How hard is it to emigrate to Israel?

whiteboy · 30-01-2011 03:30AM #1

Basically there are a myriad of reasons, it's essentially for the Mediterranean climate, but how difficult would it be to gain citizenship?

Metallergy · 30-01-2011 03:32AM

just put on a yank accent. should be second nature, the amount of exposure..

partyatmygaff · 30-01-2011 03:33AM

With the current situation in Egypt and Tunisia i'd think twice before leaving for Israel.

starbelgrade · 30-01-2011 03:36AM

whiteboy wrote: »

how difficult would it be to gain citizenship?

I don't think you need to gain citizenship to emigrate there. Normally, a visa is all that's required.

MrStuffins · 30-01-2011 03:36AM

Chop the top of your mickey off. So when they ask you for your passport to prove your Isreali, just say "no need" and whip it out!

They'll let you right in!

tenchi-fan · 30-01-2011 03:38AM

You need to be a Jew. And I don't mean following Jewish beliefs or customs. You have to fit their definition of Jewish. This is basically to keep out less desirable Jews like Africans who claim Jewish heritage.

Dangerous Man · 30-01-2011 03:39AM

Israel. Odd choice. Anyway, I'm sure this thread will be a success.

KylieWyley · 30-01-2011 03:40AM

whiteboy wrote: »

it's essentially for the Mediterranean climate

go to Italy then.

EU. Free movement of people.

LondonIrish90 · 30-01-2011 03:40AM

whiteboy wrote: »

Basically there are a myriad of reasons, it's essentially for the Mediterranean climate, but how difficult would it be to gain citizenship?

Convert to Judaism, it entitles you to Israeli citizenship

Israel is a beautiful country, Tel Aviv especially is a fantastic city. Women aren't bad either!

30-01-2011 03:41AM

LondonIrish90 wrote: »

Convert to Judaism, it entitles you to Israeli citizenship.

You need to have a Jewish mother to be "Jewish"

Metallergy · 30-01-2011 03:43AM

i'd say you're more concerned with raising the climate here tbh

starbelgrade · 30-01-2011 03:43AM

Deleted User wrote: »

You need to have a Jewish mother to be "Jewish"

You only need an Irish granny to be Irish.

It's called the "Jack Charlton Rule".

whiteboy · 30-01-2011 03:45AM

tenchi-fan wrote: »

You need to be a Jew. And I don't mean following Jewish beliefs or customs. You have to fit their definition of Jewish. This is basically to keep out less desirable Jews like Africans who claim Jewish heritage.

I agree, it's an odd choice but think of the heat! I'd rather be there sunbathing on Tel Aviv beach than be sitting here in this raining muck!

LondonIrish90 · 30-01-2011 03:46AM

Deleted User wrote: »

You need to have a Jewish mother to be "Jewish"

No you don't. If your mother is Jewish, you are considered Jewish by default. You can still convert though if you are not.

MrStuffins · 30-01-2011 03:46AM

Deleted User wrote: »

You need to have a Jewish mother to be "Jewish"

Get your mother to convert to Judaism, simples!

Metallergy · 30-01-2011 03:49AM

ok here:

attain replica trunks (2nd from left), swim.. if spotted rinse/brandish, before the turkey shoot begins. d'yis realize who i am.. some rubbish..

- n good luck?

Father Damo · 30-01-2011 03:54AM

You have to be the son of a Jew, or save the life of a Jew.

No, wait, that was the Stonecutters.

Personally I wouldnt contribute a penny to the economy of the murderous government in terms of emigrating there, buying their produce etc etc.

Sergeant · 30-01-2011 03:59AM

Father Damo wrote: »

Personally I wouldnt contribute a penny to the economy of the murderous government in terms of emigrating there, buying their produce etc etc.

Better turn off that mobile phone so. And rip that Intel processor out of your computer. Better make sure you don't use websites that have EMC storage arrays to store data or transactions.

