Why do the Irish make such a big deal out of approaching members of the opposite sex?

Femme_Fatale · 22-06-2013 05:32PM

Oh but as I said, it's not even the rudeness that's the issue; it's the fact that she has the audacity to not fancy him at all, even if she isn't rude about expressing same. That is what a few (not many) vocal guys keep saying on these type threads and their attitudes are horrific.

If you don't fancy someone, whether you're male or female, what are you supposed to do? Pretend you do fancy them or something?

If the girl is rude to a well-meaning guy though, she's a ****ing weapon, no question about it.

Boofle · 22-06-2013 05:40PM

lufties wrote: »

this is what is called the male ego, some of us lads can take rejection with a pinch of salt and it doesnt hurt our feelings/make us bitter..i think living in ireland, in some cases,a lad only gets a window of a few hours on a saturday night to interchange with the opposite sex..after that its back to a week's work(if he is lucky to have a job) in a male dominated workplace. normally lads these days make a good effort to look good for a night out, and when rude women shoot them down so easily it can really induce bitterness/anger.

And why do you reckon so many women act like this (if indeed they really do?) . . . .They are sick to the teeth of how a lot of men approach them and speak to them and the reaction if they politely tell him they're not interested etc.

Here's one example - myself and my friends were in a nightclub a few weeks ago and as we were walking to the bathroom we passed a group of guys. One of them beckoned one of my friends over. As she got closer to him he suddenly put out his hand and looked her up and down and then says (to the guffaws of laughter from his numbskull friends behind him) "Actually no. Ugh." screwed up his entire face. The poor girl was mortified. So now do you have any understanding how that particular girl (or many others) may not smile and chat to the next man that approaches her on a night out?

This is only one of many many examples I could trot out here. Pathetic.

Boofle · 22-06-2013 05:41PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

Oh but as I said, it's not even the rudeness that's the issue; it's the fact that she has the audacity to not fancy him at all, even if she isn't rude about expressing same. That is what a few (not many) vocal guys keep saying on these type threads and their attitudes are horrific.

If you don't fancy someone, whether you're male or female, what are you supposed to do? Pretend you do fancy them or something?

If the girl is rude to a well-meaning guy though, she's a ****ing weapon, no question about it.

+ 1 million.

Legs.Eleven · 22-06-2013 05:45PM

I probably was out of order with my "you can't get a ride" comment, in fairness (childish comment, I'll admit) but I've been on this thing since 2007 (under a different profile name) and the CONSTANT animosity towards Irish women in AH gets on my tits to the extreme. Nothing can be discussed on here without people like weathering coming on and making it uncomfortable for female Boards posters. My comment was unreasonable but tbh, I'm fed up with this guff. This is not an all-male forum and Irish females post on here too, so we deserve respect. You (weathering) and posters of your ilk make it extremely unpleasant for Irish women like myself to contribute.

Czarcasm · 22-06-2013 05:48PM

Singularity 1 wrote: »

Look, there's plenty of people that agree with me and plenty that don't, so how about we just leave it there? As I said, our experiences are anecdotal.

I wouldn't call a handful of posters agreeing with either of us "plenty" tbh. I'd rather everyone was able to have a civil discussion as I agree with Kyuss Bishop and Femme Fatale that it could be a great discussion, but really it's not one you can have on Boards because some of the comments here by fly-by posters if they said anything like it in public you could at least tell them to fcuk off with their pig-headed and juvenile trolling.

You didn't come across as impartial in your OP and from then on you should've known the shìt it would stir up. I don't think you'd even get the sort of validation of your opinion you were looking for in The Gentleman's Club tbh, because as hard as you try to be reasonable, it doesn't be long before the bitterness and frustration seeps out when people disagree with your opinion.

lufties wrote: »

this is what is called the male ego, some of us lads can take rejection with a pinch of salt and it doesnt hurt our feelings/make us bitter..i think living in ireland, in some cases,a lad only gets a window of a few hours on a saturday night to interchange with the opposite sex..after that its back to a week's work(if he is lucky to have a job) in a male dominated workplace. normally lads these days make a good effort to look good for a night out, and when rude women shoot them down so easily it can really induce bitterness/anger.

This. Very much this, great post btw, and the same could easily apply to women when they spend hours getting dolled up and the rude men that shoot them down so easily it can really induce the same bitterness/anger.

lufties · 22-06-2013 05:55PM

Boofle wrote: »

And why do you reckon so many women act like this (if indeed they really do?) . . . .They are sick to the teeth of how a lot of men approach them and speak to them and the reaction if they politely tell him they're not interested etc.

Here's one example - myself and my friends were in a nightclub a few weeks ago and as we were walking to the bathroom we passed a group of guys. One of them beckoned one of my friends over. As she got closer to him he suddenly put out his hand and looked her up and down and then says (to the guffaws of laughter from his numbskull friends behind him) "Actually no. Ugh." screwed up his entire face. The poor girl was mortified. So now do you have any understanding how that particular girl (or many others) may not smile and chat to the next man that approaches her on a night out?

