Kids screaming in supermarkets - is it reaching breaking point?

Thom Merrilin · 21-06-2013 10:02PM

ShaShaBear wrote: »

Kids around that age throw tantrums. It's them testing limits to find out how much they can get away with. Sort of like an extension of what they did as babies. Since crying was the only way they could communicate a desire or need, and it most often resulted in getting them what they wanted/needed, it periodically extended as a learned behaviour into older children (toddlers mostly) where we have the responsibility of un-teaching them.

Ignoring a tantrum is what a lot of people would recommend. Giving in and attempting to "bribe" or hush the child is only encouraging the behaviour, thus re-enforcing that it will get them what they want. I can guarantee you that a lot of people ignoring their screaming children in a supermarket are twice as annoyed and embarrassed as you are.

And yes, your mother is lying. All children go through a small spat of throwing blindingly loud tantrums to get what they want. But it depends parent to parent how quickly a child grows out of it.

But is it fair to subject innocent members of the public to the screaming? While they are just trying to relax after work and pick up some shopping.

Why can't the parents do shopping at times when the little darlings don't have to be there? Get the father/brother/sister/grandmother/grandfather/uncle/aunt/friend to watch your child for an hour, especially if they are prone to tantrums and being a nuisance in public.

21-06-2013 10:03PM

There are plenty of things I've seen parents do that make my blood boil, but I can't fathom how screaming kids would be top of your list (or on it at all). Tantrums are part of being a child, learning to cope with things that you can't change, learning socially acceptable behaviour by testing boundaries, and also getting the chance to express yourself if you're teething or upset.

I was a very well behaved kid on the whole and I still screamed down a building or two. It's something children do.

If the child isn't actively harming you, I really don't see what your problem is OP. The parents ignoring the child are doing a far better job than if they gave in to the child just to give you a quieter shopping experience. You're a grown up - surely you can get over such a small thing for the sake of allowing a parent to parent?

My name is URL · 21-06-2013 10:03PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

There was toddler everywhere! Was she in Clonee Aldi?

Violent bunch down in Clonee

ShaShaBear · 21-06-2013 10:05PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

But is it fair to subject innocent members of the public to the screaming? While they are just trying to relax after work and pick up some shopping.

Why can't the parents do shopping at times when the little darlings don't have to be there? Get the father/brother/sister/grandmother/grandfather/uncle/aunt/friend to watch your child for an hour, especially if they are prone to tantrums and being a nuisance in public.

That's not always possible for some people. Most parents do right by their kids and the tantrums don't last more than a few months. Of course out in public you will see the worst of it. But its hardly fair to expect a poor hardworking mother who might have no choice but to leave their child in a creche all day and let someone else witness all of their firsts, just so they can afford nappies, to leave their child with yet another person while they go out and get a few groceries. Of course there are exceptions and generally bad or ignorant parents who just don't care, but you can't tar them all with the same brush!

Everyone has to get their bloody groceries like! I'm sure mothers arent on here making threads that some weird 30 year old bloke is wandering around Aldi staring at their kids :rolleyes:

darkdubh · 21-06-2013 10:08PM

The OP has a point.It is very annoying when the parents do nothing about it and you seem to get it everywhere from restaurants to shops.If i'd carried on like that when i was a kid my parents would have given me a clatter.

Gee_G · 21-06-2013 10:10PM

darkdubh wrote: »

The OP has a point.It is very annoying when the parents do nothing about it and you seem to get it everywhere from restaurants to shops.If i'd carried on like that when i was a kid my parents would have given me a clatter.

Then somebody would be on here starting a thread about seeing a parent hit their child in Aldi!!

SarahC91 · 21-06-2013 10:11PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

Where does it say in my post I shop with my mother at 30?

And even if you did wanna shop with your mother it shouldn't be of any concern to any ignorant people! Thats not even what this post is about!! So what age exactly should someone stop shopping with their mother? Just incase Im too old now! Idiots....

21-06-2013 10:12PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

But is it fair to subject innocent members of the public to the screaming? While they are just trying to relax after work and pick up some shopping.

Why can't the parents do shopping at times when the little darlings don't have to be there? Get the father/brother/sister/grandmother/grandfather/uncle/aunt/friend to watch your child for an hour, especially if they are prone to tantrums and being a nuisance in public.

