How do you greet someone on a date ?

Czarcasm · 27-01-2013 12:24AM

1ZRed wrote: »

Kinda depends on the rubber doesn't it :pac:

Rubbing someone up the wrong way though can have disastrous consequences for a date! :pac:

efb · 27-01-2013 12:26AM

mines bigger- I'm top

Big Nasty · 27-01-2013 12:44AM

Start off with 'Howeya doin'?' and finish it off with 'on your face or in your ass?'

Larianne · 27-01-2013 12:49AM

This is the correct answer -

Stealth Recce wrote: »

A gentle hand shake and peck on the cheek

Praetorian Saighdiuir · 27-01-2013 12:52AM

Larianne wrote: »

This is the correct answer -

/Gentleman

1ZRed · 27-01-2013 01:02AM

Czarcasm wrote: »

Rubbing someone up the wrong way though can have disastrous consequences for a date! :pac:

so don't be so hasty to slip a finger 'round the back on the first date :P

old hippy · 27-01-2013 01:17AM

Remember to place your cape upon the puddle, lest the lady should inconvenience her footwear. Hold open the door of her carriage, as she returns to her residence, no later than the hour upon which has been decided in writing by her papa or mater. Allow a period of perhaps one to two months to pass before suggesting a second date. Be more adventurous this time round and have the butler prepare a handsome picnic. Or a trip to the dancehall. This season it is not considered scandalous behaviour to modestly gyrate to the latest waltz.

If you beau is a handsome young buck, gad around town raising merry but polite hell with the chap and enjoy some brandy and cigars at a gentlemen's club of taste and decorum. Be sure to end the pleasant evening wrestling naked by the fireside to enrich your masculinity and promote an enormous sense of well being.

smellsfunny · 27-01-2013 01:24AM

you immediatly pounce and go for her funny area. Not a finger but the whole fist and get it right up their. It really eases the tension.

Sent from HTC Desire on 02 from Mountjoy prison.

TheUsual · 27-01-2013 01:37AM

Wow, your photoshop skills are level 11.

*true story*

Ruudi_Mentari · 27-01-2013 01:46AM

With your eyes, like Charlie Chaplin never actually speak.. this could prove detrimental trip over your cane; maybe. Like funny, sweet man bedazzled

Cee-Jay-Cee · 27-01-2013 01:57AM

badabing106 wrote: »

Is a one armed hug okay ?

Have you only got one arm? If not then dont be so lazy and use both. Lazy fecker.

smellsfunny · 27-01-2013 02:05AM

If ever in doubt just ask yourself What would charlie sheen do.

Itwasntme. · 27-01-2013 02:26AM

This thread needs a sprinkling of female aggression for flavour: I usually grab the man's crotch and ask, 'how's it hanging?'

old hippy · 27-01-2013 02:28AM

Itwasntme. wrote: »

This thread needs a sprinkling of female aggression for flavour: I usually grab the man's crotch and ask, 'how's it hanging?'

You, sir, are a WOMAN :eek:

Bad Santa · 27-01-2013 02:31AM

"Sorry I'm late. Had to go to an Internet Cafe to print out the Group On voucher."

Itwasntme. · 27-01-2013 02:35AM

old hippy wrote: »

You, sir, are a WOMAN :eek:

The 'sir' in your post is said with such conviction that I hesitated for a second and felt my crotch area. It was with great relief that I noted the absence of balls.

old hippy · 27-01-2013 02:45AM

Itwasntme. wrote: »

The 'sir' in your post is said with such conviction that I hesitated for a second and felt my crotch area. It was with great relief that I noted the absence of balls.

With such a shocking approach to the genre of dating, I daresay it won't be too long before you do find a pair of gentlemen's dumplings 'twixt your perfumed garden :eek:

I was not aware that women had access to the internet; perhaps you are a sufferagette or some kind of anarchist?

Itwasntme. · 27-01-2013 02:51AM

old hippy wrote: »

With such a shocking approach to the genre of dating, I daresay it won't be too long before you do find a pair of gentlemen's dumplings 'twixt your perfumed garden :eek:

I was not aware that women had access to the internet; perhaps you are a sufferagette or some kind of anarchist?

The men must like my approach to dating seeing as the bit in bold happens quite often

.

Suffragette is quite right my good man- burned bras, unrestrained bosoms and all.

old hippy · 27-01-2013 03:01AM

Itwasntme. wrote: »

The men must like my approach to dating seeing as the bit in bold happens quite often .

Suffragette is quite right my good man- burned bras, unrestrained bosoms and all.

Madame, I hope you keep your bosoms in check, should ever our paths collide. Apart from the frightfully inclement weather, the mere sight of uncovered womanly flesh can send a gentle chap into paroxysms. Cousin Delia was seen dining in a fashionable restaurant with a neckline that can only be described as "plunging" and the casualties from that fallout were massive. Cleavage should remain strapped down or in the paintings adorning the walls of galleries and museums, my good lady.

I think I need that brandy, now. The mere thought of unbridled melons has me come over all queer and floundering.

Fromthetrees · 27-01-2013 03:01AM

Just stick out the tongue, no lips, just tongue, no touching, just tongue, no winking, just tongue yeh ya got the idea.

downwithpeace · 27-01-2013 03:07AM

Your buying right?

gobnaitolunacy · 27-01-2013 10:51AM

How's ur belly for a lodger?

Vicar in a tutu · 27-01-2013 10:56AM

Say '' Ugh'' and shoulder past them as hard as you can and go home, treat em mean to keep em keen

Huckster · 27-01-2013 11:19AM

Bad Santa wrote: »

"Sorry I'm late. Had to go to an Internet Cafe to print out the Group On voucher."

Has actually happened me...
It was then followed by a cringingly terrible display of him arguing loudly with the waiter when the bill came because he managed to misread the voucher and thought it would cover more of the meal. It was one of those small intimate restaurants too, and loads of the other customers were craning their necks with bemused looks on their faces...

Oh the shame...

Joe10000 · 27-01-2013 11:29AM

What a perfect thread for AH, very funny lads.

However the answer is one hand on back/hip area and a kiss on the cheek.

Handshake is a big no no on a first date, too formal.

Oranage2 · 27-01-2013 11:48AM

First as you're walking towards the lady stop about 5ft away and eye her up head to toe and say "meh, it'll do".

Approach the lady with an arms wide open hug, give her a strong hug to show how strong you are, also smell her hair, this will show the lady she interests you.

Sit down and order her a salad, you get steak.

Make sure to ask the waiter for the strongest cheapest wine and order several bottles.

Leave and bring the lady home and fornicate.

Next day say "I'll call you later" but don't.

jaffacakesyum · 27-01-2013 01:20PM

Funny answers aside

I actually don't know the answer to this

Handshake is way too formal. Kiss on the cheek could be awkward if both parties don't know it's coming :pac: And then what about blind dates or a first date where you don't know the girl that well? Would you still kiss on the cheek?

One of life's greatest mysteries

jd007 · 27-01-2013 03:50PM

Hi, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Bad Santa · 27-01-2013 11:44PM

Huckster wrote: »

Has actually happened me...
It was then followed by a cringingly terrible display of him arguing loudly with the waiter when the bill came because he managed to misread the voucher and thought it would cover more of the meal. It was one of those small intimate restaurants too, and loads of the other customers were craning their necks with bemused looks on their faces...
Oh the shame...

Fair enough, but you could've at least had sex with me.

Sprouts · 28-01-2013 12:01AM

Have your lad hanging out of your zip and pull out your pockets and ask her is there an elephant in the room?

How do you greet someone on a date ?

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