite quickly after they begin dating? I'm probably just naive but if you don't know within the first 2 years (1st year being the honeymoon period) then I think they should part ways. That doesn't mean he needs to get down on one knee, just that there should be frank and general consensus that they will some day get married.

I think women are to blame more so then men (sorry). Let's be honest, most of us aren't exactly forward thinkers

What the **** are you on about? Having a let's get married and have babies talk when you've just started dating? That's not women, that's a crazy person.

And it's a waste of time being in a relationship unless you're planning on getting married? You know, getting married at 23 seems pretty odd to me.

Czarcasm · 29-11-2013 08:12PM

tatli_lokma wrote: »

Never said you had to rush, but neither do you need to drag your heels. We had things crop up which took priority so instead of being engaged for a year we ended up engaged for two. So its not like I am condemning people for taking their time. But in my experience Irish couples generally (and I appreciate I am generalising here) take a lot longer than other nationalities in my experience. If my husband was Irish we probably wouldn't even be engaged yet! :eek:

But anyway this is all getting a bit too in depth. It was only a throwaway tongue in cheek comment based upon the average times given in this thread (and also somewhat based upon my own observations of mates and their temeline from meeting to engaged to married - not one Irish/Irish couple I know progressed through that temeline in less than 5 years).

Marry in haste, repent at leisure

Ginny · 29-11-2013 08:12PM

Just under 3 years, married just over 2 years with a 16 month old.

April O Neill II · 29-11-2013 08:16PM

drunkmonkey wrote: »

You mightn't have but she already knows what her dress is like and what color flowers are on the wedding tables.

Er no, not necessarily. I'm in a relationship where marriage has never come up, and I never think about that stuff. Then again, I don't really get the whole wedding palaver.

How long between your first date and your wedding vows?

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