How do you get to Hell ?

Sarky · 29-03-2013 02:39AM

C.K Dexter Haven wrote: »

I'm only a beginner- need to pace myself. Besides, every time I hear/read/see "John Waters" name, I think of Sinead O'Connor- then I need to pace myself some more.
Sooner or later, I'll need a pacemaker

Mixed up your priorities there. Remember, Waters lost a custody case against O'conner. The law considers her a more sane and capable human being than him. Let that sink in for a few minutes. And then gouge out your eyes and set yourself on fire, as is the only sensible reaction to a fact like that.

Ruu · 29-03-2013 02:42AM

I took the bus, driver was a bit of a bastid!

Smidge · 29-03-2013 02:43AM

Take the N4 from Dublin to Sligo, when you hit Leitrim........
Your questions has been answered OP:pac:

uch · 29-03-2013 02:44AM

Madam_X wrote: »

Enjoy them! (expletives removed)

Nah, don't know what you're talking about

Madam_X · 29-03-2013 02:46AM

Really? You don't know what I meant in the first post you queried, where I said "Enjoy the f'ucking sh1t out of them!" (meaning: enjoy them - sounds yum, no badness intended

).

heyjude · 29-03-2013 02:49AM

I think there's a Highway to take you there....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8B0PJkS0iyk

uch · 29-03-2013 02:49AM

Madam_X wrote: »

Really? You don't know what I meant in the first post you queried, where I said "Enjoy the f'ucking sh1t out of them!" (meaning: enjoy them - sounds yum, no badness intended ).

too many expletives can't understand * stars, sorry

C.K Dexter Haven · 29-03-2013 02:50AM

Sarky wrote: »

Mixed up your priorities there. Remember, Waters lost a custody case against O'conner. The law considers her a more sane and capable human being than him. Let that sink in for a few minutes. And then gouge out your eyes and set yourself on fire, as is the only sensible reaction to a fact like that.

Yea, but, she did sing Mandinka. It was a perfect antidote to Enya's Orinoco Flow- if you weren't there you wouldn't understand

uch · 29-03-2013 02:52AM

Sorry Madam_x, see told you I was drunk and eating a rasher sambo

Ruudi_Mentari · 29-03-2013 03:00AM

ohh keep it up, sure you're on the right track. your ship has sailed... for the hell that is your guilty conscience.

I will say a prayer for your waistline.

uch · 29-03-2013 03:01AM

Ruudi_Mentari wrote: »

ohh keep it up, sure you're on the right track. your ship has sailed... for the hell that is your guilty conscience.

I will say a prayer for your waistline.

So that's two rashers and three Sausages on toast for you

Ruudi_Mentari · 29-03-2013 03:05AM

uch wrote: »

So that's two rashers and three Sausages on toast for you

..smoked? streaky.

Ruudi_Mentari · 29-03-2013 03:12AM

does what's in the belly carry over if not processed yet

OneArt · 29-03-2013 03:33AM

Ihatecuddles wrote: »

Bum sex.

It's how some get to heaven.

29-03-2013 04:05AM

uch wrote: »

I'm drinking Beer and eating a rasher sambo with my left hand, so as popular religions go (Christian, Muslim & Jewish) I'm goin to Hell

Well according to some branches of Christianity the only one true - hell bound - unforgivable sin is denial or cursing of the holy spirit.

This is based I believe around some passage in "Matthew", 12 I think, and another one in mark.....3ish.... which says that all sins can be forgiven except blasphemy against the holy spirit.

"he who blasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness" "whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit, it will not be forgiven him"

So if you are looking for some sure fire way to get down to hell were all the horny sluts are well up for it.... while you look up at the pretty pink clouds at all the virgins singing "kum by yah my lord" and dreaming about getting laid..... then bad mouthing the silent partner in the oft spewed notion of the trinity seems to be the way to go.

Of course there is another large branch of Christianity that thinks all the people who subscribe to what I wrote above are totally deluded and are not "real Christians (tm)" and cant understand a) how they reached such a position and think their brand of Christianity is total nonsense and b) why they are saying the exact same thing as a) about them.

retalivity · 29-03-2013 04:18AM

OP, you said you were in ulaanbataar but didnt specify anywhere more local than that.
So, working from downtown you can get to Hell like this - http://goo.gl/maps/WRe3s

Be warned that it will take you almost 5 days, what with those pesky russian border crossings, so you will not be there in time for easter.
I think they already have their own sausages and beer in Hell, but as Norway is an expensive country you may want to bring some with you.

MadsL · 29-03-2013 04:20AM

C.K Dexter Haven wrote: »

Left turn at Albuquerque.
Bugs Bunny always avoided that route- now I know why.

Oi!

Was gonna say take the N4, but then realised that's Leitrim.

29-03-2013 05:06AM

zenno wrote: »

Come through my magic door and I will show you hell.

More detailed instructions on passing the gateway to Hell can be found here: Just be warned, it's a very complicated and intricate code only the top 1% of humanity will grasp.

Smidge · 29-03-2013 05:20AM

Smidge wrote: »

Take the N4 from Dublin to Sligo, when you hit Leitrim........
Your questions has been answered OP:pac:

MadsL wrote: »

Oi!

Was gonna say take the N4, but then realised that's Leitrim.

:pac:

zenno · 29-03-2013 05:31AM

Deleted User wrote: »

More detailed instructions on passing the gateway to Hell can be found here: Just be warned, it's a very complicated and intricate code only the top 1% of humanity will grasp.

I'm angered here after watching that bosco magic door sh1t. listening to that squeaky voice.

Right i'll need a few more full shell casings into me to rid that squeaky fecker from my mind.

That was not the magic door i was talking about... this is...

Ruudi_Mentari · 29-03-2013 06:30AM

http://hellpizza.com/ie/stores/region/dublin/

MomijiHime · 29-03-2013 09:24AM

http://jigokutsushin.co.nr/

Write your name on it

handlemaster · 29-03-2013 09:31AM

with good intensions

Grand Moff Tarkin · 29-03-2013 09:45AM

Any road leading to Dublin.

Pumpkinseeds · 29-03-2013 10:26AM

handlemaster wrote: »

with good intensions

If the road to hell is paved with good intentions, perhaps the OP should take up block laying or tarmacking:p

How do you get to Hell ?

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