Supermarkets aren't for relaxing after work. They're for shopping. If you need to relax you should go to a spa.

Why can't you do shopping at times when the little darlings wont be there?

Amirani · 21-06-2013 10:14PM

true-or-false wrote: »

Why can't you do shopping at times when the little darlings wont be there?

24 hour Tesco is great.

Thom Merrilin · 21-06-2013 10:15PM

SarahC91 wrote: »

And even if you did wanna shop with your mother it shouldn't be of any concern to any ignorant people! Thats not even what this post is about!! So what age exactly should someone stop shopping with their mother? Just incase Im too old now! Idiots....

Yeah! Feck the haters! I like shopping with my Lovely Irish Mammy. There I said it!

Thom Merrilin · 21-06-2013 10:17PM

NiallSparky wrote: »

24 hour Tesco is great.

The problem with that is the quality of fresh fruit and veg which makes up a large part of my shopping, is not the best at 2am

SarahC91 · 21-06-2013 10:18PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

Yeah! Feck the haters! I like shopping with my Lovely Irish Mammy. There I said it!

And so you should

haha! Who doesnt shop with their Mams like?! I never knew you had to stop at a certain age!!!

21-06-2013 10:20PM

Nimrod 7 wrote: »

Doras? They really are the worst if they named their kid 'door'

I don't know, I always found the name colleen bizarre. Hello, my name is girl.

Apparently I was never one for throwing tantrums, too quiet all the time.
Ignoring them is supposed to be the way to go all right

ShaShaBear · 21-06-2013 10:23PM

bluewolf wrote: »

I don't know, I always found the name colleen bizarre. Hello, my name is girl.

Apparently I was never one for throwing tantrums, too quiet all the time.
Ignoring them is supposed to be the way to go all right

I was out with a good friend of mine when she demonstrated to me that her 2 year old daughter always threw a tantrum when passing the ice-cream stand in the local shopping centre. It was always a nightmare for her, she had to take an extra 20 minutes out just so she could walk the whole way around the building and back again to avoid it. When we got within 5 feet of it, she went absolutely nuts. I mean bat-****. And I know this woman long enough to know she wasn't encouraging it. She simply ignored it, and after about 10 minutes the kid had forgotten all about it. But she got a lot of stares, some tuts and even a few downright rude people telling her to control her child. I'm not really sure what people expected her to do.

Gillo · 21-06-2013 10:27PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

The problem with that is the quality of fresh fruit and veg which makes up a large part of my shopping, is not the best at 2am

By the time you've your shop done head into smithfield market, I think it opens about 3am??

caustic 1 · 21-06-2013 10:33PM

Beat them up n down the aisles with a baguette, should sort them out.

Itwasntme. · 21-06-2013 10:37PM

goose2005 wrote: »

Yeah, at the fruit market in Kigali you never hear children screaming and yelling.

:pac::pac: You chose the wrong random city because I've never heard kids screaming at fruit markets in Kigali. In fact, you almost never see kids throw the kind of tantrums in Kigali at least, that you see here in the west.

suicide_circus · 21-06-2013 10:43PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

fresh fruit and veg which makes up a large part of my shopping

well la dee ****ing daa

JustAThought · 21-06-2013 11:01PM

darkdubh wrote: »

The OP has a point.It is very annoying when the parents do nothing about it and you seem to get it everywhere from restaurants to shops.If i'd carried on like that when i was a kid my parents would have given me a clatter.

I was out yesterday & heard a woman giving out to her child for being rude to another child. It really stood out - I hadn't heard a child being corrected by its parent in absolutely ages.

Kids are let run amuk in the
Most inappropriate places & others are increasingly being forced to put up with their bad behaviour . Stop them young I say & show them manners & what is & isn't acceptable.

Spent a few Months in France last year & it simply didnt happen there. Not in shops, or the metro, or in parks or in restaurants did I encounter any of the sort of badly managed & behaved children that are increasingly the norm here.

Rubbish in , rubbish out .

It really

PizzamanIRL · 21-06-2013 11:03PM

Get over it. They're kids.

If the parents shout at them to stop, you'll be on here making threads about parents being cruel shouting at their kids.

