How would you feel if your child was gay?

ronan keane · 08-10-2011 12:53PM

I Wouldn't Care Its His Life Why Try change It?

4leto · 08-10-2011 12:54PM

Jackson Dirty Sound wrote: »

OP most people here are not rearing a family and looking forward to being a grand parent someday, and a lot will post up some liberal populist crap.. Me, I'll say it like it is - I'd be devastated.. Sure there are worst things which a child can be, and I do believe its not a life choice unless they started acting all camp & queer about the whole thing.

But at the end of the day we're family and I'm here to support my children throught thick and thin.

But yes, I'd be devasted.

How would a gay child feel to have you as a father, devastated I suspect, but he doesn't choose who his father is, so..........

Mike 1972 · 08-10-2011 12:54PM

humbert wrote: »

I would probably be a little worried if my son/daughter decided they were gay while in their teens.

People are incapable of making well balanced decisions at that age.

So tell us about the time you decided to be hetrosexual :rolleyes:

What age were you ?
How long did you think about it ?
What factors did you take into consideration before arriving at your decision ?
What was the biggest thing which finally swayed you ?
Any regreats or second thoughts ?

LeixlipRed · 08-10-2011 12:56PM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

So tell us about the time you decided to be hetrosexual :rolleyes:

What age were you ?
How long did you think about it ?
What factors did you take into consideration before arriving at your decision ?
What was the biggest thing which finally swayed you ?
Any regreats or second thoughts ?

I filled in the form at the post office. I got a free lollipop too, woo!

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 12:57PM

4leto wrote: »

How would a gay child feel to have you as a father, devastated I suspect, but he doesn't choose who his father is, so..........

Bull****, i have met Makikomi and have seen him interact with his family and his kids. I truly get the feeling the guy would part the sea for his children if he could.

Read what he said, he didn't say a thing about being devastated to have a gay child, he said he would be devastated at the idea of not having a grandchild.

From what i have seen and experienced the times i met Makikomi any child would be blessed to have him as a father.

Mike 1972 · 08-10-2011 01:10PM

sexter wrote: »

......The show features bestiality: a dog who is the "hot stud" of the town, "dating" a new, gorgeous blond girl in every episode. .......

Where the fup did you C&P that shyte from ?

What hopelessly misinformed drivel. That Dog gets less action than I do FFS

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 08-10-2011 01:13PM

Jackson Dirty Sound wrote: »

OP most people here are not rearing a family and looking forward to being a grand parent someday, and a lot will post up some liberal populist crap.. Me, I'll say it like it is - I'd be devastated.. Sure there are worst things which a child can be, and I do believe its not a life choice unless they started acting all camp & queer about the whole thing.

But at the end of the day we're family and I'm here to support my children throught thick and thin.

But yes, I'd be devasted.

Unless the only have one child, the grandkids thing is still not impossible. And even if they were the only kid, it's a bit selfish to demand somethign of someone who never asked to be in that position.

Are there other reasosn why you#d be devestated? Homophobia perhaps?

readyletsgo · 08-10-2011 01:14PM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

Where the fup did you C&P that shyte from ?

What hopelessly misinformed drivel. That Dog gets less action than I do FFS

This person hasn't a clue what they are on about if you read their entire post Mike, it make me :mad: then I just LOL'd and thought, WFT!!!!!

Biggins · 08-10-2011 01:19PM

I have a bother in law that is dying of cancer - a bother that is always having many fits daily in epilepsy and is also brain damaged. I have a daughter that has a non-curable spinal condition.

If any of my four children said they were gay - my only thoughts would be, are they ok, are they healthy and looking after themselves, have they got money in their pockets so they not go hungry?
Don't care if they are gay or not. If they live a long good healthy life with more smiles than tears, I'd tell them to carry on living their lives on their terms!

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 08-10-2011 01:22PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

Bull****, i have met Makikomi and have seen him interact with his family and his kids. I truly get the feeling the guy would part the sea for his children if he could.

Read what he said, he didn't say a thing about being devastated to have a gay child, he said he would be devastated at the idea of not having a grandchild.

From what i have seen and experienced the times i met Makikomi any child would be blessed to have him as a father.

