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Time to change my life around for the better minus drink.
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Carpet diem wrote: »Not since last slip I mentioned on here.
I don't think I'm doing great really. Really need to plan my day more and even plan ahead to achieve certain landmarks.
Sorry just in wicked form today tbh
That's why we don't encourage too much thinking in your first year, lol, we are better judges of how great you are doing at this stage, trust me.
And you are doing great, despite how you feel.
I remember an old AA pal told me : "the same mind that kept you drinking is the same mind you have now. In other words, your mind lies to you and wants you drinking again, which means it wants you dead".
Heard other variations on this over the years, like, "My mind is like a bad neighborhood, it's not safe to go in there alone"
What have you been doing?
Going to meetings still, if so how often?
How did the meet up with your potential sponsor go? (and yes, I am nosy, lol)0 -
Amazingfun wrote: »That's why we don't encourage too much thinking in your first year, lol, we are better judges of how great you are doing at this stage, trust me.
And you are doing great, despite how you feel.
I remember an old AA pal told me : "the same mind that kept you drinking is the same mind you have now. In other words, your mind lies to you and wants you drinking again, which means it wants you dead".
Heard other variations on this over the years, like, "My mind is like a bad neighborhood, it's not safe to go in there alone"
What have you been doing?
Going to meetings still, if so how often?
How did the meet up with your potential sponsor go? (and yes, I am nosy, lol)
Noisy house mate coming in at 3 in the morning has me awake. :-(
Ya I went to three this week. I literally can't go to anymore due to work and part time college.
I gave him number but he didn't ring me so kinda mad with that but he took it down on piece of paper so reckon he lost it. Hopefully try get number of some one for him and give him a buzz0 -
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I think I need to lay off the booze. Been pretty much drinking every night for a few months. Before, a bottle of wine was enough. Now, its two if they are there or plough into the OH's beer when I'm finished. Getting up is agony. I'm on autopilot until about 1pm. I have zero concentration and comprehension skills - to the point that I found myself wondering if I had had a mini stroke at some point
No money for the important things in life - "ah sure this Lidl shiraz is only 6 euro!" - but doesnt it add up?
Something of a turning point last night when I was on the way home from college and my friend asked me what had been covered in he first lecture, as he had missed it. I couldnt tell him! It was less than two hours since we'd finished it and my mind was just blank!
I just hope I haven't done irreparable damage to my cognitive and memory skills. On the dry last night and bounced out of bed this morning. Practically cartwheeled into work - I didn't realise how sh1t I'd been feeling!0 -
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OldNotWIse wrote: »I think I need to lay off the booze. Been pretty much drinking every night for a few months. Before, a bottle of wine was enough. Now, its two if they are there or plough into the OH's beer when I'm finished. Getting up is agony. I'm on autopilot until about 1pm. I have zero concentration and comprehension skills - to the point that I found myself wondering if I had had a mini stroke at some point No money for the important things in life - "ah sure this Lidl shiraz is only 6 euro!" - but doesnt it add up?
Something of a turning point last night when I was on the way home from college and my friend asked me what had been covered in he first lecture, as he had missed it. I couldnt tell him! It was less than two hours since we'd finished it and my mind was just blank!
I just hope I haven't done irreparable damage to my cognitive and memory skills. On the dry last night and bounced out of bed this morning. Practically cartwheeled into work - I didn't realise how sh1t I'd been feeling!
Memory improves in time but it takes a while. Why not give a break for a while and see how you get on? If you can't take a break on it then maybe you have to look at it more seriously.0 -
Deleted User wrote: »Memory improves in time but it takes a while. Why not give a break for a while and see how you get on? If you can't take a break on it then maybe you have to look at it more seriously.
Are you sure about that. I thought once the ould brain cells were killed that was that. ?
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Fingers Mcginty wrote: »Are you sure about that. I thought once the ould brain cells were killed that was that. ?
My short term memory was awful and has definitely improved since giving up.0 -
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It is reversible according to this and many other articles I've read on the subject:
''Is [cognitive] Impairment Reversible?
