Seroius question, one for the regular weed smokers. Sensible advice much appreciated!

Conbhar · 14-03-2012 11:54PM #1

Rite so the story goes that im sorta seeing a girl and shes lovely and nice and all that but she does not touch weed at all and dosent like the whole drugs thing and i dont really wana tell her that im fond of a j or four :P. Now id tend to smoke 5 - 7 nites a week and have done for the last 5 or so years and im not planing to give up any time soon. So my question is has anyone else had to come clean to potential girlfriends/boyfriends and what advice would you choose to pass on?

Yakult · 14-03-2012 11:57PM

Ask her if shes comfortable with it, if not then its unfair on both.

pbowenroe · 14-03-2012 11:57PM

weed brownies. don't tell her

Hande hoche! · 14-03-2012 11:57PM

Drop hints that you do coke/heroin. Then when she finds out you just smoke weed, it will seem mundane in comparison.

WoollyRedHat · 14-03-2012 11:59PM

Introduce her to the drug scene, set her up with your drug dealer, make her feel comfortable with it.

CreepingDeath · 14-03-2012 11:59PM

Right place to ask this question... the AH mods are regular users.

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:01AM

Yakult wrote: »

Ask her if shes comfortable with it, if not then its unfair on both.

Well she dosent like any sorta drug taking at all so thats that out!

Ghandee · 15-03-2012 12:02AM

Give them up, duuude.

Seriously.

WoollyRedHat · 15-03-2012 12:02AM

Conbhar wrote: »

Well she dosent like any sorta drug taking at all so thats that out!

Tell her to Light(en) up

Skylinehead · 15-03-2012 12:03AM

Can she not tell straight away? The stoneovers, that unremoveable smell from your clothes (:mad:), sneaking out for a spliff every night? :pac:

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:06AM

Skylinehead wrote: »

Can she not tell straight away? The stoneovers, that unremoveable smell from your clothes (:mad:), sneaking out for a spliff every night? :pac:

Wev only met at the weekends so far when iv been out for a few drinks and wat not and i tend not to get to baked when im drinkin so im afraid she would be none the wiser.

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:07AM

Ghandee wrote: »

Give them up, duuude.

Seriously.

No

token101 · 15-03-2012 12:08AM

Conbhar wrote: »

Rite so the story goes that im sorta seeing a girl and shes lovely and nice and all that but she does not touch weed at all and dosent like the whole drugs thing and i dont really wana tell her that im fond of a j or four :P. Now id tend to smoke 5 - 7 nites a week and have done for the last 5 or so years and im not planing to give up any time soon. So my question is has anyone else had to come clean to potential girlfriends/boyfriends and what advice would you choose to pass on?

Cut back/Quit. They're your only options. No point in lying. As the relationship goes on she's going to wonder why you are getting stupider.

44leto · 15-03-2012 12:08AM

You smoke to much dope, its not as safe as people believe it is, you are opening yourself up to all sorts of future mental problems.

She should ditch you if you are honest, so continue with holding the truth.

WoollyRedHat · 15-03-2012 12:08AM

Embrace Jesus?

starbelgrade · 15-03-2012 12:11AM

You're looking for sensible advice from regular weed smokers?

Best of luck with that.

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:14AM

44leto wrote: »

You smoke to much dope, its not as safe as people believe it is, you are opening yourself up to all sorts of future mental problems.

She should ditch you if you are honest, so continue with holding the truth.

Ah here dont really wana take this down the whole route of "drugs are bad" argument but iv been smoking on and of for 10 years and been smoking nearly every nite for the last 5 years and my mental health is in fine shape

Lumbo · 15-03-2012 12:16AM

Two choices. Her or weed. You decide.

benway · 15-03-2012 12:17AM

Conbhar wrote: »

id tend to smoke 5 - 7 nites a week and have done for the last 5 or so years and im not planing to give up any time soon.

Aren't you bored of it at this stage? I mean ... it's not all that exciting after a while - even the biggest stoners end up cutting back and eventually more or less quitting eventually. Or so I'm told. Maybe this is the time?

Granted, it might not be great for the relationship for you to be able to blame her for you not being able to smoke, but I'd seriously give it a go for a couple of weeks and see how you get on, even just cut back a bit.

Otherwise, you need to to let her know, you'll know best how to go about this.

General General · 15-03-2012 12:18AM

All answers, nonsense, so far are... two options, must you choose from: deceit... lie to her... my mate Paul managed to get away with getting married to three different women... on the same day! It may stress you out to live this double life... but the stories you will collect will make you a popular dinner guest for years to come... you may even get a book deal out of it.

Of course, the other option is: tell her outright, say that you want to give it up, but your addiction is so bad that the only chance you have of overcoming it is hardcore riding.

WoollyRedHat · 15-03-2012 12:18AM

Lumbo wrote: »

Two choices. Her or weed. You decide.

