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Jesus is dead

2

Comments

  • #32
    parker kent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭parker kent


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    What about your rebirth day?

    Do you get a card or flowers for rebirthday? I always make a rebirthday faux pas.


  • #33
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    parker kent wrote: »
    Do you get a card or flowers for rebirthday? I always make a rebirthday faux pas.

    I got a card from my mother but not for my father. Fair enough I suppose because last year I did get her a card but didn't get a Rebirthday Present Fo' Pa.


  • #34
    Plazaman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,037 ✭✭✭Plazaman


    mfceiling wrote: »
    Did anyone else know he was dead?

    Damn, that was kept quite. Mudderfúcka owed me money too (Full House beats a Straight Flush my áss)


  • #35
    GrizzlyMan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 957 ✭✭✭GrizzlyMan


    Jesus Who?


  • #36
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    GrizzlyMan wrote: »
    Jesus Who?

    Jesus O'Nazareth.


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  • #37
    deise go deo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,677 ✭✭✭deise go deo


    Korvanica wrote: »
    How does something that never existed die?

    You don't believe Jesus ever existed?

    How did the church start then? Without a man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago, where did it come from in your opinion?


  • #38
    Penn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 37,888 ✭✭✭✭Penn


    deise go deo wrote: »
    You don't believe Jesus ever existed?

    How did the church start then? Without a man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago, where did it come from in your opinion?

    A man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago

    Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you.... The New Testement which is now available on Twitter


  • #39
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    deise go deo wrote: »
    You don't believe Jesus ever existed?

    How did the church start then? Without a man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago, where did it come from in your opinion?

    Well the people in power at the time decided they needed something to keep the people stupid and in check for fear of pissing off a god. The baby murdering, plague spreading genocidal dickhead of the old testatement wasnt very "family friendly" so they decided to lighten him up a bit, so out went mr baby murderer, in came the all loving dad who sent his only son to atone for our sings, badabaoom, 2000 more years of keeping people stupid and believing in something about as logical as unicorns.


  • #40
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    Barrington wrote: »
    A man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago

    Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you.... The New Testement which is now available on Twitter

    @pontiaspilate you wanker these nails hurt

    retweet

    @therealjesus: sorry! but these simpleton locals demanded it, I was letting you go!


  • #41
    deise go deo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,677 ✭✭✭deise go deo


    krudler wrote: »
    Well the people in power at the time decided they needed something to keep the people stupid and in check for fear of pissing off a god. The baby murdering, plague spreading genocidal dickhead of the old testatement wasnt very "family friendly" so they decided to lighten him up a bit, so out went mr baby murderer, in came the all loving dad who sent his only son to atone for our sings, badabaoom, 2000 more years of keeping people stupid and believing in something about as logical as unicorns.

    So the people in charge at the time set up this new religion, and then completely rejected it as it was a threat to their power?

    The people in charge in the holy land at the time were the Jewish pharisies, They did not convert en mass to christainity, they stayed as Jews.

    The people in overall controle were the Romans, who were pagan at the time and had no need to create a new monotheistic religion they did not believe in to replace the old monotheistic religion they did not believe in.

    If your going to argue against religion, it would help if you were at least informed about the subject.:rolleyes:


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  • #42
    Penn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 37,888 ✭✭✭✭Penn


    krudler wrote: »
    @pontiaspilate you wanker these nails hurt

    retweet

    @therealjesus: sorry! but these simpleton locals demanded it, I was letting you go!

    @doubtingtommy Jesus back frm dead? LOL! If he came back in here I'd stick my finger in his hole!


  • #43
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    Barrington wrote: »
    @doubtingtommy Jesus back frm dead? LOL! If he came back in here I'd stick my finger in his hole!

    @leftsidethief who's this hairy bloke? they seem awfully pissed off at him

    @rightsidethief I dunno, christ all I did was steal some oranges, how hard is it to avoid scurvy?!

    @leftsidethief who's christ?


  • #44
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    deise go deo wrote: »
    So the people in charge at the time set up this new religion, and then completely rejected it as it was a threat to their power?

    The people in charge in the holy land at the time were the Jewish pharisies, They did not convert en mass to christainity, they stayed as Jews.

    The people in overall controle were the Romans, who were pagan at the time and had no need to create a new monotheistic religion they did not believe in to replace the old monotheistic religion they did not believe in.

