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When all the weddings dry up, it's a good thing

2

Comments

  • #32
    starlings
    Closed Accounts Posts: 683 ✭✭✭starlings


    thier wrote: »
    I won't be having a wedding with more than 5 people at it (including myself and himself) for this very reason.
    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    You, your intended wife/husband, the registrar, 2 witnesses.

    Some craig dude. Some craic.

    bit mean... not every couple want the fuss of a big wedding, and it's their day. And thier's day :) and I'm sure it'll be lovely for them.


  • #33
    SunnyDub1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,439 ✭✭✭SunnyDub1


    To be fair the amount of money a Friend can sometimes expect you to spend on a wedding can be a shocking amount.

    For example my cousin had this idea in her head of wanting to go to Vegas for her hens :eek: She's watching To much films :rolleyes:


  • #34
    starlings
    Closed Accounts Posts: 683 ✭✭✭starlings


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    To be fair the amount of money a Friend can sometimes expect you to spend on a wedding can be a shocking amount.

    For example my cousin had this idea in her head of wanting to go to Vegas for her hens :eek: She's watching To much films :rolleyes:

    If they're a friend, you can explain that it's too expensive for you. If they still insist, they're not really a friend.


  • #35
    kunst nugget
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,375 ✭✭✭✭kunst nugget


    Froyo wrote: »
    When it's my turn, it'll be abroad somewhere nice, somewhere quiet with family and actual friends and it'll be carried out as though it actually means something.

    Funny thing is, for the bride and groom most of the stuff you're giving out about means something to them on the day. You that foreign wedding you'll have that will mean something will actually just mean something just to you and your other half and will probably mean nothing to your guests beyond the worry of how much it's cost them for flights and hotels.

    And I'm with the OP. After ten years of weddings I'm glad to see them slowing down and the possibility of a year with none on the horizon.


  • #36
    hooradiation
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,922 ✭✭✭hooradiation


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    For example my cousin had this idea in her head of wanting to go to Vegas for her hens

    That sounds like great fun.
    Why do you hate fun?


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  • #37
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    starlings wrote: »
    bit mean... not every couple want the fuss of a big wedding, and it's their day. And thier's day :) and I'm sure it'll be lovely for them.

    That's true. I apologise.


  • #38
    Larianne
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    Deleted User wrote: »
    You learn pretty quickly that you don't need to spend a fortune to look nice.

    Some people don't. Spend a fortune on clothes and still look shíte. :pac:
    starlings wrote: »
    If they're a friend, you can explain that it's too expensive for you. If they still insist, they're not really a friend.

    Have you ever read any of the threads in the Wedding & Marriage forum? Jeez, the stress and pressure some people are put under by family and friends getting married!!

    Only been to one wedding myself so the jurys out on whether they're fun or not. Not a huge fan of big social events. :cool:


  • #39
    Knockout_91
    Closed Accounts Posts: 135 ✭✭Knockout_91


    Spent about 3 years working at weddings and never have I been so depressed! When "time of your life" came on my heart used to sink! Ugh. I look at the bride and groom and wonder how long it'll last. My god I am a negative creature


  • #40
    the groutch
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,096 ✭✭✭✭the groutch


    don't get this whole thing of them looking for cash in the card.
    that's something for kids' birthdays, not weddings.
    no way I'm paying for their wedding & honeymoon.


  • #41
    Knockout_91
    Closed Accounts Posts: 135 ✭✭Knockout_91


    the groutch wrote: »
    don't get this whole thing of them looking for cash in the card.
    that's something for kids' birthdays, not weddings.
    no way I'm paying for their wedding & honeymoon.

    Cash in a card? What's this? When the OP said cash in a card I thought it was his money for drinks


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  • #42
    Fighting Irish
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,062 ✭✭✭Fighting Irish


    Leftist wrote: »
    I reject invitations. Couldn't give two sugars about some attention seeking religious ceremony dedicated to celebrating some relationship I don't care about.
    It's a woman's thing anyway. Massive burden for blokes.