Lol I totally read that in the Big Brother voice.

jam_mac_jam · 15-03-2012 12:20AM

Just tell her, if she minds then clearly she is not for you. fine if she doesnt but really if she is going to give you hassle about the odd joint then you have your answer really. You really shouldnt lie though, that's going to make it a lot worse. If she isnt into drugs does she not drink?

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:26AM

benway wrote: »

Aren't you bored of it at this stage? I mean ... it's not all that exciting after a while - even the biggest stoners end up cutting back and eventually more or less quitting eventually. Or so I'm told. Maybe this is the time?

Granted, it might not be great for the relationship for you to be able to blame her for you not being able to smoke, but I'd seriously give it a go for a couple of weeks and see how you get on, even just cut back a bit.

Otherwise, you need to to let her know, you'll know best how to go about this.

Cant really see me giving up to be honest maybe cutting down one day a long way down the road. Wit me and the mates i hang out wit its more of a social thing like wed all go around to each others houses during the week and have a few smokes just like some people would have a few cans.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar · 15-03-2012 12:27AM

yeah but people who have a few cans will still probably hang out with each other if one or more of them stopped drinking

doesn't tend to happen with stoners. it's a very fickle "friendship"

jam_mac_jam · 15-03-2012 12:32AM

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar wrote: »

yeah but people who have a few cans will still probably hang out with each other if one or more of them stopped drinking

doesn't tend to happen with stoners. it's a very fickle "friendship"

no not really at all, some people like one or the other or both doesnt mean that your friendships are any shorter.

jased10s · 15-03-2012 12:33AM

44leto wrote: »

You smoke to much dope, its not as safe as people believe it is, you are opening yourself up to all sorts of future mental problems.

She should ditch you if you are honest, so continue with holding the truth.

FFS will you get a grip , Boards will make you more mental than weed.

To the OP , Be truthfull and if your a proper person then it shouldent matter. Just smoke outside as some people dont like the smell.

Maybe introduce her to it and get creative.

If she dont like it then she does not like the real you .

You are what you is.

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:34AM

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar wrote: »

yeah but people who have a few cans will still probably hang out with each other if one or more of them stopped drinking

doesn't tend to happen with stoners. it's a very fickle "friendship"

Not at all. In our group of 8 or 9 we have 4 who smoke weed and the rest dont, at all. Just because one of my mates who iv know for years dosent smoke thats not gona mean im gona stop hanging around wit him or her.

up for anything · 15-03-2012 12:35AM

jam_mac_jam wrote: »

Just tell her, if she minds then clearly she is not for you. fine if she doesnt but really if she is going to give you hassle about the odd joint then you have your answer really. You really shouldnt lie though, that's going to make it a lot worse. If she isnt into drugs does she not drink?

It's hardly the odd joint if he is smoking seven nights a week.

I'd imagine that you'll find it difficult to hold her interest if your principal occupation is getting wrecked with the lads every night.

benway · 15-03-2012 12:42AM

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar wrote: »

yeah but people who have a few cans will still probably hang out with each other if one or more of them stopped drinking

doesn't tend to happen with stoners. it's a very fickle "friendship"

Nah, don't think there's any difference. People might wonder about it when you pass, but they'll just go "more for me" when they think about it for a second and carry on. If you're able to keep up with the banter, or don't get bored if/when everybody gets couch-locked, you'll be grand.

If the girl has a phobia about it, but hasn't really been around stoners, she should be fine once she realises that you don't grow two heads and go all Trainspotting on her after a couple of tokes. It'll probably involve at least one night of "here, gimme some of that", "I'm not getting anything off this", then holding her hair while she pukes and being reassuring as she works through the whitey. At least, my stoner friends tell me this is what happens.

If she objects to it for any other reason, you'll have a problem.

Either way, best to tell her, she will find out and it'll be messy if she hasn't heard about it from you first.

Best of luck with it....

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:43AM

up for anything wrote: »

It's hardly the odd joint if he is smoking seven nights a week.

I'd imagine that you'll find it difficult to hold her interest if your principal occupation is getting wrecked with the lads every night.

Well if things go well my principal occupation will be wrecking HER every nite so no worries

Conbhar · 15-03-2012 12:46AM

benway wrote: »

Nah, don't think there's any difference. People might wonder about it when you pass, but they'll just go "more for me" when they think about it for a second and carry on. If you're able to keep up with the banter, or don't get bored if/when everybody gets couch-locked, you'll be grand.

If the girl has a phobia about it, but hasn't really been around stoners, she should be fine once she realises that you don't grow two heads and go all Trainspotting on her after a couple of tokes. It'll probably involve at least one night of "here, gimme some of that", "I'm not getting anything off this", then holding her hair while she pukes and being reassuring as she works through the whitey. At least, my stoner friends tell me this is what happens.

If she objects to it for any other reason, you'll have a problem.

Either way, best to tell her, she will find out and it'll be messy if she hasn't heard about it from you first.

Best of luck with it....

Pretty sound advice mate, cheers!

Seroius question, one for the regular weed smokers. Sensible advice much appreciated!

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