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The Irish are the butt of every joke

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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,059 ✭✭✭Buceph


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    ...and all asians are considered chinese. :rolleyes:


    A funny.
    There was a Jew and a Chinaman sitting at the bar drinking.

    All of a sudden the Jew turns and punches the Chinaman in the face, knocking him off his stool.

    Stunned, the Chinaman gets up and says, "What the hell was that for?"

    The Jew replies, "That was for Pearl Harbor."

    The Chinaman says, "That was the Japanese, I'm Chinese."

    The Jew says, "Well you have black hair, squinted eyes, and buckteeth, it's all the same to me."

    The Chinaman says "Okay" and sits on his stool and continues drinking.

    About a half hour later the Chinaman turns and punches the Jew in the face, knocking him off his stool.

    The Jew gets up and says, "What the hell was that for?"

    The Chinaman says "That was for the Titanic."

    The Jew replies, "The Titanic? That was an iceberg!"

    The Chinaman says, "Iceberg, Goldberg, Steinberg, it's all the same to me."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Couldn't care less. And in fairness, there is a grain of truth to certain stereotypes - the spud-thick mick cliché does exist. Look at many politicians. That isn't a self-hating dig though - just stating fact. Of course that stereotype is not applicable to many, many Irish people. I'd rather ignore/disprove such a notion rather than getting angry/defensive about it or helping to perpetuate it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 583 ✭✭✭PandyAndy


    Dudess wrote: »
    Couldn't care less. And in fairness, there is a grain of truth to certain stereotypes - the spud-thick mick cliché does exist. Look at many politicians. That isn't a self-hating dig though - just stating fact. Of course that stereotype is not applicable to many, many Irish people. I'd rather ignore/disprove such a notion rather than getting angry/defensive about it or helping to perpetuate it.

    http://www.jackiehealyrae.com


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    major bill wrote: »
    obviously dont get the joke.. google father ted and yea usually in this country when people see an asian person they assume they are chinese like people on holidays assume irish people are english!!

    Ah...I've never heard of Father Ted before but I just googled him and are you referring to the episode where he put a lamp on his head and started imitating a chinaman? Hmm... lol.

    Anyway, yeah, assumptions about people are great. It's what makes the world go round. As long as no one is offended then it's grand!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,573 ✭✭✭pragmatic1


    I love potatoes and alcohol. I dont care if its a stereotype.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,421 ✭✭✭major bill


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    Ah...I've never heard of Father Ted before but I just googled him and are you referring to the episode where he put a lamp on his head and started imitating a chinaman? Hmm... lol.

    Anyway, yeah, assumptions about people are great. It's what makes the world go round. As long as no one is offended then it's grand!

    its a great episode ye should try and find it online it sums up in a comical way some peoples ignorance to differant cultures!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,750 ✭✭✭liah


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    You're not the butt of every joke...you're only associated with alcoholism and violence and that's not too bad...;)

    Now we asian people...all you have to do is skip a few words and take some V's and D's out and you automatically make fun of us. yay. "I make-uh sum pork frie rice for thee peepuh. Ohlee six nighdee fie." and we're blindfolded by toothfloss...

    I think you irish have it pretty good.

    When I read that bit, with the seriously racist Chinese accent in my head, I confess-- I giggled.

    Does that make me a racist? :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,090 ✭✭✭questionmark?


    pragmatic1 wrote: »
    I love potatoes and alcohol. I dont care if its a stereotype.

    Ya mean Poitín :P


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,059 ✭✭✭Buceph


    pragmatic1 wrote: »
    I love potatoes and alcohol. I dont care if its a stereotype.

    Potatoes are good.

    If we had another bout of blight I dunno if I could manage on just noodles, rice and pasta.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 558 ✭✭✭Metallitroll


    there may well be some grounds in this, for instance my Naga chum who is stationed in Delhi emailed me earlier n at the bottom was a string of jokes she says she got off the poker boards she plays on:
    oh, n here r some Irish jokes that some poker players on my table were sharing with each other, u prolly know them but i was amused and i just copied them to let u read too!