No he didn't. He said some people want to be a grandparent. He may bever become a grandparetn for a wide variety of reasons, that's a totally different question.

Then he made some throw away remark about liberilst populism in order to make it sound like anythign tcontrary to his opinion badly thought out.

And then he quite clearly said that yes, he would be devestated.

billybudd · 08-10-2011 01:29PM

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

No he didn't. He said some people want to be a grandparent. He may bever become a grandparetn for a wide variety of reasons, that's a totally different question.

Then he made some throw away remark about liberilst populism in order to make it sound like anythign tcontrary to his opinion badly thought out.

And then he quite clearly said that yes, he would be devestated.

But a part of you would feel devestated, mainly because as a hetrosexual you will never be able to understand it, but if your a decent person you will accept it and still have the same unconditional love for your child.

I mean all this labeling going on in this thread is discrimination in another form, liberal, pc, not pc, right wing,,,blah blah blah, you ae born, you live and then you die, that is a certainty without label.

Sonics2k · 08-10-2011 01:29PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

Bull****, i have met Makikomi and have seen him interact with his family and his kids. I truly get the feeling the guy would part the sea for his children if he could.

Read what he said, he didn't say a thing about being devastated to have a gay child, he said he would be devastated at the idea of not having a grandchild.

From what i have seen and experienced the times i met Makikomi any child would be blessed to have him as a father.

You can still have Grandchildren if one of your kids is gay y'know.

In fact if anything, you're grandchildren will be planned and not the result of a drunken night and a broken condom.

4leto · 08-10-2011 01:31PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

Bull****, i have met Makikomi and have seen him interact with his family and his kids. I truly get the feeling the guy would part the sea for his children if he could.

Read what he said, he didn't say a thing about being devastated to have a gay child, he said he would be devastated at the idea of not having a grandchild.

From what i have seen and experienced the times i met Makikomi any child would be blessed to have him as a father.

But it is, any father with forward expectations with their children is setting A scene for disappointment, he wants grandchildren and don't we all, but it is not the way the world works for some.

Gay is not a lifestyle choice, it is either a genetic or a prenatal determined sexuality, you are born that way. Would you hate or be disappointed in a person who was Black, disabled, blind etc, off course you wouldn't because that would be imbecilic.

Gay is a very sizeable minority estimates range from 9 to 16% so it is likely he could have a child who is gay. So he and others should stop looking at it as a problem because it isn't.

In my family the gene mix can turn up dyslexia, not the common hard at reading type, but the complete one when they will never be able to read, use a computer, have a boards or a facebook account. But they just get on with their lives and we hope for the best.

What more could we expect or ask for. Fkuc grandchildren.

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 01:32PM

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

No he didn't. He said some people want to be a grandparent. He may bever become a grandparetn for a wide variety of reasons, that's a totally different question.

Then he made some throw away remark about liberilst populism in order to make it sound like anythign tcontrary to his opinion badly thought out.

And then he quite clearly said that yes, he would be devestated.

Like i said, read his post within the context of it's totality, don't dismiss the bits you want to dismiss and focus on the bits that make you feel better about your own opinion.

I know the guy and knowing him earns him the benefit of the doubt from me.

But you just go back to accusing people you don't know and have never met of whatever you please...that's more the AH way.

And he has a point on the populist crap...the majority of people in this thread are merely going with their assumption that something wouldn't bother them. Makikomi has had the balls to say that yes, something would bother him but his children are important enough to him for him to deal with it.

Micky Dolenz · 08-10-2011 01:37PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

Bull****, i have met Makikomi and have seen him interact with his family and his kids. I truly get the feeling the guy would part the sea for his children if he could.

Read what he said, he didn't say a thing about being devastated to have a gay child, he said he would be devastated at the idea of not having a grandchild.

From what i have seen and experienced the times i met Makikomi any child would be blessed to have him as a father.

Man crush?

I get the grandparent thing but I suspect by the time the majority of our children are adults , gay couples could well have their own families.

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 01:37PM

Sonics2k wrote: »

You can still have Grandchildren if one of your kids is gay y'know.

No way!!! Thanks for clearing that up.

