What's the number 1 thing you've learned from fillums?

Gracelessly Tom · 10-08-2011 05:44PM

mobile phones never work when being chased by a lunatic/monster/killer.

dsmythy · 10-08-2011 05:49PM

Be careful on the road. Motorists drive notoriously fast and as a result are unable to react to unexpected events without having to skid and slide.

bnt · 10-08-2011 05:50PM

Oscar the grouch wrote: »

Menstruation is an unknown phenomenon in movies. Female movie characters are all immune from it.

Well, there is one exception, I suppose: Cher (Alicia Silverstone) in Clueless: "I was surfing the crimson wave, had to haul ass to the Ladies!"

People wearing specs are only doing so to be difficult. They have no trouble ditching them when the going gets tough, or when romance is in the air, and they can see just fine without them.

PS: It's not contact lenses: they're never mentioned in movies unless they fall out in a comedic way. It takes time to get the prescription right and get used to them - they're not an instant replacement for specs.

mackg · 10-08-2011 05:53PM

Biggins wrote: »

* Brazil consists of one town mainly with a ruddy big statue on a hill. Everywhere else is jungle!

* Ancient Romans can always tell the time accurately even though you NEVER see any ancient time devices anywhere!

* It never rains when the main star steps up to the green to score with a winning baseball pitch or when a golf player is shooting on the eighteen green for a win!

* There will ALWAYS be someone out there that can solve your problem in one day that others have been working on for years.
(Stargate for example!)

* Autistic people are stupid and can't see through people but always allow themselves to be exposited for others gain!

:mad:

* Sufferers of epilepsy always must be stupid and of low slow comprehension/mental ability to pick up and learn things!

:mad:

* The Japanese guy is always more stupid and will always bow with every meet-up.

* Its mostly always the young boy that takes the girl to bed.

* The ugly dressed girl will always be the one that is the slapper and/or is the most one that score in the end with the men!

* Lesbians will always at some stage, shave their heads and act butch some time in their life.

* The spaceships will always be spotless but you will never see anyone actually doing any cleaning!
...They don't need laundries either besides having no toilets!

I'm living proof;)

Oscar the grouch · 10-08-2011 05:56PM

Shots fired at windshields never deflect; they always penetrate and hit the bad guy in the forehead. If the good guy is driving, he'll simply have to duck a little to avoid them.

Oscar the grouch · 10-08-2011 06:03PM

When a plane is low on fuel, the hero usually taps the gas guage as if that will help

Busi_Girl08 · 10-08-2011 06:18PM

Harrison Ford wants his family back!

A quick run and snog in the rain is enough to repair any relationship.

No matter how fast and frantically you run from the murderer, you with fall and hurt your leg and he will ****ing get you.

mikemac · 10-08-2011 06:19PM

American prisons are terrible places and a fair chance a gang will rape you when you arrive
So you need to hit or kill someone to show you are not to be messed with
Actually, that one may be true

Irish people talk like leprechauns.
I can understand Tom Cruise but Gerard Butler, a Scotsman??? Inexcusable

Proper order

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJJmoYp_2tw

Oscar the grouch · 10-08-2011 07:17PM

If a person knocks another out and takes their uniform, it will fit perfectly, irrespective of the relative size, sex or even species...

Busi_Girl08 · 10-08-2011 07:43PM

If someone receives a blow to the head and is knocked unconscious for any time from a few seconds to several hours (enough time to be loaded into a van, taken to a secret lair and tied up) they will recover completely upon awakening.

Also, in most cases it will just take a bucket of water or a slap across the face to wake them up.