    It's an expensive piss up, but usually worth it


  • #43
    SunnyDub1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,439 ✭✭✭SunnyDub1


    hooradiation wrote: »
    That sounds like great fun.
    Why do you hate fun?

    Sounds like fun but also very pricey fun, not everyone is financially comfortable to pay to go to Vegas for 4 night for a hens, as well as pay for accomadtion for a wedding etc.
    If she had of gave us some notice (months) I would have reconsidered,saved up and looked upon it has a lil Holiday as well as a hens but to expect 8 girls to pay for a trip to Vegas in 2 months time is a bit much.

    Anyways we all laughed off the idea and she soon came back to reality :)


  • #44
    the groutch
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,096 ✭✭✭✭the groutch


    Knockout_91 wrote: »
    Cash in a card? What's this? When the OP said cash in a card I thought it was his money for drinks

    apparently it's the new thing that you're not allowed to buy presents anymore and have to give them cashmoney instead.


  • #45
    starlings
    Closed Accounts Posts: 683 ✭✭✭starlings


    Larianne wrote: »

    Have you ever read any of the threads in the Wedding & Marriage forum? Jeez, the stress and pressure some people are put under by family and friends getting married!!

    I have read some of it in PI too, but I don't understand why people don't just say no. Weddings are supposed to be the cementing of a relationship, not the splintering of a network of relationships. If difficult people end up not talking to you over it - bonus!


  • #46
    Madam_X
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,327 ✭✭✭Madam_X


    the groutch wrote: »
    apparently it's the new thing that you're not allowed to buy presents anymore and have to give them cashmoney instead.
    Normal people are grateful for either. Only a handful of weirdos write "Cash gifts only" on the invitation; they're not representative of most people who get married.


  • #47
    gimmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,296 ✭✭✭✭gimmick


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    I think funerals are far more spiritual and meaningful than weddings. They really make you appreciate life more. Can't stand weddings and would never inflict one on anyone else.
    Leftist wrote: »
    I reject invitations. Couldn't give two sugars about some attention seeking religious ceremony dedicated to celebrating some relationship I don't care about.
    It's a woman's thing anyway. Massive burden for blokes.

    Such hatred. Such negativity.

    If you like your friends, you will attend their wedding as you, presumably anyway, like seeing your friends happy.

    Saying a funeral makes you appreciate life more is possibly the most nihilist thing I have ever read on this forum. Good grief.

    Re the OP - we had 4 last year including our own. Have 5 this year which would have been 6 if it wasn't for a date clash. 2 ways of looking at it - "ugh the expense" or "woohoo, some great sessions lie ahead with my friends". Of course you can look at it both ways as well depending on your mood.

    A friend of mine summed it up a few years ago when someone was complaining about having a crap load of weddings in the summer - "wait until you are in your 40s, and have kids, you will long for the days of yore and wonder what you were whinging about!".
    starlings wrote: »
    I have read some of it in PI too, but I don't understand why people don't just say no. Weddings are supposed to be the cementing of a relationship, not the splintering of a network of relationships. If difficult people end up not talking to you over it - bonus!

    TBF, internet forums are not the place to talk about weddings as you have some very scary "experts" and an awful lot of mega bitter people giving advice".
    Madam_X wrote: »
    Normal people are grateful for either. Only a handful of weirdos write "Cash gifts only" on the invitation; they're not representative of most people who get married.

    Worst I heard of was "suggested donation".

    With regard to cash gifts though - I always think they are best as some people can buy you some awful horrible shít which will end up in the SVP store or in the attic within a few weeks.


  • #48
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 12,694 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Rituals are important to humans life is full of them christenings/naming ceremonies/Debs/twenty firsts/marriages/ birthdays/ wedding anniversaries and funerals!

    Think on to a time when a lot of you social outings are funerals.


  • #49
    gabsdot40
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 355 ✭✭gabsdot40


    We've started to be invited to weddings as friends of the parents of bride / groom.


