Couples reading each other's texts

NomdePlume · 04-05-2011 05:03PM #1

What's the general feeling on this?

Lately a friend of mine mentioned to me that she and her fiance read each other's texts "all the time", not for a snoop but in front of each other. "Oh you just got a text from so-and-so, it says..." sort of thing.

This weirded me out a bit, and I'm now curious as to how common it is for couples to access each other's messages, and whether I am weird for feeling weirded out.

Micky Dolenz · 04-05-2011 05:03PM

That marriage will never last.

kfallon · 04-05-2011 05:05PM

Nobody reads my texts unless I show them!

If whoever text me wanted someone else to read them they'd have text that person too

Genghiz Cohen · 04-05-2011 05:06PM

Always ask first.

Kiera · 04-05-2011 05:07PM

I would ask my BF to read mine if I’m driving (he does the same), but if I found him snooping through my phone without my permission I wouldn’t be too happy.

Dangerdunf · 04-05-2011 05:09PM

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

hondasam · 04-05-2011 05:09PM

Nobody would want to read my txts.

Kiera · 04-05-2011 05:10PM

Dangerdunf wrote: »

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

Why don’t you tell her to stop?

Korvanica · 04-05-2011 05:12PM

Dangerdunf wrote: »

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

Same here, its bloody annoying...

sensibleken · 04-05-2011 05:13PM

wait....they can put their genitals in each others mouths but not read each others texts?

hondasam · 04-05-2011 05:13PM

Dangerdunf wrote: »

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

why Don't you lock your phone ?

stovelid · 04-05-2011 05:15PM

My phone has automatic lock with a swipe code.

It doesn't mean I have anything to hide but reading other people's texts can just lead to misunderstandings. And everybody deserves some privacy.

kfallon · 04-05-2011 05:16PM

Only thing worse than reading my texts is someone sending a text from my phone trying to be funny......that usually deserves a swift kick in the bollix/gee

Kiera · 04-05-2011 05:17PM

kfallon wrote: »

Only thing worse than reading my texts is someone sending a text from my phone trying to be funny......that usually deserves a swift kick in the bollix/gee

FFS! How many times do i have to say sorry????? :mad:

JustAddWater · 04-05-2011 05:18PM

Dangerdunf wrote: »

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

text yourself "Stop reading my texts!"

kfallon · 04-05-2011 05:20PM

Kiera wrote: »

FFS! How many times do i have to say sorry????? :mad:

What???
I'm on about people sending texts to your parents trying to be funny. One guy did it to a mate of mine years ago in The Bleeding Horse, I went mental, nearly hit the fooker

ibarelycare · 04-05-2011 05:21PM

I've no problem with anyone looking at my texts if I ask them to read them for me or if there's one that I want to show them and I tell them to look through my texts for it, but if I caught my boyfriend looking through my texts without my permission I'd be pretty pissed off. Not because I've anything to hide, but because it shows sneakiness and a lack of trust.

I'd never do it to anyone either. I think if that starts happening in a relationship it's the beginning of the end. I know of some girls (no guys, but that doesn't mean they don't do it either) who constantly check their bf's phones, emails and Facebook behind their back and they thing this is absolutely fine because there should be no secrets between couples :rolleyes:

Kiera · 04-05-2011 05:21PM

kfallon wrote: »

What???
I'm on about people sending texts to your parents trying to be funny. One guy did it to a mate of mine years ago in The Bleeding Horse, I went mental, nearly hit the fooker

Yeah you nearly hit me when i did it on your phone too, remember!

prinz · 04-05-2011 05:22PM

OH and I would do it the odd time but not regularly. No biggie. We've nothing to hide from each other tbh. Depends on the situation really, we usually have our phones with us so it doesn't arise, but if I'm out and have left my workphone at home say I'd ask her to read them, stuff like that.

kfallon · 04-05-2011 05:23PM

Kiera wrote: »

Yeah you nearly hit me when i did it on your phone too, remember!

I forgot about that and no I didn't!!!

Micky Dolenz · 04-05-2011 05:24PM

Dateline thata way >>>>>>>>>>>>

ibarelycare · 04-05-2011 05:25PM

prinz wrote: »

OH and I would do it the odd time but not regularly. No biggie. We've nothing to hide from each other tbh. Depends on the situation really, we usually have our phones with us so it doesn't arise, but if I'm out and have left my workphone at home say I'd ask her to read them, stuff like that.

But would you do it in another situation? Like if she left her phone at home and went out would you go "Oh I think I'll have a read of her texts"?

ShamoBuc · 04-05-2011 05:27PM

Never had a problem with the wife reading my texts - that said, I always delete the dirty ones.

prinz · 04-05-2011 05:31PM

ibarelycare wrote: »

But would you do it in another situation? Like if she left her phone at home and went out would you go "Oh I think I'll have a read of her texts"?

No... but have done it for the craic when she is there.. and she has done it when I'm present. Don't see any harm in it, but it definitely wouldn't be a case of sneaking a look or being sly or underhand about it.

ibarelycare · 04-05-2011 05:34PM

prinz wrote: »

No... but have done it for the craic when she is there.. and she has done it when I'm present. Don't see any harm in it, but it definitely wouldn't be a case of sneaking a look or being sly or underhand about it.

But why would you look at someone else's texts "for the craic"? What's fun about it?

NomdePlume · 04-05-2011 05:38PM

prinz wrote: »

No... but have done it for the craic when she is there.. and she has done it when I'm present. Don't see any harm in it, but it definitely wouldn't be a case of sneaking a look or being sly or underhand about it.

Would you ever read each other's emails? How about letters? Just wondering if there's a boundary somewhere, or if this tends to apply only to texts.

BostonB · 04-05-2011 05:41PM

If you've something to hide you shouldn't leave it on your phone, or unlocked. Thats just dumb. If you've nothing to hide, then there really no issue with someone looking at your texts is there. Of course you might have other stuff on their, financial stuff, family business etc. That they are not entitled to know.

Theres a difference between a couple who haven't been together that long, and a couple who've been together years. Wait till you have kids and they start working out your pin no and going through your stuff, phones, ipods, laptops, DVD collection, movies on your media box, books, magazines.

Dublinstiofán · 04-05-2011 05:45PM

Dangerdunf wrote: »

My girlfriend always reads mine if I leave my phone around. Wrecks my head!!:mad:

Its called a passcode and you can change it as many times as you like.

cosanostra · 04-05-2011 05:46PM

My mates woman not only reads his messages but replies and then deletes them, we only found this out recently and were wondering why he always refused to go on the beer!

Aoifey! · 04-05-2011 05:50PM

On my phone the first few words of the message comes up before you go into it and my boyfriend has a really annoying habit of reading the start bit. I think he just does it cause he knows it annoys me, he couldn't care less what it actually says.

NomdePlume · 04-05-2011 05:57PM

BostonB wrote: »

If you've something to hide you shouldn't leave it on your phone, or unlocked. Thats just dumb. If you've nothing to hide, then there really no issue with someone looking at your texts is there. Of course you might have other stuff on their, financial stuff, family business etc. That they are not entitled to know.

It's not even purely about the couple wanting total transparency in their relationship. It's also about everyone who texts them.

I barely know my friend's fiance. And now I realise he has probably read a lot of my texts to her over the years.

In fairness I've never texted her about anything very personal, but if I had, I would have figured it was a private text. If this text-sharing thing is common, I can consider myself really naive for thinking that.

Couples reading each other's texts

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