Certain alcohol-related cognitive impairment is reversible with abstinence (17). Newly detoxified adult alcoholics often exhibit mild yet significant deficits in some cognitive abilities, especially problem-solving, short-term memory, and visuospatial abilities (18). By remaining abstinent, however, the recovering alcoholic will continue to recover brain function over a period of several months to 1 year (19)—with improvements in working memory, visuospatial functioning, and attention—accompanied by significant increases in brain volume, compared with treated alcoholics who have subsequently relapsed to drinking (18).''
Full article here. Warning - it's not for the faint hearted.
http://alcoholism.about.com/cs/alerts/l/blnaa53.htm[/QUOTE]
Several months to one year? :mad: Sh1t. Thought I was good not drinking since Sunday Miss it, but certainly feel so much better. Not half as blue as I usually am, and waking naturally before my alarm, time for breakfast and dog walk! Can actually concentrate in work and at lectures!0 -
Fingers Mcginty wrote: »Are you sure about that. I thought once the ould brain cells were killed that was that. ?
Yes, once thought to be the case. May still be true for some areas of the brain, memory holes may never get filled but we do regenerate at least some brain cells.0 -
OldNotWIse wrote: »Several months to one year? :mad: Sh1t. Thought I was good not drinking since Sunday Miss it, but certainly feel so much better. Not half as blue as I usually am, and waking naturally before my alarm, time for breakfast and dog walk! Can actually concentrate in work and at lectures!
One of the least understood relationships with Alcohol is it's hangover period. A hangover period can last more than 24hrs, it can stretch to several days and even a week.
A drink induced sleep is akin to a coma and no productive sleep is achieved thus a drunk person sleeping over night may awake with effectively no sleep at all.
One good night's natural sleep might shake off a lot of post alcohol symptoms and a feeling of well-being will usually result as you are reporting.
Alcohol damage is cumulative, smoking damage is usually permanent, both are laid down over a number of years and they take many years to recover from. A pre middle aged [35] person can expect to make a full recovery, post middle age the damage may be manageable and the recovery longer.0 -
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There are men's meetings if you feel that strongly about the issue.
And as this thread (and others) confirm, AA is not the only way. However, for those who are in AA, beginning to make excuses for not getting to meetings is often a common theme amongst those who later wonder 'what the hell happened' when they end up back out again.
Just my experience. And often it's when we are 'doing great' again, (back to luxurious thoughts about 'abs' perhaps, lol) in life in general, that the desperation that drove us to go there in the first place begins to evaporate. The holiday season is beginning soon, pressure to attend parties and other events with drink will be mounting, might be a good idea to stay closer to meetings and sober folk as opposed to not.
It's funny you mention Toastmasters. I've often said that meetings were better than Toastmasters for public speaking training, haha.
Still, good luck with whatever road you choose, but watch that ole head of yours, remember it was your thinking plus your drinking that got you to the doors of AA in the first place 0 -
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Carpet diem wrote: »Have to say since I started posting here my life has changed for the better.
I'm more aware of what I want in life. Not always plain sailing but better.
One thing I noticed during week is if you are surrounded by good people it makes such a difference. Or put it another way people that had same outlook as you. Something to work on.
Becoming less caring of what others think to a certain extent and tried stopped bitching about people for the way they do stuff. None of my business. Just need to put the head down.
I haven't gone to meeting in a while - maybe I should but I don't feel it. I know people will give out to me on here but that life.
Sorted myself out with loads of vitamins today. Expensive business but worth it I think.
See, here's what is funny, and what I (and perhaps others) can see, but you can't.
You asked for help here, you went to AA, you wanted to start getting into the program, getting a sponsor, etc, etc. But that was when you were still feeling down/bad, and that 'gift of desperation' was still active, the pain still fresh.
Now, after a few weeks of sobriety, you are feeling better, and it seems now you think going to meetings was too drastic a move perhaps, lol?
Not an uncommon sequence of events with newcomers, one I've witnessed manys a time.
