post here any embarrasing experiences you had in shops

CorkMan · 11-05-2011 07:33PM #1

I remember when I was 13 and went down to the video shop with my friend to get some VHS tapes to watch a movie. There wasn't that much of a great selection but we found a tape about a women called "Anna Nicole Smith".

The shop was just an ordinary one, and it has no porn section plus there were no porn images on the front or back of the cover. My friend was still looking at the tapes when I brought this one up the lady at the till to rent out. She gave me a weird look, but I didn't have a clue about what we were renting out.

BTW we both saw the movie at home but we were shocked when we saw it, but we didn't do any funny stuff, just looked at it. I didn't even ejaculate for the 1st time before I rented it out.

sgb · 11-05-2011 08:11PM

I did a really smelly guiness fart in Dunnes one Saturday morning, luckily the shop was busy so nobody knew it was me

discus · 11-05-2011 08:19PM

Took out money from my wallet and handed it to the cashier. Thought it was a fiver, it was actually a Boots Delay condom

Praetorian Saighdiuir · 11-05-2011 08:20PM

I bought tampons once........................stoopid sister in her rags and on crutches.

LimeTime · 11-05-2011 08:22PM

Once bought a huge, bright red dildo in a sex shop. And here's the embarrassing thing..................I.......I was................I was €2 short.:o:o:o

Sefirah · 11-05-2011 08:26PM

LimeTime wrote: »

Once bought a huge, bright red dildo in a sex shop. And here's the embarrassing thing..................I.......I was................I was €2 short.:o:o:o

€2 and 1 man

I'm sure the cashier could sort something out for you
Oooh this is how bad porn starts :O

The King of Moo · 11-05-2011 08:44PM

As a young kid, maybe 10, I was sent into a shop at a petrol station to get a few things, including the newspaper. The shop had two tills. I left the things on the counter, when the customer at the other till, a middle-aged woman with her nose stuck so far in the air I could count all her nasal hairs, looked at the newspaper and just took it. The sales assistant at her till rang it through, don't think he noticed what she'd done. The woman then just walked away. All the time I just stood there with a shocked look on my little face, and I remember just looking at the sales assistant, both shocked. Then I had to walk all the way right to the very back of the long shop where the papers were to get another one. The sales assistant never said anything, I think to further spare my blushes.
I wish I had been older/better able to react more quickly

Foxylady123 · 11-05-2011 08:45PM

I was in Tescos one day and asked a lady in uniform for the price of something, she started laughing, i thought it wasnt that funny until she told me she didnt know as she worked in Dunnes Stores!!! Morto but we laughed every time we meet in the shop as we did our shopping!!!

kfallon · 11-05-2011 08:47PM

Was in Heatons one Xmas Eve, paid for my stuff, walked out only for the store alarm to go off, security guard comes over asks to see my bag and the receipt. Place was packed, stupid bint behind the counter forgot to scan the security thing on one item. Everyone looking like I was a thief.

Since that day I always expect those alarms in shops to go off when I walk thru them

MardiB · 11-05-2011 08:57PM

kfallon wrote: »

Was in Heatons one Xmas Eve, paid for my stuff, walked out only for the store alarm to go off, security guard comes over asks to see my bag and the receipt. Place was packed, stupid bint behind the counter forgot to scan the security thing on one item. Everyone looking like I was a thief.

Since that day I always expect those alarms in shops to go off when I walk thru them

Heatons, no expense spared eh;)

Surely I'm not the only one who has experienced the horror more so than embarrassment of being very young and walking a few steps holding on to a buggy before you realise it's not your mam pushing the buggy :eek:

phasers · 11-05-2011 08:59PM

I was caught robbin toilet paper from lidl

Shameful I know. I normally rob from M&S but it was an emergency!

SeaFields · 11-05-2011 09:02PM

kfallon wrote: »

Was in Heatons one Xmas Eve, paid for my stuff, walked out only for the store alarm to go off, security guard comes over asks to see my bag and the receipt. Place was packed, stupid bint behind the counter forgot to scan the security thing on one item. Everyone looking like I was a thief.

Since that day I always expect those alarms in shops to go off when I walk thru them

You should have rode your horse straight to a solicitor.

HappyTuesday · 11-05-2011 09:06PM

*cough*BULLSHIT*cough*

krudler · 11-05-2011 09:09PM

was meeting my girlfriend at the time for lunch and as I was walking through town I saw her go into a clothes shop up ahead of me, I walked in after her, saw her looking at a rail of dresses and walked up behind her and pinched her arse, it wasnt her. she saw the funny side though (the wrong girl, not the missus, never told her :pac: )

kfallon · 11-05-2011 09:11PM

MardiB wrote: »

Heatons, no expense spared eh;)

I bought stuff for myself there, my Xmas presents were long bought at that stage!

phasers · 11-05-2011 09:27PM

Ghandee wrote: »

Was in Tescos one evening and bought

1 x rasher
1 x sausage
1 x egg
1 x bagel

You can't buy one egg.

kfallon · 11-05-2011 09:31PM

phasers wrote: »

You can't buy one egg.

You also can't pass off jokes as real life experiences!

Aidric · 11-05-2011 09:31PM

Ghandee wrote: »

Was in Tescos one evening and bought

1 x rasher
1 x sausage
1 x egg
1 x bagel

The woman serving said to me "I bet your single?"

I said YEAH!!!! I am, did you know that just from me buying one of everything????:D:D:D

She said "NO!, its cos your one ugly fcuker!!"

Didnt feel to proud that day

Oh dear. You ripped that from a comedian, can't quite put my finger on who it was, possibly Billy Connolly.

Corruptedmorals · 11-05-2011 09:40PM

Probably doesn't count as I was working there...but the time I shouted 'Do you have a clubcard?' at the long queue instead of next please. Also shouted out my friend's name at the queue who was on the till next to me another time. Mortifyingly public.