    An Irishman goes to a carpenter. "Can you build me a box that's two inches deep, two inches wide and 50 feet long?"
    Well," says the carpenter, "it could be done, I suppose, but what would you want with a box like that?"
    Well'" said the Irishman, "my neighbour moved away and forgot to take a few things with him -- and he asked me to send him his garden hose."

    whats the best thing to come out of ireland
    the polish!!

    How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    21 - One to hold the lightbulb, and 20 to drink until the room spins!

    Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses & lies on the bed spreadeagled and says "You know what I want dont you?"
    Yeah," says Paddy. "The whole friggin' bed by the looks of it!"

    An Englishman stops Paddy for directions... "Excuse me pal, what's the quickest way to Dublin?"Paddy says "Are you on foot or in the car?" The Englishman says "In the car."
    Paddy replies "That's the quickest!"

    Paddy & Murphy are working on a building site.Paddy says to Murphy 'Im gonna have the day off, I'm gonna pretend I'm mad!'He climbs up the rafters , hangs upside down & shouts
    'I'M A LIGHTBULB! I'M A LIGHTBULB!'
    Murphy watches in amazement!The Foreman shouts 'Paddy you're mad, go home.' So he leaves the site.
    Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well.'Where the hell are you going?' asks the Foreman.'I cant work in the friggin dark! ' says Murphy.

    did you hear about the kerry man that died and wanted to be buried at sea?
    his 2 brothers drowned digging the grave.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    liah wrote: »
    When I read that bit, with the seriously racist Chinese accent in my head, I confess-- I giggled.

    Does that make me a racist? :(

    No you're not a racist...since when is it racist to laugh at other people's expense?! It's just pure evil...;) J/k!

    major bill: I will definitely try to find that Father Ted video. Thanks for introducing me to it. :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    an australian mate of mine had a baby in the recent floods and decided to call him that: flood
    the poor bastard will be up to his neck in it all his life


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,511 ✭✭✭saywhatyousee


    there may well be some grounds in this, for instance my Naga chum who is stationed in Delhi emailed me earlier n at the bottom was a string of jokes she says she got off the poker boards she plays on:

    them jokes are terrible!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    Buceph wrote: »
    Potatoes are good.

    If we had another bout of blight I dunno if I could manage on just noodles, rice and pasta.

    Famine jokes are not funny dude. They are offensive in the extreme.

    And, if like I, you were offended by Buceph's post, and need to talk to someone in confidence about it, you should contact the "Famine Joke Supporters Hotline" at 1800-1potato-2potato-3 potato-4.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,059 ✭✭✭Buceph


    I've heard the rest of them before, but this one is great.
    An Englishman stops Paddy for directions... "Excuse me pal, what's the quickest way to Dublin?"Paddy says "Are you on foot or in the car?" The Englishman says "In the car."
    Paddy replies "That's the quickest!"

    Although, if you assign the punchlines in a lot of them to stupidity they go one way. If you assign the punchlines cute whorism or lads taking the piss out of an English guy they're actually presenting the Irish guys as quite witty. I mean I could imagine a aul lad in a pub being asked the "quickest way to Dublin" and giving that reply and the whole pub breaking its arse laughing.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,132 ✭✭✭x in the city


    major bill wrote: »
    its something very unique about the irish that we dont get offended by jokes easily...i know we are the butt of most jokes in england australia,america etc for been ''thicko's'' but fcuk it look what we have giving the world!!

    one of those things is humour

    Its a bit rich americans calling irish thickos....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,421 ✭✭✭major bill


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    No you're not a racist...since when is it racist to laugh at other people's expense?! It's just pure evil...;) J/k!

    major bill: I will definitely try to find that Father Ted video. Thanks for introducing me to it. :D


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCmcEWm83eo&feature=related


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    major bill wrote: »


    Ahh the video is blocked in my country. :( I did see the bit about his Hitler impression. Funny stuff :D

    x in the city: You're right. We silly Americans and our love of fast food. Yummy! *pukes*


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 558 ✭✭✭Metallitroll


    the irish are at the butt of every yoke

    get that, khyra :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    the irish are at the butt of every yoke

    get that, khyra :pac:

    The way we asians pronounce joke? o_O

    My ex is irish and the first time he said "that's a grand yoke!" to me I thought he was referring to yolk so I responded, "What about eggs?"

