Boards.ie of the World

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 05:31PM #1

Seems there will be a gap in the market since NOTW is to be folded.

If the members of AH got together to produce their own equally entertaining weekly read,who would occupy key areas within said trashy read.

I propose kfallon to oversee Personal Issues/Sexual Problems with ilovesleep under him to be the ying to his yang,Biggins to look after Consumer Affairs/Matters of National Security,flutterinbantam as Chief Headline Writer and that eeidgit scotty_irish in charge of proofreading:pac:

What position would you apply for and why.

The editors decision is final:pac::pac:

Absurdum · 07-07-2011 05:32PM

I'll get me lad out for page 3.

Biggins · 07-07-2011 05:42PM

Absurdum wrote: »

I'll get me lad out for page 3.

The lassies will have to check the small print then! :P

Dangerous Man · 07-07-2011 05:45PM

I'd like my own column. I've always wanted my own column where I could spew forth on whatever it was that took my fancy.

Tipsy McSwagger · 07-07-2011 05:46PM

I hate this paper already.

Turtyturd · 07-07-2011 05:47PM

I see the position of circlejerk initiator has been filled.

mikemac · 07-07-2011 05:47PM

Wolfe Tone and Keith AFC are going to give us the breaking news for Northern Ireland

flutterflye · 07-07-2011 05:49PM

I'd rather the gap weren't filled, and the whole industry died a natural death.
Wishful thinking.

Tipsy McSwagger · 07-07-2011 05:49PM

Wolfe Tone can be the royal correspondent.

Ken. · 07-07-2011 05:51PM

I wanna be a sport's reporter. I'll cover the ladies beach volleyball world circuit. I'll need 2 bic biro's and a 20 pack of toilet paper per week.

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 05:52PM

Absurdum wrote: »

I'll get me lad out for page 3.

Pics or gt....err.Scratch that.

Its a start.Ill put that down on my list of topics to discuss at the first meeting.

Gets tipex out.

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 05:54PM

Tipsy McSwagger wrote: »

I hate this paper already.

Good,good.All opinions are valid in a brainstorming session.

We are nothing without YOU.

Bosco boy · 07-07-2011 05:54PM

I want to work in the sports department superimposing turnips on unsucessful soccer managers heads

im invisible · 07-07-2011 05:59PM

Dangerous Man wrote: »

I'd like my own column. I've always wanted my own column where I could spew forth on whatever it was that took my fancy.

I dont want to see your column spew forth, at least not on page 3

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 06:00PM

Turtyturd wrote: »

I see the position of circlejerk initiator has been filled.

Sorry, intimate relations between staff will not be tolerated as tensions in the office can be exacerbated when you have someone sitting to the left of a right-hander in the daisy chain.

brummytom · 07-07-2011 06:01PM

I had training yesterday to be a counseller for kids, so I think I can use those skills for a 'Dear Deirdre' type page.

'Waah wahh I can't get it up'
'Stop whinging'

JONJO THE MISER · 07-07-2011 06:02PM

Ill offer Money and Budgeting advice.

previous user · 07-07-2011 06:06PM

People can always get their equivelant on the wall of
public toilets it's pretty much the same calibre of journalism.

Sunnyisland · 07-07-2011 06:07PM

I can answer the telephones I have a lovely Dublin voice :-)

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 06:10PM

brummytom wrote: »

I had training yesterday to be a counseller for kids, so I think I can use those skills for a 'Dear Deirdre' type page.

'Waah wahh I can't get it up'
'Stop whinging'

A bit disturbing that tom.

I can see the force is strong in you but you may need a sensei to show you how to channel that energy.Im going to put you down as an intern under kfallon.Perhaps you will pick up on his subtle yet effective ways.

scotty_irish · 07-07-2011 06:15PM

cesc77 wrote: »

Seems there will be a gap in the market since NOTW is to be folded.

If the members of AH got together to produce their own equally entertaining weekly read,who would occupy key areas within said trashy read.

I propose kfallon to oversee Personal Issues/Sexual Problems with ilovesleep under him to be the ying to his yang,Biggins to look after Consumer Affairs/Matters of National Security,flutterinbantam as Chief Headline Writer and that eeidgit scotty_irish in charge of proofreading:pac:

What position would you apply for and why.

The editors decision is final:pac::pac:

i think i'm ready to post in the nemesis thread!

if i have to proofread does that mean i can take on some editing duties too and edit out all the sh!te you write? lad. (haven't heard that since some skangers started on me about ten years ago)

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 06:15PM

realies wrote: »

I can answer the telephones I have a lovely Dublin voice :-)

Excellent I need a personal assistant.I think youll be perfect miss.

You are a lady arent you? I have to ask before I offer you the job formally.Equal opportunities and all that.

Oh and Im afraid new legislation requires you to PM me pictures so that I can make a fair decision.

We can work on the Dublin voice thing if youre successful:)

mikemac · 07-07-2011 06:15PM

The_Citizen is the crime correspondent
He can give it raw, he knows what it's like on the mean streets

Richard Dower is our TV writer, he knows all the best shows and can give reviews

Ruu_Old · 07-07-2011 06:17PM

I'll do horoscopes.

Sagittarius, stay in bed today!

cesc77 · 07-07-2011 06:25PM

scotty_irish wrote: »

i think i'm ready to post in the nemesis thread!

if i have to proofread does that mean i can take on some editing duties too and edit out all the sh!te you write? lad. (haven't heard that since some skangers started on me about ten years ago)

Small steps scotty.First we'll have to educate you on the use of capital letters.

I think you missed a comma after proofread.:(

Dont take it as criticism,its a learning process that some us pick up at the age of 11.It just takes a bit longer for some.

Stick by my side and I'll keep you right.

Oh and proofreading whilst half monkeyed at two in the morning may be an issue.I see something in you,something you dont see yourself,but I demand dedication and professionalism with a sprinkling of arseholery,so jump on board and enjoy the ride.

talla10 · 07-07-2011 07:41PM

I can do financial advice. Stick all your money on shesthefastest at 13.05 in Galway odds 76/1.

KeithAFC · 08-07-2011 09:55PM

mikemac wrote: »

Wolfe Tone and Keith AFC are going to give us the breaking news for Northern Ireland

His version and then my version. :pac:

admiralofthefleet · 08-07-2011 09:59PM

windsock for page 3

BEASTERLY · 08-07-2011 10:00PM

I would like a weekly column in which I explain how the public service is just a big shower of blood-sucking cunts, please?

theboss80 · 08-07-2011 10:00PM

I will handle all the weird news stories seeing as that's what the threads I start are generally about anyway. Oh and I can get a page worth of xxx chatlines to sign up also. Pics or gtfo basically.

Nice 1000th post

c_man · 08-07-2011 10:01PM

But could we rally against "SICK INTERNET PERVS" seeing as how, well, that would accurately describe 99% of the staff?

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