Dragon's Den - After Hours Edition.

AlmightyCushion · 23-09-2011 02:01PM

A new range of flavoured condoms. The flavours would be salt and vinegar, smokey bacon, cheese and onion etc. We could set up a joint venture with tayto.

silvershark · 23-09-2011 02:08PM

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

A new range of flavoured condoms. The flavours would be salt and vinegar, smokey bacon, cheese and onion etc. We could set up a joint venture with tayto.

Can I incorporate that with my invention in Post 30?

Could be then also used as some sort of self-defence spray that women could carry around in their handbag and use on potential attackers. So it would be a multi-functional love/hate product

FetchTheGin · 23-09-2011 02:12PM

2nd hand toilet roll.

Not only is it viable, it's recession proof.

6,000,000,000 for 0.1% of the business and you can join me in earning cents.

minidazzler · 23-09-2011 02:16PM

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

A super fun happy slide that is fitted to the side of skyscrapers and other tall buildings which lets you exit the building quickly and is much more fun than an elevator.

A kettle with wifi built in so you can boil it remotely from anywhere you have an internet connection. Actually just stick wifi in everything, wifi is great.

We'll have to wait for IPV6 for that to be doable really. Otherwise you will have to buy a sh1t tonne of IP addresses, unless you set it up in your home network and allow it to be accessible from outside the home. That would be pretty cool but it would totally be hacked and ****ed with.

Handy11 · 23-09-2011 02:21PM

HyperHelper

A small injection that, when administered, makes the person hyperglycemic for the day, allowing them to eat like hoores as much as they want. Perfect for those buffets or barbeques that you want to try everything.

Why not try it twice!!!

Hyperhelper.

AlmightyCushion · 23-09-2011 02:26PM

A coin counter that you stick down the back of the couch. Whenever money falls down the back of your couch, this will collect and organise it and then sound an alarm once it has collected more than ten euro.

FetchTheGin · 23-09-2011 02:32PM

Lottery Predictor- Self explanatory really.

AlmightyCushion · 23-09-2011 02:39PM

minidazzler wrote: »

We'll have to wait for IPV6 for that to be doable really. Otherwise you will have to buy a sh1t tonne of IP addresses, unless you set it up in your home network and allow it to be accessible from outside the home. That would be pretty cool but it would totally be hacked and ****ed with.

I was thinking of setting up a dyndns style service and have the kettle automatically update it whenever you ip address changes. That way you just got mykettle.kettle.com (or whatever your unique url is) and it would take you to your kettle providing you have opened the necessary port.

silvershark · 23-09-2011 02:47PM

Cake shield

http://youtu.be/IIgdGTg5mSw

Turnover Year 1?
Apple...

billybudd · 23-09-2011 02:57PM

a special mirror that in the morning makes you look great and tells you that you are:

Handsome/beautiful

successful/going to be

great personality

will have any man/woman you want

and that in 5 yrs you will be mortgage free.

it will of course smirk when you leave.

Lando Griffin · 23-09-2011 03:08PM

billybudd wrote: »

a special mirror that in the morning makes you look great and tells you that you are:

Handsome/beautiful

successful/going to be

great personality

will have any man/woman you want

and that in 5 yrs you will be mortgage free.

it will of course smirk when you leave.

You could have 2 versions one for the private sector and the other for public sector.
The private sector will be brutally honest while the public one would have you living in a surreal world full of extra little add ons of niceness.

Duggy747 · 23-09-2011 03:21PM

An X-Ray machine built into a washing machine that alarms you if you've left anything in your pockets.

Why waste money on temporary tans when you can have real tanned skin? My company will provide actual human skin from deceased people of all colours that your can stick on yourself like a pair of long johns. :pac:

Perfumed scented smokes so others can have nice whiff of nature / chocolate / vagina as you puff.

Toilet extractor - Extracts any undigested food from your poo and puts it in a bowl, ready to be used again. More food, less expense!!

I ask for €150,000 for 22.38654% share of my company.

pablomakaveli · 23-09-2011 03:23PM

A new kind of pest remover.

"Tired of people who uses phrases like bored.com or tired.com. then this product is for you"

A simple microphone is connected to a laser cannon that automatically targets and vaporizes anyone that the microphone hears uttering these phrases.