    If your going to argue against religion, it would help if you were at least informed about the subject.:rolleyes:

    and on the 10th day, the lord sent us SARCASM!


  • #45
    usernamegoes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 901 ✭✭✭usernamegoes


    He wasn't a very good evangelist if he left it at that. He should have said "Jesus WAS dead, rose from the dead and never died again as he ascended into heaven."

    PS I don't believe any of this.


  • #46
    Penn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 37,888 ✭✭✭✭Penn


    krudler wrote: »
    @leftsidethief who's this hairy bloke? they seem awfully pissed off at him

    @rightsidethief I dunno, christ all I did was steal some oranges, how hard is it to avoid scurvy?!

    @leftsidethief who's christ?

    @Judas Just bought a brand new Ford Horse Chariot for 30 pieces of silver. 2 Horse Power! Who wants to go for a spin?

    @RebeccaBlack Which seat can I take?


  • #47
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    @Joseph - What have you gone and done now Jesus? Your mother's heart is broken. Feckin' stepkids!


  • #48
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    deise go deo wrote: »
    You don't believe Jesus ever existed?

    How did the church start then? Without a man wandering around the Jerusalem area around 2000 years ago, where did it come from in your opinion?

    Well we know there was a religion centered around Bacchus, and I don't think anyone is saying there was a half man, half goat creature with horns wandering around greece...


  • #49
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    @Joseph - What have you gone and done now Jesus? Your mother's heart is broken. Feckin' stepkids!

    @Jesus - What do you care? You're not me real da anyways!!!!!!!


  • #50
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Nodin wrote: »
    @Jesus - What do you care? You're not me real da anyways!!!!!!!

    @Joseph - Just wait until they take you down off that cross. I'll bleedin' kill ya meself so I will!


  • #51
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    I'll buy Jesus existed as a real person, guy going around "look just be nice to each other" ? I'll accept that, but not all the magic stuff, that was added later to spice up the tale. Religion is basically the worlds biggest game of chinese whispers, nobody who wrote the bible ever met jesus its all "according to" but "according to someone who heard it from someone a few decades or hundreds of years earler"

    Also why is some of the bible the literal truth and the rest is up for interpretation?

    "god created the world in 6 days" well days clearly means thousands of years.
    "jesus rose from the dead in three days" no! three days its literally three days!


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  • #52
    Penn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 37,888 ✭✭✭✭Penn


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    @Joseph - Just wait until they take you down off that cross. I'll bleedin' kill ya meself so I will!

    @Jesus At least this cross won't fall apart like all the ****e you make. I'm lucky I went into business with my real da and not you


  • #53
    Mister men
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,487 ✭✭✭Mister men


    RIP jebus


  • #54
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    Mister men wrote: »
    RIP jebus

    He didnt even get that, 3 days later and he had to haul his ass out of being dead and move a huge rock before flying back to his home planet, or something.


  • #55
    smokingman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,812 ✭✭✭smokingman


    @MaryMagdalin: Hey babe, let's blow this joint and I'll show you who ya daddy is!


  • #56
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    smokingman wrote: »
    @MaryMagdalin: Hey babe, let's blow this joint and I'll show you who ya daddy is!

    Facebook status:
    Jesus is now in a relationship with Mary Magdalin
    Jesus is no longer friends with Judas
    Jesus has changed his home town to The Kingdom


  • #57
    Vicxas
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,646 ✭✭✭✭Vicxas


    Jesus died.... when :(


  • #58
    colinod0806
    Closed Accounts Posts: 614 ✭✭✭colinod0806


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    @Joseph - Just wait until they take you down off that cross. I'll bleedin' kill ya meself so I will!

    and this is how the story ended on the monday:pac:


  • #59
    smokingman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,812 ✭✭✭smokingman


    @Apostles - Hey guys, what say we hit the sauna for a Bunga Bunga party, I have dibs on Judas! :pac:


  • #60
    MagicSean
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,897 ✭✭✭MagicSean


    smokingman wrote: »
    @Apostles - Hey guys, what say we hit the sauna for a Bunga Bunga party, I have dibs on Judas! :pac:

    Jesus has invited you to an event: Resurrection Party.

    12 people attending, 1 maybe.

    Matthew and 3 other people like this


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  • #61
    tdv123
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,292 ✭✭✭tdv123


    Nope, he's still alive. Playing football in Spain now apparently.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jes%C3%BAs_Navas


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