What I am saying is this: don't delude yourself into thinking myself or anyone here will be 'scolding' you, like a child, for not going to meetings. AA is for people that want it; it's a choice. I am grateful I choose to stick with it, as it has worked for me for 12 years and counting. But (as I've said loads) it is far from the only game in town.
I wish you well with your choices 0 -
Amazingfun wrote: »See, here's what is funny, and what I (and perhaps others) can see, but you can't.
You asked for help here, you went to AA, you wanted to start getting into the program, getting a sponsor, etc, etc. But that was when you were still feeling down/bad, and that 'gift of desperation' was still active, the pain still fresh.
Now, after a few weeks of sobriety, you are feeling better, and it seems now you think going to meetings was too drastic a move perhaps, lol?
Not an uncommon sequence of events with newcomers, one I've witnessed manys a time.
What I am saying is this: don't delude yourself into thinking myself or anyone here will be 'scolding' you, like a child, for not going to meetings. AA is for people that want it; it's a choice. I am grateful I choose to stick with it, as it has worked for me for 12 years and counting. But (as I've said loads) it is far from the only game in town.
I wish you well with your choices
I know - I'll go on Saturday morning to the steps. They are the ones I get most out of.0 -
Amazingfun wrote: »See, here's what is funny, and what I (and perhaps others) can see, but you can't.
You asked for help here, you went to AA, you wanted to start getting into the program, getting a sponsor, etc, etc. But that was when you were still feeling down/bad, and that 'gift of desperation' was still active, the pain still fresh.
Now, after a few weeks of sobriety, you are feeling better, and it seems now you think going to meetings was too drastic a move perhaps, lol?
Not an uncommon sequence of events with newcomers, one I've witnessed manys a time.
What I am saying is this: don't delude yourself into thinking myself or anyone here will be 'scolding' you, like a child, for not going to meetings. AA is for people that want it; it's a choice. I am grateful I choose to stick with it, as it has worked for me for 12 years and counting. But (as I've said loads) it is far from the only game in town.
I wish you well with your choices
What are the other alternatives to AA that your referring to?0 -
Carpet diem wrote: »What are the other alternatives to AA that your referring to?
Lifering, Aware, Rational recovery, church based recovery groups, etc, etc....loads of options about these days.
I can only speak for AA as being something that works, due to my own experience, but certainly no one is trapped in it, for as they say "the door swings both ways" 0 -
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Carpet diem wrote: »My two words for today and weekend ahead - triggers and prayer.
Prayer is a good tool I've found, often saves me from myself and my negative "committee" of voices that reside in my head:P
Triggers? Some of my former drinking "triggers" included breathing, days that end in "Y", lol. I didn't fully cop to this until a guy I heard speak asked the people in the room to raise our hands if we related to the following:
Him: Do you drink when you're sad? (hands raised).
Do you drink when you're happy? (hands raised).
Do you drink when you have a good relationship? (hands raised)
Do you drink when you're all alone/single? (hands raised)
Do you drink when you have money? (hands raised)
Do you drink when you're broke? (hands raised)!
Suddenly it dawned on me that I drank no matter what the external situation was. It was what they call a "aha moment".
You are done with drink, as am I, as are many of us who want permanent sobriety. This is why we talk of "we" in the "we admitted we were powerless over alcohol", no one fares well on their own. Stick with the pack, safety in numbers
There is no "trigger", real or imagined, that can cause any alkie to start drinking again. That includes murders, former abuse, relationship troubles, job loss and even moments as seemingly trivial as losing a wallet (yes I've heard it!).
There are however many who attempt to use certain events/happenings like these to justify their slips. None of these ever really make any sense in light of what drinking again produces in their lives, and the disappointment and stress back into the lives of those they profess to love.
Beware the mind that wants desperately to provide a "reason" for a return to drink. Try to stay "in the day", and talk to others if you need to.
Ps: Good luck this weekend with whatever event is causing this worry?
Remember: this too shall pass.0 -
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