Sungodbr · 30-01-2011 03:59AM

I hear the Rachael Corrie do a nice cruise from Irelandf to Israel and apparently they do a day trip through the gaza tunnels into the heart of Zion, lovely trip to see if you really like the real chosen land

whiteboy · 30-01-2011 04:00AM

I am amazed by the knowledge boardsies have of Jewish beliefs and customs. It is true to be considered rightfully Jewish your mother has to come from Jewish stock.

kraggy · 30-01-2011 04:03AM

LondonIrish90 wrote: »

No you don't. If your mother is Jewish, you are considered Jewish by default. You can still convert though if you are not.

Out of all religions, Judaism is the hardest to convert to. They don't just take you in cause you know all the stuff and declare your heartfelt belief in it. Even after that, they'll doubt you and put before you test after test.

Why anyone would want to convert to the religion or live in Israel is beyond me though.

Just read the news and you'll understand where I'm coming from.

Run_to_da_hills · 30-01-2011 04:03AM

partyatmygaff wrote: »

With the current situation in Egypt and Tunisia i'd think twice before leaving for Israel.

Apply for six months work on a Kabab and see if you like the country first.

whiteboy · 30-01-2011 04:09AM

Run_to_da_hills wrote: »

Apply for six months work on a Kabab and see if you like the country first.

kibbutz!?

Cavehill Red · 30-01-2011 04:09AM

whiteboy wrote: »

Basically there are a myriad of reasons, it's essentially for the Mediterranean climate, but how difficult would it be to gain citizenship?

Virtually impossible unless you're a Jew confirmed as such by an Orthodox rabbi.

The reason for this is that Israel is a racist, apartheid state which only permits immigration via a process called 'Aliyah'.
This means that the indigenous Arabic Palestinians, whose land Israel occupies, must be ethnically cleansed from the land and it be filled in turn with imported Jews from other countries.
Unlike elsewhere, but quite akin to their nemesis the Nazi Party of mid-20th century Germany, Israel is built on a blood myth that it must be a 'pure' state, filled with Jews.
In turn, Jews are as much an ethnicity or race as a religion. One cannot easily convert. They do not proselytise.
Furthermore, it's an absolute kip of a place. Metal detectors and armed guards on the doors of shops, army kids wandering around with uzis everywhere, invasive searches, highly militarised, the risk of running into terrorism.
There's a reason so many young Israelis live elsewhere or else take years out in places like India and Thailand (two of the few countries they're welcome in). Their homeland is a Nazi regime.

johnmcdnl · 30-01-2011 04:15AM

whiteboy wrote: »

I agree, it's an odd choice but think of the heat! I'd rather be there sunbathing on Tel Aviv beach than be sitting here in this raining muck!

until the bombs start dropping down - and everyone in ireland cheers as israel burns

Sungodbr · 30-01-2011 04:23AM

gonna be some rate of tax there as well, when the egyptians attack:P

Cavehill Red · 30-01-2011 04:25AM

Oh, and I never mentioned the cockroaches. They're everywhere - shops, hotels, bars, restaurants. It's disgusting.
Funny, isn't it, how multiculturalism is considered the desirable thing in every country bar Israel?
The last country to have blood laws for citizenship was South Africa, and it was a pariah state. Yet somehow Israel gets away with their blood myth nation.

af_thefragile · 30-01-2011 04:30AM

Why would you wanna go to Israel in particular?

If its just for the climate, there are so many other brilliant places to go to. Such as Spain, Portugal, Italy, Greece... And if you want something different, Morocco is an amazing place too... Much easier to live in these places than in Israel.

whiteboy · 30-01-2011 04:32AM

af_thefragile wrote: »

Why would you wanna go to Israel in particular?

If its just for the climate, there are so many other brilliant places to go to. Such as Spain, Portugal, Italy, Greece... And if you want something different, Morocco is an amazing place too... Much easier to live in these places than in Israel.

It being different is a part of it, I'd like to meet some Jews!

Sergeant · 30-01-2011 04:34AM

whiteboy wrote: »

I'd like to meet some Jews!

Manhattan.

af_thefragile · 30-01-2011 04:36AM

whiteboy wrote: »

It being different is a part of it, I'd like to meet some Jews!

Well you can meet them in Ireland too. Plenty even in UK and USA. No need to go live in Israel. Unless you're Jewish and you buy into that "promised land" crap...

How hard is it to emigrate to Israel?

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