4leto wrote: »

But it is, any father with forward expectations with their children is setting A scene for disappointment, he wants grandchildren and don't we all, but it is not the way the world works for some.

All parents have forward expectation for the kids.

Anyone who says otherwise is a liar. They want their kids to be happy, to be healthy, to be successful, to find love, to have friends and to experience life.

It's weird, you seem to have incredible difficulty getting your head around the concept that different people will have different reactions to things. I mean...the way the world works means all of us will die...so why do get sad when people we know and love die?

Why bother feeling happy or sad about anything...it's just the way the world works.

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Man crush?

I prefer the term bromance.

Sonics2k · 08-10-2011 01:39PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

No way!!! Thanks for clearing that up.

Your sarcasm isn't needed LF.

But my point stands, and mutes any concern about not having grandchildren because your child is gay. So it's not a reasonable excuse to be devastated if a child was gay.

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 01:44PM

Sonics2k wrote: »

Your sarcasm isn't needed LF.

But my point stands, and mutes any concern about not having grandchildren because your child is gay. So it's not a reasonable excuse to be devastated if a child was gay.

Human emotional reactions to anything are not reasonable...it's not a logical process...the simple fact is the guy expressed a fear and for some reason is being jumped on for it.

I'm just pointing out that maybe people who are looking solely at the post in one way are doing the guy a disservice. It's very easy to be cold and logical about something when you are removed from it, especially when you are simply backing up an argument you believe in.

My parents already have 4 grandchildren but still get a little sad when they think that i don't want to have kids. They can't explain why to me, they know it's not logical, it's just something they feel.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 08-10-2011 01:47PM

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

Like i said, read his post within the context of it's totality, don't dismiss the bits you want to dismiss and focus on the bits that make you feel better about your own opinion.

I know the guy and knowing him earns him the benefit of the doubt from me.

But you just go back to accusing people you don't know and have never met of whatever you please...that's more the AH way.

And he has a point on the populist crap...the majority of people in this thread are merely going with their assumption that something wouldn't bother them. Makikomi has had the balls to say that yes, something would bother him but his children are important enough to him for him to deal with it.

I read the post in it's entirety. If we only commented on posters we'd met this would be a very quiet forum. Either he would be devasted that his child would be gay or his post was not very well written.

And no, he does NOT have a point with the "pluralist crap". For one thing, he doesn't even define what he means by the phrase, for another thing he labeled it "liberal" plurlaist crap, as if a political leaning was some kind of nsensitivity, and finally how does he know how other people are going to react in another situation? I know lots of parents who have gay kids and haev had absolutely no problem with it. It does actually happen, you know.

Blatter · 08-10-2011 01:49PM

I would wager that the amount of 'I'd have absolutely no problem with my child being gay' views in this thread is not a reflection for the majority of people in real life.

It's easy for people to sit on front of their computers and say they wouldn't care less, but it would become a different ball game for most, if it actually happened to them.

Not all, there are of course some that would genuinely have no problem if their child was gay. But those people are definitely overrepresented in this thread imo.

A few people have had the balls to share how they'd truly feel(devastated, and I would be too) and I'm sure many people feel the same way, but alot are taking the safer option by either not posting at all and just staying out of it. And before someone says 'it's only the Internet', there are many that value their reputation on here and may think it could negatively affect it.

Mike 1972 · 08-10-2011 01:50PM

readyletsgo wrote: »

This person hasn't a clue what they are on about if you read their entire post Mike

Sad to say I did.

I just picked out the bit that least self-evidently horseshyte.

hondasam wrote: »

All gay people have a gay parent

So if a gay bloke has a kid by a lesbian mum theres no way that kid can turn out to be straight (or even bi) right ?

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 01:51PM

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

I read the post in it's entirety. If we only commented on posters we'd met this would be a very quiet forum. Either he would be devasted that his child would be gay or his post was not very well written.

And no, he does NOT have a point with the "pluralist crap". For one thing, he doesn't even define what he means by the phrase, for another thing he labeled it "liberal" plurlaist crap, as if a political leaning was some kind of nsensitivity, and finally how does he know how other people are going to react in another situation? I know lots of parents who have gay kids and haev had absolutely no problem with it. It does actually happen, you know.

