Crazy ex's.....

Columbia · 01-08-2011 08:28PM

I have an ex who broke into my bedroom (we shared a house...stupid mistake I know, chalk it up to youth) and went on my laptop to try and surveil me.

This girl set up at least (that I know of) five fake Myspace/Bebo profiles while we were dating, and mostly used them to try and manipulate me into being jealous or buying her bigger and better stuff (one of these made up guys was 'buying her a guitar for her birthday' and had gotten a tattoo of her name on his arm..happily I was suspicioned of her by this point and so it had no effect). Since we broke up, she has set up at least two more fake profiles; one to try and break me and my current girlfriend up, and a Facebook version of an old Myspace fakie, with profile pictures taken from Getty images and Wikipedia. She also had "band" with one of these fake guys, with music and all online. After some googling, it turned out all the music was taken from a band called Boyce Avenue.

Gummy Panda · 01-08-2011 08:40PM

Abi wrote: »

rambutman wrote: »

my crazy ex..............has

1) Thrown a brick through my window once
2) Robbed my house
3) Assaulted a girl I was seeing after her
4) Reported me to the police for being a drug-dealer (i am not.........but know one or two)
5) Called my parents up and spilled the beans on every thing I'd ever done - not all that bad but some sh1t you just don't want your parents to know.......like "he was out partying all weekend last weekend you know"
6) Told me if I didn't get back with her she'd report my father for being a paedo!!
7) Gone through facebook accounts, email accounts, mobile phones wallets........she never found anything out cos there was nothing to find out

....and thats just the **** that comes to mind.

too bad i'm still legally married to her!!

Would you mind PM'ing me her number? Her and my ex HAVE to meet.

More or less in the same boat as yourself, even being legally married to him. In the middle of sorting it out though. Jesus, I don't know where to begin with the shit he's done. I've protection and barring orders out against him at the moment, and there will be another court date for some damage he did recently. We broke up not long after we got married (or rather I did the breaking up), but we were stuck living together for a while. He got even more obsessive about me after we were married. I think he thought while he was living with me there was still a chance. While he was still in the house he did the whole phone / laptop checking crap too.

I've told him I'm seeing someone else, but he keeps asking me to finish it with himself to go back to him. One phone call is ass-kissing stuff, the next is a pile of abuse. The cops told me Im to record his calls, so I have been. He won't leave my parents alone either, turns up there drunk demanding to know where I am, and wingeing that he still 'loves' me. I really feel sorry for them, they don't deserve that, and they put up with his shit for years. They actually want to move over him

As I said, fire me her number - problem solved for us both!

Holy ****!

You've both had it rough.

WhatNowForUs? · 01-08-2011 08:53PM

Abi wrote: »

Would you mind PM'ing me her number? Her and my ex HAVE to meet.

More or less in the same boat as yourself, even being legally married to him. In the middle of sorting it out though. Jesus, I don't know where to begin with the shit he's done. I've protection and barring orders out against him at the moment, and there will be another court date for some damage he did recently. We broke up not long after we got married (or rather I did the breaking up), but we were stuck living together for a while. He got even more obsessive about me after we were married. I think he thought while he was living with me there was still a chance. While he was still in the house he did the whole phone / laptop checking crap too.

I've told him I'm seeing someone else, but he keeps asking me to finish it with himself to go back to him. One phone call is ass-kissing stuff, the next is a pile of abuse. The cops told me Im to record his calls, so I have been. He won't leave my parents alone either, turns up there drunk demanding to know where I am, and wingeing that he still 'loves' me. I really feel sorry for them, they don't deserve that, and they put up with his shit for years. They actually want to move over him

As I said, fire me her number - problem solved for us both!

Surely you know your own number?

Abi · 01-08-2011 09:00PM

Gummy Panda wrote: »

Holy ****!

You've both had it rough.

Like ya wouldn't believe panda. Back in the court offices in the morning

WhatNowForUs? wrote: »

Surely you know your own number?

