When you KNOW it's time to go home.

AskMyChocolate · 21-04-2011 07:49PM #1

Okay, let's start with the obvious ones.

1) "I think Abrekababara gets a lot of undeserved bad press."

2) When you start staring at women's bums (or tits if you're a tit man), rather than sneaking a "nonchalant" look.

Middle ground. The phrases.

1) "Oh go on so, twist my arm."

2) "Shur a bird never flew on one wing"

3) "Don't you know I never take a short"

Indicators.

1) When you hold a door open for someone who's still fifty yards away because you think they're going through.

2) When, in a packed pub, washing your hands after taking a piss becomes a desirable luxury rather than an annoying necessity.

So AHers, when do you know it's time to go home? Obviously, I'm looking for indicators, as, if you have failed to notice them, you're on to steps two and three.:pac:

But, all contributions on all levels, gratefully accepted.

Chocolate

cml387 · 21-04-2011 07:52PM

Glimmer of light in the eastern sky.

Caoimhín · 21-04-2011 07:53PM

sO WHAT if you are my sister... hic.. oo

cosmicfart · 21-04-2011 07:55PM

Defo a TITS man be I!!

KeithM89_old · 21-04-2011 07:56PM

When you start to question the 'If you cant lift her, dont shift her' rule.

Aidric · 21-04-2011 07:56PM

When you start texting your ex girlfriend to see what she's up to.

Where To · 21-04-2011 07:59PM

When heading down the gentlemans club to spend £1400 seems like a great idea

Degag · 21-04-2011 08:02PM

When more of the aforementioned piss goes on the floor than in the urinal.

True story, met a guy i knew in the jacks in a nightclub one night. He was pissed. First guy i've ever seen pissing on top of his shoes and worst of all he didn't even notice. Put his hand out to shake my hand after he was done..... no thanks!

stupidusername · 21-04-2011 08:02PM

when you're thinking to yourself ah it's grand! I have loads of money sure! (when you're stone broke) i'll get the next round!

brummytom · 21-04-2011 08:03PM

When you decide to start singing in the middle of a pub.

When you decide to ring your entire 'phonebook' "for a chat"

Both happened to me the other night

cml387 · 21-04-2011 08:05PM

Children start to cry amd nuns cross themselves.

(say,what kind of place am I drinking in?)

Degag · 21-04-2011 08:07PM

brummytom wrote: »

When you decide to start singing in the middle of a pub.

When you decide to ring your entire 'phonebook' "for a chat"

Both happened to me the other night

Tried that a few weeks ago. Bad sign when i couldn't remember the words to "The Fields of Athenry"

Was pretty happy the next day though!

brummytom · 21-04-2011 08:14PM

Degag wrote: »

Tried that a few weeks ago. Bad sign when i couldn't remember the words to "The Fields of Athenry"

Was pretty happy the next day though!

I wish more people would forget the words to that song.

I don't really remember Tuesday night.... all I remember is me stopping and some woman going 'Now you know the truth of it, she's no longer my obsession' and me giving her very exaggerated thumbs up

no_bother · 21-04-2011 08:15PM

When you begin you think you are a great dancer!

21-04-2011 08:15PM

When I get bored and everyone is getting drunk

EverEvolving · 21-04-2011 08:16PM

When you have to close one eye to read a text

Or when you realise the bar DO infact take laser and give cash back, oh such a bad bad idea. Ok - maybe that might not be the time to go home but it gets you on the way much more quickly.

brummytom · 21-04-2011 08:17PM

Oh, just remembered one.

When you go to a pub that's doing a 'free bar for musicians' and get told late on in the night "We're going to have to start charging you now, sorry".

Kevin Duffy · 21-04-2011 08:19PM

I find the dividing line between drunk and sober to be that in an even half full pub it takes ages to get anywhere, whereas in a jam-packed one I can stroll around like there's no one else there.

Sinfonia · 21-04-2011 08:23PM

EverEvolving wrote: »

When you have to close one eye to read a text

While slightly tipping side to side like a metronome

Dave0301 · 21-04-2011 08:27PM

When you are easily convinced that an unplanned trip to Krakow is a good idea...

alexa5x5 · 21-04-2011 08:28PM

When I’m talking utter bollox to in the ladies to a stranger, but think I’ve never had a more interesting discussion before.

When all reason and foresight goes out the window and I’m spending money like there’s no tomorrow.

When I think "god I can really dance" when in reality I look like I’m having a fit.

Final straw is when I can’t stop giggling, then I know its home time.

AskMyChocolate · 21-04-2011 08:30PM

Caoimhín wrote: »

sO WHAT if you are my sister... hic.. oo

Inability to control caps lock. Like it centurion, like it.

RachaelVO · 21-04-2011 08:32PM

When I can't see... I have to squint to put anything (drink included) into focus!

AskMyChocolate · 21-04-2011 08:36PM

brummytom wrote: »

When you decide to start singing in the middle of a pub.

When you decide to ring your entire 'phonebook' "for a chat"

Both happened to me the other night

No, that's when it's time for them to man up and join you.

Degag · 21-04-2011 08:39PM

alexa5x5 wrote: »

Final straw is when I can’t stop giggling, then I know its home time.

Or hiccups:mad:

AskMyChocolate · 21-04-2011 08:40PM

stupidusername wrote: »

when you're thinking to yourself ah it's grand! I have loads of money sure! (when you're stone broke) i'll get the next round!

Only qualifies if you've actually ordered it before realising the terrible truth! :pac:

Kevin Duffy · 21-04-2011 08:40PM

alexa5x5 wrote: »

When I’m talking utter bollox to in the ladies to a stranger, but think I’ve never had a more interesting discussion before.

When all reason and foresight goes out the window and I’m spending money like there’s no tomorrow.

When I think "god I can really dance" when in reality I look like I’m having a fit.

Final straw is when I can’t stop giggling, then I know its home time.

I know you meant those as bad signs, but, er...what are doing Sat night?

EverEvolving · 21-04-2011 08:40PM

Kevin Duffy wrote: »

I find the dividing line between drunk and sober to be that in an even half full pub it takes ages to get anywhere, whereas in a jam-packed one I can stroll around like there's no one else there.

It's like you're swimming against the tide, but you're winning (and not in the Charlie Sheen sense)

timewilltell · 21-04-2011 08:41PM

When you kiss your best friend of the opposite sex and think 'Well, we weren't that great of friends anyways.'

When you see someone you went to Primary School with and give them an update of your life so far.

When you shout, THIS IS MY SONG! For every song.

kfallon · 21-04-2011 08:42PM

When you bend down to try pot the black to win a game of pool and you fall asleep!

When taco chips seem irresistible!

When someone replies to a text you sent but you can't remember what you asked in the first place!

AskMyChocolate · 21-04-2011 08:54PM

EverEvolving wrote: »

When you have to close one eye to read a text

Or when you realise the bar DO infact take laser and give cash back, oh such a bad bad idea. Ok - maybe that might not be the time to go home but it gets you on the way much more quickly.

LOL.

I used to work in London when I was much younger, and my train back to Kent used to go from Charing Cross. On a Friday night, you would literally see people leaning up against pillars and holding their faces against the pillars in an effort to see the timetable and stop it from flicking over.

Had forgotten about that. Thanks for the memory.

Choco

When you KNOW it's time to go home.

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