When a character is in hospital and has to get out fast, they can very easily tear out their IV from their arm, with little to no bleeding.

johnmcdnl · 10-08-2011 09:00PM

when the "ugly shy" girl takes her glasses off and takes the bobbin out of her hair and puts a nice dress on she turns into a ride :eek:

paddyandy · 10-08-2011 09:52PM

" Your honour it was'nt suppose to happen like that, that's not how it was in the movie "

Tubsandtiles · 10-08-2011 10:03PM

Bad guys guns never run out of bullets no matter how long they shoot them

Oscar the grouch · 10-08-2011 10:07PM

When people fall from high buildings, they always look back at where they came from.

skeleton_boy · 10-08-2011 10:15PM

If you find yourself lured into a forest to be told the person who lured you there is a vampire, be not afraid, he probably just wants to bone you.

uch · 10-08-2011 10:25PM

Chuck Norris is Invincible!!

Close Thread, everything else is irrelevant

AeoNGriM · 11-08-2011 09:36AM

Whenever a gang of armed cops/soldiers spring the trap and suddenly surround the bad guys, there will be a cacophany of weapon-readying sounds for at least 3-4 seconds, because the cops couldn't have loaded and made their weapons ready in the van on the way here.

Similarly, the guy with the pump action shotty will either forget to prime his shot until the last second for extra dramatic effect, or will prime multiple times for the same shot without firing.

watna · 11-08-2011 10:25AM

That apparently, the rumour that men love women's boobies is a lie. They will in fact always leave a woman's bra on when having sex because they're not interested in seeing them at all.

vex · 11-08-2011 10:51AM

Hand grenades (which normaly have a fuse of 3 -5 seconds) thrown at a the hero, normally give said hero enough time to make a quick one-liner, run in slow motion to out run the hugh fire ball, and jump out of the nearby window.

leonidas83 · 11-08-2011 10:53AM

To do what you say and say what you mean

Shivers26 · 11-08-2011 11:10AM

Tubsandtiles wrote: »

Bad guys guns never run out of bullets no matter how long they shoot them

Also person holding the gun probably has a bad ass ammunition belt strapped across his chest - but its never needed

A car crash will always end up with the car bursting into flames

Any exposure to radiation and you will turn into a superhero

Ditto getting bitten by an animal

Vicxas · 11-08-2011 11:31AM

Once you kill the bad guy, reinforcements will arrive RIGHT after the fight

Busi_Girl08 · 11-08-2011 11:42AM

People will always wait patiently until you've finished your big musical number before they burst into the room, and either kidnap someone, or make sneering comments while wearing a leather jacket.

paddyandy · 11-08-2011 11:47AM

When you watch a film at thirty that you liked as a teenager you realise why your father had doubts about your mental health.

super_furry · 11-08-2011 11:55AM

Ugly girls are actually really good looking girls, they're just wearing glasses and have pig-tails.

sensibleken · 11-08-2011 11:55AM

Harpo Marx is a dangerous sexual predator

Blazer · 11-08-2011 12:29PM

Car racing- There's always another gear

Gun fights- Your guns will always hold at least double the amount in real life and when you do run out of bullets you'll discover that the other guy is "empty" as well.

Agricola · 11-08-2011 12:33PM

Its perfectly reasonable to drive a car, or even a large truck off a high precipice and land it maybe 20 or 30 feet onto concrete below. Bar a few sparks from the undercarriage, the vehicle will function fine. Maybe drop down a gear and continue on your journey/chase sequence.

Reloading of automatic weapons only happens once in a while during long fire-fights. Small machine guns have massive unseen magazines possibly!

11-08-2011 03:24PM

One thing that really irritates me in film / TV shows is that whenver the main person is drinking (and drinking heavily, they always seem to be drinking shots of whiskey!), they instantly sober up if there is a sudden emergency!
If it's a cop and he's having a bad day and drinking to get over it, a uniformed officer will storm into the pub (they always know where they are),

"Detective McSwiggins, the Trampoline Killer has taken the mayor hostage!"
(jumps up from the chair he's been drinking in for the past few hours and pulls off a terrible quip)
"Looks like he's bounced back!"

No slurred words, no swaying, no collapsing or picking random fights...instantly sober, can drive, aim a gun and save the day!

Oscar the grouch · 11-08-2011 03:58PM

whenever the hero is surrounded by 10/15 bad guys in a fight,they only attack him one at a time.....

What's the number 1 thing you've learned from fillums?

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