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Abortion

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Comments

  • #392
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    That's a bit OTT. It's not like childless couples are going around impregnating unsuspecting women against their wishes. But if women want to be allowed to treat their unborn essentially, as something to be discarded, then does it not make sense for someone to argue, "well, hang on, if you dont want it can I have it?".

    I met a homeless guy a while ago who told me he had seen a well known cafe/snaack bar throwing out food at the end of the day (perfectly good sandwiches etc) and he asked if he could have one bc he was starving and they threw them in the bin in front of him.

    Cue onslaught of "gestating a baby is not like making a sandwich" but I'm just showing another (less extreme) example of the "I dont want it but I dont want anyone else to have it" mentality (actually I'm pretty sure I had an ex like that lol)

    A sandwich doesn't make 40 weeks to make. That period of time and the visible effects of pregnancy are a big factor in why adoption is not ideal for some women.


  • #393
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Millicent wrote: »
    Not to mention that if you were married (I don't know if you were at the time), you simply wouldn't have had the option.

    Exactly, I keep forgetting that point. Yep I'm married, was married at the time so it was never going to be an option anyway.


  • #394
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    I'm glad my adopted brother's mother choose to endure the "stigma" of giving her baby away (to my wonderful parents!!!) than killing him in-utero.

    Me too! I'm not adopted but I'm happy your brother is safe! :)


  • #395
    up for anything
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,790 ✭✭✭up for anything


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    It matters alot man, some people are literally psychopathic, have no empathy for others and would probably have 4-5 abortions! We don't want abortion here. We have more respect for babies!

    Is this the royal We? :rolleyes:


  • #396
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    But the stigma of abortion you were prepared too face?

    Abortion's a lot more private than an adoption, unless we go back to spiriting girls away to "minding a sick aunt" for the duration of the pregnancy.


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  • #397
    Jaxxy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,297 ✭✭✭Jaxxy


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    I have alot of empathy for good people! I'd support my friend with anything regardless of how badly it affected me, I care about good people just as much as myself but theirs certain things that I cannot accept; It's not one of those things I could change my opinion on, I can't help how I feel. I feel it's terribly wrong and highly selfish.

    Selective empathy? :confused:
    Why not carry the baby and give it up for adoption! Like think about it, that baby could live to be 80 and have 5 kids and 25 grandchildren! I dunno how anyone can justify abortion except from unusual cases of medical emergency or rape. As I said, someone who is raped and carries the baby and gives it up for adoption is a hero to me. I would have NOTHING but respect for them.

    Why not, indeed? I'm sure many people have many reasons for having an abortion. Reasons that are pertinent to them and are their own business. I sincerely doubt any rape victim would care that somewhere, out there, someone like you thinks they're a hero for carrying a baby that they do not want, never wanted and didn't ask for, to term. I also sincerely doubt that just because you think that they are would have any bearing on their ultimate decision. At the end of the day, it is their decision, and nothing at all to do with you.
    There's alot of couples out there who are heart broken cause they can't have a baby and they are sickened at people having abortions whilst they are trying so desperately to have a baby. So it is other peoples buisiness! Certain private matters do affect other people and hence are other peoples buisiness!

    I have to be honest, I absolutely DETEST this argument. Not everyone wants children. Not everyone has to have a child, just because there is someone out there who might not be able to. And to suggest that this is someone else's business? Ridiculous. What kind of person actually believes that another individual's desire or ability to have children or to not have children is their business? :eek:
    Just give the baby up for adoption and let him/her have an honest chance in the race of life. We are one of the very few mammals who have such a disregard for our offspring. Rats are better mothers than some woman! Don't get me wrong, alot of woman are very good mothers and us men couldn't live without a woman, we wouldn't know what was going on if the woman dissapeared.

    Are you saying that men wouldn't know what to do in life without women? What does this mean?


  • #398
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Mickeroo wrote: »
    Did you dislike her before you found out? Do you know her reasons for having it? True it's your perogative and fair play for not making a song and dance about it but that doesn't make it any less judgemental really.

    Perhaps, but tbh we live in an age where the accusation of being "judgemental" is thrown about for anyone who dares to stand up for what they believe in or who has a view that others do not agree with. If distancing myself from someone who makes me feel uncomfortable is being "judgemental" then I am happy to be :)

    Her reason? She simply didn't want it.


