Creationist rebuilds Noah's ark

Nodin · 17-02-2011 05:54PM

Monty Burnz wrote: »

Well you can build them whatever size you like, but you'd better up top with a big rubber ring when it fragments in the water.

Actually, I'm fairly sure the scale of the ship outlined in the Bible would just collapse under its own weight during the construction part, so theres no chance of a 'Hur, hur, Noah is pwned' on launch day by the folk God has, in his loving wisdom, decided to genocidally drown.

Plus theres the fact that it would, in an historical context, have to be tied together, rather than nailed. And then theres the problem of ventilation, feeding, food storage and waste removal, particularily given the size of the crew.

ye'd never guess I used be on a Fundamentalists v atheists board. Ahh the memories.....

Nodin · 17-02-2011 05:55PM

Barrington wrote: »

Noah's high ground

Noah's Zeppelin Fleet!!!!!!!!!!

My name is URL · 17-02-2011 05:56PM

You guys should build a battleship and sink whatever it is he believes it represents

Monty Burnz · 17-02-2011 05:58PM

Nodin wrote: »

Plus theres the fact that it would, in an historical context, have to be tied together, rather than nailed.

And when you consider that a newly-built boat leaks like a sieve until the timber expands with water to close the gaps; and when you consider the number of trees that would have to be felled, and the amount of work and finishing involved in making trees into useful planks...

Something about this story doesn't add up.

Nodin · 17-02-2011 06:08PM

My name is URL wrote: »

You guys should build a battleship and sink whatever it is he believes it represents

It's wood. A few firelighters and a box of matches would do the trick.

weiland79 · 17-02-2011 06:09PM

I built an igloo once.:)

Feeona · 17-02-2011 06:09PM

Please consider visiting some of the following web pages if you would like to learn more about the future intentions of Johan Huibers and what he does to keep busy

Good man Johan, idle hands are the devil's work. Don't you dare stop and think

Nodin · 17-02-2011 06:12PM

Monty Burnz wrote: »

And when you consider that a newly-built boat leaks like a sieve until the timber expands with water to close the gaps; and when you consider the number of trees that would have to be felled, and the amount of work and finishing involved in making trees into useful planks...

Something about this story doesn't add up.

Yep. Doesn't work without magic in any way shape or form. And, going on memory, theres no mention of Gods aid in building said ship, he just ordered it built.

Of course pointing all that out changes no minds at all, but it can be funny to see how long it is before someone has a spasm.

FreudianSlippers · 17-02-2011 06:13PM

Nodin wrote: »

It's wood. A few firelighters and a box of matches would do the trick.

Burn the bondholders creationists!

Gunsfortoys · 17-02-2011 06:16PM

I sure hope they keep a good eye on the animals...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDXnBRysQPY

KeithAFC · 17-02-2011 06:20PM

I think it looks great. He must know what he is doing.

ScumLord · 17-02-2011 07:27PM

Forest Master wrote: »

What's even funnier is that this guy believes the story, yet it took him a year and a half to build using modern tools & the help of his son, and he's not even finished. How does he think Noah did it with old tools on his own? Did he not think at any point "jees, there's no f*cking way Noah did all this sh*t on his own without the use of electric blade saws, and modern equipment, etc"!

They had the next best thing to power tools back then. Slave labour. He had a slave named DeWalt, one named black and decker and of course Bocsh.

Nodin wrote: »

Plus theres the fact that it would, in an historical context, have to be tied together, rather than nailed.

Are you implying that they didn't have nails in biblical times? They also had dowels and joints that would be just as effective.

It's a fair old feat he managed there, but I don't know how it could have done anything but burst the myth for him.

Deus Ex Machina · 17-02-2011 08:06PM

Funny how prior knowledge can affect your opinion of somebody's appearance. I saw creationist, and then when I saw the photo of the individual who built this impressive craft, I couldn't help but think he looks like such an idiot. If the same photo were placed in a story about a man who won the Nobel prize for physics I would be thinking he just exudes intellect.