This is only one of many many examples I could trot out here. Pathetic.

that is indeed a horrible thing to do to someone. I have encountered similar scenerios though too where well meaning guys have been shot down by hyena like women laughing their holes off at advances made towards them, this happens more often than you think..can we not all get along eh

eireannBEAR · 22-06-2013 05:57PM

seanafitz destroyed this thread her posts were disrespectful maybe next time you people want a serious discussion you should ''all'' jump on the first troll that pops up.

but as for young men rating women thats just a fact of life and will or never should be offensive.
women are guilty of the same things.

Czarcasm · 22-06-2013 06:01PM

lufties wrote: »

that is indeed a horrible thing to do to someone. I have encountered similar scenerios though too where well meaning guys have been shot down by hyena like women laughing their holes off at advances made towards them, this happens more often than you think..can we not all get along eh

I kid, I kid!

Femme_Fatale · 22-06-2013 06:02PM

eireannBEAR wrote: »

seanafitz destroyed this thread her posts were disrespectful

She wrote some dreadful muck but she wasn't the only one, to be fair.

but as for young men rating women thats just a fact of life and will or never should be offensive.
women are guilty of the same things.

Not the women I know. And I doubt most intelligent men would engage in such asinine, inane drivel as "marking" women out of 10.
Even if it's "a fact of life" among some... people, doesn't mean those who are more intelligent can't also express a view on it.

Singularity 1 · 22-06-2013 06:03PM

Czarcasm wrote: »

I wouldn't call a handful of posters agreeing with either of us "plenty" tbh. I'd rather everyone was able to have a civil discussion as I agree with Kyuss Bishop and Femme Fatale that it could be a great discussion, but really it's not one you can have on Boards because some of the comments here by fly-by posters if they said anything like it in public you could at least tell them to fcuk off with their pig-headed and juvenile trolling.

You didn't come across as impartial in your OP and from then on you should've known the shìt it would stir up. I don't think you'd even get the sort of validation of your opinion you were looking for in The Gentleman's Club tbh, because as hard as you try to be reasonable, it doesn't be long before the bitterness and frustration seeps out when people disagree with your opinion..

Ok then, there some posters who agree and disagree with me. But you're right, it could be a great dicussion but I was kind of expecting it to pan out this way. Thing is though, I can't create a thread like this without annoying someone. If you created a thread saying how the Irish are great at approaching members of the opposite sex, you'd get people disagreeing with you too. That's the way it goes. You can't please everyone.

Btw, I'm not bitter here, I just thought it was an interesting topic. I'm not going to refrain from expressing my opinions just to avoid the wrath of the PC brigade. Do you ever create your own threads in AH or do you just comment on others? Because its not easy to start a thread like this and stay PC. It just can't be done.

Boofle · 22-06-2013 06:04PM

lufties wrote: »

that is indeed a horrible thing to do to someone. I have encountered similar scenerios though too where well meaning guys have been shot down by hyena like women laughing their holes off at advances made towards them, this happens more often than you think..can we not all get along eh

Oh I have no doubt it must be soul destroying for a man to have approached someone and for her to laugh at him or make little of him - totally agree.

When I lived in the UK if I told a guy I wasn't interested or whatever they usually just went on their way. They didn't respond with "you're frigid" etc which seems to be a favourite retort of some Irish menI have encountered. I think a lot of Irish people lack confidence compared to other nations.

lufties · 22-06-2013 06:06PM

Czarcasm wrote: »

I kid, I kid!

I enjoyed your model/chubby bird story though lol, cant beat that feeling when a hot girl is into you..doesnt happen me very often mind you, but it does every now and then, when all the planets are aligned etc etc...:)

eireannBEAR · 22-06-2013 06:06PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

She wrote some dreadful muck but she wasn't the only one, to be fair.

Not the women I know. And I doubt most intelligent men would engage in such asinine, inane drivel as "marking" women out of 10.
Even if it's "a fact of life" among some... people, doesn't mean those who are more intelligent can't also express a view on it.

she started it.

and no even 19 year old geniuses rate women on looks...so cop on surely you already know this.

starlit · 22-06-2013 06:07PM

To be honest it was when i was in playschool and college and since then have i mixed with the other gender to me. I never really had much of a chance when in primary and secondary school they were same gender schools. Where i lived made it harder for me and i rarely went out as a teenager not until college.