I suppose that was meant to be funny?

carlybabe1 · 01-08-2011 09:20PM

Abi wrote: »

Like ya wouldn't believe panda. Back in the court offices in the morning

Ahh crap, spent farrrr too much time in the court, and every time i was sick with nerves for twenty four hrs hope everything works out ok for ye chick.
Was rememberin the last break up I had, not so much crazy stalker as wounded soul, and mannn did I pay for that. Sad part was we have kids he refused to see his son, told his family Id been unfaithful (which I hadnt) demanded all appliances back (that we'd payed for jointly) refused to pay maintenance, and took the car back (with all my stuff) out of the garage..actually, let me rephrase, he got his uncle to come to my house and try intimidate me into giving back the car

one night had a phonecall from him asking me was i enjoying my chinese :eek:

nothing more freaky than thinking your underwear is going missing, only to find them in the most obvious place 2 maybe 3 days later time to get the locks changed

Thankfully, we're past that now, wounded hearts heal etc etc

mattjack · 01-08-2011 09:40PM

Columbia wrote: »

I have an ex who broke into my bedroom (we shared a house...stupid mistake I know, chalk it up to youth) and went on my laptop to try and surveil me.

This girl set up at least (that I know of) five fake Myspace/Bebo profiles while we were dating, and mostly used them to try and manipulate me into being jealous or buying her bigger and better stuff (one of these made up guys was 'buying her a guitar for her birthday' and had gotten a tattoo of her name on his arm..happily I was suspicioned of her by this point and so it had no effect). Since we broke up, she has set up at least two more fake profiles; one to try and break me and my current girlfriend up, and a Facebook version of an old Myspace fakie, with profile pictures taken from Getty images and Wikipedia. She also had "band" with one of these fake guys, with music and all online. After some googling, it turned out all the music was taken from a band called Boyce Avenue.

where do you meet these people..? dont you get to know them before ya go out with them...

Abi · 01-08-2011 09:43PM

carlybabe1 wrote: »

Ahh crap, spent farrrr too much time in the court, and every time i was sick with nerves for twenty four hrs hope everything works out ok for ye chick.

Thanks

Was rememberin the last break up I had, not so much crazy stalker as wounded soul, and mannn did I pay for that. Sad part was we have kids he refused to see his son,

Thats really shitty Carly, it's not right to take it out on the nippers =/

told his family Id been unfaithful (which I hadnt) demanded all appliances back (that we'd payed for jointly) refused to pay maintenance, and took the car back (with all my stuff) out of the garage..actually, let me rephrase, he got his uncle to come to my house and try intimidate me into giving back the car

I got all this shite too. I just gave him what he wanted, but he was only using that stuff as a means to get back at me. Today he remembered theres another TV in the house, and he says he wants that too. Thats fine by me, another excuse for him to be ringing me gone. there wasn't that much stuff in the house belonging to him though, I bought pretty much everything. Oh and he told all his family that I had been having affairs when we were together too.

one night had a phonecall from him asking me was i enjoying my chinese :eek:

jesus, we could be talking about the same guy here... I get this 'I know where you are.' 'you've been seen' shit all the time. Hes fucking crackers.

nothing more freaky than thinking your underwear is going missing, only to find them in the most obvious place 2 maybe 3 days later time to get the locks changed

Get that done anyway Carly. I changed the locks in the house the day I fucked him out. It was costly, but at least I felt somewhat secure. I know him inside out, so I knew there would be a back-lash.

Thankfully, we're past that now, wounded hearts heal etc etc

Glad to hear it

--LOS-- · 01-08-2011 10:07PM

mattjack wrote: »

where do you meet these people..? dont you get to know them before ya go out with them...

people change!

mattjack · 01-08-2011 10:10PM

--LOS-- wrote: »

people change!

dont get me wrong...I,m not making fun of you,Abi or Carlybabe.....horrifying stories....

chloek · 01-08-2011 10:10PM

mattjack wrote: »

where do you meet these people..? dont you get to know them before ya go out with them...

how can you get to know them unless you go out with them ?
you don't really know people until you live with them.

mattjack · 01-08-2011 10:14PM

chloek wrote: »

how can you get to know them unless you go out with them ?
you don't really know people until you live with them.