  • #399
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Exactly, I keep forgetting that point. Yep I'm married, was married at the time so it was never going to be an option anyway.

    Huh? Married people can give babies up for adoption like anyone else can't they? It's sure better than havin' an abortion!


  • #400
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    But the stigma of abortion you were prepared too face?

    Very few people know about it. Maybe 3 max that I know in real life and I was only told people I was sure would not judge me.


  • #401
    LeeHoffmann
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭LeeHoffmann


    Not to mention that if you were married (I don't know if you were at the time), you simply wouldn't have had the option.
    Are you saying that it´s illegal to give a baby up for adoption if you´re married? :confused:


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  • #402
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    up for anything wrote: »
    Is this the royal We? :rolleyes:
    There's more than one person in Ireland who does not want abortion here you know. Perhaps thats what he meant?


  • #403
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    OldNotWIse wrote: »

    Her reason? She simply didn't want it.

    But in all sincerity, is it not better that she didn't have the child rather than a child be born that knows it is resented and unwanted? Because in a lot of cases, the child would definitely know, whether the mother admitted it or not, because of how he/she was treated throughout their life.


  • #404
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Very few people know about it. Maybe 3 max that I know in real life and I was only told people I was sure would not judge me.

    Just don't do it again! I know I can't tell you what to do, but it's not fair and deep down you know that. You might have convinced yourself it is fair but if you really think hard you know it's not.

    Like just imagine your mum aborted you! Would that be fair?


  • #405
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Millicent wrote: »
    A sandwich doesn't make 40 weeks to make. That period of time and the visible effects of pregnancy are a big factor in why adoption is not ideal for some women.

    Can't believe I made an effort to explain the fact that it was an example of a similar mindset as opposed to a direct comparison, and someone still started bleating about babies not being the same as sandwiches...sigh...


  • #406
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    LeeHoffmann wrote: »
    Are you saying that it´s illegal to give a baby up for adoption if you´re married? :confused:

    Yep, unless the High Court decides otherwise. (Link)


  • #407
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    Perhaps, but tbh we live in an age where the accusation of being "judgemental" is thrown about for anyone who dares to stand up for what they believe in or who has a view that others do not agree with. If distancing myself from someone who makes me feel uncomfortable is being "judgemental" then I am happy to be :)

    Her reason? She simply didn't want it.


    This is what I don't get. How can you just dismiss someone totally on the basis of one thing they do?

    Women who have abortions are not going around with horns, they are normal women, most of us know them but don't know we know them. Its awful to think all the things I have done in my life are worth nothing now in the eyes of some people on the basis of what I did on one day in my life.

    As for the woman you are describing maybe she regrets it, maybe she wishes she hadn't done it. Maybe she could do with some support.


  • #408
    LeeHoffmann
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭LeeHoffmann


    Her reason? She simply didn't want it.
    How do you know what her reason was? You said
    she didnt even know I knew
    Just confused. I assume somebody told you she had an abortion because she simply didn´t want the pregnancy/baby?


  • #409
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Millicent wrote: »
    But in all sincerity, is it not better that she didn't have the child rather than a child be born that knows it is resented and unwanted? Because in a lot of cases, the child would definitely know, whether the mother admitted it or not, because of how he/she was treated throughout their life.

    No.


  • #410
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    OldNotWIse: I was standing up for you man and you call me imflammatory and troll-like? I'm 25 years old, too old to come on boards.ie to put someone down. I'm merely expressing my feelings.

    Like i'm not calling anyone names or anything!


  • #411
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    Can't believe I made an effort to explain the fact that it was an example of a similar mindset as opposed to a direct comparison, and someone still started bleating about babies not being the same as sandwiches...sigh...

    I was respectful to you in my last post and am trying to engage you. I was trying to make the point that 40 weeks is a long time to carry a child you don't want or aren't intending to keep. It can be hell emotionally for women. There was no "bleating". There's no need to be rude.


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  • #412
    up for anything
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,790 ✭✭✭up for anything


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    Like just imagine your mum aborted you! Would that be fair?

    How can anyone imagine that? If they had been aborted they wouldn't know or care about it. Too silly. :D


  • #413
    Mickeroo
    Administrators, Computer Games Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 32,773 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Mickeroo


    OldNotWIse wrote: »

    Her reason? She simply didn't want it.