Femme_Fatale · 22-06-2013 06:09PM

No I don't believe for a second all lads rate women out of 10 - it's something I associate with guys who think women are solely a cock receptacle, and those PUA guru psychos.
Of course men comment on how attractive a woman is and there's nothing wrong with that (I do hate men or women commenting on a person being "ugly" though - makes me uncomfortable; we get it: you don't think they're a looker, go you, you stunning specimen) but rating her out of 10? I really doubt that shyte is commonplace. Men deserve more credit than for most of their gender to have an expectation of such dumbness attached to them.

Czarcasm · 22-06-2013 06:15PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

Not the women I know. And I doubt most intelligent men would engage in such asinine, inane drivel.

Even if it's "a fact of life", doesn't mean people can't also express a view on it.

While I completely agree that it's asinine, inane drivel, it is indeed something that happens, even amongst people you'd expect to be more mature (that's why I like some people - as much as they annoy me, they never cease to surprise me!

).

In fact, yep, I was right, they did indeed make a tv show based on the concept. It's channel 4 though, so that DOESN'T surprise me - the TV home of asinine, inane drivel:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCYpmRtTe8I

And who hasn't of course heard of BeautifulPeople.com

Singularity 1 · 22-06-2013 06:15PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

No I don't believe for a second all lads rate women out of 10 - it's something I associate with guys who think women are solely a cock receptacle, and those PUA guru psychos.
Of course men comment on how attractive a woman is and there's nothing wrong with that (I do hate men or women commenting on a person being "ugly" though - makes me uncomfortable; we get it: you don't think they're a looker, go you, you stunning specimen) but rating her out of 10? I really doubt that shyte is commonplace. Men deserve more credit than for most of their gender to have an expectation of such dumbness attached to them.

Marks out of 2, I'd give her 1 ha. No I might use the rating thing the odd time but only as a laugh. Some people rate anothers ability in bed on a similar scale though. There's actually a page on facebook called Dublin rides, where people rate others they have slept with, and they even give their names.

Jericho. · 22-06-2013 06:16PM

Rating out of 10? Nah. It's more of a yay or nay system but then I can only speak for myself not all guys. It would be lovely to pretend appearance doesn't matter at all but there has to be at least some attraction. Surely everyone can agree on that? What has already been said about treating women like people and not objects of desire is important too. Just talk to them, normally.

eireannBEAR · 22-06-2013 06:18PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

No I don't believe for a second all lads rate women out of 10 - it's something I associate with guys who think women are solely a cock receptacle, and those PUA guru psychos.
Of course men comment on how attractive a woman is and there's nothing wrong with that (I do hate men or women commenting on a person being "ugly" though - makes me uncomfortable; we get it: you don't think they're a looker, go you, you stunning specimen) but rating her out of 10? I really doubt that shyte is commonplace. Men deserve more credit than for most of their gender to have an expectation of such dumbness attached to them.

so you dont have a problem with guys expressing to each other if they think a womans attractive,but you do have a problem with them rating a woman out of ten? are you just against numbers or what is your problem here? if rooney plays a bad game for utd, is it wrong for the match report to rate him a 6?? should they just say ''he tried his best'' instead? lol

Table Top Joe · 22-06-2013 06:19PM

Czarcasm wrote: »

While I completely agree that it's asinine, inane drivel, it is indeed something that happens, even amongst people you'd expect to be more mature

I have a buddy whos a Dr and even he does it, in fairness its usually done in a jokey way(by all the guys I know who do it not just him)

and also the women I know who do it, I live with two girls and have a lot of female friends, ive heard a lot of them discuss men just as crudely as any man would a woman, people seriously need to lighten up

Table Top Joe · 22-06-2013 06:22PM

eireannBEAR wrote: »

are you just against numbers or what is your problem here? if rooney plays a bad game for utd, is it wrong for the match report to rate him a 6?? should they just say ''he tried his best'' instead? lol

Ha ha ha

Femme_Fatale · 22-06-2013 06:22PM

Oh it's grand if it's done in a joking way, but it ain't here on After Hours.

eireannBEAR wrote: »

so you dont have a problem with guys expressing to each other if they think a womans attractive,but you do have a problem with them rating a woman out of ten?

Because a human being is not a ****ing number or a footballer's performance. There's obviously a huge difference between seeing someone you think is gorgeous and saying it to your friend, versus making a point of commenting on the appearance of every person of the opposite sex you see, and worse again using a numerical scale to do so.

If you feel you really have to, in order to look like "da maaan", fine - but maybe just do so among your likeminded peers whom you feel pressurised into fitting in with, rather than subjecting people on a discussion forum to it, when many of them don't appreciate that kind of drivel.