  • #50
    conorhal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,097 ✭✭✭conorhal


    Leftist wrote: »
    I reject invitations. Couldn't give two sugars about some attention seeking religious ceremony dedicated to celebrating some relationship I don't care about.
    It's a woman's thing anyway. Massive burden for blokes.

    She said no then? Bummer dude.


  • #51
    wonder88
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 144 ✭✭wonder88


    I am another one who has only been putting 50 in the envelop, no wonder I have not been invited to a local upcoming one. However I have declined a fair few invitations in recent years as I get older. Funerals are becoming more regular in my social life lately as I am in my 40's. While I am by nature a "quite person" sport, and to a lesser extend cultural occasions mean I have plenty of social outings. However I notice that a lot of people actually look forward to weddings of friends, neighbours.


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  • #52
    April O Neill
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,305 ✭✭✭April O Neill


    Madam_X wrote: »
    The "I hate weddings and I don't care about the people getting married and religious entity derp derp derp" stuff just sounds like whiny teenagers/people with few or no friends.

    No they don't. :confused: Hate is too strong a word, but lots of people dislike them, and that's their call.

    I like them... in small doses.


  • #53
    April O Neill
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,305 ✭✭✭April O Neill


    gimmick wrote: »
    Saying a funeral makes you appreciate life more is possibly the most nihilist thing I have ever read on this forum. Good grief.

    What's wrong with that? :confused:


  • #54
    GalwayGuy2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,269 ✭✭✭GalwayGuy2


    apparently it's the new thing that you're not allowed to buy presents anymore and have to give them cashmoney instead.
    ]

    Hope it's anonymous:S

    Hmm, I wonder do you ever look at funerals as a social thing? As in saying goodbye to someone who'd lived a long life and, you know, you'll be dead soon, sort of thing?


  • #55
    Hobbes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,264 ✭✭✭✭Hobbes


    kneemos wrote: »
    Funerals next op.

    Births->Christenings->Communion->Confirmation and a few deaths sprinkled in (hopefully not the kids).


  • #56
    PizzamanIRL
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,147 ✭✭✭PizzamanIRL


    You know they're just trying to be nice by inviting you. You don't actually have to go to every one.

    Your friends see you as a cash cow.


  • #57
    Akrasia
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 24,091 ✭✭✭✭Akrasia


    When you have a big family and friends that are scattered around the world, the only times you get to meet everyone is either a wedding or a funeral. We've had a whole bunch of funerals recently. Weddings are much better.

    Ban billionaires



  • #58
    Rabidlamb
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,202 ✭✭✭Rabidlamb


    The final few weddings out of our group we dodged the church completely.
    Saved taking a day of work if it was a weekday wedding, turn up at 5:30pm for the sit down at 6pm.
    The dearest taxi was still way cheaper than the hotel.


  • #59
    Jogathon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 516 ✭✭✭Jogathon


    BillyMitchel wrote: »
    Fock , i've only been putting 50 in but its just been me. Is that too little?? Stags, gargle, hotels, coke and brazzers dont come cheap and I've no one to split the cost with :o

    I tend to go to weddings on my own. I put €100 in the card and always buy a nice little present that I know the couple will like. The last two weddings I bought some mini oven dishes in funky colours from Le Creuset for about €30. Maybe for an aquaintance I wouldn't bother with the small personal gift but €100 is what I would give. €200 if going as a couple.


  • #60
    Doc Ruby
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,956 ✭✭✭Doc Ruby


    starlings wrote: »
    Weddings are supposed to be the cementing of a relationship
    Aye, cementing them and dropping them in the bay.


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  • #61
    kunst nugget
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,375 ✭✭✭✭kunst nugget


    Rabidlamb wrote: »
    The final few weddings out of our group we dodged the church completely.
    Saved taking a day of work if it was a weekday wedding, turn up at 5:30pm for the sit down at 6pm.
    The dearest taxi was still way cheaper than the hotel.

    Friday weddings are alright but weddings earlier on in the week are a bit of a pain in the hoop. Any of those weekday weddings I've recently attended I've just taken the day off driven to the wedding, not drank and driven back that night.


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