Only €29.95 when you call 1500-HERP-DERP.

Warning: Product may not be suitable for anyone who works with computers or pregnant women.

Raiser · 23-09-2011 03:31PM

Coloured, scented 100% roughage marketed to the last in cereal type boxes - Basically you eat a couple of servings daily and from then onwards all your poos are transferred from foul, bobbing king size snickers to something beautiful in purple or whatever colour suits that smells like lavender or vanilla etc.

Poos you can be proud of - Flushing optional, why not leave it there for others to enjoy? Companies could provide it in corporate colours to motivate workers and so on. Advertising Houses could have miniature logos, branding - The options are endless.

- Update your Facebook page with your midday 2 pounder in magenta with glitter and cascades of stars.

Orando Broom · 23-09-2011 03:32PM

* Robs the good ideas thanks to help from venture capitalist Uncle.

MungBean · 23-09-2011 03:32PM

Whats the biggest problem facing men today ? Thats right itchy arse syndrome. What to do ? Do you scratch it and get a stinky finger ? Or scrape at it with toilet paper in the hope that you hit the spot. Maybe even try poke a bit of something up in there in a vain attempt to ease your discomfort.

Well dont worry, you dont have to live in a world of misery, itchiness and smelly fingers.

Gentlemen I give you the ArsePal !! *round of applause*
Its a unique glove made specifically for scratching your sphincter.

Whenever you get the itch you stick this on scratch away to your hearts content safe in the knowledge that your fingers wont be touching bits of poo. Not near a bathroom ? No need to panic the handy thing (hahah stop it your killin me) is that its completely discrete and just looks like an ordinary glove, so wherever you are you can jam your hand in your pants stick your finger right in there for a scratch and when your done just stick it in your pocket.

Dont have a pocket ? Well then its game over. Really ? Of course not !!, the amazing thing about the ArsePal is that its dual purpose and can actually be used as a normal glove. Simply remove the glove and turn it inside out then pop it back on and go about your day free of the tyranny that is the itchy arse.

I am looking for 500k for 10% of the company. 10k of that will go into manufacture, 10k into research to expand into the left hand market and the rest will go into marketing/wages.

Thank you for your time. Any questions ?

billybudd · 23-09-2011 03:34PM

Skunkle wrote: »

Whats the biggest problem facing men today ? Thats right itchy arse syndrome. What to do ? Do you scratch it and get a stinky finger ? Or scrape at it with toilet paper in the hope that you hit the spot. Maybe even try poke a bit of something up in there in a vain attempt to ease your discomfort.

Well dont worry, you dont have to live in a world of misery, itchiness and smelly fingers.

Gentlemen I give you the ArsePal !! *round of applause*
Its a unique glove made specifically for scratching your sphincter.

Whenever you get the itch you stick this on scratch away to your hearts content safe in the knowledge that your fingers wont be touching bits of poo. Not near a bathroom ? No need to panic the handy thing (hahah stop it your killin me) is that its completely discrete and just looks like an ordinary glove, so wherever you are you can jam your hand in your pants stick your finger right in there for a scratch and when your done just stick it in your pocket.

Dont have a pocket ? Well then its game over. Really ? Of course not !!, the amazing thing about the ArsePal is that its dual purpose and can actually be used as a normal glove. Simply remove the glove and turn it inside out then pop it back on and go about your day free of the tyranny that is the itchy arse.

I am looking for 500k for 10% of the company. 10k of that will go into manufacture, 10k into research to expand into the left hand market and the rest will go into marketing/wages.

Thank you for your time. Any questions ?

Or you could just wipe your hole properly. zero capital:rolleyes:

MungBean · 23-09-2011 03:38PM

billybudd wrote: »

Or you could just wipe your hole properly. zero capital:rolleyes:

Thank you for your input sir. Unfortunately itchy arse syndrome isnt just caused by lack of wiping although it can be a factor. It can be caused by a variety of factors and is almost impossible to eradicate. There is no other product on the market today that is designed to combat this issue.