I meant getting to know them properly before commiting to a relationship...the first dates etc ,the first couple of months..

--LOS-- · 01-08-2011 10:14PM

mattjack wrote: »

dont get me wrong...I,m not making fun of you,Abi or Carlybabe.....horrifying stories....

ye I know it's hard to understand, even when you've been through it, sure that's what makes it harder to get away, they weren't always that horrible person! And forget about the first few dates, months etc, can be first few years!

Gummy Panda · 01-08-2011 10:16PM

Abi wrote: »

Like ya wouldn't believe panda. Back in the court offices in the morning

Poor Abi

/pats on head

mattjack · 01-08-2011 10:20PM

good luck..Abi

Abi · 01-08-2011 10:22PM

/licks Panda

Abster will sort him out

mattjack wrote: »

where do you meet these people..? dont you get to know them before ya go out with them...

Well I met my ex very young, and at that stage I misread his obsessiveness as someone who just cared for me a lot. So immaturity had a part to play in it. I'm more annoyed with myself that I didn't end it a lot sooner, I'll happily weather bullshit he puts me through, but hes tormented my family for a long time, and hes now targeting my partner.

I've never wished him any harm, just wanted a clean break. But I've to use every inch of the law available to me to get him to stop. I'm mentally exhausted over it, and so is my family. I just wish he'd man-up and accept it, but I'm in it for the long haul with him by the looks of things.

Mattjack wrote:

Good luck Abi

Thanks

Princess Peach · 02-08-2011 01:32AM

Have had one and have been one.

I have many issues.

AnnaVanilla · 02-08-2011 11:59AM

Wow this is a really interesting thread, kinda nice to know that you're not the only one - About 6 years ago I was with a guy for about 7 months, nicest guy in the world, so considerate and a real gentleman. He told me his ex cheated on him and he found it really difficult trusting women... awww the poor thing, right? After 7 months we split up - long distance thing - and the nightmare began. I'd get a million missed calls, voicemails and crazy texts calling me the worst names imaginable if I didn't reply to him right away, that he'd send his cousins and/or sisters over to beat me up, that he was sure I was going to sleep with all his friends etc. Next day he'd be super nice. Eventually I got fed up with the Jekyll and Hyde act and asked him to stop contacting me. A friend of his later told me that he was actually the one cheating on his ex and that he'd also cheated on me pretty much constantly while we were together. Three years after I'd still get the occassional text where he'd try to get me to reply saying that his sister's baby was in hospital and didn't I care at all etc. A couple of months ago I got the second friend request on fb...

booboo88 · 02-08-2011 12:30PM

AnnaVanilla wrote: »

Wow this is a really interesting thread, kinda nice to know that you're not the only one - About 6 years ago I was with a guy for about 7 months, nicest guy in the world, so considerate and a real gentleman. He told me his ex cheated on him and he found it really difficult trusting women... awww the poor thing, right? After 7 months we split up - long distance thing - and the nightmare began. I'd get a million missed calls, voicemails and crazy texts calling me the worst names imaginable if I didn't reply to him right away, that he'd send his cousins and/or sisters over to beat me up, that he was sure I was going to sleep with all his friends etc. Next day he'd be super nice. Eventually I got fed up with the Jekyll and Hyde act and asked him to stop contacting me. A friend of his later told me that he was actually the one cheating on his ex and that he'd also cheated on me pretty much constantly while we were together. Three years after I'd still get the occassional text where he'd try to get me to reply saying that his sister's baby was in hospital and didn't I care at all etc. A couple of months ago I got the second friend request on fb...

block him on facebook? i would say change your number but im even too stubborn to do that myself

