So, apparently I'm a Captain now...

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 01:51PM #1

A few weeks ago I applied to open a bank account online with Ulster Bank. Just to see what would happen, I put my title as 'Captain'. (It was either that or Reverend).

Turns out they have now sent the letter to my Irish address as Captain Ugly Bolloxface (not actual name - changed to protect the innocent). Now my question is - will I have to show proof of my Captaincy or will they not care?

It'll be interesting going into that branch when I get back....

Biggins · 04-08-2011 01:53PM

You could have ordained yourself either lol
(Called yourself a 'Minister')

* http://www.themonastery.org/?destination=ordination

amacca · 04-08-2011 01:55PM

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

A few weeks ago I applied to open a bank account online with Ulster Bank. Just to see what would happen, I put my title as 'Captain'. (It was either that or Reverend).

Turns out they have now sent the letter to my Irish address as Captain Ugly Bolloxface (not actual name - changed to protect the innocent). Now my question is - will I have to show proof of my Captaincy or will they not care?

It'll be interesting going into that branch when I get back....

I've been a doctor for the past five years....postman talks....get the neighbours talkin:pac::pac::pac::pac:

pappyodaniel · 04-08-2011 01:57PM

That's brilliant, I'm going to do something similar

CardBordWindow · 04-08-2011 01:57PM

I like the sounds of that! I think I may open up an account there too!:D

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 01:57PM

Biggins wrote: »

You could have ordained yourself either lol
(Called yourself a 'Minister')

* http://www.themonastery.org/?destination=ordination

Haha that's brilliant! Interesting. Does any have a tl;dr summary of the aspects of this ordination? I might go ahead and do it, just to be able to call myself a Minister.

Alter-Ego · 04-08-2011 02:01PM

UPC still think I'm a Doctor for some reason despite me telling them I'm only a Mr.

mackg · 04-08-2011 02:02PM

So the banks don't care if the info you use to open an account is real? i'm sure they know what they are doing anyway.

Bonus points if you put your occupation as pirate.

dilallio · 04-08-2011 02:07PM

Alter-Ego wrote: »

UPC still think I'm a Doctor for some reason despite me telling them I'm only a Mr.

The fec*ers are still calling me Mrs despite calling them 3 times.

________________________________________________________
Lingerie & Stillettos or sale - Would suit large 'lady' or small man

GTE · 04-08-2011 02:07PM

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

Haha that's brilliant! Interesting. Does any have a tl;dr summary of the aspects of this ordination? I might go ahead and do it, just to be able to call myself a Minister.

Very easy. I have been a Universal Life Church Minister for about 5 years now.

Married many folk to inanimate objects. They allow that, someone was married to a Gibson guitar using one of my fellow Ministers.

I best send off for the certificate so I can prove it =D

stimpson · 04-08-2011 02:10PM

As kids we used to nick the credit card application forms from the bank, fill them in and send them off. They sent back forms for signing addressed to Elvis Presley, Pope John Paul II and Mr **** Off. Was tempted to commit some light credit card fraud in the name of the King or his holiness. Never had the balls to follow it through though.

Akrasia · 04-08-2011 02:13PM

dilallio wrote: »

The fec*ers are still calling me Mrs despite calling them 3 times.

________________________________________________________
Lingerie & Stillettos or sale - Would suit large 'lady' or small man

They'll probably require that you send them a certified photograph of yer knob before they'll change your details "for Data protection"

Temptamperu · 04-08-2011 02:15PM

*jumps up on table

Oh Captain, my Captain!

Killer Pigeon · 04-08-2011 02:16PM

I'm confused. Are you a reverend or a captain?

Son Of A Vidic · 04-08-2011 02:18PM

My brother did something similar a few years ago OP. Except he added the title 'Count'. So letters would arrive addressed to a Count Brian. I eventually pointed out to the postman that my brother wasn't a Count, but he was an actual Kunt.

charlemont · 04-08-2011 02:19PM

CardBordWindow wrote: »

I like the sounds of that! I think I may open up an account there too!:D

Yeah, I like the idea of Lord Charlemont, It would be splendid indeed.;)
I could even put on an Anglo accent to go with it.

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 02:29PM

Killer Pigeon wrote: »

I'm confused. Are you a reverend or a captain?

I'm a Captain. Captain Cunt, to you and others.

GTE · 04-08-2011 02:30PM

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

I'm a Captain. Captain Cunt, to you and others.

I wouldnt anger that kinda pigeon! I would hate to have to do another funeral.

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 02:32PM

bbk wrote: »

I wouldnt anger that kinda pigeon! I would hate to have to do another funeral.

Have you ordered your Ordination Credential thingy? Also, have you actually used your ordination in real life? I'm thinking about signing up...

Larianne · 04-08-2011 02:33PM

Are you a sea captain or an air captain?

thecornflake · 04-08-2011 02:36PM

I put my name down on a free catalogue service as "Shit stink Pat Kenny"

Oh good times, i'd say the postman gets a great laugh.

Norwayviking · 04-08-2011 02:38PM

The same thing happened to me in BOI,but they returned it with mr instead,and i am a Captain!!!
Not that it matters a hole lot,lol.

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 02:42PM

Larianne wrote: »

Are you a sea captain or an air captain?

I don't know actually - the option was just 'Captain'. Maybe I'll take this opportunity to become the world's first Air-Sea Captain, Airse Captain if you will.

Smcgie · 04-08-2011 02:44PM

I change my work email address to professor doctor (prof.dr) to email departments in England for the LOL!

Instant replies full of big spellchecked words and excellent grammar and punctuation. It's amazing how people respond to a title quicker

AgileMyth · 04-08-2011 02:44PM

Yeah you seem like an arse captain to me;)

UglyBolloxFace · 04-08-2011 02:46PM

AgileMyth wrote: »

Yeah you seem like an arse captain to me;)

http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?2,file=33874,filename=1097290-i_see_what_you_did_there_super.jpg

mconigol · 04-08-2011 02:57PM

Just McLovin is obviously your next step here op...

Larianne · 04-08-2011 02:58PM

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

I don't know actually - the option was just 'Captain'. Maybe I'll take this opportunity to become the world's first Air-Sea Captain, Airse Captain if you will.

You should see if you can get upgraded on flights, or book a table at restaurants easier with your title of Airse Captain.

Norwayviking · 04-08-2011 03:00PM

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

I don't know actually - the option was just 'Captain'. Maybe I'll take this opportunity to become the world's first Air-Sea Captain, Airse Captain if you will.

You are to late,i know one allready;)

Tabnabs · 04-08-2011 03:01PM

Well known fact that once you walk down the gangplank and step ashore, you become a Mr. again. Watch out for that one.

Norwayviking · 04-08-2011 03:16PM

Tabnabs wrote: »

Well known fact that once you walk down the gangplank and step ashore, you become a Mr. again. Watch out for that one.

Not completely true,depends on if you are in the navy or the merchant fleet.
And if you are in the merchant fleet,you are in command until you are relived, and until you enter the doorstep at home;)
But according to your title in the seamansbook and your license you are still a Captain,or a master mariner if you like.

So, apparently I'm a Captain now...

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