    I still don't quite grasp the whole yoke thing...but a grand yoke it is indeed!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,059 ✭✭✭Buceph


    the irish are at the butt of every yoke

    get that, khyra :pac:

    Irish people, are at the end of a cigarette, smoking it, through the butt, when they take yokes, which are drugs, ecstasy, which makes fags tasty?
    :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 560 ✭✭✭virmilitaris


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    ...and all asians are considered chinese. :rolleyes:

    Oh that is nothing compared to the Koreans. They group everyone from the Nigerians to the Australians to the Canadians into one category.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 71 ✭✭FunkDrummer


    People in other countries tell jokes like "an Irishman walks into a bar.... etc", you can be guaranteed that an Irish person has told the same joke with an English person or a Scot or a Welshman, it's just the norm. Within Ireland you even have Kerryman jokes, Corkman jokes, Dublin jokes.

    It all depends on who is tellin the joke and who they feel like slagging on that day! It's not exactly rocket science, people just like having a laugh.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    Oh that is nothing compared to the Koreans. They group everyone from the Nigerians to the Australians to the Canadians into one category.

    Oh wow...that's just wrong...but funny! hahaha! Silly Koreans...don't you just love ignorance? It's bliss...

    ...My dad thinks ni99ers (excuse the language) come from Nigeria...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 560 ✭✭✭virmilitaris


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    Oh wow...that's just wrong...but funny! hahaha! Silly Koreans...don't you just love ignorance? It's bliss...

    ...My dad thinks ni99ers (excuse the language) come from Nigeria...

    My wife refers to me as 'The foreigner' when we are in a restaurant ordering food. 'The foreigner' will have that. :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 71 ✭✭FunkDrummer


    Khyra24 wrote: »
    Oh wow...that's just wrong...but funny! hahaha! Silly Koreans...don't you just love ignorance? It's bliss...

    ...My dad thinks ni99ers (excuse the language) come from Nigeria...

    Wow, that is quite foolish, everybody knows The Niners come from San Francisco!! Quite rare to find American Football fans over here....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 689 ✭✭✭Khyra24


    Wow, that is quite foolish, everybody knows The Niners come from San Francisco!! Quite rare to find American Football fans over here....

    LOL! Sorry I just busted out laughing after reading this. Nice one. :D *gives everyone an eggroll*


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,808 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    tl/dr

    Tell him the standard anti-Paddy joke:

    How long does it take a Scots (English, whatever) woman to have a sh!t?






























    About 9 months.

    Shuts them up every time.

    Not your ornery onager



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,192 ✭✭✭Unpossible


    As a kerryman I've had to live with such cruel jibes everytime we ventured to the capital in spetember :( you learn to live with it and the multiple all-irelands, millions of tourists and tame dolphins in our county of unparalleled beauty helps give comfort in some small way :p


    Some of the funniest things I've read were descriptions of kerry people, "stupid but lovable" has me in stitches.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 558 ✭✭✭Metallitroll


    Unpossible wrote: »
    As a kerryman I've had to live with such cruel jibes everytime we ventured to the capital in spetember :( you learn to live with it and the multiple all-irelands, millions of tourists and tame dolphins in our county of unparalleled beauty helps give comfort in some small way :p


    Some of the funniest things I've read were descriptions of kerry people, "stupid but lovable" has me in stitches.

    when folk from as far flung places as the himalayan foothills are banding this sor ta thing about:
    did you hear about the kerry man that died and wanted to be buried at sea?
    his 2 brothers drowned digging the grave.

    then yeah ^^ i'd say you have it pretty bad.


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