AnnaVanilla · 02-08-2011 12:57PM

booboo88 wrote: »

block him on facebook? i would say change your number but im even too stubborn to do that myself

I've just ignored him on fb, haven't looked into blocking but you're right, I should definitely do that. I refuse to change my number because of him but there can be months between him texting so I keep thinking that he's finally stopped. Haven't heard from him in a good while now so fingers crossed!

wild_cat · 02-08-2011 12:58PM

I have one guy who I went out with for two months about four years ago. The guy was five years older than me and I was 19 at the time. I met him through mutal friends. Two months like... not even that serious just a bad case of judgement on my part. He asked me out via his myspace's bands page and told me he had watched me for ages at a house party and couldn't stop thinking of me since.... I think my self esteem was a bit crap at the time so I just went with it. I feel like puking thinking of it now.

I still feel sick about the relationship... it doesn't help matters that every few months since he texts me radiohead lyrics or some emotionally highly depressed quote or something to do with why things didnt work out or about stuff we did together.

I usually never text back. But I got one on the day of my brothers wedding recently and I thought I've had enough of this.... the guy is nearly 30 he'd want to cop on to himself by now and I texted him back telling him that he should find someone else to make feel sick with his childish drivel and the the next time he texted me I would go to the gaurds. I had his number deleted so I hope it was him. Other wise I've lost a friend.

Haven't got one since

.

I never seen him again after we broke up but If I ever meet him in public..... I'm going to embarrass the **** out of him as he met a good friend of mine out one night... he brought him back to a house party and kept telling everyone that he knew me and I really don't want to be associated with this guy. I told my friend that he was dangerous and to keep away.

Just read the whole thread. Mines not that bad after all... some people are bat **** crazy!!!

booboo88 · 02-08-2011 01:04PM

AnnaVanilla wrote: »

I've just ignored him on fb, haven't looked into blocking but you're right, I should definitely do that. I refuse to change my number because of him but there can be months between him texting so I keep thinking that he's finally stopped. Haven't heard from him in a good while now so fingers crossed!

i find blocking helps alot. one guy i met from the north was a bit of a wierdo, he was 40 but kept telling me about his conquests and wat he'd like to do to me.
i still get the heebie jeebies. i refused to change my number and just ignored the texts, he eventually got the hint

AnnaVanilla · 02-08-2011 01:22PM

booboo88 wrote: »

i find blocking helps alot. one guy i met from the north was a bit of a wierdo, he was 40 but kept telling me about his conquests and wat he'd like to do to me.
i still get the heebie jeebies. i refused to change my number and just ignored the texts, he eventually got the hint

Ydrk, yes you'd think that eventually guys like this would get the hint. I can't believe that after all the sh*t he's said and done and it's been years now since I've actually seen him, this guy still thinks 'right it's been 4 months now since I last texted this girl, sure I'll give it another go'. Not sure how long it's been now but definitely a while and I have just ignored him the last few times so I think he must have moved on now.

Geekness1234 · 02-08-2011 01:29PM

This my be off topic,but in the US I hear the police recommend you get a decent sports whistle,so when they call you you blow it hard into the speaker.I'm not sure if it's effective but worth a shot.

jeddie20 · 02-08-2011 01:45PM

Broke up with the latest there in January, 8 months ago:pac:.

Since then she has been fairly mad to get back together..
1 She told me she was pregnant a while after I broke up with her, which terrefied me in fairness

.
2 She told me she was then dieing.
3 She still calls me at all hours wanting to talk, the latest of these calls was Saturday at 5 in the morning.
4 She 'likes' everything that I do on facebook, and everything that 6 of my good friends do.
5 When she sees any of my friends in the pub etc. she will not stop talking to them about me and will not leave them alone, so much that to actually get away from her they have to leave and go to another pub..
6 Oh and apparently shes loaded now after somehow getting 22k

!
7 Also got a bolloking after I put her in an offline list on fb.. which made her leave me alone for about 2 months, ah good times..

