I gave the missus a dig last night.

ROCKMAN · 06-09-2013 10:47AM

Sitting in bed one night, when I got cramp in my leg , the type that makes you instantly straighten your leg ,all well and good except my 4 year old was at the end of the bed watching TV , Didn't think a 4 year old could fly that far :eek::eek::o

Liamario · 06-09-2013 11:04AM

I was walking down the street one day and my nose started itching me. I gave it a scratch and I accidentally stabbed an old lady 50 times. Oh how we lol'd.

Handy11 · 06-09-2013 11:15AM

ghogie91 wrote: »

in bed most nights eyes wide open and has a full blown conversation with me and then falls back asleep, she doesnt ever remember talking even though i have started asking her are you fully awake and i get a yes back, the last conversation was about baby potatos weird

Mine's similar. Once sat up and said "Who....wh...oh it's ok never mind".
When I pressed her on it she replied "I was going to ask who's feet are they but it's ok, they're my own".

King George VI · 06-09-2013 12:57PM

My GF tells me I talk in my sleep the odd time. Apparently sometimes I'll respond to any noise. Two weeks ago I was fast asleep and she let out a big fart, to which I replied "What the **** did you say?!? Don't call me that ever again!"

What she doesn't know is that she also talks in her sleep and, although all she says is gibberish, it gives me great entertainment. One night the conversation goes:

Her: do you know where the deoderant is?
Me: what?
Her: heemmmphhh. I have to fix. Nails. Where is it?
Me: what?
Her: I bet you didn't know it was behind your ear the whole time did ye, ye little bollix... hahaha. Ta-daaaa
Me: shush
Her: you don't know!!

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 06-09-2013 01:06PM

I've got to be the most annoying person to sleep with. I'm in and out of the bed like a yoyo during the night, when I'm drunk and someone's unfortunate enough to be next to me, I tend to talk so much that I'm delirious, (candy crush and that evil devil baby from some movie I watched) in the middle of an otherwise normal conversation. When I'm really sound asleep, I apparently lay on my side with my arm stretched directly up, and it's fallen on more than one occasion, either battering my face or whoever is beside me.

Once me and my ex moved my bed from the middle of the room to over by the wall, I woke up the next morning with a bloody bed, and a thumping headache. I must have headbutted the wall some part of the night, and didn't even wake up.

DeadlyH83 · 06-09-2013 01:23PM

My dad woke me for work which was the Friday morning of a friends weekend long free gaff party..

Dad: Get up for work..
Me: Im going to Fitzy gaff....
Dad:What are you on about?
Me: I'm going getting cans for Fitzy house (before waking up and realising I was taking rubbish)

Manzoor14 wrote: »

Woke my girlfriend early one morning by asking "So do you have many games in Europe this year?"

Her: Eh?
Me: Yeah sure you're in the Europa league next season yeah?
Her: What are you talking about?
Me: Sorry, I thought you were a Spurs fan?

I rolled over and went back to sleep!

The_Valeyard · 07-09-2013 10:20AM

Mr Benevolent wrote: »

But is your other half The Doctor or The Master? That would determine the level of retribution.

Indeed. Suppose it depends what mood im in :P

I gave the missus a dig last night.

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