I suppose I know how I'd look if a photo of me was placed aside this post, but sure that's the way it is.

UglyBolloxFace · 17-02-2011 08:16PM

Creationist builds Noah's ark

He should go build himself some cop on.

Monty Burnz · 17-02-2011 10:03PM

KeithAFC wrote: »

I think it looks great. He must know what he is doing.

It is kind of cool in a perverse way - it's just slightly odd that as he toils away with 21st technology he doesn't twig that this would be a tricky task for one (600 year old?) man back in the days when they didn't have Woodies. Or electricity. Or the wheel.

Nodin · 17-02-2011 11:51PM

ScumLord wrote: »

Are you implying that they didn't have nails in biblical times? They also had dowels and joints that would be just as effective.
im.

The Bible was written 700 BCE approx. However Noah, using Biblical chronology, would have been around 2400 BCE which precedes their use in ship building (and in building generally afaik).

FreudianSlippers · 19-02-2011 05:34PM

Nodin wrote: »

The Torah was written 450 BCE approx. However Noah, using Biblical chronology, would have been around 2400 BCE which precedes their use in ship building (and in building generally afaik).

FYP

Nodin · 19-02-2011 05:40PM

FreudianSlippers wrote: »

FYP

Hmmmm...where did I get 700 from? Old age is taking its toll....

FreudianSlippers · 19-02-2011 05:41PM

Interestingly regarding Noah's Ark story... it's almost identical (bar small differences) in all 3 of the major religions.

Nodin · 19-02-2011 05:46PM

Thats because the later two just copied the first....

Originally, things were a bit more modest
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2010/jan/01/noahs-ark-was-circular

FreudianSlippers · 19-02-2011 05:48PM

Nodin wrote: »

Hmmmm...where did I get 700 from? Old age is taking its toll....

The old documentary hypothesis theory basically assumed that the 5 books of the Torah were compiled from previously independent sources circa 900-500BCE. The B'reishit Scroll (Genesis) could have been from any period within that time.
This was the main theory for much of the 19th Century and early 20th Century, but isn't really considered good theory anymore.
Could be from that?

Seaneh · 19-02-2011 06:06PM

FreudianSlippers wrote: »

Interestingly regarding Noah's Ark story... it's almost identical (bar small differences) in all 3 of the major religions.

Which 3 would they be?

It would, in my opinion, add to the idea that there must have been, somewhere in the area below, at least a local flooding event that left a pretty large impression in the peoples who came from that area.

Remember, Noah didn't live in what is now Israel, He would have lived much further east.

There are 4 rivers named in Genesis, 2 which are still known by the same names, the Tigris and the Euphrates, the other two (The Pishon and The Gihon) are commonly though to be 2 of 3 rivers, The Nile, The Ganges and The Uizhun.

These rivers cover a massive area of land, which is generally accepted to be the region where civilisation as we know it today originated. Tillage, live stock raring, the wheel, domestication of wild animals for labour use, etc, all traced back to the area which now covers Israel to India.

The fact that all of the major religions which have formed in that area all, without fail, recount a flood event, surely makes it more all the more plausible?

but, sure, stuff like that isn't suitable for you lot to think about, because, like, it makes sense and makes your pseudo-intellectualism and sneering look a tad muppetish.

twinQuins · 19-02-2011 06:12PM

Seaneh wrote: »

pseudo-intellectualism and sneering look a tad muppetish.

Oh irony.

keano_afc · 19-02-2011 07:31PM

"But its in the bible!! It cant possibly be true!!"

Pfft. Another religion thread. Havent you self-righteous smug atheists got a forum of your own to back slap each other in?

Nodin · 19-02-2011 07:51PM

Seaneh wrote: »

The fact that all of the major religions which have formed in that area all, without fail, recount a flood event, surely makes it more all the more plausible?

A flood event in a river valley? Stop the lights there Bunny!!!!!!!!111!!!! Truly such an event requires the hand of God.