Legs.Eleven · 22-06-2013 06:25PM

A woman is a human not a football game. What a ridiculous comparison.

lufties · 22-06-2013 06:26PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

No I don't believe for a second all lads rate women out of 10 - it's something I associate with guys who think women are solely a cock receptacle, and those PUA guru psychos.
Of course men comment on how attractive a woman is and there's nothing wrong with that (I do hate men or women commenting on a person being "ugly" though - makes me uncomfortable; we get it: you don't think they're a looker, go you, you stunning specimen) but rating her out of 10? I really doubt that shyte is commonplace. Men deserve more credit than for most of their gender to have an expectation of such dumbness attached to them.

calling someone ugly is sad, and says a lot about that person, funnily enough any lads i know who hate on women, either dont have one or isnt happy with the one he has. anyway getting back to the thread topic, personally I use online dating because after over a decade of bar hopping, searching for scarlet johansson, I learned that its simply a waste of time, even here in Asia with all the opportunities it can bring

. I reckon the guys that do well in pubs are the quick witted ones, hence there is a social anxiety for the rest of us who can't turn into a comedian on call ,and we have to rely on the 'good guy approach'.

eireannBEAR · 22-06-2013 06:27PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

Because a human being is not a ****ing number or a footballer's performance. There's obviously a huge difference between seeing someone you think is gorgeous and saying it to your friend, versus making a point of commenting on the appearance of every person of the opposite sex you see, and worse again using a numerical scale to do so.

mind your own business my friends i rated girls when we were younger and thats our business,if i see you and rate you a 4 thats my business not yours,get over yourself. if you get hurt or offended this easy im glad i dont have to deal with you in real ife,and god help any man or woman that those.

Weathering · 22-06-2013 06:27PM

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

She was out of order saying you can't get a ride, but her annoyance is understandable considering the post you wrote which provoked that response from her. The post you wrote IS the kind of post that guys who can't pull and hate women because of it, would write.
It's miserable seeing the hostility towards women in some posts here - and kinda worrying tbh. On this thread, the one about promiscuous women ("I'm a man and ride all around me but I think women - even though I ride loads of them - who do it are disgusting" is the general gist of that one), the one about people you disrespect... you can't blame women for getting defensive if you take a few seconds to put yourself in their shoes.
And as for "Men get it just as bad" etc. NOT on After Hours though; not even close.

You can also see i backed tracked from my initial post as I didn't mean to sayy every women but there defo has been a percentage increase in my opinion. Yet u have proceeded to indicate i cant get a ride again and all you're blinded bias Liked it.

So in other words all of you who like that post think that if i were to talk to u id only want to sleep with you? What kind of a fcked up mind set is that? I have a gf so i have no worries when it comes to "getting the ride" there is more to life than sex yet as all you gals have proven u seem to think if i speak to u i want sex.

Singularity 1 · 22-06-2013 06:30PM

lufties wrote: »

calling someone ugly is sad, and says a lot about that person, funnily enough any lads i know who hate on women, either dont have one or isnt happy with the one he has. anyway getting back to the thread topic, personally I use online dating because after over a decade of bar hopping, searching for scarlet johansson, I learned that its simply a waste of time, even here in Asia with all the opportunities it can bring . I reckon the guys that do well in pubs are the quick witted ones, hence there is a social anxiety for the rest of us who can't turn into a comedian on call ,and we have to rely on the 'good guy approach'.

Scarlet doesn't leave my house, that's why you never found her

eireannBEAR · 22-06-2013 06:30PM

Weathering wrote: »

You can also see i backed tracked from my initial post as I didn't mean to sayy every women but there defo has been a percentage increase in my opinion. Yet u have proceeded to indicate i cant get a ride again and all you're blinded bias Liked it.

So in other words all of you who like that post think that if i were to talk to u id only want to sleep with you? What kind of a fcked up mind set is that? I have a gf so i have no worries when it comes to "getting the ride" there is more to life than sex yet as all you gals have proven u seem to think if i speak to u i want sex.

yes yet you were made out to be the big bad guy,when originally they actually attacked you,lol.

Legs.Eleven · 22-06-2013 06:33PM

Weathering wrote: »

Irish girls are getting more stuck up by the day. Pulling faces and prancing around with a sense of high importance-you're in a fcking dingy club get over yourself. Any contact and they assume you're trying to pull them on a night out-it gets really annoying when you're just being friendly

First post by Weathering. Not provocative in the slightest. Nope. Not one bit.

Weathering · 22-06-2013 06:34PM

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

I probably was out of order with my "you can't get a ride" comment, in fairness (childish comment, I'll admit) but I've been on this thing since 2007 (under a different profile name) and the CONSTANT animosity towards Irish women in AH gets on my tits to the extreme. Nothing can be discussed on here without people like weathering coming on and making it uncomfortable for female Boards posters. My comment was unreasonable but tbh, I'm fed up with this guff. This is not an all-male forum and Irish females post on here too, so we deserve respect. You (weathering) and posters of your ilk make it extremely unpleasant for Irish women like myself to contribute.

O right so what others have said before (NOT ME) gives you the justification personally attack me? That's real mature

Why do the Irish make such a big deal out of approaching members of the opposite sex?

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