Father Ted

kfallon · 13-02-2012 12:48PM

"I'll stick this effin' pitchfork up your hole"

"Get your bollix out of my face"

One of my favourite Father Ted scenes! I don't think this will embed but here you go

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLTnacYvvg4

starlit · 13-02-2012 12:57PM

Till this day I still like all of the episodes of Fr Ted, can't just pick one but there was a good few good ones on recently on RTE2.

Seannew1 · 13-02-2012 01:06PM

Bloody Priests,bloody sanctimonious scumbags,made my life a bloody misery..................

Len Brennan · 13-02-2012 01:13PM

Love the little suttle jokes that are in it like the name of the songs and artists in a song for Europe. Like You Durty English B@stards by the Hairy Bowseys. Brilliant.

admiralofthefleet · 13-02-2012 01:14PM

hell is my favourite episode

Fluorescence · 13-02-2012 01:15PM

The one with the promiscuous milkman, and Dougal getting stuck driving the milkfloat around a roundabout for hours :pac:.
Mrs Doyle: "He said he's going to put his massive tool in me box, father"
Fr Ted: "WHAT?!"
Mrs Doyle: *hold up giant spanner and a large red tool box*

token56 · 13-02-2012 01:21PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnYoFmBagmk

"but dont they all have lovely bottoms"

dfx- · 13-02-2012 01:27PM

Entertaining Fr. Stone has grown to be my favourite.

over 75s football, the Holy Stone of Clonrichert, the sheep contest and the perfect square of dirt in the Chinese visitors episode would be notable mentions.

Duggy747 · 13-02-2012 01:34PM

*takes puff from fag*

*blows*

*smoke spells out "Lovely Fags"*

JerryHandbag · 13-02-2012 01:35PM

It has claws as big as cups, It has four ears, two for listening and two are sort of back-up ears. Some might be on the inside of its head, It has a retractable leg so it can leap up at you better. It has magnets on its tail, so if you're made out of metal, it can attach itself to you. It lights up at night. It has a tremendous fear of stamps. Its yawn sounds like Liam Neeson chasing a load of hens around inside a barrel. It has no mouth, but instead has four arses.
It only has eyebrows on Saturdays.

kojack · 13-02-2012 01:52PM

How's Father Jack? I haven't seen him since the last Sharon Stone season

Fr D Maugire · 13-02-2012 01:55PM

JerryHandbag wrote: »

It has claws as big as cups, It has four ears, two for listening and two are sort of back-up ears. Some might be on the inside of its head, It has a retractable leg so it can leap up at you better. It has magnets on its tail, so if you're made out of metal, it can attach itself to you. It lights up at night. It has a tremendous fear of stamps. Its yawn sounds like Liam Neeson chasing a load of hens around inside a barrel. It has no mouth, but instead has four arses.
It only has eyebrows on Saturdays.

Ah, the beast of Craggy Island.

Ted and Dougal watching the over 75s training for the big game admiring Fr.Jacks skills.

Fr.Dougal: "Ted, didnt you once tell me Fr.Jack had a trial with Liverpool?"

Fr.Ted: No Dougal, Fr.Jack was on trial in Liverpool"

kfallon · 13-02-2012 02:05PM

Lady 1: Oh, we saw a great one a few weeks ago, The Crying Game.
Lady 2: Oh it was brilliant
Lady 1: Oh there was this great bit in it there was this girl, and then you find out it's not a girl but a man
Lady 2: 'Cause he got his lad out

keano_afc · 13-02-2012 02:10PM

Fupp off, you grasshole.

ShadowHearth · 13-02-2012 02:11PM

I am foreigner, but I find father ted to be one of the most amazing comedies around!

When I first time sow it I was shocked and loughing like crazy! A comedy about priests?! After 7 years in Ireland I am still watching father ted, i understand it more and more with wach day/year because o learn more about irish "way of living".I have seen each episode atleast 5 times at this stage. It just does not age!

I guess my favourite one is with milkman pat!

" father! Pat wants to put his massive tool in to my box!"
"yes, I am afraid it's too big for the milk float"

I have to say I understood this phrase properly only few years ago

I guess my

robbie_998 · 13-02-2012 02:13PM

i got to visit teds house on saturday.

t'was grand.

kelle · 13-02-2012 02:18PM

Paully D wrote: »

I'd imagine it was very controversial at the time of its release though.

.

It was!
My religious neighbour expressed her sheer disgust at such a programme being aired. Mum and Dad were religious too, but they loved it! OMG, the complaints that were made, now there's much worse on the box!
My son aged 11 loves watching the re-runs on Channel 4 at present, any bad language in it is not as bad as what he hears when accompanying his Dad to GAA games!

Gophur · 13-02-2012 02:21PM

Fup you. Fup you and all belonging to you. You're only an auld fupping so-and-so.

For Fup sake!

billy87 · 13-02-2012 02:48PM

and now to ride mrs o'reilly.

Frank Spencer · 13-02-2012 02:56PM

Did you hear about the whistle being stolen?
I never thought I'd see the like.
What next? Somebody'll be murdered and then where are we?
Drive-by shootings in the night. It'll be like Boyz N the Hood.
Then they'll have whores selling their wares on the street.
The pimps'll be using crack to keep the whores under control.
I'm going to lock myself in the basement until they catch that fella.
Goodbye to ya Father.

Brendog · 13-02-2012 03:18PM

The soccor episode is good too.

"THESE ARE FAKE HANDS!!"

Riddle101 · 13-02-2012 03:58PM

Can't name any of my favorites because they're all simply classics. Never a dull episode, IMO.

If I had to name on episode off the top of my head. It would be the one with father Damo.

Purely for this scene.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hhWqkq2bc0

_feedback_ · 13-02-2012 04:06PM

John / Mary / Dougal: (Cinema Protest Episode)

John O'Leary: What can we do for you Father?
Dougal : I was looking for a pair of handcuffs actually.
John : A pair of handcuffs? What do you need them for?
Dougal : Oh nothing much, they're for me and Ted.
Mary : You and Father Ted?
Dougal : Yeah, we're just trying something out.
John : Well emm, actually, funnily enough we do have a pair. Sergeant Thornton left them here when he retired.
Dougal : Retired from what?
John : From the police.
Dougal : The police? Was Sergeant Thornton a policeman?
John : Emm, he was yes. Why do you think he wore the uniform?
Dougal : Oh I thought he was just having a laugh.
John : Anyway here's the handcuffs.
Dougal : Great, bye now.

Seans_Username · 13-02-2012 04:09PM

Riddle101 wrote: »

Can't name any of my favorites because they're all simply classics. Never a dull episode, IMO.

Couldn't agree more.

My favourites are the ones with Pat Shortt. He was just brilliant: " 'Tis my money Father, I just don't like fillin' out the forms"

One of my favourite lines from the whole thing is simply "Don't call me Len ya little bollix"