Seaneh wrote: »

but, sure, stuff like that isn't suitable for you lot to think about, because, like, it makes sense and makes your pseudo-intellectualism and sneering look a tad muppetish

I'm fairly sure we're sneering at (a) the idea of a divinely ordered world wide flood (b) a boat that is physically impossible to build (c) some fellah getting two of every animal onto said boat (d) some eejit who went off and built a half size model of what he thinks it was (not nessecarily in that order).

You might explain your accusation of "pseudo intellectualism" there.

keano_afc wrote:

"But its in the bible!! It cant possibly be true!!"

No, its actually not true, regardless of where it is, because of no evidence and being physically impossibile.

keano_afc wrote:

Havent you self-righteous smug atheists

Don't really see where the self righteous or smug idea comes from. And I wasn't aware you had to be an atheist not to believe in the Ark story.

strobe · 19-02-2011 07:57PM

Seaneh wrote: »

Which 3 would they be?

It would, in my opinion, add to the idea that there must have been, somewhere in the area below, at least a local flooding event that left a pretty large impression in the peoples who came from that area.

Remember, Noah didn't live in what is now Israel, He would have lived much further east.

There are 4 rivers named in Genesis, 2 which are still known by the same names, the Tigris and the Euphrates, the other two (The Pishon and The Gihon) are commonly though to be 2 of 3 rivers, The Nile, The Ganges and The Uizhun.

These rivers cover a massive area of land, which is generally accepted to be the region where civilisation as we know it today originated. Tillage, live stock raring, the wheel, domestication of wild animals for labour use, etc, all traced back to the area which now covers Israel to India.

The fact that all of the major religions which have formed in that area all, without fail, recount a flood event, surely makes it more all the more plausible?

but, sure, stuff like that isn't suitable for you lot to think about, because, like, it makes sense and makes your pseudo-intellectualism and sneering look a tad muppetish.

Cool rant bro.

Well personally I have no problem with the idea that there could have been a flood where Noah and his gang were hanging out. Floods happen all the time all over the world. The idea of a flood happening I have no problem with and from experience, most of my sneering pseudo-intellectual muppet peers don't have too much of a problem with that idea either.

The idea of a man single handedly building a boat of those dimensions and rounding up two (seven) individuals each out of the 400,000 different species of beetle located in Ireland, Mexico, Norway, Egypt, Guam and elsewhere on the other hand........

I won't even bring up the question of what the lions ate or the worms or the panda bears.......my pseudo-intellectualism starts to hurt when I get into that whole mess.

But really, cool rant bro.

strobe · 19-02-2011 08:00PM

keano_afc wrote: »

"But its in the bible!! It cant possibly be true!!"

Pfft. Another religion thread. Havent you self-righteous smug atheists got a forum of your own to back slap each other in?

Haven't you Christians got a forum of your own to hide in and comfort each other after you have been persecuted by the big evil baby eating atheists?

Seaneh · 19-02-2011 08:11PM

strobe wrote: »

Cool rant bro.

Well personally I have no problem with the idea that there could have been a flood where Noah and his gang were hanging out. Floods happen all the time all over the world. The idea of a flood happening I have no problem with and from experience, most of my sneering pseudo-intellectual muppet peers don't have too much of a problem with that idea either.

The idea of a man single handedly building a boat of those dimensions and rounding up two (seven) individuals each out of the 400,000 different species of beetle located in Ireland, Mexico, Norway, Egypt, Guam and elsewhere on the other hand........

I won't even bring up the question of what the lions ate or the worms or the panda bears.......my pseudo-intellectualism starts to hurt when I get into that whole mess.

But really, cool rant bro.

Because every Christian in the world believes that Genesis is to be taken as a literal history of creation...

Get off the high horse there Ted.

twinQuins · 19-02-2011 08:15PM

Remind me, is the Christian holy book the Bible or just the New Testament?

Nodin · 19-02-2011 08:31PM

Seaneh wrote: »

Get off the high horse there Ted.

You'd have to get down and let him on first....

Creationist rebuilds Noah's ark

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