As for being a customer...nothing really comes to mind? As for someone forgetting to take off a security tag, people ARE human you know. People are going to miss one out of the hundreds they deal with every single day.

Crackle · 11-05-2011 09:52PM

Nothing too embarrassing but 1 day I was in HMV buying a DVD. Anyway, I paid for it and got back my change & receipt and then headed for the door. Just as I was about to leave I realised I had no DVD in my hand and looked back to see the girl behind the counter holding up a bag and trying not to laugh at me. She had turned to get a bag for me after giving me my change and for some reason I took off. Felt a bit of a tool walking back to the counter.

LordSutch · 11-05-2011 10:30PM

My Mother once went into a corner shop in England & asked for a 'small brown pan' to which the owner said "The hardware shop is in the High Street Missus" he then screwed up his face and looked at her as if she was mad > she didn't argue, she just went red faced with embarrassment & fled in a hurry

She did of course mean a 'small loaf of bread' - truly priceless.

AlmostQuick · 11-05-2011 10:37PM

Many years ago I went into a shop called The Alchemist's Head to buy a book by Alesteir Crowley, a big book that cost a fortune. Anyway, I was off my tits and going back out of the shop started pushing a wall where I thought the door was. I reckon I was pushing for around five minutes before the sound of laughter alerted me to the fact I wasn't at the door! The book was **** too.

OhMeOhMy · 11-05-2011 10:39PM

Asked a foreign national working in a service station for 'a box of matches.'
'A box of matches?'
'Yeah, a box of matches.'
Guy comes back with eight boxes of matches. Wasn't embarrassing but we both saw the funny side

Abi · 11-05-2011 10:41PM

Crackle wrote: »

Nothing too embarrassing but 1 day I was in HMV buying a DVD. Anyway, I paid for it and got back my change & receipt and then headed for the door. Just as I was about to leave I realised I had no DVD in my hand and looked back to see the girl behind the counter holding up a bag and trying not to laugh at me. She had turned to get a bag for me after giving me my change and for some reason I took off. Felt a bit of a tool walking back to the counter.

That happens to me regularly. I pay for stuff then leave without whatever I bought. Only once did it happen the other way around.. I had a few things in the trolley in the home ware section in a shop in a large complex when I took a call, got so distracted by what I what was said to me that I'd gotten to the car park by the time I'd realized I'd stuff in the trolley. I was mortified. I went back to the shop, and straight up to customer services in a panic saying that I wanted to pay for stuff I left the store without paying but didn't want to get into bother with the security. She looked at the guy beside her and said, well he's the security guard with a smile.

"Well you're fucking useless'

I said to him.. the two of them laughed, she took the money then all was good

Not a headline moment, but my mother laughed at something I said to her the other day in a crowded shop, and farted at the same time. I bolted in the other direction >_>

Gillington · 11-05-2011 10:46PM

MardiB wrote: »

Heatons, no expense spared eh;)

Good one

Gunslinger92 · 11-05-2011 10:59PM

I was in a clothes shop one day, trying on a top with a zip. Tried to undo the zip but it was stuck :eek: Spent about 10 minutes pulling and tugging at it, it's a wonder I didn't break it! Eventually I had to go up to one of girls working there and say "Eh... Sorry.. I can't seem to get the zip undone..."

She was sound about it though!

Mary28 · 11-05-2011 11:05PM

I thought I had cystitis once when I was in Poland or Spain, can't remember which. I went to a pharmacists but I obviously had no idea what the Polish/Spanish word for cystitis was so I tried to explain with hand gestures and sound effects, making pissing sounds, pointing with my hand and saying Fire Fire. They had no idea what I was on about. Started off with one assistant, then another, then the pharmacist arrived in and he eventually guessed it and said the word for them and they all went "oh yes, hmmm", all disappointed with my charades attempt.

Twice in the last few months I haven't had enough money on my visa debit card to pay for my groceries in Dunnes. Totally mortified but they were so nice about it.

Blondini · 11-05-2011 11:10PM

Ghandee wrote: »

Was in Tescos one evening and bought

1 x rasher
1 x sausage
1 x egg
1 x bagel

The woman serving said to me "I bet your single?"

I said YEAH!!!! I am, did you know that just from me buying one of everything????:D:D:D

She said "NO!, its cos your one ugly fcuker!!"

Didnt feel to proud that day

PMSL

(in 1993)

oompaloompa · 11-05-2011 11:12PM

Wasn't in a shop, but I was once verbally abused for looking wrong at a really unconvincing cross dresser in a doctors surgery.... I actually wished the ground would swallow me up

Went for coffee with my mum, was nibbling happily on a chocolate muffin when she points out mould.... eugh:eek:

I take it up to counter, and politely point out the mould... it was white chocolate... looked funny in the muffin though

:o:o:o:o:o:o

onlyrocknroll · 11-05-2011 11:30PM

Corruptedmorals wrote: »

Probably doesn't count as I was working there...but the time I shouted 'Do you have a clubcard?' at the long queue instead of next please.

Maybe it's just cos I've had a few drinks, but this is hilarious.

The Princess Bride · 11-05-2011 11:42PM

Browsing through MAGIC in ilac centre in dub years ago, we all had our rucksacks on our backs as we were heading away for the weekend.
Headed out of the shop , halfway down Henry St, couldn't understand why everyone was staring and pointing at me.
Then my friends noticed that a hideously gaudy shirt had caught onto the back of my rucksack - the alarm hadn't sounded when I'd left shop.Mortified, had to go and return it.:o

Seriously.

If I'd wanted to shoplift,I wouldn't have picked that thing.

post here any embarrasing experiences you had in shops

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