Please Kill Me · 21-06-2013 11:17PM

Thom Merrilin wrote: »

Is she though? It seems you can't even go shopping any time of the day now without being subjected to this crap. Anyone around in the 80's remember was it as bad?

Jeez, I don't know - I'm in my local Tesco at least once a day, every day....and I've never come across it. Maybe you should go to a different store!

In fairness, what are the parents to do with the aforementioned screaming kids? Beat them within an inch of their life? Gag and bind them? Leave them in the boot of the car so as not to be an annoyance to passing motorists too? Seriously, if that's all you have to complain about, I feel sorry for you.

Ciarabear · 21-06-2013 11:24PM

No all children most certainly do not throw tantrums at all. That's just a cop out used by deluded parents who have no means of controlling their little darlings meltdowns.

Chucken · 21-06-2013 11:27PM

Ciarabear wrote: »

No all children most certainly do not throw tantrums at all. That's just a cop out used by deluded parents who have no means of controlling their little darlings meltdowns.

So...tell us how you would deal with a tantrum?

paddydriver · 21-06-2013 11:28PM

Ah kids of today.. never happened 30 years ago... My feckin arse it didn't!

Ciarabear · 21-06-2013 11:29PM

Chucken wrote: »

So...tell us how you would deal with a tantrum?

Prevention is better than cure!

Czarcasm · 21-06-2013 11:29PM

shruikan2553 wrote: »

You cannot win, you dont have a child therefor you automatically lose in an arguement against someone who does

Nothing against you personally shruikan, but I hate that sort of bullshìt perspective with a passion! We were all children once yknow, and we all have relations who have children. I have a child myself and he doesn't act like a ferral, indisciplined little prick with no manners or social skills when I take him shopping with me, but rather he'll push the trolley and do the shopping and all I have to do is follow around after him.

There's a thing called teaching your children to be responsible, and unfortunately there's but a small minority of parents are of the school of thought that says "ah shure they're just kids!".

They are, and it's an adult's job to act as their role model and teach them how to behave, not just let them treat the supermarket like it's their own personal playground and make excuses for them after the fact.

Femme_Fatale · 21-06-2013 11:30PM

I rarely if ever witness this in the supermarket.

JustAThought wrote: »

Stop them young I say & show them manners & what is & isn't acceptable.

Don't you think several other parents would have the same view as you, yet despite all their good intentions it's not as straightforward as that?
How young to you think you should stop them? Babies and toddlers don't have much of a concept of boundaries.

Chucken · 21-06-2013 11:35PM

Ciarabear wrote: »

Prevention is better than cure!

Agreed. But lets suppose you had to deal with it?

The best way is to ignore it!

Theres one thing I have noticed if I'm shopping in the city during the week.
(Not so much here in a small town)

Parents collecting the children from school and then heading to the shops.
I always feel for the children because they need to be fed/get out of their uniform/get outside to play. More often than not either parent or child will lose their cool.

Username99 · 21-06-2013 11:37PM

frozenfrozen wrote: »

Why were you shopping with your mother if you're 30?

Because his mother does everything for him and always has, that is why he was never crying when he was younger, he had nothing to cry about.

Pumpkinseeds · 21-06-2013 11:41PM

I remember my mother telling me a story about how I threw so many tantrums after my brother was born that she felt like she was going to crack up. It sounds like I was an out and out b*tch, nothing new there:D Anyway this particular day I'd smeared sudocream all over my brother and generally driven her demented before we'd gotten to the supermarket.

Apparently I was doing the spoilt brat tantrum bit and I just lay down on the floor at the checkout and pounded the floor and screamed and roared so she picked me up, carried me out and gave me a sharp slap to the back of the legs or, as she put it 'I took the legs from under you'.

She said everyone turned and glared at her and she felt mortified, but I never did it again. We very seldom got slapped when we were kids but when we did we deserved it and they weren't beatings. I can understand parents trying to ignore a tantrum, what does really pi*s me off though is the parents who let their kids run riot around shops. There's no excuse for that, it really is pi*s poor parenting. If parents can't be bothered to supervise their kids they shouldn't have them.

I know parents can't watch every move their kids make but too many parents don't give a monkeys how much annoyance their kids cause to other people, so long as they're not bothering them.

I'm 40 now so I guess some things never change, kids will always have tantrums.

Kids screaming in supermarkets - is it reaching breaking point?

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