Women who like a man who has "financial security"

Helgele · 05-10-2011 01:46PM

There's nothing new in financial security being important for women, pretty elementary, even more so in recession. Financial difficulties strain even good relationships, so why would I want to start a relationship with a man on the dole and/ or in crippling negative equity?
Food for thought: if it takes 100k to raise a child then 200k negative equity means losing funds for 2 kids to the bank.
This property gambling era have and will limit many families to come.
I find it amazing that it was only few years ago when owning a property was widely bragged about and considered big bonus on the meat market. Few years forward and one is left with the white elephant...

wes · 05-10-2011 01:48PM

Seems like common sense imho. You can't ignore finance in a relationship, especially if a couple intend to get married.

Seachmall · 05-10-2011 01:49PM

If they mean it in the literal sense, i.e. that the man isn't in any serious debt or has any serious financial leaks then I don't think anyone would argue.

But it's pretty much accepted as a euphemism for "wealthy".

RichieC · 05-10-2011 02:04PM

Sisko wrote: »

My attraction to women has nothing to do with how 'successful' they are

I seriously doubt any of the guys I know would turn as a good looking girl passes by and think "hmmm , I wonder how successful she is"...

Yes but we humans evolved with the males being the hunter and protector. men look for different things.

Chin up though, lads... if you have a roof over your head and some spare change in your pocket you're among the richest people in the world

skregs · 05-10-2011 02:50PM

doovdela wrote: »

There is surely a difference between someone wanting financial security and who is a gold digger like?

Then secure your own finances love, and don't go looking to sponge off a man.

smash · 05-10-2011 02:55PM

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I would like to be treated to a cinema trip now and again or to a restaurant(not flashy ones)/nice take away. In return I would wash the clothes, mind the kids, keep the house clean

Would you not just work so you can pay for a cinema trip or a restaurant/nice take away every now and then?

I could never be with someone who didn't have career objectives or wanted to be a stay at home mom.

Seachmall · 05-10-2011 03:03PM

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I would like to be treated to a cinema trip now and again or to a restaurant(not flashy ones)/nice take away. In return I would wash the clothes, mind the kids, keep the house clean, and I am one hell of a cook/baker!!!! Seems fair to me tbh!

Men are fully capable of doing these things themselves if they want them done. If they don't care you can't do them and then expect a treat in return (for doing something only you care about doing).

It's a relationship, not a trade of services.

wolfpawnat · 05-10-2011 03:12PM

smash wrote: »

Would you not just work so you can pay for a cinema trip or a restaurant/nice take away every now and then?

I could never be with someone who didn't have career objectives or wanted to be a stay at home mom.

Seachmall wrote: »

Men are fully capable of doing these things themselves if they want them done. If they don't care you can't do them and then expect a treat in return (for doing something only you care about doing).

It's a relationship, not a trade of services.

I clearly am using some humour, after all this is AH:D I am very much my own person and do not depend on men to pay for things for me and I always go Dutch!!!!

VenusPlays · 05-10-2011 03:19PM

Who are these women for whom a mans financial security is the only criteria for dating him? Do they really exist? And are there men who have apparently got the intelligence to ensure their financial security but are so witless that some golddigger can get the better of them without them having the slightest hint of it?

I see no problem in having financial security as part of a 'wishlist', the same way I'd want him to have all his own hair and teeth or not live with his mother. But I'd never reject a guy outright because he didn't tick all the boxes.

wolf moon · 05-10-2011 03:27PM

skregs wrote: »

Then secure your own finances love, and don't go looking to sponge off a man.

Brilliant post.

CathyMoran · 05-10-2011 03:31PM

You do not know what the future may bring so looking for a man who is financially secure is shortsighted at best. Looking for someone who shares your interests and views and is kind and intelligent is the best bet.

julyjane · 05-10-2011 03:36PM

An old woman said to me yesterday "it's better to be a poor man's darling than a rich man's slave"

Although personally I think being a rich man's darling would be a nice position to be in, she had a point!

wolfpawnat · 05-10-2011 03:42PM

julyjane wrote: »

An old woman said to me yesterday "it's better to be a poor man's darling than a rich man's slave"

Although personally I think being a rich man's darling would be a nice position to be in, she had a point!

I rather be poor and happy with a plain looking man who loved me, than rich and unhappy with a handsome man who couldn't give a damn, because looks fade, money gets spent and at the end of it all, we could only have each other!

smash · 05-10-2011 03:46PM

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I rather be poor and happy with a plain looking man who loved me, than rich and unhappy with a handsome man who couldn't give a damn, because looks fade, money gets spent and at the end of it all, we could only have each other!

Well if he couldn't give a damn, he'd probably dump you so you'd be alone!

Eve_Dublin · 05-10-2011 03:54PM

Lol at all the people voting "yes". I don't know one woman whose not supporting herself in these modern times. I just don't want to date a sponge.

wolfpawnat · 05-10-2011 05:29PM

smash wrote: »

Well if he couldn't give a damn, he'd probably dump you so you'd be alone!