Also I forgot to mention in my initial pitch that it does come in two different colours.

billybudd · 23-09-2011 03:41PM

Thank you for your prompt response, it is noted.

with a clean arse free from fecal matter surely scratching it would be like scratching your arm.

mehfesto · 23-09-2011 03:44PM

*Heavy Scottish accent*

I'm oot. So why dooon't youuh Arse your Pal righ' oot that door!

FetchTheGin · 23-09-2011 03:49PM

RoboDad- For all the single mums out there, this Dad can fill the fatherly void in your little tykes life.

With such gems as, "not until you've finished your homework", "I am very disappointed in you" and "ask your mother". This robot is a delight for all the family.

Optional extras include, String vest alcodad, in the closet dad and dad that trys to fit in with the young people.

Mr Benevolent · 23-09-2011 03:55PM

Raiser wrote: »

Basically you pitch your business idea as you would on the TV show and People can then analyse it and decide whether or not to invest based on its genius merits or unfortunate flaws - simples.

I'll get the ball rolling.......

Steriandle - An extra handle fitted on Toilet Doors for use only by People who have washed their hands!

[/I][/SIZE]

Urine is sterile anyway. What's the problem? We all work at manky keyboards every day without a murmur.

MungBean · 23-09-2011 03:59PM

billybudd wrote: »

Thank you for your prompt response, it is noted.

with a clean arse free from fecal matter surely scratching it would be like scratching your arm.

Immediately after a shower yes but in today's busy world people just dont have the time to shower after each visit to the toilet, so although the arse may appear clean to the naked eye the distinct odour of the arse is a constant problem, one which I believe I have solved with this exciting new product.

Perhaps a demonstration is in order ? You can smell the finger before and after using the product and then determine the usefulness of said product ?

MungBean · 23-09-2011 04:04PM

FetchTheGin wrote: »

RoboDad- For all the single mums out there, this Dad can fill the fatherly void in your little tykes life.

With such gems as, "not until you've finished your homework", "I am very disappointed in you" and "ask your mother". This robot is a delight for all the family.

Optional extras include, String vest alcodad, in the closet dad and dad that trys to fit in with the young people.

Will there be an option to upgrade to the racist grandfather once the usefulness of the Dad features becomes dated ?

St.Spodo · 23-09-2011 04:05PM

Battery-powered torches are a thing of the past. Now we have, wait for it, a solar-powered torch. I can't believe no-one has thought of it.

Boardnashea · 23-09-2011 04:07PM

Skunkle wrote: »

Also I forgot to mention in my initial pitch that it does come in two different colours.

I'm thinking - scented and non-fragranced - Latex and non-latex varieties..

Why not rough and smooth or rough'n'smooth 2 in 1!

FetchTheGin · 23-09-2011 04:09PM

Skunkle wrote: »

Will there be an option to upgrade to the racist grandfather once the usefulness of the Dad features becomes dated ?

With your investment, going forward, in the current climate, what it is,with my projections, going forward, going forward, going forward, I think yes.

TheBunk1 · 23-09-2011 04:15PM

Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTzByQTeyJQ

MitchKoobski · 23-09-2011 04:18PM

The Netfist. We don't quite have the technology yet but it is coming.

The Netfist is a glove you wear while browsing the web, and can be worn on either hand. In the event of a completely ignorant person or bigot on the internet, who will not accept defeat, you can use the Netfist to punch someone in the face across the internet.

Once you are either chatting via IM or Webcam, or even browing the same page, take aim at your screen with the glove and punch it as hard as you can. The Netfist will appear at the other end and punch the sonofabiatch in the face.

*MitchKoobsk industries accepts no responsibility for damage to monitors, laptops, hands or punching the wrong person by mistake.*

MungBean · 23-09-2011 04:19PM

Boardnashea wrote: »

I'm thinking - scented and non-fragranced - Latex and non-latex varieties..

Why not rough and smooth or rough'n'smooth 2 in 1!

I like your initiative sir, with the proper backing theres no limit to what we can do with this product. Ideally I'd also like to have them in every vending machine beside the lion bars. People might be self conscious buying them in a shop but not as much when discretely getting a pack along with their lion bar or can of fanta.

Dragon's Den - After Hours Edition.

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