I try my best to stay away from her or where I think she may be

AnnaVanilla · 02-08-2011 02:18PM

Geekness1234 wrote: »

This my be off topic,but in the US I hear the police recommend you get a decent sports whistle,so when they call you you blow it hard into the speaker.I'm not sure if it's effective but worth a shot.

If it would just give them a bit of ringing in the ears for a few days, it'd be worth it

silly · 02-08-2011 02:29PM

My boyfriend has a crazy ex. They were broken up a few yrs when we got together, and then low and behold she decided she wanted him back. Que late night calls/ txts, she did everything in her power to make me think there was something going on, talking to him on a night out if I was gone to the bathroom and then running away when I got back, and then txting him saying " lovely to see you tonight, now delete this message incase she see's it". Things did get a bit hairy for a while and she almost succeeded in breaking us up, but now we are getting married in 8 weeks, so who's laughing now beatch!!!

opinion guy · 02-08-2011 02:56PM

Can I ask a question of those with crazy exes /stalkers.

Are ye engaging with them ?

I mean they are sending texts/calls etc. Do you answer them ? Even only sometimes ???
Cause generally this is a mistake. Its reinforcing they're behaviour. Even if you response if just to tell them to **** off its still a response. I mean its attention they are looking for. In some cases its control - they made you answer.

If it comes to the point where you've had the 'don't contact me again I won't answer you' you have to stick to it rigidly or it means nothing.

Best thing is just complete refusal to engage. Block them on facebook. Never answer their texts. Never answer emails. If txts/messages are particularly scary and abusive keep copies for the cops should the need arise. However don't delete their number - then you won't know its them if they call you in 6 months (this happened to me once - I wouldn't have answered phone if I'd know who it was but did answer not recognizing the number and then had to talk to the psycho). Better thing is to rename them as 'IGNORE' - that way when they call you, you get 'IGNORE' flashed up on your screen to remind you what your response should be if your will is lacking at that particular moment.

AnnaVanilla · 02-08-2011 03:09PM

opinion guy wrote: »

Can I ask a question of those with crazy exes /stalkers.

Are ye engaging with them ?

I mean they are sending texts/calls etc. Do you answer them ? Even only sometimes ???
Cause generally this is a mistake. Its reinforcing they're behaviour. Even if you response if just to tell them to **** off its still a response. I mean its attention they are looking for. In some cases its control - they made you answer.

If it comes to the point where you've had the 'don't contact me again I won't answer you' you have to stick to it rigidly or it means nothing.

Best thing is just complete refusal to engage. Block them on facebook. Never answer their texts. Never answer emails. If txts/messages are particularly scary and abusive keep copies for the cops should the need arise. However don't delete their number - then you won't know its them if they call you in 6 months (this happened to me once - I wouldn't have answered phone if I'd know who it was but did answer not recognizing the number and then had to talk to the psycho). Better thing is to rename them as 'IGNORE' - that way when they call you, you get 'IGNORE' flashed up on your screen to remind you what your response should be if your will is lacking at that particular moment.

To be honest, I did for a while; I was way too trusting, I liked the guy and wanted to think the best of him. Once he started with the real crazy stuff, I tried to ignore him but the guy was the most manipulative person you can imagine. I think I gave an example earlier of him saying his sister's baby was in the hospital. I really liked his sister so of course that had me worried and he tried to make it out as if I didn't care about her etc etc etc until eventually I'd reply. But in the end, I realized that I couldn't trust a single thing he did or said and I haven't replied to him since. Totally agree, ignore is the best option.

xaoifsx · 02-08-2011 03:30PM

Confab wrote: »

Agreed. Guys will do anything for sex, it's impossible that she had to blackmail him. Literally impossible. Unless...

I totally agree!!

tallaghtmick · 02-08-2011 03:30PM

A few years ago I was seeing a girl who said if I didnt talk to her she would kill herself.......I knew she wouldnt so I replied R.I.P.......and yes I have matured since then:o

Crazy ex's.....

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