Many a marriage where this is the case, even these days of divorce and affairs!!

Eric Cartman · 05-10-2011 06:05PM

I dont think Id ever even go out with a woman who couldnt fully support herself , The idea of even having a joint account or anything more than a temporary lend of less than 100 euro to see you to the end of the month is too far. As far as im concerned , if im paying the mortgage shed be paying rent , buy and run her own car , buy food for the house, pay half all the bills , etc...

rebel10 · 05-10-2011 06:26PM

newmug wrote: »

+1. And Rebel10, you're a girl?????:eek:.

Well last time I checked!:p

tan11ie · 05-10-2011 07:06PM

Some women seek rich men and some men seek sexy gold diggers.If that's what floats their boats then so be it!

Personally i can't understand women that depend on men financially .....digging their own graves IMO.

Oranage2 · 05-10-2011 07:14PM

I dont like to generalise but all women are sluts -

Like when was the last time you've seen a super model going out with a guy thats 43 leaves with his mam and has no job?

Point proven.

Oranage2 · 05-10-2011 07:15PM

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Lol at all the people voting "yes". I don't know one woman whose not supporting herself in these modern times. I just don't want to date a sponge.

I think thats the ratio of men to women on the internet.

hatrickpatrick · 05-10-2011 07:15PM

The reason guys resent this is because it implies you don't care about the person himself, only the lifestyle that comes with him.

I would have thought this was rather obvious? O_o

In other words, I don't want someone to go out with me because she wants to be secure, I want someone to go out with me because she actually fancies me. The idea of being with someone who's just pretending to like me when in fact she just wants security is rather depressing.

rebel10 · 05-10-2011 07:16PM

Oranage2 wrote: »

I dont like to generalise but all women are sluts -

Like when was the last time you've seen a super model going out with a guy thats 43 leaves with his mam and has no job?

Point proven.

Possibly because he has left with his mam!;)
Anyway, what is the point in discussing the point you are trying to make? Tell me, what makes her a "slut" cause she isn't going out with a fetch like this?

tan11ie · 05-10-2011 07:18PM

Oranage2 wrote: »

I dont like to generalise but all women are sluts -

Like when was the last time you've seen a super model going out with a guy thats 43 leaves with his mam and has no job?

Point proven.

Eh and why would she go out with a waster

Surely she would be more compatible with a guy who has ambition.

rebel10 · 05-10-2011 07:23PM

tan11ie wrote: »

Eh and why would she go out with a waster Surely she would be more compatible with a guy who has ambition.

Ah now, as much as I can dispute the fact that he is generalising and calling women sluts, you cannot, in this day and age just decide that someone who is jobless and living at home is lacking ambition and call them a waster.

Seachmall · 05-10-2011 07:25PM

rebel10 wrote: »

Well last time I checked!:p

If you need a second opinion shoot me a PM, you can never be too sure with these things.

/perv

tan11ie · 05-10-2011 07:28PM

rebel10 wrote: »

Ah now, as much as I can dispute the fact that he is generalising and calling women sluts, you cannot, in this day and age just decide that someone who is jobless and living at home is lacking ambition and call them a waster.

No your right i agree, let me rephrase that..... an unfortunate 43 year old.

rebel10 · 05-10-2011 07:29PM

Seachmall wrote: »

If you need a second opinion shoot me a PM, you can never be too sure with these things.

/perv

No, not to worry, just did a recheck, thanks for the concern though.;)

Agricola · 05-10-2011 07:30PM

Men discriminate against prospective partners by generally seeking out good looking women who look like they can provide them with a healthy heir and that have an set of ample bosoms to feed him with!

Women discriminate against prospective partners by generally seeking out successful men who can provide for them and their kids long into the future.

We can paint it anyway we like and decry it because its supposedly an idea that belongs in prehistory, but it is the truth, plain and simple. Its in our genes.

Oranage2 · 05-10-2011 07:36PM

Agricola wrote: »

Men discriminate against prospective partners by generally seeking out good looking women who look like they can provide them with a healthy heir and that have an set of ample bosoms to feed him with!

Women discriminate against prospective partners by generally seeking out successful men who can provide for them and their kids long into the future.

We can paint it anyway we like and decry it because its supposedly an idea that belongs in prehistory, but it is the truth, plain and simple. Its in our genes.

All jokin aside have to agree with this -

Even think back to cave men time - Women didnt want Kevin the scrub that lived at home and cant hunt and left eating rats

They wanted Brad the hansome hunter who could slaughter 20 pigs in one fou swoop of his bow and arrow.

Also Brad knew he could have his pick of the ladies so he also picked the most succeful or pretty one.

Now forward 50 years later .....

Men want successful pretty women - and women want succesful pretty men or atleast the most sucesful pretty person they can find.

Women who like a man who has "financial security"

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