    In other words you don't know her full reasoning behind it.


  • #414
    cynder
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭cynder


    Millicent wrote: »
    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    That's a bit OTT. It's not like childless couples are going around impregnating unsuspecting women against their wishes. But if women want to be allowed to treat their unborn essentially, as something to be discarded, then does it not make sense for someone to argue, "well, hang on, if you dont want it can I have it?".

    I met a homeless guy a while ago who told me he had seen a well known cafe/snaack bar throwing out food at the end of the day (perfectly good sandwiches etc) and he asked if he could have one bc he was starving and they threw them in the bin in front of him.

    Cue onslaught of "gestating a baby is not like making a sandwich" but I'm just showing another (less extreme) example of the "I dont want it but I dont want anyone else to have it" mentality (actually I'm pretty sure I had an ex like that lol)

    A sandwich doesn't make 40 weeks to make. That period of time and the visible effects of pregnancy are a big factor in why adoption is not ideal for some women.

    The sandwich maker showed lack of kindness, compassion and empathy, with an attitude of your nothing to do with me do why should I help. Similar to the little girl who was run over in China and no one bothered to help.

    Just thinking if people showed more kindness, selflessness, consideration and compassion and emphasized more the world would be a better place.

    But thats never gonna happen. Worlds still gonna be full of evil, hateful, selfish, inconsiderate, ignorant, stubborn people.


  • #415
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    Millicent wrote: »
    I was respectful to you in my last post and am trying to engage you. I was trying to make the point that 40 weeks is a long time to carry a child you don't want or aren't intending to keep. It can be hell emotionally for women. There was no "bleating". There's no need to be rude.

    Ofcourse it is different but throwing food in the bin whilst a man is starving as absolutely reprehensible and possibly evil! Wouldn't you agree?


  • #416
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    No.

    Fair enough. I see you've decided you don't want to talk to me properly so there's probably no point in responding to you, is there?


  • #417
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    up for anything wrote: »
    How can anyone imagine that? If they had been aborted they wouldn't know or care about it. Too silly. :D

    I'm just trying to get her to understand the magnitude of abortion! All the stuff that happened in her life, all the happiness and all the pain. All those days and nights. That wouldn't have happened if she was aborted!


  • #418
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    OldNotWIse: I was standing up for you man and you call me imflammatory and troll-like? I'm 25 years old, too old to come on boards.ie to put someone down. I'm merely expressing my feelings.

    Like i'm not calling anyone names or anything!

    I think you need to relax. I agree with your values, I just think that your posts are a little over the top. I believe abortion is evil, but I really dont see the point in singling out someone on boards who has already had one and calling them evil? :confused: It's not going to achieve anything.


  • #419
    Millicent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    cynder wrote: »
    The sandwich maker showed lack of kindness, compassion and empathy, with an attitude of your nothing to do with me do why should I help. Similar to the little girl who was run over in China and no one bothered to help.

    Just thinking if people showed more kindness, selflessness, consideration and compassion and emphasized more the world would be a better place.

    But thats never gonna happen. Worlds still gonna be full of evil, hateful, selfish, inconsiderate, ignorant, stubborn people.

    You think it's kindness to be forced to carry a pregnancy for some benevolent aim of giving it away? I regularly give food to the homeless -- that's a world away from carrying a child to term and giving it away.
    Sponge25 wrote: »
    Ofcourse it is different but throwing food in the bin whilst a man is starving as absolutely reprehensible and possibly evil! Wouldn't you agree?

    Are you sure you're not trolling?


  • #420
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Sponge25 wrote: »
    Just don't do it again! I know I can't tell you what to do, but it's not fair and deep down you know that. You might have convinced yourself it is fair but if you really think hard you know it's not.

    Like just imagine your mum aborted you! Would that be fair?

    This is getting ridiculous now :rolleyes:

    Honestly I don't need anyone preaching to me, I don't know what the future holds.

    I didn't do anything wrong, I know I did the right thing for me, I thought long and hard about it and made sure of that.


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  • #421
    Sponge25
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 444 ✭✭Sponge25


    Millicent wrote: »
    Yep, unless the High Court decides otherwise. (Link)

    Seriously? Wouldn't it be alot better giving the child up for adoption than aborting it!? :(


This discussion has been closed.
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