He said populist crap, not pluralist crap...so perhaps you didn't read the post as carefully as you think you did.

Look, i am not gonna argue the dudes points for him, I am merely giving my opinion to the people taking shots at him about the kind of father he is or trying to imply he's homophobic. None of it adds up to my experience of the guy.

With regard to the bit i put in bold, where did i say it didn't? I strongly suggest you stick to arguing the points that people are making...otherwise you just look like a twat...and that's not a column i would normally put you in.

mal1 · 08-10-2011 01:52PM

Sonics2k wrote: »

Hate to tell you this, kids will get bullied for everything.

From being Ginger, fat, skinny, short, pale, black, white, asian, a loner, a weirdo, a goth and so on.

Bullying is part of being a child.

Being a loving parent is about your child, and not their god damn sexuality which has no real impact on their personality.

I'm sure the OP is aware of all you have said and i don't know if they mentioned anything about their love for them. My mother used to say the same in regards that she wouldn't mind if i were gay but would feel sorry for me as a child/teenager since it's hard enough getting bullied about being ginger or fat or skinny but to have another issue to deal with would be tough. Although there may be a good character building side to it all.

I just remember some of the lads at school getting tortured for 10 years solid. Heartbreaking when i look back on it and these memories would come to mind if my child were to say that he/she were gay.

I agree with a lot of what the OP is trying to say but not really the point about grandchildren, that's selfish but probably the OP is just being honest. I'm too young to think about grandchildren so i can't relate.

Abi · 08-10-2011 01:55PM

Millicent wrote: »

What, so I have to have crotch fruit to know whether or not I have any opposition to gay people?

Who made this about gay people? The thread is about having a gay son or daughter, which for some, their attitude would be different.

4leto · 08-10-2011 01:55PM

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Man crush?

I get the grandparent thing but I suspect by the time the majority of our children are adults , gay couples could well have their own families.

I already know gay people who have children, its a different dynamic but it works just as well.

I wouldn't mind my child being gay but I draw the line on ginger, I would be devastated. (that of course is a joke)

Jaxxy · 08-10-2011 01:55PM

I really don't understand why the term "devastated" is being thrown about so readily here. Surely being devastated that your child is gay is a complete over-exaggeration in this day and age?

Being devastated that you might not get to have grandchildren? IMO, that's a completely selfish reaction. There are much more relevant, important issues to be devastated over IMO.

humbert · 08-10-2011 01:58PM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

So tell us about the time you decided to be hetrosexual :rolleyes:

What age were you ?
How long did you think about it ?
What factors did you take into consideration before arriving at your decision ?
What was the biggest thing which finally swayed you ?
Any regreats or second thoughts ?

Now now, don't get your knickers in a twist. As a teenager if you were to find yourself daydreaming about man on man action you might be gay, you might be bisexual or you might just be regretting watching Sex in the City when "there was nothing else on".

At some point you have to decide, "I am gay", this isn't a fad and I'm not bisexual. Then you have to tell the people close to you. That isn't easy and I'm sure it would be very difficult to take back later if you start finding the girl next door cute.

Mike 1972 · 08-10-2011 02:08PM

humbert wrote: »

As a teenager if you were to find yourself daydreaming about man on man action you might be gay, you might be bisexual or you might just be regretting watching Sex in the City when "there was nothing else on"..

Are we speaking from experience here and if so is there something you want to tell us ?

Lots of people grow up thinking theyre gay (or straight) and later (sometimes much later) in life suddenly realise theyre actually bi.

It usually isint a big deal.

MagicSean · 08-10-2011 02:15PM

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Man crush?

I get the grandparent thing but I suspect by the time the majority of our children are adults , gay couples could well have their own families.

That's no good if you're relying on them for a kidney in the future.

Logical Fallacy · 08-10-2011 02:16PM

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

There are much more relevant, important issues to be devastated over IMO.

*sigh*

And the "everyone agree with me or **** off" train just keeps on rolling.

I love AH, it's basically an opinion by popular consensus...anyone else is WRONG.

How would you feel if your child was gay?

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